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 Dorkvader27
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 1
Have you dated someone that was OCD?Page 1 of 1    
Not someone that you thought or suspected was OCD but someone that had been diagnosed OCD.

I'm curious how it went? What were the difficulties of it? What were the benefits of it? What advice would offer to someone who is OCD?
 Magina314
Joined: 1/9/2011
Msg: 2
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/12/2011 11:31:53 AM
Everybody is infected with OCD, some more than others.

It's the fact that you want something done your way, and you won't have it done any other way. Or it makes you feel more comfortable when it's done the way that you want, SO naturally you won't have it done any other way.

Such as:
"I want this picture frame CENTERED in the MIDDLE of the HALLWAY."
(Some will literally pull out the pencils, measuring tape, and the level)

"I want my Car parked in 1ST GEAR / NEUTRAL / REVERSE"

Maybe you haven't noticed it until now, but OCD is primarily a virus that forces somebody to act upon their opinion.
 forumfishie
Joined: 9/17/2009
Msg: 3
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/12/2011 11:38:25 AM
I dated a guy with OCD for about 3 months
It was awesome
His house was desinfected, cleaner than a hospital
But
It took him a couple of hours to leave the house to go anywhere too
he had lots of rituals, checking appliances weren't on and flipping light switches, washing hands etc.
I never picked him up, just asked him to call me ONCE he was at the place we were going, it could be anytime whitin 3 hours

It wasn't bad for me
I just felt bad he was wasting time doing all that
we broke up because he was an a$$ hole not because he had OCD
 *army mom*
Joined: 6/9/2009
Msg: 4
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/12/2011 11:56:54 AM
Yep, and that's why I'm going to start requiring my potential boyfriends to take the MMPI ...

My ex had OCD ... he said it was "mild" ... it wasn't. He constantly called to ask me if I turned off the coffee pot before I left for work (he left before me). He had a "path" at Wal-Mart that he could never waver from. He was also a germophobe, meaning he had to take a shower immediately after sex. You can guess this made me feel like Typhoid Mary.

I can't honestly say I got any benefit from his OCD, other than learning I should run like hell if I ever encounter it again.
 sportsgirl7700
Joined: 5/22/2009
Msg: 5
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/12/2011 12:15:27 PM
My former best friend has diagnosed OCD.

Her husband divorced her largely in part to the OCD.

She cannot maintain a long relationship as they all tire of her and move on.

She is more of the "my way or no way" type and the "my sh*t don't stink" attitude.

Notice I said former best friend...
 sunny_in_therain
Joined: 7/4/2011
Msg: 6
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/13/2011 10:51:53 AM
yes three dates. and that was pretty tolerant.
He had a storage unit full of new and extremely old clothes on racks (at least 6 racks with nylon covers) He had an entire wall of shoes and sneakers, all neatly placed in their boxes and organized by style color and type, 3 bins of socks Close to 100 pair) all exactly the same style color and folded and placed in the bin like soldiers the gray band facing up. about 15 stacks of towels all the same size, white only folded the same. his hair looked like a cabbage patch kid, spiked waves all standing perfectly straight up. he had a fetish he talked about endlessly. he washed his hands constantly and picked at his nails. When he dropped by his storage unit to pick up something, he refused to take me home because he found a pc of mouse dirt on one of his towels, he frantically took the entire storage area apart. And I mean frantic! I kept asking him to take me home since I had to be home when my daughter was dropped off from her dads, and he ignored me totally ..obsessed with the turd. i was desperate to get home so I told him, he shouldnt be touching anything in that room without gloves, that mouse poops can make you deathly sick! oh nooo! grins..I was home in ten minutes flat. whew
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 7
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/13/2011 11:32:39 AM
It's the fact that you want something done your way, and you won't have it done any other way. Or it makes you feel more comfortable when it's done the way that you want, SO naturally you won't have it done any other way.

Great way to put it. And yeah, we all have our OCD pieces. I think it's a problem when there's too many of them, and they conflict with the other person... or it blocks one's rational thought. Not "weird" things that can be a bit cute and isolated... but when it turns into many little things in which what they "need" to do is no different than what they "want" to do on a series of obscure things.

My last LTR-GF was like that. She never realized to what extent it was, and had most of her weekdays tied to chores that she herself wanted to do herself, and pretty much in the same exact order regardless of how much more of the day it would take up to do so. It became that her comfort-zone on many specific things to do, trivial or semi-important, were of grand importance as wearing clothes in public.

I think the difference between being more of a creature of habit vs being OCD is that the OCD-type folks can't let go or adjust any of their things as if it were the same as changing massive plans to a concert or something - lol.

but OCD is primarily a virus that forces somebody to act upon their opinion.

Very interesting...
 cards85
Joined: 8/30/2011
Msg: 8
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/13/2011 10:12:35 PM
i've never dated someone that was OCD but i had a fling with a girl that was. it was nice, she made my bed every morning and cleaned my house.....legit until i got annoyed with it.
 Dorkvader27
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 9
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/14/2011 6:42:44 PM
Okay some of you are confusing other mental illnesses with being OCD. Hording is a completely different disorder and they are typically not aware they have a problem. They also embrace their illness. An OCD person is aware something is wrong and doesn't embrace it.

As for me I'm fairly mild. I don't have any insane rituals. It doesn't take me hours to get ready. I can be a little rigid but I can be easy going it really depends on the situation and how well I know the person. I'm a bit of a germaphobe and do not like to shake peoples hands or touch/be touched by people unless I know them. Yes it makes my social life difficult. I'm extremely high energy I'm constantly thinking and constantly analyzing things unless I'm exhausted. So most people can not handle it and burn out.

With dating when things start to go a little south or I get the feeling I'm losing them I panic. I can trip a bit over things I probably should not. I know this so I tend to hold things in due to the fact that I do not know if it's something I should be up set about or if I'm being OCD. That doesn't work so I try being honest and open about my feelings which also doesn't work. What most people will view as a minor red flag or something to keep in mind I will probably think about to much and make a bigger deal out of it then I should. I can be very rigid I only ask to hang out 2 or 3 times after that I wont ask again. I will only call once or twice and do not put a lot of chase into things.

It does have benefits I'm extremely creative and I do put a lot of thought into things. I tend to remember details rather well.
 newreality2010
Joined: 10/29/2010
Msg: 10
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Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/14/2011 7:37:12 PM
I went on ONE date with a guy who was OCD (not from POF). I thought it went really well. He emailed me and emailed me to pin down the exact date and time of our plan, I went to the date and it was all good! We met up for sushi, like he suggested, then followed up with the wine bar, and after that we went for a walk.
He was slightly ocd but I ignored it. After the date he emailed me and said he was looking forward to going out again and finding the perfect sushi spot and bottle of wine. Loveley.

I ended up seeing him again at an event, where he was the host. I walked in, picked up my name tag and put it on. He berated me for depriving him of his host duties. I politely overlooked that and carried on. He then let me know that I had an assigned seat, and said I shouldn't for any reason deviate from it (OK?) (I mean why would I?)
Then he came out and announced that dinner was going to be served, and we should all take our seats. I said "Thank you" and he accused me of being short with him.

It was all really wierd. The date was nice, except for the pointed questions....which he commented on all my answers. As if I asked for reviews. Oh well.
 five-marie
Joined: 7/31/2011
Msg: 11
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Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/14/2011 7:44:46 PM
I dated a man for about a year that was diagnosed OCD. It was hard. It's nerve wracking to watch and live with their rituals. The man I dated repeated himself, over and over, the same words. Not too bad unless it was something that made you angry the first time he said it. To listen to it another 10 times, grrr.
He was also nervous, couldn't sleep, ever, despite taking 2 sleeping pills every night. His obsessive behaviour towards me was unsettling to say the least.
I spent less and less time with him as it became a chore to be with him. I couldn't help him, could only watch him struggle against his demons. I felt horrible for him, but could not stand feeling horrible myself whenever I was with him.
His father once told him "No one can stand to be around you, you drive everyone nuts". Nasty thing to say to your child but unfortunately true.
I feel so bad for people with mental illnesses, so little is understood. So hard to treat. Such a lonely illness.
I did stay friends with him until he started dating someone else. She requested he not talk to me anymore. Last I heard he was still with her.
 Morning_Face
Joined: 5/26/2010
Msg: 12
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/14/2011 8:04:54 PM
Not to my knowledge... although how some dates went on.. i bet they were lol
 Rain587
Joined: 7/9/2011
Msg: 13
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/14/2011 10:22:55 PM
I was in a long term relationship with a man with OCD before my ex husband. We did ok the first couple years since he had his own place and I had mine. But in our fourth year we decided to live together and get our household set up before getting married. It was horrible.

He had the third rack in the refrigerator for himself and on the left always a can of tuna to be replaced if he used it. The middle a jar of mayo. The right a jar of pickles. Each had to line up in an exact spot.

In the cupboard he had the bottom shelf and just like the refrigerator he had everything lined up in a certain order. One time I set a bag of chips on his shelf and for the next five hours heard how I disrespected him.

My house had a den and living room. He took over the living room for his furniture (only his) and had his knick knacks put just so. One was a canoe on top of his TV full of old buttons. One day he pissed me off so much I slightly moved a button. Then ever so slightly moved a plate. Normal people wouldn't know. He did. It was a long night of rage (his - I'm not a yeller).

If he tightened table legs he'd tell me he did but had to say it like, "I tightened up one, two, three, four table legs".

He put a can of soda in the freezer to get cold and forgot it. It blew of course. He stood there for two hours staring at it. Not cleaning it or anything. I asked him to allow me to clean it and he blew up at me and went back to staring.

If we went to the movies we had to go extra early to get the same two seats in the same row.

I couldn't take it any longer when he kept taking over more and more of the house and his rages if things were moved.
 Jaimes004
Joined: 8/18/2011
Msg: 14
Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/29/2011 1:10:44 PM
I'm a total neat freak when it comes to my 'space', wherever it may be. Home or work. I like things organized, clean, user friendly, and appealing to the eye. People say I'm OCD, but that is just one aspect of it, I believe. I'm spontaneous, don't have to make plans, and don't like routines, and don't have to have everything my way(open to changes). So it depends on the level on severity of that particular case. I have not had a woman complain about the way I am, they actually love it. But some of the behavior described here would be quite unbearable to live with, and I would move on. Sounds like too stressful.
 MikeWM
Joined: 2/7/2011
Msg: 15
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Have you dated someone that was OCD?
Posted: 9/29/2011 1:22:43 PM
If their OCD meant they wanted to constantly cook and clean I think I could put up with it for a couple of weeks at least :)
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