Acen1
| | Joined: 9/18/2009
Msg: 1 | |
| | TimewastersPage 1 of 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) | Have been speaking to someone for a few weeks now, was hoping to meet them this weekend and they said they'd see if they were free for the afternoon.
My question is....why do people say something and then do something else as I asked if they were still free and they said they'd been out all night and got in at half 6 this morning, meaning she didn't fancy meeting up later.
Am I right to be annoyed at some people's attitude? I do wonder why they are on a website. This is not about pity, just people being honest and decent. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 11:25:15 AM |
as I asked if they were still free
a free woman? better off with john inman mate 
they said they'd been out all night and got in at half 6 this morning,
wonder what she was doing to make her tired???
I do wonder why they are on a website.
to keep them entertained while waiting for the soaps, better off giving her your number after a days emailing and say if your interested then txt/ring if not just say bye, simples. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 11:39:42 AM |
wonder what she was doing to make her tired???
making new friends using a convoluted manoeuvre. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 11:44:36 AM |
was hoping to meet them this weekend and they said they'd see if they were free for the afternoon.
To be fair to her, that's exactly what she did. When the day came, she wasn't free to see you.
Am I right to be annoyed at some people's attitude?
Yes, but not in this woman's case, as she hasn't displayed any 'attitude'.
This is not about pity, just people being honest and decent.
Could you please point out where she was dishonest, and indicate why you think she isn't 'decent'? | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 11:50:48 AM |
they said they'd see if they were free for the afternoon
It was at that point I'd have said "Don't worry chick I am too busy!"
If people cant make the time to meet up then they are obviously too
busy for a relationship. She seems to be having a good enough time
without meeting you OP, I'd forget it. I cant stand being "slotted" into
someones life. But then again I am the one who seems to have no chance.
So what do I know  | |
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Acen1
| | Joined: 9/18/2009
Msg: 6 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 11:55:34 AM | ZG....for the past 3 weeks she said she would meet.
Deleted my number by accident so couldn't text me. Tried to invite me out at about half an hour's notice when I wasn't online......so could say it's a bit like being given the run around.
I'm sure she appreciates your support though.
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 11:58:32 AM |
It was at that point I'd have said "Don't worry chick I am too busy!"
If people cant make the time to meet up then they are obviously too
busy for a relationship. She seems to be having a good enough time
without meeting you OP, I'd forget it
quote for truth. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:04:28 PM | | Often people on dating sites will have more than 1 person they're talking to at the same time and people will put a person "on hold" until they see how their preferred date goes. If your being messed around then they're just not that into you. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:09:53 PM | there are many weird and wonderful people in the world....just a shame that so many of the weird end up on here 
A guy mailed me a week or so ago "hi, hope that we can chat sometime". So I reply, he tries to IM me - that doesn't work so he sends s me his msn addy...I add him..see him on line...say hello......and nothing ...totally ignored...wtf? | |
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Carm0n
| | Joined: 11/21/2009
Msg: 10 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:09:59 PM | never expect anything from anyone on here till it happens | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:40:19 PM | | Sounds to me that she was keeping her options open, but not really into you, I'm afraid. Otherwise she would have been keen to make a definite arrangement on a day and at a time she knew she was free. I don't think it's that easy to delete a phone number without having that intention. If you had text each other she would have access to your number in her inbox and sent box...so also think that points to the fact that she wasn't really that bothered. To invite you anywhere, with half an hours notice is very much on impulse, and a little odd. I would chalk it up to experience, and forget her. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:44:25 PM |
ZG....for the past 3 weeks she said she would meet.
Deleted my number by accident so couldn't text me. Tried to invite me out at about half an hour's notice when I wasn't online......so could say it's a bit like being given the run around.
I'm sure she appreciates your support though.
And I, and probably others, would appreciate being given the full story before being berated by you for not knowing it!
How do you know she deleted your mobile number from her phone? She told you that via some other means, yes? OK, why didn't you forward it again? You did? So did she 'lose' it again??
And how can you claim to have been given the runaround when you admit that she emailed you in a bid to arrange a meet-up? It wasn't her fault that you didn't go online in time to see that email.
And when did she try and arrange that meet-up? It was obviously before this weekend, so that means that you have already 'missed' one opportunity to meet up with her.
The fact remains that she did not state that she would be seeing you today - she had simply said that she would see how she was fixed when the time came. This happens all the time, which is why I don't generally leave my arrangements to meet up until the day in question - Thursday is my preferred day, lol........ | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:49:12 PM | | I don't think the OP is the one berating anyone. | |
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Acen1
| | Joined: 9/18/2009
Msg: 14 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 12:51:10 PM | | Thanks Sally, what you've said makes a great deal of sense. | |
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Carm0n
| | Joined: 11/21/2009
Msg: 15 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 1:58:05 PM | Op, I recently agreed to meet someone, he was going to USA on business and was going to arrange it when he got back. So, in that week he was not online, but was the day he said he would be, he was on every few hours for an hour,( never mailed me). It took 4 days of that for him to mail me. I am not competing with other women, if thats how men play the game on here then I am not interested. I got a message simply saying, ' hello, how are you' ........I'm not here to play games with players, I blocked him...
I'm sure you will all tell me I'm naieve, and that I should expect them to be mailing others as thats what happens. Then I will not be meeting anyone else...
There are people on here who like to keep their options open, I steer clear of them. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 2:05:45 PM |
I recently agreed to meet someone, he was going to USA on business and was going to arrange it when he got back. So, in that week he was not online, but was the day he said he would be, he was on every few hours for an hour,( never mailed me). It took 4 days of that for him to mail me. I am not competing with other women, if thats how men play the game on here then I am not interested. I got a message simply saying, ' hello, how are you' ........I'm not here to play games with players, I blocked him.
So you reckon he was online when he was in the USA?
What's the problem? The guy who introduced me to pof rarely contacted women in England - he contacted women in California, where he worked for three months of the year, and didn't want to be alone in that time.
It is not reasonable of us to expect those with whom we are in contact to only be in contact with us, and the same applies the other way. I will go days, sometimes weeks, before getting back in touch with someone, even though we've both probably seen each other online during that period.
People get in touch when they are good and ready......you're free, of course, to block who you wish. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 2:06:09 PM |
My question is....why do people say something and then do something else as I asked if they were still free and they said they'd been out all night and got in at half 6 this morning, meaning she didn't fancy meeting up later.
'People' didn't say something then do something else. 'She' said she'd see if she was free, and turned out not to be so couldn't meet up.
Here's a thought, make a definite date, go to it, if she doesn't turn up then she's not interested, till then - if you don't understand her actions, ask her, 'cos we're less likely to know what she's thinking than she is.
Am I right to be annoyed at some people's attitude?
It's not some people's attitude, it's this woman's attitude, and if you're this peed off with her, I don't think dating is on the cards anyway, do you?
H.x | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 4:01:22 PM | The first thing that struck me is that she was out partying til 6.30am, maybe she still needs to get something out of her system but if they can't make a suitable time to meet you then hardly likely they will have time for a relationship either. Being at someone's beck and call aint for me Im afraid and if she wants to string people along whilst she is partying then I think your on a hiding to nothing OP :)
Relationships should be about people making time for each other and meeting half way. You can do better OP and deserve better :) | |
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Pud78
| | Joined: 4/29/2010
Msg: 19 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 4:12:49 PM | My thoughts were similar to aitche's, try to communicate with her and not to second guess her but be direct amd if she is evassive or not forthcoming then move on.
There was nothing confirmed or set in stone and without knowing the person or anything about her it is very hard to judge her. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/20/2010 10:18:21 PM | I agree with pud78.
I am quite philosophical about these situations. In the OP's
position, I would assume that the female's interest in me
was no more than lukewarm - or that it had become such
as a result of her being in contact with others
she was attracted to.
The more females or males you are in contact with, the
more indecisive you can be on who you want to meet.
It is very common on these sites. | |
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Carm0n
| | Joined: 11/21/2009
Msg: 21 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/21/2010 12:53:23 AM | I did explain that he was not on line while in USA, ( 'So, in that week he was not online,' )
He had said he would mail me to arrange to meet on the sat, he was too busy mailing others on here and mailed me on tues. Theres nothing like, putting someone in their place!!
It may be reality that some people keep their options open and like to ignore people who they have arranged things with, but I will not play that game.
I am now chatting to someone who IS only chatting to me. So, don't tell me everyone do's it, some people are genuine on here. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/21/2010 1:06:03 AM |
I recently agreed to meet someone, he was going to USA on business and was going to arrange it when he got back. So, in that week he was not online, but was the day he said he would be, he was on every few hours for an hour,( never mailed me). It took 4 days of that for him to mail me.
Well, he did as he said he would:
He had said he would mail me to arrange to meet on the sat, he was too busy mailing others on here and mailed me on tues.
If he left it four days before contacting you, that means he arrived back on Friday - it's quite possible that the Saturday in question was going to be the following Saturday, given how knackered he might have felt after the trip and flight. So, when he got in touch on Tuesday, he was doing precisely as he had stated before he went away.
I am now chatting to someone who IS only chatting to me
And you know that because??
EDIT
I know because he hasnt been on here!
It may be a surprise to men, but we do know, but we do know if people are online or not, thats what favourits are for! I am on for the forums and chat to a couple of friends, which he knows about before you ask why I am on when he isn't.
Ah, you meant 'emailing' and IMing on pof!
Have you not heard of telephones?
People use them to chat to other people, and no-one else need be aware of that.
The fact is, it is impossible to state with any certainty that someone is only in touch with one particular person.
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Carm0n
| | Joined: 11/21/2009
Msg: 23 | |
| Timewasters
Posted: 6/21/2010 1:13:22 AM | no, it was that sat he was suppose to conntact me,and while your sticking up for him saying he was sooo tired, bless him, why was he managing to chat to others for at least 4hrs daily?
I'm not arguing with you. If thats the way you treat people on here, fine, alot do, but also alot don't. So, I dont have to put up with it
I know because he hasnt been on here!
It may be a surprise to men, but we do know, but we do know if people are online or not, thats what favourits are for! I am on for the forums and chat to a couple of friends, which he knows about before you ask why I am on when he isn't. | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/21/2010 2:18:24 AM |
It may be a surprise to men, but we do know, but we do know if people are online or not, thats what favourits are for! I am on for the forums and chat to a couple of friends, which he knows about before you ask why I am on when he isn't.
Doesn't really apply to those of us who leave their PC turned on with the POF website up :/
I've had this before, ive been told I was online when I was actually down the pub lol | |
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| Timewasters
Posted: 6/21/2010 3:05:45 AM | I'm seriously confused about this site...what people want from it and if there
are that many genuine people.
It just feels like a cattle market most of the time...
and personally playing games isn't for me.
But The options available are enticing for some I guess...?
Blah...i'm having an off day! | |
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