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 Lady_A_D
Joined: 12/25/2006
Msg: 1
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Cougar's??Page 1 of 4    (1, 2, 3, 4)
I was asked a question at Lunch Bunch today that made me also curious. If an older woman dates a much younger man she is referred to as a Cougar. A gentleman asked me that if the same thing applied to an older man and much younger women, then what would he be referred to as. I had no answer for and told him I would post a thread and see what input I could get.
 ~Lone Ranger~
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 2
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/5/2009 3:11:14 PM
A dirty old man????????

or Sugar Daddy
 TJ7
Joined: 11/8/2009
Msg: 3
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/5/2009 3:20:42 PM
^^^^

I've dated younger men (up to 10 years younger) and have never considered myself a cougar. I consider a cougar as a woman who dates a much younger man than herself - like by 15 years or so. And I would never date a man much younger - close to my oldest daughter's age (24). To me, that's just creepy and too close to home.

I know - age is just a number - but I want to date someone that at least knows what the 60's and 70's were like

And LR - what's the word for the woman/man who dates the much older man/woman??? Gold digger?
 ~Lone Ranger~
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 4
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/5/2009 3:28:03 PM
I remember the 50's and before TV-toooooooo old correct?????
Gold digger does certainly ring a familiar memory
-I knew someone would come up with what I was trying to remember-CRS(well most things)
 MissElaineESJones
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 5
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/5/2009 4:33:31 PM
I looked up the famous spring/fall marriage of Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher to see what their age difference is. She is 42 and he is 27, a difference of 15 years.

When I think of a woman who is called a cougar, I picture her as being on the hunt for young men, going from one to the other. I don't think of a woman who wants to commit to a young man, only to have a fling with them. She would be a woman who flaunts her sexuality as the bait she is using to draw these young men in.

Even though I am older, I would not fit into the category of cougar since I'm not preying on anyone and would never think of doing so.

I do wish we could get past the numbers, however. I was told once that even though I look younger than I am, I was too old for this guy.
 climbsagain
Joined: 1/20/2008
Msg: 6
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/5/2009 6:11:07 PM
Question: What is a cougar?

The short answer: A cougar is an older woman who is primarily attracted to and has sex with with significantly younger men.
Answer: The most commonly-accepted definition of a cougar is a woman 40 years of age or older who exclusively pursues very young men. The onset of the cougar years is hotly debated. Some feel that a cougar can be as young as 35, but women of this age would not be viewed as cougars unless their sexual conquests were no older than 25; the ten-year age difference seems to be an unspoken but accepted minimum between partners.
Typically, cougars prey upon men almost young enough to be their sons. Thus fortysomething cougars would be attracted to men in their 20s, and fiftysomething cougars would pursue men in their 30s and so on. Some cougars are less interested in a relationship than a sexual conquest, perhaps enjoying the fact that they are physically appealing to men who are considered to be in the prime of their virility.

A cougar may be married or unmarried, and some even go after their daughters' boyfriends.

Although the term 'cougar' comes from the big-game predatory cat of the same name, the cougar connection also may allude to the wearing of animal print clothing by older and more sexually aggressive women.
 TJ7
Joined: 11/8/2009
Msg: 7
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/5/2009 10:31:02 PM

Typically, cougars prey upon men almost young enough to be their sons.


Uh oh.........if I'm preying upon 'boys' almost young enough to be MY son......then I'm in BIG trouble - my son is 12
 climbsagain
Joined: 1/20/2008
Msg: 8
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 4:32:43 AM
Uh oh.........if I'm preying upon 'boys' almost young enough to be MY son......then I'm in BIG trouble - my son is 12


Found the definition online. The other fact it did not mention is that Cougars are very hot for their age, thus the ability to attract very young men.
 surfergrlfly
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 9
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 6:41:08 AM
Climbs again said.... "the cougar connection also may allude to the wearing of animal print clothing by older and more sexually aggressive women."

OMG that is HILARIOUS...I better not where any of MY animal print clothing...don't want to be labeled a "cougar"!!
 ~*Kathy*~
Joined: 11/29/2009
Msg: 10
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 8:04:29 AM
Hmmmm let me see if I can get this right.. IM a cougar because I dated someone 14 yrs younger than me.. NO.... Im a gold digger because I dated someone 15 yrs older than myself... NO.... I need a sugar daddy so I date someone 10 yrs older... How about I just found that those particular men were appealing in some way or another.. nothing to do with sexual conquests..or anything of the sort.. I don't agree with the word COUGAR!! Thats a cat you find at the zoo!!!!!
 ~Lone Ranger~
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 11
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 8:19:47 AM
You know where I could go with that Kc-but I will behave myself in true Ranger fashion
:$$:
 YourCuteGuy1
Joined: 5/14/2007
Msg: 12
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 1:18:28 PM
Cougars are generally considered women of affluence. And they take care of their boy toys in return for their hot young bodies. Think pool cleaning boy here...

Gold diggers date anyone of affluence who will spend money on them. Once the money is gone, so is the gold digger.

Sugar daddies generally are old enough to be daddies of the women who date them for the security and power the sugar daddy offers.

A realist is someone who knows who they are and what they can expect from any given relationship. You get what you give.

What do you bring to the table? Is it really anything that is exchangeable for what you really want to exchange it for?

For most people it's not.

Do women really bring to the table what guys really want?

Do guys really bring to the table what women really want?

Usually not.

And so we have the phenomena of incongruent exchange. We buy each other's commodities for short periods of time, or we make temporary exchanges. Sometimes we do this in hopes of reaching permanent agreements and sometimes they are just a means to an end.

Regardless, permanent equilateral agreements are hard to come by and harder to maintain.

And so, we have people taking on roles in which they pursue taking what they can get based on what they have to offer in return.

Not all older women can be a cougar, not all rich women can be a cougar, nor can all beautiful, sexy women be a cougar. You have to have a little of each to be a cougar.

And so it goes for all stereotypes.
 whatacrok
Joined: 2/9/2009
Msg: 13
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 3:49:24 PM
I think I was meant to be a cougar .......

Ahhh, cuteguy .... you ruin all my fun!


<div class="quote">
Do women really bring to the table what guys really want?

Do guys really bring to the table what women really want?


If I don't bring what he wants, we go out to dinner!
If he doesn't bring what I want, we go out to dinner!
That explains my sudden weight gain!

On a serious note ... isn't it more than just looks, finances and conversation?
What happen to building on respect, integrity, loyalty, character, intimacy
with someone on the same emotional, physical and emotional plane...
Or have I been doing this all wrong!


I am trying out for a cougar role .. where do I go for that!
 YourCuteGuy1
Joined: 5/14/2007
Msg: 14
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 4:28:13 PM
Sorry about the reality check, lol.

[On a serious note ... isn't it more than just looks, finances and conversation?
What happen to building on respect, integrity, loyalty, character, intimacy
with someone on the same emotional, physical and emotional plane...]

Those would do for a normal relationship, but for a cougar with its toys, I don't think those other things fit in the picture, lol.

If you figure out how to have both, I want a bottle of it... Then look out all you 20 somethings!
 MissElaineESJones
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 15
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 6:22:37 PM
um, I was wondering if animal print underwear counts.

The animal print reference brought to mind a picture of Carol Burnett dressed as that swinger character in her animal print.
 surfergrlfly
Joined: 2/15/2006
Msg: 16
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 7:06:17 PM
Sharon, Let's go shopping...I need more animal prints!!
 JackRab
Joined: 10/15/2006
Msg: 17
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Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 7:40:55 PM
Sharon, Let's go shopping...I need more animal prints!!


Grrrrrrrrrr !!! ........Now you Have my......ATTENTION !!
ME.....TARZAN,......ARE YOU JANE ! HA HA HA !
 ~Lone Ranger~
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 18
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 7:46:29 PM
^^^And I thought Ms Elaine was referring to another thread where she was talking about pool--------
 MissElaineESJones
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 19
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/6/2009 8:33:01 PM
I'll wear my animal print underwear in case I get my pants beat off playing pool.

Oh, my! What are people going to think? Better look at the Lunch Bunch pic thread to get this joke.
 ~Lone Ranger~
Joined: 2/4/2009
Msg: 20
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/7/2009 2:44:20 AM
Would that be the Lion print or Mickey Mouse ones?????
 MissElaineESJones
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 21
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/7/2009 5:37:10 AM
^^^That would be cheetah: swift, highly maneuverable and deadly.
 His Holiness THE CEO
Joined: 10/10/2009
Msg: 22
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Cougar's??
Posted: 12/8/2009 11:37:06 AM
I kinda see the whole Cougar thing as nothing more than the female version of a midlife crisis.
 MissElaineESJones
Joined: 8/28/2009
Msg: 23
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/14/2009 1:21:57 PM
There is a YouTube video entitled "Oldest bride and youngest groom" where the bride is 95 years old and the groom is 25. I am speechless.
 climbsagain
Joined: 1/20/2008
Msg: 24
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/14/2009 3:24:22 PM
There is a YouTube video entitled "Oldest bride and youngest groom" where the bride is 95 years old and the groom is 25. I am speechless.


That does not mean she is a Cougar nor does it mean that he is sane.
 ~~Jackie~~
Joined: 11/15/2009
Msg: 25
Cougar's??
Posted: 12/15/2009 10:46:17 AM
I guess I missed this thread. Interesting subject… In the past I’ve even posted on the forums that I thought there was a problem with it (in reference to someone I knew that habitually dated people that were 20 to 30 years younger than themselves). But, is it really that black and white??

When an older woman habitually preys on much younger men for the purpose of sex only (“boy toy”, no actual relationship beyond sex), I agree that puts her into the “cougar” category. What do they call the young men that are willing to have this kind of “relationship” for the purpose of money, gifts, or whatever the payment is? Gigolo?

When an older man wants to always have young women on his arm (and pays for it in some way- money, gifts, providing living conditions for the woman)- yes, I agree he’s a “dirty old man” or "sugar daddy". And she is what? Usually a very high priced prostitute even if she is providing this kind of service to only one old man at a time.

When it comes to developing a friendship with someone, age has nothing to do with it.

What if-- you have developed a close friendship over a span of years, and at some point you both realize/admit that what you feel for each other is really much more than that? The age span had nothing to do with the development of the friendship, so does it have to be the determining factor on rather or not it can go past that when you already truly care for each other? Or does that make the older man a “dirty old man”, or the older woman a “cougar”?

What if- the older man or older woman doesn’t seek “relationships” with someone much younger, but they meet someone that they are really drawn to that is younger than what society traditionally accepts as “normal”. Does that one attraction/relationship make the older man a “dirty old man”, or the older woman a “cougar”?
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