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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?      Home login  
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 pez..
Joined: 12/3/2011
Msg: 1
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?Page 1 of 2    (1, 2)
Hey everyone, just as the title says really: have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
 gcdeb
Joined: 4/25/2011
Msg: 2
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 12:43:13 PM
Not since I was a teenager.
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 3
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 12:44:23 PM
have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?

That is usually right after a breakup..

You are so young and inexperienced, maybe you haven't yet heard or accepted that the opposite of love is NOT hate, but indifference..
 Cdn_Iceman
Joined: 12/1/2010
Msg: 4
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 12:46:55 PM
When I was in High school yes.... as a adult NO.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 5
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 12:57:24 PM
Ya; it took us six months to actually break up,

It was absolutely terrible.

The sex was pretty fantastic; until we go to the point where we both had more reasons to not sex the other than we had TO sex eachother. At that point; it became a weapon we would both use brutally. <--It was a bit sick really

 carptopus
Joined: 11/9/2011
Msg: 6
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 1:09:55 PM

Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?

Yes.
Until I realized I only "loved" them because they were the easiest means to fulfill my own gratification, and I "hated" them because of what I had to pay to get it and it was easier to "hate" them than myself.
Then I planned on killing her and world domination.

- Stewie
 kailania
Joined: 4/10/2008
Msg: 7
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 2:24:42 PM
i want to say yes.
but I also believe that the opposite of love is indifference.
I havent reached indifference yet and I still love him and I hate him now too.
maybe that makes no sense but its how I feel.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 8
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 3:36:14 PM
Yes.
After a breakup.
So I worked on transcending both emotions.
Your feelings are your responsibility.
You cannot blame them on another.
Master em and you will master the dating thing.
 Kitten189
Joined: 5/25/2011
Msg: 9
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 7:09:16 PM
Aren't they two sides of the same coin....?

And they can easily become inter mingled though fortunately i haven't experienced
that for a very long time.

They're both very passionate emotions and the lines can become blurred.
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 10
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/20/2011 10:38:18 PM
yes. it was sam kinison.

oh, the shame ...
 Kiki928
Joined: 6/13/2011
Msg: 11
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/21/2011 8:07:10 AM
in a way yes, my son's father...but I don't hate him today just back a few yrs ago when he didnt want to work on our marriage...but today I'm nice to him and like him..that's what's best for our son.
 FyrKrakn
Joined: 11/1/2011
Msg: 12
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/21/2011 8:08:46 AM
My first love, I was about 35. I had crushes, and I had love, but my first fall hard and stayed fallen madly in love eventually became a moment of hate. By the time I had enough anger to hate, I realized Ihad never loved him, just an ideal of him and what he represented to me, and I accepted some personal accountability for causing part of the dynamic that put us in a place of anger with each other.

As Kailiana says, the opposite of love is indifference, and that is what I felt for him for a good long time, then the love returned in a quieter form, one in which I wish him well and happy, but have no interest in any kind of interaction with him again, I would just like to cherry pick out the good parts and hope to find those in a man I have more respect for.

Call me broken, but it took me that long in life to fall in love, so when I realized I hadn't even loved him, I had again returned to the mindset that I just wasn't of the type to fall in love with someone. So I married my best friend, expecting this to never be an issue. With the marriage reaching a stuck in the muck standstill, one pulling one way and the other going opposite, we are both two who have never fallen in love with another person and we are both really truly wanting to do that, so we are giving each other the freedom to do so.

I want to fall in love. I would like to believe that, even if I am not yet mature enough to be in love, lacking the experience, I am grown-up enough to stay out of the hate trap.

When you hate, the only person you really hurt is yourself. I think too highly of myself to do such a thing.
 Moonchild51
Joined: 3/11/2007
Msg: 13
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/21/2011 8:14:57 AM
OP, my first answer to your question was "yes". I have loved and hated at same time with my ex husband. Then, taking a moment think about it, the love had left many many years before the split actually came. When it did, I hated as that was part of the process. Now total indifference, could care less really.
 egowitch
Joined: 6/5/2011
Msg: 14
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/22/2011 5:34:41 PM
Definitely ! The two emotions cruise alot of the very same channels in one's mind ...

Though "hate" is a bit strong, and takes way too much energy to maintain.

Perhaps strongly dislike might fit better .
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/22/2011 8:30:49 PM
Yes.

I hated my ex husband for not having the balls to be the man he was suppose to be,
and yet loved him at the same time.

Obviously NOT a healthy mix.

Had a lot of work to do on me.
Therapy works wonders.
 MsMicki
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 16
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/22/2011 8:53:47 PM
I can say I've only come close to hating one person...but it's not really an emotion I've ever allowed myself to feel.
I was taught when I was a teenager that "hate" takes up alot of energy and space in your mind....and as long as you hate someone.....you are allowing that person to still control you emotionally.
So I tend to just "not be in love" with them anymore.

Now.......I might "hate" how their actions have affected a relationship......but I don't hate the person for being who they are....I just move on.
 MrsMau5
Joined: 12/11/2011
Msg: 17
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/22/2011 10:27:54 PM
yes. it's confusing
 Grott
Joined: 12/15/2011
Msg: 20
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/23/2011 2:34:07 AM
Yes my wx Wife - I loved her dearly and we had some good times - but she had a personality disorder - and life was a roller coaster.

I got to the point where I could not leave because I was totally committed to her and helping her but at the same time hating all the drama and screaming.

The more I tried to cope the worse her actions became - and the more violent she became, it pushed me to the point where I wanted to kill he. Councilling got me to understand that I was locked in to a abusive relationship, Much like the Stockholm syndrome. I t was very confusing. But I am out of it now and healing.
 Jewnolikebeef
Joined: 11/25/2011
Msg: 21
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/25/2011 1:25:24 PM
Absolutely, though the love always came out on top...just not in time to save them from disappearing out of my life. Wasn't that I hated her, I loved the girl, just hated the life she tried so desperately to have. Too late now. Hopefully I won't make the same mistake again.
 Confident-Realist
Joined: 2/8/2004
Msg: 22
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/25/2011 8:11:34 PM
Depends on how you define love & hate. Using the terms loosely, oh yes, sure. Using a particular, specific set of definitions for each, I would say no.
 MzChitown
Joined: 9/10/2011
Msg: 23
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/25/2011 10:48:05 PM
Yes...Love and Hate...
I loved unconditionally but also hate the person they are / became.
The love always win for awhile to the point I hate the person to this day for what they did to me.
 imacipher
Joined: 11/14/2011
Msg: 24
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/26/2011 7:52:35 PM
There's a fine line between pleasure & pain...
Yes, I have a good working knowledge of that very specific feeling-& it was a mutual feeling that I shared with my significant other at the time. As I remember it, It was really odd to experience & observe, such an emotional ambiguity develop in that relationship. I think it was that feeling, more than any other particular occurrence in the relationship, that indicated that it was time for us, both, to part ways.
 SweetLilGTP
Joined: 10/22/2010
Msg: 25
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 12/27/2011 9:38:50 AM

such an emotional ambiguity develop in that relationship. I think it was that feeling, more than any other particular occurrence in the relationship, that indicated that it was time for us, both, to part ways.


Ahh yes; the numbness.

(The Frost)

Mine lasted about 8 years.

I was so emotionally exhausted from that love/hate affair.
 TheONEyoullLOVE
Joined: 9/19/2009
Msg: 26
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Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 1/1/2012 8:17:57 PM
yes!! i am going through this right now lol
 jessrar9
Joined: 2/6/2012
Msg: 27
Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?
Posted: 4/7/2012 9:10:09 PM
This post reminded me of something I watched where some hillbilly assed guy said, "me and my wife have a love hate relationship, I love to beat her and she hates the beatings".

But yeah I loved and hated someone at the same time... right now actually. It is the most f*cked up feeling ever. :(
Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Have you ever loved and hated someone at the same time?