| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 4:40:22 AM | I have met a few men dureing my time of being single and it seems to me that a lot of them have made so much more of their lives than I have since being on my own. Obviously there will be a lot of women who have done the same. But I find it difficult to know what to offer these fella's...normally working hard dureing the week, they already have their bachelor pad, they have their friends (male and female) who accompany them on holidays, they have their hobbies which they busy themselves with dureing the weekends, normally have another group of friends they can call apon to go out to the pub with etc. I find it really hard to imagine where I would fit in?
Do other women come across this?
And do the men I discribe actually want a woman for anything more than a bit of hanky panky with now and again?  | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 5:04:21 AM | | I do know what you mean but and yes am one of those woman who has her own house all paid for. good job have friends to go out with the only thing to offer is yourself which should be enough. bloody true about the hanky panky my god didnt know men could be so sex mad. my ex never bothered. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 5:14:22 AM | | I believe their lives are more full because they don't live with their children. Their evenings are free to suit themselves, whereas single mothers with children need to cope with their needs, and of course there is more housework they have to do. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 5:19:06 AM | Yes......
Women are smelly and annoying, And they pick their noses.
So we only date Women when we want to get depressed after having way too much fun tripping the light fantastic.
Sometimes i miss having the regular company of one, but not nearly enough to put up with the nose picking for too long (although you can get used to the smell after a while) | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:25:09 AM | Of course !!! If you liken it to having a car.....you dont NEED one but now and again they come in handy and have their uses.......but only now and again! | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:29:48 AM | | I was young when I started my long term relationship, so I didn’t do a lot of things in my 20s that would be considered the norm. Boys holidays, a lot of nights out and in general the things that young guys do. I now find that i will be doing some of these things now albeit a few years later than I planned. There are things that have changed me and i will probably be a bit more selfish about things in the future, but I do want to be with someone and share other things in life. I already miss that, and no its not just about sex. I’d be pretty shallow to want to be with someone just for that. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:58:38 AM |
I was young when I started my long term relationship, so I didn’t do a lot of things in my 20s that would be considered the norm.
I did the same, I was 19 when I met my partner, we were in college together, my 20's were spent working 60-70 hour weeks trying to get a business off the ground. I never did any of the things my counterparts were doing. Now, having found myself single again at 35, I'm doing all the things I should really have been doing then. I have my own house, am independent and self reliant - because I've had to be. You could say I'm in the position of the men the OP mentioned. I don't think the guy I'm seeing has anything lacking in his life that he needs to see me, we're together - when we're together - because we want to be, not need to be. We have fun and enjoy each other's company but neither of us are reliant upon the other.
H.x | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 6:59:25 AM | when i split up with my ex fiance..i decided id like to stay single for a little while and have my own independence..that was about 27 years ago..and im still enjoying my freedom and care free lifestyle..it aint too bad..i like it anyway... | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 7:53:51 AM | I have met a few men dureing my time of being single and it seems to me that a lot of them have made so much more of their lives than I have since being on my own. Obviously there will be a lot of women who have done the same. But I find it difficult to know what to offer these fella's...normally working hard dureing the week, they already have their bachelor pad, they have their friends (male and female) who accompany them on holidays, they have their hobbies which they busy themselves with dureing the weekends, normally have another group of friends they can call apon to go out to the pub with etc. I find it really hard to imagine where I would fit in?
Do other women come across this?
And do the men I discribe actually want a woman for anything more than a bit of hanky panky with now and again?
Personally, I only spend so much time out and about because there's no one at home to cuddle up to. I work long hours, spend time with my mates in my free time because there's nothing to be home for. In fact, the only time I spend at home is when I have my kids over each weekend. However, I'd love nothing more than there be someone to come home to and cook for, someone to be intimate with, someone to share life with. Mates, work and hobbies are all well and good, but nothing compares to having a relationship with. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 7:56:36 AM | If the want FWB then they sound like not the sort you looking for anyways.
Tick no intimate encounters on your mail page, should get shot of them - Happy fishing | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 9:32:16 AM | First off Des tut tut he may just be a softie we are not all the same !!!!!!
I have every thing i want in life job house grown up kids, i can do what i want , i have friends all over the place but thats just it FRIENDS.
Not one of those people are mine and just mine.......I dont want to just plod along, if and when someone who floats my boats comes along all well and good but whos to say i want then to move in, I at this stage in my life can only offer weekends. but even then it would have to be fireworks, i will never go with the flow ever again. him in 1 room me in another................. 48 hours of Fabulous over 120 hours of boring anytime !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
The answer is no every one deep down wants some one they can call
MINE | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 9:52:20 AM | I have a daughter does that count?
Thats more than enough over emotional female hormones for me thanks, aged 7 and already losing stuff in handbags, its not nurture ladies it nature you are born that way,fact! | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 11:21:46 AM |
And do the men I discribe actually want a woman for anything more than a bit of hanky panky with now and again?
No there's ironing too. 
I believe their lives are more full because they don't live with their children.
Personally I did live with one of my kids for a while - and when that ended it left a huge hole in my life and I missed his wit and slobbishness and little teen strops and the big hugs. I suspect a lot of guys would prefer to be with their kids. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 11:41:16 AM | I have found that a fair few men of my age group or slightly older who now have such a life style, and have never been married or had a proper long-term relationship (5+ years), might say they would like to meet a woman for LTR, but often they find they can't really fit them in without making a few changes/compromises to the lifestyle they love so much and are used to. And a lot of that group are not willing to make those changes. If they find a similar minded woman then it could work, but unfortunately I'm not like that.
So I keep looking at times. He's out there. Somewhere. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 2:10:26 PM | yes and no, depends on the woman
if wrong woman, well my life would be more complete without her
if right woman, well my life would be incomplete without her.
I know who is right for me, and its a bit sad that she isnt with me at the moment, and would strive to do anything to be with her. thus hence my life incomplete without her (maybe im just a big wuss) | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 2:12:11 PM | Like Hunnibelle I find this very common in the 40+ male.
Usually when they are separated or divorced they miss family life ( even though they may be loath to admit it) so they fill their lives with work and a myriad hobbies. They are terrified of feeling lonely, so they are constantly out and about. My last boyfriend spent every evening at the gym. Twice a week it was running club then the gym followed by swimming.
I can understand this, but the problems arise when they try and fit you in. There seems to be a distinct reluctance to compromise. In my experience if anything else makes demands on their time (usually the ex/kids/divorce) you get dropped like a hot brick.
As a result, I'm very wary of getting involved with men like this. Don't get me wrong, I have a good and active life myself, but I would like to meet someone and have a real relationship, not be something a guy reluctantly slots into his busy timetable... | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 2:47:33 PM | I'm finding the same as Adele and Hunni, perhaps it's the age group. Sift through the 'available' pool of men who are single, find the odd one who's got that special spark and out of the few who seem suitable, is there a mutual attraction? Get through ALL those hurdles and go on a date... (without failures in communication and you both actually arrive at date...) chemistry? Yes??? Yippee!!!! Or not... cos inevitably you find yourself negotiating when they can fit you into their busy work/social life and of course you have things you do too... no-one's free 24/7 but for crying out loud!!!
I had a first date Thursday night with a charming, intelligent, attractive man who had charisma in bucketloads and professed himself very impressed with me. We got on really well. It nearly went pearshaped when he had to work late, but I agreed to meet up late and drove over to his area, so I was dead tired at work on Friday. He has what I'd class as an 'important' job and worked til almost midnight Friday night, worked today and I imagine he's knackered now. He'll have other things to fit into his 'free' time too, I can pretty much predict this is doomed even now whilst I'm still quite interested!
We'll see if he calls tomorrow! | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 3:19:36 PM | It certainly can be. For me it's only sad being single when I haven't got that special someone to share good news with.
As a result, my recent lottery win was a bit of an anti-climax. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 3:34:00 PM |
of course there is more housework they have to do.
I have to have a hearty guffaw at this much trotted out fallacy. I live alone and have done for several years now. I have a job (only one now) at which I spend much of my week, and I have to cook & clean etc. for myself. How exactly does a woman have more work to do around the house than me? If you are using the old fallback position of the children, remember that over a certain age, they are at school, and therefore you are free to carry out chores through the day, whereas someone in a fulltime job is not. If they are old enough, what is wrong with THEM picking up after themselves, as I have to? For single people with no children, if I want to eat through the week, I have to prepare my lunches and dinners in advance, and I also have to do all my own laundry, as well as make sure my car is in a reasonable condition to continue chugging its way to work. The advantage with not going out to work on a fulltime basis is that you have much more time to do the housework, and you also have the option to have a break whenever it suits you.
The advantage us guys have living as batchelors is that we can get on with stuff without a running commentary in the background, and better yet, we have a practical grasp of how important some of the details really are. It doesn't matter if the toilet seat is up or down. If we wear the same teeshirt as yesterday, it doesn't matter, and certainly not if someone else turns up wearing the same one. If there is a spider in the bath, it better get out before I fill the bath, otherwise it's gonna drown. I will get the bike out of the dining room eventually. (Honest...lol) The bags of sand and cement beside the bike WILL get used when the weather is right and I can be arsed. Just now, they are safe and sound, in the dry. Any program (soaps specifically) where you cannot grasp the plot within five minutes of switching the telly on probably wasn't worth watching anyway. Sitting in your undies or a pair of jogging bottoms with a drink while you play "Splinter Cell" into the wee small hours will NOT lead to the end of civilisation, so go to sleep and don't worry about it...!!!
The main downside that some batchelors mention about singlehood is the sex. Well, I must say I have a vivid, healthy and active sex life...although it would be nice if at least one other person was involved on the odd occasion... | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 3:41:56 PM |
I believe their lives are more full because they don't live with their children.
Personally I did live with one of my kids for a while - and when that ended it left a huge hole in my life and I missed his wit and slobbishness and little teen strops and the big hugs. I suspect a lot of guys would prefer to be with their kids.
In spite of two court orders, and a lot of perseverance, (including the involvement of my MSP with a school matter), I have had no contact with my daughter (who turned sixteen last week) in nine years. Her seventy eight year old Gran has not seen her only grandchild in nearly as long. When we were all still together, any time not at work was normally spent with my daughter. Many of us guys would give anything to be with our children, and not simply treated as a wallet on legs, but that ain't really gonna happen now, is it? As a result of that sort of stuff, more than a couple of us hit our middle age appear to come across as quite cynical about the whole relationship, and fulfilment stuff. Maybe it's because acting like big teenagers, and getting to enjoy life means that we get to thikn about stuff less before we have to zap back into the real world? Just a thought... | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 5:18:53 PM | hmm i think just as women myself being one) dont mind living alone or whatever I am sure men are the same, why should a man need a woman when a woman doesnt need a man .
it comes down to want dont you think ???
I personally would love a guy who has hobbies and goes out and so forth becuase I like my own time too, that has nothing to do with age I was married for 15 years and we always kept our own time too...
I have more respect also for a man who does see his kids and they have a amicable relationship with their kids mum and I think at 30/40s its something we all have to learn to accept.
As for owning , no one will ever own me as I dont expect to own them , you can have a relationship with someone without being soley dependant on them i hope 
nice comments boys btw LOL | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 7:11:00 PM | When I became single a year ago I dreaded becoming one of those peeps who didn't need anyone in their life.
I reckoned I had about 3-4 years to find true love before I would hit this stage.
Well 12 months on, i've licked my wounds I got a great career, some good friends, and a house-keeper to look after me. And I just brought a sexy new car.
I have girlfriends but I think I'm become more of a commitment-phobic every day as my life comes together.
Thanks darling, I could never have done it with you!   | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 7:23:13 PM | | You can't substitute a proper relationship with a woman. One night stands and flings might be fun but a long term relationship is far more emotionally rewarding. Men and Women need each other. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/7/2009 7:37:07 PM | To me it is more about wanting somoene/to be with someone than about needing someone.
I do not like feeling needed as this normally causes complications.
Not sure if this makes sense to anyone but this is how I feel. | |
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| Are mens lives complete with out a woman?
Posted: 11/8/2009 12:08:28 AM | OP the lifestyle that you have described sounds very much like mine, i was only thinking the other evening as to whether i actually have time or am prepared to schedule time into my life with a man.
Altho the hanky panky bit does sound quite alluring | |
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