| | Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?Page 1 of 1 | So a guy friend (who I'm head over heels for) is very specific about the physical characteristics he seeks in the women he dates. They must fall into a specific race, height, and weight range for him to consider dating them. My question is does this ever change?
He and I are good friends and enjoy each others company a great deal, even when he's in a relationship and even when it is not ok with his gf he makes time to hang out with me. He has on several occasions told me he wants to marry a woman just like me (only not because while he won't say it I don't meet his physical standards in any way shape or form). We both have the same goals in life and obviously similar interests as we spend much of our free time together. I understand and respect that he doesn't share my feelings but are physical characteristics that important to you guys? He has told me he is even considering marrying a girl from overseas because she meets his "criteria"...I just don't get it...thanks in advance for your insight :) | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 10:34:18 AM | OP,Sorry to say this but your friend is a jerk,sounds that he is just into" models" that IF doesn't fit his shallow criteria...then the woman has no chance with him.
Am attracted to some kind of physical female but if I find someone that don't match the physical standard that am looking for,so I don't mind as longer as we get on well,I would get a chance to relationship,to get to know the person better...personality is more important along the way.
I see that you have a crush on this guy...so why don't you tell him about your feelings than riding the true,you must suffering a lot,don't you??
Take a deep brief,be brave and tell him about your feelings,take that from your chest,good luck!!
Break Dance Forever!! | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 10:39:01 AM | The only thing I've ever caved in on, and that was just within the past couple of years, is height... but she damn well better know how to handle a Winchester. Typically, it's been: tall, slender, non-smoking, Republican, loves guns and hunting. Since I'm 6'5", I just don't feel comfortable around women under 5'8" tall... 5'7" is starting to push it... but if I found a gal who fit everything else and was down around 5'3"... I suppose I'd be willing to put up with the Mutt 'n' Jeff jokes (and you young people won't have ANY idea who I'm talking about).
I hunt. I look for animals that appeal to me. I like guns. I buy the ones that appeal to me. I have a nice sports car; I bought it because it appealed to me. The things in my life are IN my life because they appeal to me. WHY would I want someone who does NOT appeal to me?
As for you losing weight... I think you should just give up on this guy, because you likely won't change and STAY changed. Even if you did lose weight, et cetera... and let's say you "snagged" this guy... you'd get into the "I've finally got him, now I can 'coast'" mode and let yourself go (i.e., you'd get heavy again). Smokers quit smoking and then go back, with only RARE exceptions. It's the same thing with using drugs, gambling, losing weight... people go back. If you're happy with who you are, THAT should be what's important to you. Don't change for this guy, because you'll end up holding it against him... or USING it against him in an argument. If you don't fit what he wants, I submit that it's YOU who needs to "get it" and move on.
Good luck, ma'am. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 10:44:25 AM | Hello OP,
I will speak from experience here; My ex wife of 16 years was what I wanted as a young fella of 19. She was 5'2 3/4" (she always made a point to say that), 115 lbs, and a very nice size 3. I have always been attracted to women of this build, as most men are. However, approx 2 years after my divorce, I was introduced to a woman that was very striking to me. She had the personality, the values and the kind of beauty that gave me butterflies the first time we met! I am going to make an educated guess here and say she was a size 8-10, 140-150lbs, 5'3", and everything I desire and would want in a woman. Weight is the only aspect I am now willing to compromise on. Every man will "evolve" in some aspect over the years, but very little I would assume.
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 10:47:05 AM | I know a man who is really in love with Asian women. His past 4 girlfriends were (and current girlfriend is) Asian. I don't think I'll ever see him with a big, curvy blonde.
PS
You're not doing yourself any favors by being his "friend." | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 11:05:09 AM | *smh* @ TALL. no woman needs to lose weight for a shallow man.
Even if she lost weight, he probably still wouldn't date her, because they are friends. He doesn't see her as a potential mate. I am sure if he wanted her, he would've had her by now.
It's guys like these who I hope end up with a skinny girlfriend who turns into their fat wife and they're stuck with her. This is why I secretly hate hot guys, cuz they look at heavier people like they're not people at all.
I had a lover for almost 8 yrs with the same preferences: she needs to be skinny and have a degree. He could have sex with me, but not be in a relationship with me. Well, I called it off and he's still single AND he doesn't have anyone to be his sex slave anymore. He lost on all counts by holding out. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 11:15:17 AM | Honestly no.
If a woman smokes or not, has pets, kids, etc is something many men can go back and forth on throughout their life. But physical characteristics like height or hair color can not be changed for the long haul. Is it shallow? Maybe, but that is the truth.
You need to accept what your friend said at face value and embrace someone who likes you as is. It's that simple. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 11:27:09 AM | His desires might not ever change, but his realities will.....
There will come a time in his life, and most lives, where you still have the fantasy of what you would like, but then you look in the mirror, see what age and life has done to you, and you know, that unless you can buy your fantasy, you will have to look for what you offer......and that is a hard pill for many to swallow.
If life and genetics treat you well, your fantasy can stay alive for some time, and what will happen becomes the reality of maturing, and all of the sudden, those within a decade of you in either direction, look awesome, and you have the tendency to change your black and white thoughts to gray, and finally grow up and enjoy those around you.
cd........   | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 11:52:55 AM | lose the weight for yourself. there's great satisfaction in having work and discipline rewarded.
as a byproduct, you may just find yourself with actual dating prospects instead of an unrequited fantasy. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 12:05:19 PM | Okay let's get this out of the way first of all: Those kind of superficialities are not preferences; more like qualifications.
This guy seems very shallow and I doubt you're going to change his opinion. But you should know that all guys are different, as hard as it is to believe.
While he may not be into you, someone else will. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 12:16:42 PM |
Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Most preferenced will change extremely rapidly through the teens , twenties , but by the thirties, and up, he usually has narrowed down his preferences.
My question is does this ever change?
Yes it can. But don't put your life on hold waiting for it to maybe happen.
but are physical characteristics that important to you guys?
Very important.
He has told me he is even considering marrying a girl from overseas because she meets his "criteria
Well he is an idiot. If she can be found overseas, she can be found here. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 3:12:21 PM | I'm afraid he's not interested in you at the moment and he's probably coming up with reasons which 'logically' exclude you. I wouldn't listen to this rubbish, just get on and meet other guys who are attracted and appreciate all your qualities. He's an idiot anyway if he thinks women come in perfect packages, it's just a sign of immaturity. He's also pretty much suggesting that his own girlfriend is not suitable if he's considering going abroad to find the right girl. That must be great for her! I don't think this guy is worth your mental energy, seriously. He may well carry on in his quest for 'that' woman but don't get hung up on an immature guy.
You can be sure that if you spend less time with him, adoring him and being his special friend, he will come to appreciate you more. Would he changed his mind and fall in love with you? Who knows? One day, he'll probably fall in love with a woman who does not meet his criteria and she won't want to bother with him. Guys like this are always looking for something better round the corner. Can you trust him? I think you are on to a loser with a guy who has this mindset. Instead, turn away from him and keep an eye out for the guys who are not so narrow-minded. You may be pleasantly surprised. You are worth much more than being told you don't fit someone's criteria! | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 3:41:15 PM | IF you can wait till he is 50 or 60...
then maybe.
Most guys are delusional about what they hope to find.
And equally delusional that they can.
Best advice:
Is find a guy who is delusional towards YOUR type.
And cure him of it.
:-)
Cus being appreciated for who you are,
is better than grudgingly settled for.
good luck. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 4:04:26 PM | i think it should change by his age. as a man grow into his adult hood and mature up, somethings in that area should change. unless he never grows.
but that's just my opinion and what i've seen. i'm not a guy so i wouldn't know the best lol | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 4:18:18 PM | I didn't read the entire post I only read the title so I hope this still applies :)
Yes, some times, some guys change their physical preferences in women. At one point in my life I prefered brunettes, then blondes, then redheads, and then back and forth between them all a few more times. Personality and character are much more important though. Hope this helps.  | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 4:20:38 PM | | Speaking from experience... Even if you change or his preferences change they'll always be that nagging thought in the back of your mind "why didn't he want me before"... Some people's tastes change, some don't but you need to just be his friend and find someone who loves you for who you are whether you stay the same or do things to change your appearance | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 4:29:06 PM | OP,Sorry to say this but your friend is a jerk,sounds that he is just into" models" that IF doesn't fit his shallow criteria...then the woman has no chance with him.
Uh, no, he is not a jerk. By her description he's a good guy and they enjoy one another's company. She's just not his physical type. We like what we like, and there's nothing at all shallow about it. It would only be shallow if physical attraction were all that matters to him. Clearly it isn't.
So, OP, the bottom line here is that you're in his "friend zone" and that's where you're going to stay. Find someone who likes your personality and is physically attracted to you. There's absolutely nothing you can do about this guy's lack of physical attraction for you. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 5:00:21 PM | I am totally appalled at the amount of people suggesting the OP change herself to fit this man's criteria!! Of course, someone can have their own ideas of what they are attracted to or not attracted to, but to suggest that someone change themselves simply to appease another is ridiculous. I checked out your profile OP and you are not obese or anything that would warrant (if that could even warrant it) those comments. You should be you - wherever you are happy. And if someone wants to come along and join in on that happiness, then fine. But don't change yourself to fit their idea of what beautiful is.
And to answer the original question...people rarely change their preferences.
And to tag onto another post, you are not doing yourself any favors by continuing this friendship hoping it will become this relationship. Cut your losses and invest that time you are spending with him, into someone else. Right now he's okay choosing you over his gf's, but trust me, when the perfect girl comes along and put's her foot down he is going to drop you faster than you can blink. | |
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| Do guys ever change their physical preferences in women?
Posted: 1/22/2012 5:02:29 PM | | When I was younger and didn't have my stuff together, I could only get a certain caliber of women. Now that I am focused and know what I want in life, it is hard to go backwards, especially when you have already been with the very women you pine for. I don't know your friend, but I know personally, if I didn't have a problem getting the women I desire, why would I settle for less? | |
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