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 crystal.b
Joined: 10/19/2009
Msg: 1
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing mePage 1 of 2    (1, 2)
I recently met a guy who is on this site.........this is a weird situation, he is a father to a child at my kids school and i have talked to him randomly at the school, i was online last week and he happened to come across my profile so he messaged me saying he had been interested in me everytime he had seen me but was to shy to talk to me, we talked and texted all week, we had plans to get together and he called last minute to cancel, no big deal as i have made it clear iam not looking for a sexual relationship, stricly friends........i saw him again the next morning at the school, he had every excuse you could think of for cancelling, which really didnt mean much to me because im not really interested in him in that sense, you see im new to town and am just looking for friends..........so he makes plans for the next day, and yet again no show this time without a phone call..........now i have deleted him from my phone and written it off as a loss of time........i think everything is all said and done and WHAMMO his wife finds me and messages me on facebook, yes you read that right HIS WIFE, his POF profile has no picture and he states it is because he doesnt want any crazy people to come to his work, but really it is because he is MARRIED, now i have his psycho wife harassing me and accusing me of being a slut, but I NEVER TOUCHED her husband, he is the one cheating, his profile says single and he had every parent at the school even convinced he was a single dad............yet his facebook profile has pictures of him and his family, had i known his last name sooner i could have saved myself all of this grief, how do i get his wife off of my back now, she doesnt seem to believe i didnt do anything with him (HONESTLY he isnt my type sexually so i never would have wasted my time anyways) Please any advice is welcome
 ghostdog1973
Joined: 1/2/2010
Msg: 2
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:06:40 AM
Did you know he was married before she called you?

If so- you already 'crossed' the line to slutdom a bit by being in contact with him...

Time to put the rusty halo down
 Violator_Girl
Joined: 10/18/2009
Msg: 3
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:07:04 AM
Copy and paste the message and his profile to his wife.

Tell her you're not interested in arguing with her over someone you're not interested in.
 crystal.b
Joined: 10/19/2009
Msg: 4
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:09:23 AM
If you had read it correctly NO i didnt know he was married, im new to town, but even other parents at the kids school thought he was a single parent, he has MANY people convinced he is single, im not an angel, but im not the kind of girl that sleeps with married men, but understand IM NOT LOOKING FOR SEX, no where on my profile does it say that and i dont message guys with that intent, im looking for FRIENDS
 SingleGuy4912
Joined: 7/25/2006
Msg: 5
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:31:34 AM
Send her to his PoF and Facebook pages. Problem solved.
 MsStackhouse
Joined: 5/20/2009
Msg: 6
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:55:24 AM

Send her to his PoF and Facebook pages. Problem solved..


Yup...just copy the link into a facebook message and send it to her...then block her from contacting you...
 crystal.b
Joined: 10/19/2009
Msg: 7
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:56:02 AM
thank you all.........happy fishing
 e*Musing
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 8
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:57:55 AM

...now i have his psycho wife harassing me and accusing me of being a slut, but I NEVER TOUCHED her husband
And this is how degrading terms for women have traditionally been born...women catfighting other women have come up with some of the meanest and vilest words known to man. It's been going on for thousands of years...

Every man is someones past, preset or future ex...and it's amazing how many of those women need a place to dump their bile.

 want to travel
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 9
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 8:34:18 AM
WOW that is so very unfair to you, hope she doesnt do something crazy to you
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 10
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 8:36:35 AM
Realising you did not know he was married, there are a few key things that give married men looking to cheat away...

They don't give out home phone numbers, are always trying to meet in places at certain hours, and these places are places where its likely know one they know will see them, The times they contact you could be viewed as worked around the wife being around...he, he....

These but are a few examples, sure there are more.....lets just hope, she doesn't get so pissed she tries to go public to where it can effect your standing in the community, to which civil action can be brought against her.

I wonder how she found out who you are? As far as I know you can write/call her and explain you did not know he was married, and did not do anything with him....after that if it continues, block her from contact on the net, and all....you could arrange to sit and talk with her, but we don't know how crazy she might be.

Maybe after she cools down a bit, you talk about it and resolve it, but if she's sending you messages and things, you can block her for now.
 luckyhot777s
Joined: 12/26/2008
Msg: 11
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 8:42:17 AM
Great advice above....send her to face book, and pof...maybe to even see this post...

Good luck, these sites and the internet world of dating..sure is a learning experience and you have to be so careful.

I suggested a few things that might help in seeing if its a cheating married person(yes, women do it too)....but perhaps a question asking...what are the immediate signs that show a person is married and straying might be a good question and what can you say or do, that will cause them to answer to where its a dead give away...might be a good question to ask...to me not giving out a home phone number is good, but I'm sure others could provide some info.
 SoftAndHappy
Joined: 6/15/2009
Msg: 12
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 9:42:08 AM
Try to have some compassion for the crazy lady. The thing is... a lot of people prefer to blame the other man or woman for cheating behaviour. You see... if it's YOUR fault, in her head that means that her relationship is potentially "ok" and that it may not have anything to do with her husband - or worse - her.

THIS, IMO, is why people should always place the blame where the blame is due - on the cheater.

The woman is in a desperate place. Her husband is cheating or looking to cheat, they have children, and her world is crashing down all around her. Send her to his POF and wish her the best of luck. Then block her. You don't have to take her abuse, but IMO, you shouldn't try to fight back either. She is already wounded - that is why she is acting that way. A little compassion goes a long way.
 scottey63
Joined: 3/8/2008
Msg: 13
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 10:34:05 AM
Hard to read and comment on this, since your original post is one long sentence. Periods and paragraphs are good things.
 deltadallas
Joined: 7/13/2009
Msg: 14
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 10:47:04 AM
i want to thank the POF for putting this info out to warn the other chicks. this makes me questions MEN who do not have pictures on their profiles because they are probably MARRIED, Ugly or GAME players. you need to call this guy out in a public place like the school and his "invisible " wife will leave you alone and "tiger woods" heer husband with a club. please, get yourself a taser or mase (pepper spray). you are kinda cute (not hitting on you) and the wifey might want to put a hurting on you.

a few years back , a guy was doing the same thing and he brought his wife to the other woman's house where they beat the "other woman" up (messed up her face). be careful with this psycho wife.
 wetfish77
Joined: 12/15/2009
Msg: 15
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 11:00:50 AM
I agree with deltadallas

Some of these guys have been doing it for so long they are pros. They can fool an experienced or streetsmart person.

I was the victim twice. Restraining orders are handy. Keep a paper trail.
 ManicMelanie
Joined: 7/10/2009
Msg: 16
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 12:29:26 PM

For starters, take HIM (which also means her) OFF your FB friends list. That will keep her (and him) from contacting you. IF he (which could be she) calls or texts, do NOT answer. IF you see her at school, explain that he told you he was single and that you only talked at school, phone, text, FB, etc. Let the two of them sort out the rest.



 Helen0426
Joined: 6/2/2009
Msg: 17
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 4:13:37 PM
I agree with sending her the link to his POF profile and then blocking her, but I believe some social engineering is in order, too. Since you know that other people at the school also believe him to be single, you must be getting along with them okay. You need to talk to them - and quick, before she does or he does! - and tell at least one of them what happened. Make it clear that it's important this be kept confidential, because you feel so silly for being taken in, in order to ensure it gets around quickly.

For one thing, in case anyone else is considering him, it'll forewarn them.

But mainly, it's to protect your new reputation in this place. Because this is going to get around from someone's point of view, guaranteed. Best if you're the one controlling the story.
 aSydneyMale
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 18
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 4:25:30 PM

Did you know he was married before she called you?

If so- you already 'crossed' the line to slutdom a bit by being in contact with him...

Time to put the rusty halo down

Is there a problem with your reading and comprehension?

You must have missed this:

his POF profile has no picture and he states it is because he doesnt want any crazy people to come to his work, but really it is because he is MARRIED, now i have his psycho wife harassing me and accusing me of being a slut, but I NEVER TOUCHED her husband, he is the one cheating, his profile says single and he had every parent at the school even convinced he was a single dad............yet his facebook profile has pictures of him and his family, had i known his last name sooner i could have saved myself all of this grief,
 misszmsz
Joined: 5/31/2008
Msg: 19
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 4:37:55 PM
Alot of people who have cheating spouses know about it, or at least have some suspicion and rather than confront their partner, they accuse the person whom they think their spouse is cheating with.

Actually this situation happened to a friend of mine before facebook existed. The wife of the married man got the Child Protective Services to come out to her house and workplace at the grade school, to investigate my friend and her live-in boyfriend for child abuse or neglect.

Potential stalker alert, protect yourself by calling the authorities and blocking her from contacting you in any way, shape or form.
 Greyfeld
Joined: 1/11/2007
Msg: 20
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 5:48:29 PM

this makes me questions MEN who do not have pictures on their profiles because they are probably MARRIED, Ugly or GAME players.


Because men who aren't attractive enough for you should have the decency to let you know ahead of time, so you know beforehand not to waste time on their fugly ass, right?

I'm really freakin tired of "oh, you don't have a picture, you must be ugly, don't talk to me." I agree that I don't really want to talk to somebody without seeing what they look like, but I'm also not rude enough to believe that somebody has to be a certain level of attractiveness to talk to me.
 acuddler
Joined: 10/30/2009
Msg: 21
Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 5:53:32 PM
People at the school knew he was married. You didn't ask the right people...or, perhaps, anyone. Assume a guy is married, until you KNOW otherwise. Ask for his home address, so you can send him romantic cards, and such. If he won't give you his street address he is married...or in jail, and out temporarily on work release, and due back in stir later that night, or such. Assume the worst, and then prepare for it. Then you are covered. Send the wife in this case one email. Eall to her, then tell her that if she harrasses you any further you will go to the police, and charge her with: stalking, electronic stalking, harrassment, menacing, and sexual harrassment. Then she can have the fun of explaining to people how she got on a rgeistered sex offender list for harrassing another woman.
 SunnyTexas
Joined: 9/28/2006
Msg: 22
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:05:24 PM
Chrystal, I'm sorry this happened to you in a new town. It sucks, I know. But don't let it keep you down for long. There are good men here who have honest intentions. Just be careful. Now you know the signs and can make better choices.
 aSydneyMale
Joined: 5/16/2006
Msg: 23
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:09:03 PM

I'm really freakin tired of "oh, you don't have a picture, you must be ugly, don't talk to me." I agree that I don't really want to talk to somebody without seeing what they look like, but I'm also not rude enough to believe that somebody has to be a certain level of attractiveness to talk to me.

Well said. It shows a decided lack of maturity for someone who thinks they're 'all that' to disrespect and poke fun at somebody because of their looks.

I've only contacted women I've thought I'd have a reasonable chance of dating and I assume the women who've contacted me felt the same.

Most I found attractive, some I did not, but I didn't have this overwhelming desire to throw up and fire them a note saying 'How dare you contact me and aspire to date me, because you don't measure up to my lofty personal standards of perfection in a woman??!!'

I was happy a woman found me of sufficient interest to want to know more about me.
 green.apple
Joined: 8/20/2009
Msg: 24
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:21:37 PM

Hard to read and comment on this, since your original post is one long sentence. Periods and paragraphs are good things.


James Joyce calls it "stream of consciousness".

In this case " stream of bull"
 farscapeprincess
Joined: 4/28/2008
Msg: 25
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Married Man....now i have a wife harassing me
Posted: 1/7/2010 6:34:25 PM
There was a married man on here that was posing as divorced. The douche bag contacted me and we were e-mailing for a few days. Then the wife contacted me via this site when she found his POF page. She wasn't psycho and I told her in a phone call that I didn't want her husband. She was at least sane enough to realize it because she knew from his profile that everything was lies -- from his age to his marital status. In his case, he had a picture with his profile.
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