| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/18/2005 5:18:15 PM | | Seems like there is a trend on POF where men (I don't look at the profiles of too many ladies, so can't comment on women) are deciding not to post their pictures. It sure makes communication a lot nicer to know who you are responding to...know what I mean? | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/18/2005 5:39:22 PM | | I'd imagine that the thought process is, if someone's interested enough to write back when you don't have pics up they actually want to get to know you. I wish I'd tried that approach, since it seems my pic isn't good enough to respond to. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/18/2005 5:43:28 PM | many of them ask their wives or girlfriend to take nice pictures. by asking few pointed questions the wife or the g/f finds out that the pix were going to be posted on POF so the they throw the camera to the dog.
no picture========>hiding something from someone ( wife, g/f, boss, family, friends...the IRS, the fbi/cia........) | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/18/2005 6:31:34 PM | | I did a "test" on another site, and found out I did not get 10x the response by posting a picture. Maybe I'm down right frightening but I've never been told so. I do not have hardly any pictures of myself and I do not like taking them because of obvious esteem issues. If I make it past the first chat session with a woman I will send a picture but they always want more. Then add in all the outdated pictures, phony, touched up and stolen pictures I've come across I really see no point. | |
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gc33
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Joined: 6/11/2005
Msg: 5 | |
| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/18/2005 10:30:53 PM | | I originally didn't post my pic for many different reasons. Then I started chatting with someone I really liked and I felt nervous about meeting her. Would she even be talking to me if she knew what I looked like. I would much rather start a communication with someone who knows what I look like, that way I know her interest is genuine. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 6:41:37 AM | I don't send an email to someone unless they have a pic up, so I feel it's important to post them of myself. There needs to be some sort of physical chemistry, right? This is a dating site after all.
I've gotten flamed by some women and called shalloe when I respond that I'd like to see a pic. But why would you invest the time and energy into developing a relationship with someone when you didn't know what they looked like? Then if there's no spark when you meet, you feel like an ass because everything is great for a friendship, you're just not attracted to them. That's happened to me twice before and while I'm still friends with each of these two people, I feel like I hurt them because there was no physical attraction. So that's why I now ask to see a pic, it's only fair. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 7:34:03 AM | rafael wrote:
I wish I'd tried that approach, since it seems my pic isn't good enough to respond to.
If you're referring to your current picture, the girl there with you is probably a bit of a turn off for many of the ladies out there. Gives the feeling that you might not be the faithful type. Even though it's probably an old picture, some are going to get the impression that here you are with your lady and you're out looking for another. I'd recommend just putting up a picture of yourself, even if you need to take a new one. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 9:20:35 AM | If someone contacts me that doesn't have a photo, I ask for one right away. If they continue to write me without adding one, then I just delete them. If I can't see whom I'm chatting with, I don't chat... Why would you when there are so many you can chat with whom you can see...
I just think it's a waste of time/laziness not to put up a photo... and thus, do I really want to talk to someone who is either a procrastinator or lazy? Probably not. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 9:42:46 AM | I feel more comfortable talking to people who have pics up. then I at least have an idea of who im talking to.
Lucy | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 9:57:37 AM |
I've gotten flamed by some women and called shalloe when I respond that I'd like to see a pic.
Sounds like those women may have been using an attack-first strategy as a means of defense. It just seems "fair" to put up a photo, doesn't it?
SecondBestDad, I'm going to go out on a limb and say these no-photo ladies most likely took your photos into consideration before contacting you. How could they not have? Meow!
My first thought when contacted by a "no-photo" guy is "married," or at least "hiding something." Why start off on a suspicious first step? | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 10:19:52 AM | | It's the only picture I have with my best friend who passed away recently. If some woman is that insecure to think that a photo where we're showing off tattoos we got together is indicative of me being a cheater, I want nothing to do with her anyway. I do appreciate the advice though, but I'd rather honor my friend for the time being. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 4:26:26 PM | Photo is a requirement with me, I got mine up. I even state as much. It is recent too...
Come guys and girls the clothes and hair styles are a dead give-away when the photo is 20 years old. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 8:24:17 PM | | Well....everyone hates to admit they are so shallow that a photo matters....but good Lord...it just DOES! | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/19/2005 8:42:41 PM | | I agree... to the point where I think I really don't like talking with someone unless I can "see" them too.. Come on, it's not fair. I've put myself out there.. you can at least meet me half way :) | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 1:00:02 PM | | Women incessantly tell us guys that looks don't matter. So, why do you need a pic if looks don't matter? | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 3:36:51 PM | @CountIbli I think looks matter, but only to a point. Of course, looks matter more to some than to others. In these posts, I keep running across the word "fair." Great pic, BTW. You look "heavenly."  | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 4:00:51 PM | | I totally agree secondbest...I admit up front that chemistry is very important to me! | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 4:05:42 PM | | For me, no picture is due to slight embarrassment. Like it or not, there is still somewhat of a stigma attached to this type of dating. Sure, we all say we are too busy to find a date, but in reality, people still look at us as people who can't get dates through the normal channels. I personally think these kinds of services are great, but I don't feel comfortable putting my feelings/personal stats online for coworkers/aquaintances/ex-girlfriends to criticize, laugh about, or use as fodder for gossip. I'll send a picture to anyone after we've exchanged an e-mail or two and I feel comfortable with them. So please, ladies, don't exclude the ads that don't contain pictures. You may be missing a great guy. I promise not to disappoint you. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 6:27:15 PM | | Yeah but it is really hard to imagine yourself seeing someone possibly in person if you can't even see them online. And half the time people with no pics have no good eye catchers in their profiles to get you to want to talk to someone you can't see. I donno about anyone else, but I am not going to start talking to someone I am not physically attracted to and get my hopes up that I am as physically as I am mentally attracted to them because you just aren't most times. I've also gotten the exaggerated pics where people put their pics from four years ago when they were hot as hell and now they are balding and gained 20 lbs. Just be yourself... faking it is worse than no pic at all I think | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 6:28:16 PM | | and the line, "I dont have any pics on my computer" is a big crock or something because it is 2005, you have so many ways of getting a picture online- | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 6:34:36 PM | | Not for anything, but there are many reasons why we don't find dates through other channels. You can be anywhere from 17 to 80 and be a great person, but just not have the situation at hand. I mean- I am 20. that is the awkward not in highschool anymore, focused on school/work, and not yet old enough to do the bar thing so how do I meet people? And just as anyone else, time is a big problem. Plus, I donno how many people go up to people at random while out, i'm not shy, and most people aren't, but it is that awkwardness of rejection. Atleast on here if someone that u find attractive doesnt find u attractive you can just say ok... | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 7:58:23 PM | I will not send an intro letter to anyone without offering my picture from the start.I also have never rejected a request for a pic.
1-not all people feel safe having their photos displayed to the world
2-anyone can do anything with your picture on the web
3-If you receive mail from a no photo admirer,jusk ask for one before you care to go further
4-If you admire a profile without a pic---just ask,most will oblidge
5-This is a free site so you dont have to go all out because you paid 30 bucks for 1 month
Men have read countless complaints from ladies who think men are just after sex and they get tons of mail from folks who like there hot picture and never even take the time to read about there interests.Reverse that by flaunting your interests first THEN make the surprise your photo.
All men are after sex.
The finest are after love and sex.
I'll claim the lot of the finest. | |
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| What's Up With NO PHOTOS?
Posted: 7/20/2005 11:08:58 PM | @legal_catch
I really like your perspective! You sure seem to have a head on your shoulders.
@OT: The only reason it took me three weeks to get a pic up, is that only know one person with a camera! Then, when I saw them for the first time in a month and a half, I was tired, unshaven, and hesitant to put up old party pics from this winter. Oh well, I guess you win some, you lose some. | |
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