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 turnitupman
Joined: 1/14/2010
Msg: 1
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Phone numbers?Page 1 of 1    
I'm not great with timing, so even though it's probably an obvious thing to most people, I gotta ask - Ladies, if a man is interested in you, when do you expect to get his number? I'm probably overthinking it but it seems to me too soon would be a sign that you're desperate/creepy, and too late would be... well, too late. So what's the normal timeframe?
 amore01
Joined: 2/14/2012
Msg: 2
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 12:25:54 PM
I think it depends on the circumstance and situation,and the person.There is no set "time".being creepy can also be just by the individual..some people are just creepy and send out bad vibes because they have bad motives and intentions.But I think if communication is going well,and there is interest on both sides,then go for it.Its better to know for sure ,then be too late.
 lightbrownsuga2luv
Joined: 12/1/2011
Msg: 3
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 12:39:11 PM
Not sure on time frame, I have had guys give me there number after the second third message, didn't call right away, but when I did, they didn't seem creepy nor did I feel it was creepy for them to ask or give after a couple three messages.
I will also mention that the messages was not within the same day, so that kind of helped me too.
 IronBelle
Joined: 3/13/2012
Msg: 4
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 12:40:36 PM
Once we agree we want to meet face to face. Do not just e mail it and for God sakes, do NOT e mail it asking women to * text you *. Pick the phone up, enter the digits and hit CALL/ SEND.
 Amy_Sing
Joined: 3/28/2012
Msg: 5
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 1:37:56 PM
I've only given my number to one person on here and only did so because I felt comfortable with it. There really isn't a time frame for me to feel comfortable enough to give a man my number. In fact, I don't know how many days I'd even spent messaging this person before I gave him my number but it wasn't terribly long. What I do know is that I've messaged with other people for longer periods in the past, but not felt comfortable enough to give them my number.

If you want to give someone your number but aren't sure if it's too soon, just give it but with no expectations. That's what I did. I don't have expectations of anyone on here, they don't owe me anything. If you adopt that attitude you may enjoy things better on here, just go with the flow.

Offering your number whilst making it clear that it's without expectation means she doesn't feel presurred to phone you or give her number in return but is free to phone you if she wishes to.
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 6
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 2:01:38 PM

I'm not great with timing, so even though it's probably an obvious thing to most people, I gotta ask - Ladies, if a man is interested in you, when do you expect to get his number? I'm probably overthinking it but it seems to me too soon would be a sign that you're desperate/creepy, and too late would be... well, too late. So what's the normal timeframe?

How about, when I ask for it? Yeah.
 DevotedExplorer
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 7
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 2:12:06 PM
I normally have a good tactic and it does work well and doesn't put pressure on the women to give you hers or call you ect. This is what I normally do, I dont normally ask for a number before asking or meeting on a first date. This is what I typically say "we can arrange a time/day and place and then if you feel you cant make it for what ever reason you can just message me beforehand, make sure if you do message up to a day beforehand, im only saying this as you may not be comfortable with me having your number and vice versa" then if we get on after the date I would be more than happy to give away my number or she will just ask me for it, I think it relaxes the women anyways as they know if they dont enjoy my date they wont get tons of text and calls off me if I enjoyed it and want to meet them or the other way round, as they can always block me online if they wanted you cant really do that on the phone easily. Not that I would be the type to harass a lady but im sure you girls get this all the time.
 DevotedExplorer
Joined: 8/12/2011
Msg: 8
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 2:15:39 PM
I have to say tho also that I normally ask a girl out within around 4 messages or 7 max dependant on circumstances. I dont see a need for her number in such a short period of time , after all I want to talk to her in person on a first date.
 sainbain
Joined: 12/19/2011
Msg: 9
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/8/2012 3:47:18 PM
Absolutely agree with DevotedExplorer's point above. I almost never give out my number until the meet is set. I'm not looking for a text buddy; I want to actually sit down face to face with the person and have a talk with him. Typically once the meeting is set up, the guy will offer his number so I can get in touch if something comes up.

I think this might be a bit of a generation-divide thing. For me, being asked for my number before I have even met someone instantly puts me on my guard to a certain extent. Sort of like the old-school requests for an MSN addy. It gets me thinking, 'why can't you say whatever it is you want to say right here, where it is free and does not include my personal info?'
 licoricecat_1
Joined: 11/23/2008
Msg: 10
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/10/2012 5:38:01 AM
Usually, on line, if there is common interests per profile, ---I will send messages on line back and forth. If the conversation is light and seems to be flowing, I will ask for a phone number. We exchange and talk on phone and then arrange a time to meet. I like a phone number before the meet, in case we cancel. It is too uncertain without a phone number to drive out somewhere and not recognize the person or vehicle. When we meet, we can decide at end of the meet, if we should meet again. Sometimes meets are very intimidating because it gives your partner the chance to scrutinize you closer. It should not be all physical though and sometimes men make it that. If the conversation flowed on the phone, why should it not flow in person?
 1fastsob
Joined: 9/8/2011
Msg: 11
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/10/2012 11:35:31 PM
I never give my number out first.

When they are ready and comfortable, they'll give theirs.
 3ffervescent
Joined: 7/1/2010
Msg: 12
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/10/2012 11:46:12 PM
One of the guys in here gives the girls his number, and tells them to block their number (caller id) and give him a call --
nice concept, you get to chat to the guy without giving him your number...

(but you would have to have a pretty good thing going online first or you will come off as creepy), and for the love of God, Allah and Vishnu -- never, ever send them naked pics if you do get their number...
[not that you would -- just needs to be said]
 Bubsy55
Joined: 9/5/2011
Msg: 13
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/11/2012 3:29:28 AM
In life we cannot sit around and wonder if people may or may not be interested. For instance. If I like someone...I will simply e them my phone number. Now if they don't call then it's because they don't want to. So that to me is an answer based on non reaction.

But then we must have developed interest in them to choose the above.

Now for one who would randomly just e their phone number to users is obviously picking at people like straws which is low life.
 BearFish11
Joined: 1/28/2010
Msg: 14
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/11/2012 1:43:56 PM
its a case-by-case basis, usually its better not to press for it, rather look at the messages, see how its going from there, and see what happens, its never a guarantee though.. GL
 Luv2Cruise1971
Joined: 1/29/2012
Msg: 15
Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/11/2012 2:06:38 PM
I am very hesitant to give my number out. Like it or not, we are in an age of technology and I like to use it. I generally prefer to exchange messages on POF first till I get to know the basics. Then soon after exchange texts and/or emails. Once I'm comfortable with the guy, then we'll meet up and it's at that point - the day before we meet - that I'll give him my number just incase he needs to change anything or running late, etc. But I like to have a comfort level with him first before we meet up and certainly before I hand out my number.
 lovableladywanted
Joined: 5/14/2006
Msg: 16
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/12/2012 10:02:44 PM
As my profile states. I am androgynous but , and its a big but. I believe a man calls a woman. I always talk respectful to women and if I do not get a phone numbe or at least a public meeting which obviously leads to a phone number, thats it. If other men do it differently thats fine. I am very confident in what I have to offer to a lady and quite frankly feel that its the ladies loss. No hard feelings on my part. We are all individuals and have freewill and ladies have a right to not give me their number and I have a right to move on.
 *Cowboy*
Joined: 4/28/2006
Msg: 17
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Phone numbers?
Posted: 4/13/2012 10:41:26 AM

Absolutely agree with DevotedExplorer's point above. I almost never give out my number until the meet is set. I'm not looking for a text buddy
Totally disagree. I wont meet anyone I have not talked to on the phone first. Most women ASK ME for my phone number within 5 or 6 messages if they want to meet.

They are welcome to call me and block their number to protect their identity for a phone call or two.

If I ask a gal to meet me it is always on the phone. So no phone call means we wont be meeting. I want to know they are REAL. That they are actually even FEMALE. And that they can at least talk a little before I agree to meet. If they cant figure out a way to do that I move onto the next candidate. I feel this is minimum requirements for em to meet someone on here for the first time. This may also be a major reason I have only had one person on here ever not show up for a first meeting.

It is EASY for a woman on here to hide their phone number to call you.

But after one or two calls we schedule a first meeting or know we are just not a match and move on. If we schedule a meeting I want a cell phone number or its no deal. They need my number and I need a number for them in case they are late or in traffic or an emergency, they get lost etc... You can get a throw away phone at any conveniecne store for $10. You can use google voice to get a FREE phone n umber to give out that will ring to your actual cell phone to protect ya. If you are going to actively date and meet online then get serious and get with the program.

I agree to meet people serious about meeting that know how to do this. I pass on all others. No exceptions.

Cowboy
 Meowzer101
Joined: 12/12/2009
Msg: 18
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Phone numbers? & *67
Posted: 4/13/2012 1:44:58 PM
I'd have to agree with the the Devoted Explorer guy as well. Another way to make a girl feel comfortable is to show her the little *67 trick. You dial that before his number & yours will come up as blocked, restricted, or no information. It has worked well for me in those situations where she might feel a little nervous- shy, whatever.
Just dial * (star) then 67 then his/her number. Good luck & be safe out there...
Phil
 grove_22
Joined: 1/30/2012
Msg: 19
Phone numbers? & *67
Posted: 5/1/2012 6:17:21 AM
I will often ask for a woman's number after 3-4 email messages. Many women would give me their number after I asked. ( Sometimes they would voluntarily give me their number on their own after a few email messages ) While some other women stopped talking to me after I asked for their number. If a woman is unwilling to give her number before a date / meeting, then chances are I wouldn't want a date with her. As stated earlier, buy a cheap prepaid cell phone and just use it for internet dating if you don't want to give your real number.
 7thour
Joined: 12/2/2011
Msg: 20
Phone numbers?
Posted: 5/1/2012 6:20:40 AM
99% of the time, I have to meet him first before I give out my number.
 funinsun32
Joined: 9/1/2011
Msg: 21
Phone numbers?
Posted: 5/1/2012 6:22:37 AM
Everyone is going to be different. You take the chance after a few exchanges. What do you really have to lose? The only time I have found it "creepy" is in a first email.... The whole "Hey!! Hit me up 555-3300" is a little much for me.
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