| | How long to give a guy a chance?Page 1 of 1 | | I met this guy this past weekend, hung out both saturday and sunday. He made an official date with me for Monday. reasonable issues on his part (was at hospital out of town visiting friends ill child. stay lasted longer then guy expected) after that he did not make any other plans to get together so naturally I assumed he was not interested so I went and met other fish. We spent 2 days together and he did not try at all to get with me, no kiss or anything! Yet he claims to be attracted/interested in me. What gives? Am I being taken for a ride along here or should I wait this out, if so how long should a gal wait for a guy to grow a pair and atleast make a move? | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:03:59 AM | | Either it's like you said, he needs to grow a pair or you're not giving him the right signals. You may be in fact signaling him to keep his distance. Did you do anything to encourage him? He doesn't want to scare you off ya know. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:06:02 AM | I showed up.
Said I liked him.
As far as 'signals' I am not a play games and catch me if you can kind of woman, so I'm not into that. I state interest and wait for the guy to proceed. Maybe I am a little more respectful than most women my age. | |
|
| |
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:19:25 AM | He "stated/claimed" interest, but you doubt *him, right?
If a woman doesn't give me the right signals, I'll stop and move on. I'm talking about subtle physical signals. Body language is 90% of communication and most of the time people don't even know what they're telling each other. It's true! lol. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:22:15 AM | I gotcha.
Basically I should of jumped HIM in the Tim Hortons washroom for a quickie.
See I have always thought it is the guys role to do that.
Apparently things have drastically changed since I was 14....I am learning. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:26:38 AM | That's not what I mean... just have fun and play along. Flirt a little. Sit close to him, give him a light touch on the arm... let him know that it's okay and you're enjoying his company. Don't act so frigid.
You asked for advice and that's what's up. He's having trouble reading you. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:27:46 AM | | No, that's probably the worst thing you can do. I know that if I was being reserved about a relationship, and the woman "jumped my bones" i'd be kinda taken aback....Talk to him, tell him what your intentions and wants are. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:44:59 AM | | So it is coming up to a week now...I've heard of going slow but I'm not at risk of having a heart attack due to extensive sexual activity. How many more weeks is reasonable for me to wait around to see if this guy will do something? | |
|
| |
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 5:55:18 AM | He'll do something if he's confident you want him too.
He's trying to show some respect to a woman that doesn't appear to want him to make a move (Yet) - that's why he's hanging out and yeah, he may hang out for weeks. Poor confused guy. lol.
Good luck! I'll let others try to help now. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 6:19:46 AM | | 16 billion post asking why guys try and jump a woman's bones by the second date and then this one comes along asking why he didn't! He's not a freaking mind reader! If all you want is sex than tell him for crying out loud. He said he liked you, you said you liked him, now he's supposed to know you want to ride his pony and you are mad because he didn't whip it out and insist you get to know it? Since he's respectfully trying to get to know you but you can't live without the sex why don't you grow a hole and show it to him! | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 7:25:58 AM | IMO if you are sitting there waiting for him to "give" him a chance then you are doing something wrong.
If you are sitting back and observing things like he's a bug "he didn't kiss me, or try to get with me," then you are probably sending out mixed messages and signals.
I mean why did you not try to kiss him or get with him?
Most people are intuitive and not stupid although they play stupid so they don't have to take responsibility.
If you are judging him waiting for him to "grow a pair" then he knows you are waiting for something so in essence you are manipulating and controlling the situation.
Most people don't want to be manipulated and controlled, so they are not going to respond how you want them to and are trying to make them.
So it could be he is sitting there on some level thinking "she wants me to grow a pair and make a move...that's what she wants, that's what she wants me to do, that's what she expects, but if she expects that and gets that then she's going to get bored, and I don't even know if it's the right thing to do because if I do it then she may just classify and box me as like all the other guys, so I am going to try something different."
Or basically, you are more than likely both playing games.
So IMO if you have to "give a guy a chance" you are playing a game, and he is following your game.
So you should play your game for as long as you are getting enjoyment out of it.
Although I would suggest not bytching about it whenever you win you feel like you lose, and whenever you lose you also feel like you lose but you are happy about it. | |
|
| |
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 8:01:39 AM | | In less than a week you saw a guy on two successive days, he got tied up on the third, so you saw another guy, and you ask if the first guy is still interested. You are living in a 4th dimensional time warp. If you wish to establish a real relationship with a real person you need to do so in real time. | |
|
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 8:09:37 AM | Even in the Great White North women can indeed make the move. We have no idea of the substance of your interactions with this guy.
However if he has stated a romantic interest but given it no physical substance AT THE SAME TIME I'm guessing he's lost in a personal dilemna. As others have implied I wouldn't write him off if you've jammed his radar since his compass apparently has malfunctioned.
Good luck young lady. | |
|
| |
| |
| How long to give a guy a chance?
Posted: 2/17/2012 9:29:16 AM | | maybe the guy got a hint of the mindset that allows you trap yourself in the box of your own passivity ... woops, i mean, respectfulness ... and angrily blame others, and figures he'd rather touch some other woman. | |
|
Home
login 
