Roaul
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Joined: 4/14/2004
Msg: 1 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 2:43:42 PM | i have been in this forum a short time but i seem to notice that there is a lot of threads regaurding weight issues.does it really matter if someone weighs 75lbs or 240+ if you feel for that person that should be all that really matters.
thats my rant over with. | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 2:54:48 PM | | In a perfect world it should'nt. But there is so much emphasis on having the super model body and the six pack abs today. Everyone is caught up in the craze and won't settle for anything less. I personally have preferences but will bend them if a lady has other outstanding qualities that make uo for what she lacks in other areas. And i'm sure you and everyone else has preferences for an ideal match. And you kidding yourself if you say otherwise. | |
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Roaul
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Joined: 4/14/2004
Msg: 3 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 3:02:02 PM | thanks chuck surei have prefs and i am happy to list them.
1)she is happy in herself.
2)she is real.
3)she is breathing. | |
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Roaul
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Joined: 4/14/2004
Msg: 5 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 3:18:15 PM | teeth they are helpful so she can eat a meal i would cook for her.
hair there could be reasons why she has little or none.her favourite hairstyle might be very short or medical reasons for none.though my origional intension for this thread was does size really matter,is it not the person who counts more? your a cool guy chuck. | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 3:23:00 PM | | Thanks buddy your not so bad yourself...My point is not only size but other factors matter as well to some people...but your one of the rare people who finds beauty in everyone and is not superficial the majority of us are. Good for you raoul | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 4:22:44 PM | | I freely admit that I do not have the perfect body...but I like the one that God gave me. If I didn't have the marks that show up with kids, then I would not have my two angels, if I didn't have laugh lines around my eyes, then that would mean I had a sad life...I prefer to take what comes at me, and make the best of it. I don't require the guys I date to be such and such weight, or age, as long as they take care of themselves and are comfortable enough with themselves to be honest with me. I do have a problem with someone who immediately begins to try to change me and mold me into what they want. I think it should be based on the inside of the person as much as the outside simply because looks fade and you have to have something going for you other than beauty. But, reality is that a lot of people decide who they want to date based on the looks of the other person. It bites, but that is the way it is most of the time....by the way...Chuck, I've got all my teeth...the better for nibbling..;) | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 4:41:39 PM | Roual, You are someone very special..Not only should looks not matter, or age.
Personally, I'd rather love the one I'm with inside and out, than just count on the outter package to tide me through. Looks come and go! The inner person is the only constant.
If you can love them from the inside out, you've got it made, buddy.
Says gumby from Field. | |
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Roaul
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Joined: 4/14/2004
Msg: 10 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 5:54:36 PM | to the ladies and chuck who have answered firstly thank-you for your compliments and your insights.i guess i do also have a dreamers veiw on this matter but it is also what i believe in.there is such beauty in each person if only we would look deep inside.
@ chuck thanks for explaining what you meant by the fess up.we're cool i took no offence. | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 6:17:22 PM | It would B nice if this wasn't true. But it is. I don't have the prefect body either. Even with said... I search 4 what is inside. But I would B lying if I said I wasn't looking 4 someone attractive. I get upset w/ the idea that others don't give me a chance. Hell I'm not unattractive, but then I also have to say and admitt that I probably do the same thing at times. Great topic!
Have a great day to you ALL.
Sami  | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 12 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 6:36:35 PM | | sincerity and honesty are two very attractives quality on a women...i love you and your name fits..lol | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 8:08:43 PM | Thanks... I always tell the truth... even when it can hurt me... I don't want to live life afraid of things or people because I was scared. Thanks... a lot for the kind words.
Have a great day Chuck!
Sami | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 8:44:49 PM | | you know, I neglected to tell you that you are an incredible person if you truly feel this way. Most people go for the superficial qualities and it is really great to see someone who states that what he feels for the person should be all that matters. So, just to let you know...I am impressed by that, and I am sure a lot of others are also. | |
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xchuck
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Joined: 6/11/2004
Msg: 16 | |
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LadyO
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Joined: 8/26/2004
Msg: 18 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 8:57:52 PM | As Foamy, Lord and Master of all says "Be proud to be the fat **stard that you are"...Foamy is the squirrel from 'illwillpress'
I am 5'6, and 225lbs. I'm fat. I...am...fat. I don't have an issue with it. Ok, sometimes I do. It just seems everyone else around me does...that's their problem. NOT MINE. I'm happy, that's all that should matter.
If I weighed 125lbs I'd be the same person. There's just more of me to cuddle up to now..which apparently no one wants to do anyways. So bleh....
To me, weight and height and such don't REALLY matter. So long as you take care of yourself. You may say I dont take care of myself, but then you wouldn't know me. I eat healthy, I get a moderate amount of exercise with my job as a Daycare provider and I'm happy with who I am. If you're 230lbs and happy as you are and you take care of yourself then that's all that should matter.
Unfortunately, as a people we tend to be judgemental without meaning to be. Which causes the stigmas that are blatant around the world in regards to looks. Looks are important, don't get me wrong...anyone who says that they aren't important even for the first conversation is bullsh*tting you.
Looks is what gets you interested in the person in the first place.
Trust me, if a guy was wearing torn jeans, long greasy tangled hair, facial hair that hasn't been shaved or trimmed in a year, with grit under his nails and yellow teeth, it wouldn't matter if he was the most brilliant guy in the world, I doubt I'd be overly willing to talk to him.
~ladyo | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 9:41:37 PM | Odd comment here. People keep saying what sound like funny numbers to me with regard to height and weight. I'm 5'6 and weight 150 lbs. From the numbers everyone talks about that makes me sound 25 lbs overweight. I'm definately not. Maybe I could lose 5 but not more than that. If I were 125 I'd be emaciated. When I was 145 lbs I had a couple of family members worried that I wasn't eating.
I'd like to know where people come up with numbers for expected weight. They sound pretty unrealistic to me. | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/1/2004 10:50:58 PM | | roaul, yeah it does matter to me. If the physical specs are off by reason of excess or not enough, the turn-off cannot be reversed by any Yak whatsoever. Its a physical impression, and its either pleasing or not. Each to his own. | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/2/2004 12:47:19 AM | Yes, it does matter if someone is 240+ pounds. That is obesity and there is no excuse for it, except for, in rare cases, medical conditions. Anyone who allows themselves to balloon to 240+ pounds has no respect for themselves or their health. If a person can't properly care for themselves, how could they ever hope to properly care for someone else.
W | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/2/2004 1:32:34 AM | Hows about if someone looks great in you perception but smokes so much there health is at risk. Does that mean they don't take care of themselves & could never properly take care of anyone else. I ask you all this is there such a thing as the perfect person, don't we all have something that makes us non attractive to someone. Don't get me wrong I think we all have our own perception of what is attractive & that's usually our first attraction to another person. But as has already been said looks don't last forever & unfortnate an accident can change your looks in a second. Judge not or thou shall be judged! | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/2/2004 1:59:39 AM | Yes, a person who smokes is not attractive. They are putting their health at risk for no reason, and I have a problem with that. An alcoholic is not attractive -- trust me, I am a recovering alcoholic (and an ex-smoker) -- and they are putting their health at risk. I am SOOO tired of the "Oraph Syndrome" where they say, "You go girl (or guy)"... be proud of yourself for being 100 pounds overweight and at risk of stroke. If you are grossly overweight, for anything other than medical reasons, you have nothing to be proud of.
Of course nobody is perfect, and there is so much "wrong" with the world that even if we try to do the right things (eating the right foods, etc, etc,) anything can happen. A car accident could scar us for life. A disease could leave us without a leg, an arm, or a breast. That, to me, doesn't make a person less attractive. It's when people make lifestyle choices that lead them to obesity, or alcoholism, or whatever that make them less attractive to the opposite (or same) sex and then complain that nobody sees their "inner beauty."
I'm just suggesting that they may not have as much inner beauty as they think they do or they would take care of themselves a little better.
W | |
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LadyO
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Joined: 8/26/2004
Msg: 24 | |
| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/2/2004 9:17:58 AM | I was the victim of an alcoholic boyfriend. I say "was" because I have since gotten over it and peeled away the scars that it should have left me.
Someone who smokes is not taking care of themselves. They are voluntarily poisoning their body with chemicals that include, but are not limited to, formaldehyde, Urethane, Ammonia, and Hydrogen Cyanide.
Now, smoking and killing yourself slowly would be all fine and dandy if you were not risking your partners health, or your families. By smoking you are disrespecting our right to a healthy lifestyle. You're inflicting upon us chemicals that include the above and many more. Making second hand smoke as deadly if not more so than smoking to begin with.
To the person that said 240+ is obese. I will agree with you but only briefly.
I've done the conversions, I've done the math. For my height, lifestyle, and metabolic rate 150lbs would be obese for me. What do you think 220lbs is?
Obese meaning that my BMI, (Body Mass Index) would be above a 30.
While is obese in 90% of the cases, there are those that are 240lbs for a certain reason. Take professional wrestlers, or any other strength orientated occupation. Also, take medical disorders. When I worked in the extended care hospital down the road, there was a lady with hydrocephalus, which is "water on the brain". It starts at an early age and causes the skull to bulge out and grow very large.
This woman, whose name was Cynthia, was about 32 years of age and looked like she was 90. Her head was massive, she couldn't move it by herself, nor could she sit up normally because the weight of it alone would more than likely injure her neck. She was strapped into a specialized chair. On top of having hydrocephalus, she had several other medical and mental disorders. She was a down syndrome baby, from what I could gather looking at her, and she had from what I saw on the doctors report, a double masectomy. Meaning, both breasts were surgically removed.
Now, this woman was about 5'9, from what I could guess. And her weight was probably in the 300lb range. She was overweight, but because of her condition there was nothing she can do about it.
Now, aside from medical conditions and lifestyle choices, people have to think on genetics. Many individuals believe that this is a mere grasp at straws, but it boils down to something you are born with.
Take myself for example. My mother is overweight. My father is overweight. My grandmother is overweight. My uncle is overweight. My grandfather, though not obese, was overweight. My great aunt was overweight (400lbs at 5'9), my great grandfather was overweight after coming out of the army.
I have a wide pelvis. I've already been told that by the doctor. My frame cannot handle being "tiny" because physically I'll NEVER fit into a size 2.
Am I taking care of myself by being overweight? Well, if I wasn't doing anything about it then no. You could say I was not taking care of myself. However, do I allow myself to get bigger? No. I've stayed at my current weight for over a year.
Do I exercise, of course I do. You try packing around two kids in your arms at any random moment of the day, going up two flights of stairs a total of 30 times a day, moving furniture, building forts, chasing the dog and shovelling snow (now that it's winter) and that will give you a good workout.
Could I do more? Sure. But the problem I face is "when"? I work from 8 am - 5 pm then I have to get in a minimum of 5 hours of studying done just to stay on time with my plans. Of course, I'm planning to take some of the children in my daycare out for a walk today, and if they all have snowsuits or even warm clothes, we can play outside in the yard.
But there's no physical or logical way I can get to the gym or out for a run for an hour every day. Or even three times a week. My education and bettering of myself by getting a $20 an hour job which I dont have to go to if I dont WANT to, comes before making myself a size or two smaller just so a guy will like me.
Men, are not THAT high on my priority list. Even if I do have a profile here on PoF...
~Much thanks,
-LadyO | |
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| does anyone feel the same as me.
Posted: 11/2/2004 10:06:57 AM | | WOw so only size six, non-smokers, with no bad habits need to apply? Guess that rules out 99% of the people on this website. | |
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