|Please Review My Profile|
Posted: 3/8/2010 5:38:06 AM
|Ok, well since you are a lawyer, I'm hoping you won't sue me for what I'm about to do to your profile|
First, get atleast 10-12 interests. Second, delete picture two and get a close up of your face with a smile(showing teetth, this is mucho important). Third, change your headline, it's what attracts attention as much as you. Fourth, change wanting children to undecided/open, this doesn't look bad and in the end if you don't want kids with a person you met on here, well atleast you can say you never said you did. Fifth, get a car!
This next stuff is JUST from your about me section.
Even though I am originally from NYC I have a more laid back west coast type of personality. I see myself making a career in NYC but don't see myself here indefinitely.
Cool, describe how you have a laid back personality, just saying that is a cliche. Also, by saying you don't see yourself in NY indefinitely could imply that you are looking only to meet a girl while you are there and then move and leave her high, dry, and possibly pregnant(yes, my mind works that way), so it can appear negative. Try clarifying that with elaboration of where you want to move and how soon/long from now.
My hobbies include: Traveling (especially Europe),going out in the city with friends (lower east side is prob my favorite area). Was also on the tennis team in college), trying new restaurants and going back to my favorite ones (i would have to say my fav food is sushi), cooking (my best friend was a pro french chef and taught me everything I know), movies, trashy tv (think Jersey Shore & Flavor of Love), reading (was a lit. major), and currency trading (what do you know about the carry trade?). I also enjoy going to the gym and running outside (love running in central park, don't understand how people can run for long distances on a treadmill).
Ok, let me just annihilate this part. Why do you like Europe(public voyeurism, culture, history, food, etc). What places on the east side? No one cares about what you did in college as for sports, just tell us about your education. What types of food do you like the most, and what's the best restaurant that serves it? Elabortae on cooking, something like, maybe I'll cook you a fabulous meal. What are your favorite types of movies? Those t.v. shows suck and are all about superficial people, sorry personal opinion, this could be seen as you LOVE drama(*hint hint* women freaking HATE drama!). What type of books do you read, the encyclopedia? No one cares about currency trading, and if they do, it's because they are hoping you will put alot of yours in their pockets, leave this out. Why do you like central park so much?
I am a big outdoors person. In the summer I love going to the beach, hiking, camping, white water rafting; in the winter mostly skiing/snowboarding and maybe a warm vacation if I get sick of the hitting the slopes. On your average weekend night you can find me out with my friends in the city, or even just keeping it low key and cuddling watching a movie.
Why the outdoors, you were a lit. major, I'd expect you to atleast use elaboration in some of your profile, GOD! Also, elaborate on ALL those hobbies. What are you doing in the city?
Through all of this self absorbed profile(you start everything with "I", comes off as arrogant and the "it's all about me" attitude), I didn't learn about what you want in a relationship, what you want in a woman, or how you act in a relationship. Now how the hell is a woman suppose to know if she's possibly your type if you haven't described what you want? Food for thought.
Hope this helps, Ron