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 sprite1950
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 1
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?Page 1 of 1    
Scenario: You meet someone, fall in love with them, everything is great and then you find out they have done something bad in their past, something violent involving a previous partner, maybe been to prison for it. They havent told you and you find out through another source. Would you still date them or would you end it bearing in mind they have kept it from you?
 TexasNightOwl
Joined: 8/24/2008
Msg: 2
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/15/2012 11:21:58 PM
I would verify it thru court records (accessible over internet now most places). BeenVerified.com gives free report once a month. But if it is true then I would want proof that they did well in anger management classes. And at the first sign of anger managment issues I would permanently move on. Life is too short and tough to put up with abusive people.
 AlmostNormal666
Joined: 4/6/2012
Msg: 3
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 12:32:06 AM
If it turned out to be true, i would definetly move on , no way would i take the chance that the person may change , the woman who had her eyes gouged out by her boyfriend who was violent thought she could change him ,but eventually realised there was no changing him when it was too late for her .

http://news.sky.com/home/uk-news/article/16207978

http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/mum-who-had-her-eyes-gouged-out-794063
 sprite1950
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 4
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 12:44:21 AM
^^^ I found that quite hard to read Normal. To think of the pain she suffered and how dramatically her life has changed is horrifying.
 nige 1960
Joined: 4/1/2007
Msg: 5
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:03:49 AM
If they can keep that from you what else are they hiding, doesn't matter if its a man or woman there gone, how many friends do you have who have a violent past.
 shortbutsweet63
Joined: 8/21/2011
Msg: 6
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:13:32 AM
Definitely not!

What do they say about a leopard never changes its spots...................................
 sprite1950
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 7
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:17:24 AM
What if this person had hurt someone trying to protect their family? Wouldnt the circumstances make a difference to how you would view them?
 mizzrocklobster
Joined: 12/5/2011
Msg: 8
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:23:59 AM
For the USA yes We live in ENGLAND hence UK forums @Msg 2
 Whitey5.10.74
Joined: 8/9/2009
Msg: 9
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:24:57 AM
^^^^^
Someone beating someone up because they had done something to their family is a totally different scenario that a wife beater surely?
 AlmostNormal666
Joined: 4/6/2012
Msg: 10
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:25:01 AM
What if this person had hurt someone trying to protect their family? Wouldnt the circumstances make a difference to how you would view them?


If a partner of mine had hurt someone acting in self defence or protecting his family , that is totally different to being violent to a partner , usually people who are violent to their partners are abusive bullies and mind controlling idiots .
Depending what the circumstances are surrounding the person who had hurt someone in self defense or protecting the family , would really depend on my view of them .But you did actually put violence to a previous partner , you didnt really put protecting family or self defense in your opening post .So our views are going to be based on violence to a partner .
 sprite1950
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 11
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:46:45 AM
.But you did actually put violence to a previous partner


... involving a previous partner .. yes ok ... what if they had hurt a previous partner protecting someone they loved, like a child or another family member. I think its understandable but it would be the fact they hadnt told me that would be the problem even though I could see why.
 AlmostNormal666
Joined: 4/6/2012
Msg: 12
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 1:58:13 AM
... involving a previous partner .. yes ok ... what if they had hurt a previous partner protecting someone they loved, like a child or another family member. I think its understandable


I think my view would be the same , although when it comes to a child i could understand why they did it , but i dont think i could have a relationship with anyone who is violent . I can understand they were protecting their family but that is what the police/law is there for , it would be wrong for them to take it upon themselves to be violent to a partner .
 punkadiddle
Joined: 12/8/2011
Msg: 13
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 2:36:54 AM
Obviously it would depend upon why and to whom they were violent.

If it was their wife or children then I wouldn’t touch them with a plague doctor’s lancet. It is, though, quite depressing how many women would be queuing up for an opportunity to attempt to “change” them.
 billywambam
Joined: 4/9/2012
Msg: 14
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 2:42:12 AM
it depends.my ex lass weighed 18 stone and had been in prison 3 times for GBH.the last time was for beating up 2 bailiffs who came to our house for non payment of rent and council tax.she also beat up 2 policemen and a police dog who came to arrest her after the incident.i slept through all of this because it was giro day and id just had good belly full of beer down social club.i didnt mind her being violent.especialy when she use to tie me up in the bedroom and give me a chuffing good braying with her bullwhip.
 stonecastle
Joined: 2/14/2007
Msg: 15
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 4:02:47 AM
Some people with violent pasts can change completely. Like this guy for instance: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=isEEycfQe4k
 Emma_Dilemma65
Joined: 5/4/2011
Msg: 16
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 10:23:38 AM
... no ta ... not interested in demented loons ... !
 OneOnOwn
Joined: 1/1/2012
Msg: 17
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 10:46:31 AM
I always ask for 3 references from past partners and a full police check. Also declarations of financial status, points on driving licence and whether they have ever bought cheap duty free cigarettes from someone. I even take 2 friends as chaperones on dates now.

Is there anyone on here who is squeaky clean? Nothing to hide whatsoever including telling porkies to their mum when they stayed at a mates house but went out clubbing??

Can you include dumping or abandoning his/her kids causing mental cruelty ? That can have far more long term effects than just thumping someone.

I'm afraid that in many cases you have to make your own decisions what someone is like and not listen to tittle tattle .

Yes I do know a guys who changed their errant ways when they met the right lady. How do you account for the ladies who fall for criminals in prison on life sentences ?
 mazeyh
Joined: 7/7/2009
Msg: 18
Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 11:30:03 AM
How do you account for them? They are probably sadly lacking in some department.Grateful for small mercies- at least he doesn't cheat and go out on the lash of a weekend.And he's not going to shag, have a fag, rollover and fart.Well at least not for the foreseeable future.So they can keep the 'romance' alive.
 ~Hams~
Joined: 9/18/2008
Msg: 19
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Would you date anyone with a violent past?
Posted: 4/16/2012 11:32:09 AM
I had a girlfriend once who would throw my dinner in the bin if I turned up just
a couple of minutes late so I decided that I'd never date another violent woman ever again.
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