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Show ALL Forums  > Ask A Girl  > Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?      Home login  
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 c_deyoung
Joined: 7/12/2011
Msg: 1
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?Page 1 of 1    
Really. Okay, here's the thing. Women will message me, I'll send a message back, then we might exchange a couple of other messages and then they just move on completely. I don't know if it's my profile, my height, or what.

It's weird, too, because I was talking to this one chick who texted me and I texted her... then all of a sudden she lost interest completely. One worded responses, etc. However, the next day she clicked "YES" on "MEET ME". I tried to chat with her again, but she declined my chat. I know it's not me, I'm an attractive guy. It can't be the profile, it's not as boring as some I've read. It might be my height.

Seriously... are women just turned off by the fact that I'm 5'5? I've been getting a lot of messages from women, but whenever I try and talk to them, they don't want anything to do with me anymore... and it's the weirdest thing.
 forumfishie
Joined: 9/17/2009
Msg: 2
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:01:54 PM
It has to be the height
why do you say it's the weirdest thing?

Most men want skinny women
Most Women want tall men

It's superficial but it's true
But you might find someone who doesn't mind
having short children with you

It can happen

"I can guarantee that if I put my height as something like 6'0, I'd get a hell of a lot more responses"

Yes, I agree, you would.

Same as women saying they are #40 lighter
 statesshapes
Joined: 6/11/2011
Msg: 3
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:06:56 PM
I'm confused. How can this be about height? Don't they see your height listed on your profile before they ever contact you? How would it be not an issue, then an issue? Makse no sense. Something else is the problem, even if you are under 6 feet.
 c_deyoung
Joined: 7/12/2011
Msg: 4
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:07:43 PM
I can guarantee that if I put my height as something like 6'0, I'd get a hell of a lot more responses. Haha. I found a relationship on here once before. Well, whatever. Looks like I am doomed to find a woman on here again.
 c_deyoung
Joined: 7/12/2011
Msg: 5
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:09:15 PM
Well, I don't know what else could possibly be the problem. I try to keep the conversation going, ask them about themselves more than talk about myself, etc. All I can say is that I have not been successful with hardly any women that have contacted me. Really. They contact me, then stop talking to me altogether.
 MsMuscleChick
Joined: 5/31/2011
Msg: 6
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:16:54 PM
Age bracket and lack of photos, maybe height. Maybe add more photos and make your profile a little more exciting. However, at your age or close to it will be a lot of nonsense because a lot on here are not serious.

I know technology is hip now but at your age, my ass was out and about meeting people. Like in person.
 c_deyoung
Joined: 7/12/2011
Msg: 7
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:19:25 PM
Yes, I know what you mean. I've always been better at talking in person than online, to be honest. Maybe online dating just isn't for me. Maybe I just need to get out there and do it the old fashion way.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 8
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Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:19:56 PM
Chances are it's that they are getting an impression before contacting you that they realize isn't the same after talking. That and generally, talking back and forth is supposed to be about finding out what you want to know so you can decide to keep talking, or move on. It's a natural weeding out process that in some cases will mean someone will discontinue contact.
 c_deyoung
Joined: 7/12/2011
Msg: 9
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 6:26:51 PM
I don't know what they could possibly be getting the impression of after talking with me. I keep the conversation light hearted and casual. I don't talk too much (in fact, sometimes I probably don't talk enough), I'm funny and make them laugh, I don't get too personal, I keep the conversation going... but, eventually it just dies down. :\
 casey0413
Joined: 10/27/2009
Msg: 10
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 7:10:37 PM
If things die down after talking with them, so be it. It happens to me all the time, and I'm not complaining. It's part of the weeding process. Stop whining.
 Morning_Face
Joined: 5/26/2010
Msg: 11
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 7:59:38 PM
It's all about pictures here. If you think different you will dating in a very small pool on here. Your picture is not of your face in black and white. Put several flattering (but not deceiving) pictures up. They will be useful.
 _zebra
Joined: 4/3/2011
Msg: 12
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 8:18:36 PM
Hey, man. you ain't the only one in this boat. I've had great conversations with a hand full of women on here & even had a couple of them interested in meeting (initially, at least) but then as soon as specifics started coming up as far as actually trying to set a time or even get a phone number (although the majority of them didn't even stick around this long), they just quit talking.

Now I'm 5' 8", which ain't much taller than you, but then again, most women I've talked to are around 5', so I doubt they really feel like they're dwarfing me.

Maybe your solution can shed some light on mine...
 c_deyoung
Joined: 7/12/2011
Msg: 13
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 8:52:38 PM
Yep, this same exact thing happened to me, too. I don't think the picture really has anything to do with it... 'cause I had a colour one up before and had the same replies. However, women will talk to me and I'll talk back, and as soon as I do, the conversation goes a little something like this...

"so how's your day been?"
"ok"
"just okay, huh?"
"yup"

Some women are just plain boring on here, I have to say.
 bugse
Joined: 8/23/2008
Msg: 14
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Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 9:15:57 PM
If you read the forums, (search on IM), a lot of women don't like the IM feature, find it intrusive.
There have been problems with the MEET ME feature (seach on Meet me), women and men are indicating yes/maybe to meet me without understanding how the feature works.
If there have been mails back and forth and they stop, the forums suggest that you have waited too long to meet, or you have said something that was a deal breaker for the woman.
Search and read the forums, they are full of answers to questions like this.
 Basiate
Joined: 11/2/2010
Msg: 15
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Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 10:07:59 PM
DO:
Send a couple messages
Ask to meet within 2 - 3 days
Meet
Set a date if there is an attraction

STOP:
Over messaging on POF
Texting
Waiting a week and expecting her to still be interested.

Also realize that after a couple messages she may just not want to meet you.

Just because you use more words in your text conversations does not mean what you had to say was more interesting. You were playing a text game hun..You tried to lead her into a conversation by asking her how her day was and she did not play it. If you want to talk, then call her. If its so important that you text..then why not send a quick text asking if she has time for you to call her real quick? But PLEASE, have something to talk about prepared. Nothing worse than to stop what Im doing to answer the phone and have dead silence on the other end.

I swear, sometimes you younger guys think all you have to do is stretch your self out and the girls will just come running to you. Work on attracting women and stop blaming women for not being attracted to you.
 xx_JJ_xx
Joined: 7/2/2011
Msg: 17
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/21/2011 11:43:52 PM
Personally I get bored if it's always 'how has your day been'
Plus I do find sometimes that one day you can be having a conversation about something and the next day the man will start all over again with 'how has your day been'. I've never understood that one...?

Plus a few messages is just that..to see what kind of feel you get for someone.
Just because someone is replying doesn't mean that they will end up going on a date with you.
 motown cowgirl
Joined: 6/30/2010
Msg: 18
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/22/2011 7:26:43 AM
Some women are just plain boring on here, I have to say.

i think some of them probably came to the same conclusion about your conversation starters, kiddo.

they are merely mirroring your boring questions with boring answers, because they think your entire approach to having a chat is boring, and the LAST thing they want to talk about is how their day has been.

don't go around asking women how their day has been.... there is a method to small-talk madness and asking people you don't know about their day AIN'T IT. "how has your day been" is entirely too personal.... but it is FAUX personal, because we KNOW you don't really give a shit about how our day has been. what do you want them to do, unload on you about the mundane details of their personal lives and sucky bosses and mean co-workers or the promotion they just got? i don't think so!... so the whole question comes off as WEIRD. you are putting people on a weird spot by asking about their day, so don't do that. so instead of having a boring discussion based on your boring question, i can see exactly why they answer the way they do.... that's not a conversation they want to have.

if you want to engage in small talk with people to get to know them better, you need to make it an easy/interesting but not a tedious/boring conversation to have. talk about the weather... that's pretty standard... how is your garden/hair/makeup holding up in this heat???... or have some chit-chat about something on their profile, and get to know them better that way, because those are the things they actually put out there as conversation starters.
 littleinsomniac
Joined: 11/26/2010
Msg: 19
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Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/22/2011 7:34:20 AM
"some women are just plain boring on here."

It's true actually - it's harder to get women to talk lol. Can't do much about them, but you can try to do more from your side and possibly encourage the chattier ones to REALLY talk back.

Some icebreakers would be good, like, 'Gosh you're kinda quiet, cat got your tongue?'
or 'Got any plans for tonight? Or just sit around being lazy like me?'
or 'I bet guys are all over your profile.'



By the way you are pretty handsome, I reckon you should get a better picture up because I think a bit of variety counts :)
 MusicalFish1
Joined: 6/19/2011
Msg: 20
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/23/2011 12:44:24 PM
Alright Fella

This is how I see it....

You message someone, and then message them again, as ladies are advised to email a bit first to establish person they are speaking to isnt a nutter. Only one problem with this site and this process as i see it. You end up with nothing much to say. If they have read your profile and like you, really a first date should be arranges straight away, strike while the iron is hot!!

In short, no pun intended as im 5ft 8ins, Dont be too disheartened its not you, just the whole process on here

Paul
 unclezeus
Joined: 5/12/2011
Msg: 21
Women talk to me, then stop talking to me?
Posted: 7/23/2011 12:51:39 PM
Don't worry about it. Keep trying.
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