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 BLoNde__ANgeL
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 1
meds when u r older & side effectsPage 1 of 3    (1, 2, 3)
anyone in here have to take meds after age 45, whether temporary or long term, only to deal w/ side effects, like insomnia or crazy dreams? How do you cope? What do you expect your partner to do? Deal or bail?

No this is not a self pity, cuz I am not talking about me ;0) please do not delete

I never saw anything in over 45 about meds & side effects other than ED & viagra...
 ecochick1962
Joined: 4/6/2012
Msg: 2
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 2:48:15 AM
I have been prescribed meds that I have chosen not to take because of the side effects. If I had a partner I probably wouldnt tell him, Id suck it up and deal with it on my own.
 ohenryx
Joined: 3/12/2010
Msg: 3
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 8:02:03 AM
BlondeAngel, if you’re not talking about yourself, who are you talking about? It kind of matters whether we are talking about a man or a woman, and what kind of relationship, and what stage that relationship is presently at.

But I’ll give you a “for instance”. Most of you have probably seen the movie “It’s Complicated”. If not, I highly recommend it. Remember the scene in the hotel where Alec Baldwin faints? This is due to medicine he was taking for an enlarged prostate, and the associated symptoms. After the fainting spell, he says, basically, “The hell with that, I’ll just keep getting up 4 times a night to piss.” I have been there, lived that, and it is not something I find necessary to talk about. If I’m seeing someone, and they make a reference to how often I have to find a restroom, then I will explain.
 Molly Maude
Joined: 9/11/2008
Msg: 4
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 9:48:06 AM
no clue what medications or side effects you're talking about ... I'm guessing you're talking about a PRESCRIBED medication and not some "medicine" you saw advertised on t.v. ...

but ... if a medical doctor prescribes a medication for your body, chances are he's not doing it for HIS health ... he's trying to create a healthier YOU ...

a healthy YOU is far more appealing to others than a weak, puny sickly you ... AND ... who wants to go thru life sick? I certainly don't!

if the side effects of a medication prescribed by a medical doctor bothers you so much that you're considering not taking it ... OMG! GO TO the doctor and TELL him/her so a BETTER prescription can be made ... this is your health we're talking about!

why waste your time and money going to a doctor if you're not going to follow the doctor's advice and take the prescriptions? doctors are overworked and don't need patients who come in, waste their time then don't follow their advice ...

by the way ... "older" people don't necessarily need medications more than "younger" people ... if younger people took prescribed medications and took care of their bodies, they might live to be healthier older people ...
 DrummingNut
Joined: 4/26/2010
Msg: 5
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 9:51:53 AM
I had an elderly neighbor. In her 80's. I knew she was on some meds, didn't know which ones.

She told me one day that the doctor put her on fluid pills recently because her legs were swelling with water retention.

Then she said "but they make me soooo tired, I don't like these fluid pills".

I got a bit alarmed and said maybe there was some medicine interaction going on, water pills shouldn't make you feel tired.

She said "oh that's not it, I get tired because I have to keep getting out of my chair to go to the bathroom".

!!! hahahahahaa !!!

I still get a giggle when I think of her saying that.
 Twilightslove
Joined: 12/9/2008
Msg: 6
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 10:36:56 AM
I no longer take any medications at all. This includes over the counter medicines and I feel better for not taking them. The side effects are very real and should not be discounted by the person taking them, their SO or their physician. Too often doctors simply add a new pill when you complain of symptoms instead of realizing the new symptom is a side effect of the initial drug. Some of these side effects are permanent so it is very important to read about them before taking any medication.

I have relatives who still take the newest pharmaceutical drugs on the market that are currently be pushed onto people and have had to deal with some of the crazy side effects they caused. These have been some very scary and dangerous side effects for the last few years. I've seen two go into liver failure (luckily reversed), suicidal attempts, violent actions, extreme paranoia, and more. One drug was a smoking cessation drug that caused constant vomiting and erratic behavior.

Please make sure you know what you are taking. Most diseases and conditions can be fixed with proper rest, nutrition, exercise and counseling, if it is depression or another behavior problem.

No, I'm not a doctor. I have just lived through a lot.
 IgorFrankensteen
Joined: 6/29/2009
Msg: 7
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 11:49:50 AM
I think you've asked a fairly specific question here. How ought one deal within a relationship, with the side effects of needed medicines?

My answer is twofold:

First and foremost, communication is always the number one most important thing to exercise in any relationship. If your meds cause side effects, you let your relationship partner know both what those effects are, and how you feel about them. This is pure practicality. They need to know how to adjust themselves, to best get along with the new or temporarily altered version of you.

Second, though I am not religious, I still like the old Biblical marriage phrase, "in sickness and in health" and so forth. It's important to know how committed you are to each other. I have no moral or ethical or even emotional problem with anyone setting up any relationship parameters they want. If they want to marry and change the terms to "until you get fat, or suffer from medicinal side effects I don't care for," that's fine with me....as long as their partner knows and agrees to this.

As for my experience, I was on anti-depressants for several years. I am off them now, both because I never liked the side effects, and because I seem to have "evolved" past the need for them. During the time I was on them, I let my partner know in detail, how they effected me, for precisely the reason I gave above. Although our marriage ended in the trash bin, it was not because of the meds or the side effects. Oh, and the meds did their job very well. I was helped tremendously.
 BlackLady1953
Joined: 5/27/2011
Msg: 8
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 1:41:10 PM
My health comes first......if there are side effects that we cannot deal with together (if I had a partner), then I am more than capable of dealing with them alone!
 Ready_Real
Joined: 12/30/2010
Msg: 9
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/27/2012 2:03:35 PM
All meds are about trade offs. For those women experiencing the effects of menopause on joints, HRT can dramatically decrease both joint stiffness and joint pain. Until recently I never realized that among the many benefits of a younger woman's plentiful supply of pre-menopause estrogen is that estrogen acts as a great lubricant for joints.
Some women decide to decrease their activity in response to this mobility change, others elect to go on HRT and risk the - albeit infinitely lower risk than even a decade ago -- side effects of stroke, cancer. Like everything else, we all have our uniquely personal definitions of what is meant by "quality of life" for ourselves. But there's no free and easy lunch and no free and easy road to aging after 45. . .
 BLoNde__ANgeL
Joined: 9/20/2011
Msg: 10
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/29/2012 3:47:18 PM
Ok, Piroxicam for 2 more weeks, messing up my sleep cycle bad! crazy dreams, waking up, etc. The painkillers after surgery made me feel ill & drugged out, no wonder i didn't notice the pain...i was too messed up! Yikes, I don't wanna take that ever again.

I love my natural compounded progesterone, if I forget a couple of days, people can tell...I get cranky & weepy!

These pharmaceutical companies that make this stuff, do they think we like feeling worse, instead of better? & have to pay a copay on top of it?

Holistic & homeopathic is the way to go!!!!
 Megaladonfishy
Joined: 5/7/2008
Msg: 11
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/29/2012 5:22:50 PM
I don't know anyone on viagra however it seems like /everyone is on some kind of antidepressant, pain killers or sleeping pills, which makes me think just the opposite about why they get prescribed so constantly when it is well documented that these are probably the most addictive substances known to man... and woman excepting maybe nicotine.....Obviously few argue the tobacco companies had our health ahead of their pocketbooks, how about doctors and pharmacutical companies?
 TryAgan
Joined: 4/4/2008
Msg: 12
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/29/2012 6:27:43 PM

anyone in here have to take meds after age 45, whether temporary or long term, only to deal w/ side effects, like insomnia or crazy dreams?

I don't take any meds, but if I ingest too much roughage, it's usually accompanied by serious side effects.
Even worse can be the trips to Mexico.
 stellavixen
Joined: 2/17/2012
Msg: 13
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/29/2012 6:38:12 PM
At our ages we face health issues as well as changes in life that change not only our chemical makeup, but our emotions and cognitive skills.

All you can do is hope that your partner is compassionate and understanding.
 stellavixen
Joined: 2/17/2012
Msg: 14
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/29/2012 7:08:11 PM
Say for instance... you suffer with anxiety because your x husband used to physically abuse you and you take ativan for it.....

and say he has ED because his wife used to cheat on him and the thought of a woman cheating on him makes him unable to keep an erection....

Its all about compassion and understanding.

Don't get me started on mid-life crisis and menopause!
 cariboolady1
Joined: 3/22/2012
Msg: 15
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/29/2012 7:57:21 PM
I was one of those that never took anything at all for most of my life...until I reached 55. Then boom! I developed age-onset Diabetes 2 in which my pancreas and liver decided to call it quits as a partnership. I didn't know that I had it until my body went haywire as it affected my thyroid, too. I thought it was menopause!
Funny thing, I had been active all my life and took care of my weight. Then twenty-eight lbs. crept on without me changing my eating habits. I couldn't get it off with dieting as I started fainting everywhere. Other things were happening to my body and by the time the doctor (new) diagnosed me, I was starting to shut down.
Now, I am on pills for it and feel better than I have been in about 5 years. My weight is down and I have been going to the gym as it's important to keep up the physical activity. My doctor recommended that I change careers as my accounting job of 50-55 hours a week was killing me. So, now I am happy as a clam checking groceries at a large retail chain foodstore.
I have to tell potential dates that I have Diabetes 2 as it's only fair that they know. This is where you either see the compassion/understanding or where you see him make a jet trail out of your life.
Side effects? Going to the bathroom more often. Other than that, feel very normal.
 DragonBits
Joined: 1/6/2012
Msg: 16
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/30/2012 11:13:30 AM
The only prescription medication I take is Nebido, and I expect my partner to go out of her way to cope with the side effects. We often talk and make deals about about different ways we can cope with this.
 ChancesRMD
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 17
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/30/2012 12:26:19 PM

What do you expect your partner to do? Deal or bail?


You really didn't give enough information to provide an intelligent response to this question. I can see in some circumstances, especially in a new relationship, that I wouldn't expect the partner to stay. Hopefully the illness, medications and side effects would be known before considering it a "relationship".

Considering the side effects, almost by definition, are negative. I can't see the reasoning for not revealing them to your partner. The alternative being you are naturally like that?

A different topic, but the same idea. I grew up with 3 sisters and a mother. As a young man when the PMS light bulb went on I had a much better understanding of their crazy behavior. My daughter has anxiety attacks. Together we have learned how to manage them without the chaos of when she first started to get them. Couples can learn how to work through many issues with meds just by open communication and an open mind.
 ChancesRMD
Joined: 4/11/2009
Msg: 18
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/30/2012 12:31:49 PM

Please make sure you know what you are taking. Most diseases and conditions can be fixed with proper rest, nutrition, exercise and counseling, if it is depression or another behavior problem.

No, I'm not a doctor. I have just lived through a lot.


If you were a doctor you would have known to be cautious about giving advice regarding medicines. I understand the point you were making, but even hinting to someone that they might be able to do without their meds might be like a game of russian roulette.
 turnitover1959
Joined: 2/15/2013
Msg: 19
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/6/2013 8:28:26 PM
If the side effects are less than the benefits you have to deal with it. You should go back to the doctor because a lot of times they have more than one med for an illness. Timing your meds perfectly also helps. Sometimes you can delay a dose or take it early once you get used to it. Telling yourself its the meds not you and it will pass helps
 BLONDE_ANGEL845
Joined: 6/30/2012
Msg: 20
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/6/2013 8:53:39 PM
I took meds for a few weeks over a year ago after surgery then threw it out w/ my drs blessing. My sleep cycle went back to normal, I had a nitemare on the morning of my would have been wedding anniversary about a man I knew irl. I dreamt he was trying to break down the front door of my house. Freud would have had a field day w/ that one.
 turnitover1959
Joined: 2/15/2013
Msg: 21
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/6/2013 9:18:28 PM
You have to tell yourself there is nothing wrong that the medicine is doing that. This too shall pass.
 lostnfoundluv
Joined: 1/10/2009
Msg: 22
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/7/2013 1:27:06 PM
for some reason people dont mention in their profile what they are suffering from and what medication they are taking. it is only when one question about the medication do they get answer . So ask ask ask and remember nobody is perfect .
 deleteme2day
Joined: 12/2/2012
Msg: 23
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/7/2013 1:31:27 PM


I never saw anything in over 45 about meds & side effects other than ED & viagra...


As the commercial states, "if you have an erection lasting longer that 4 hours call your doctor". :^)
 TrishaF2011
Joined: 7/26/2011
Msg: 24
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meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/7/2013 2:49:54 PM
I am 53 and take a number of meds, most of which I hope will end up being temporary. I have some insomnia issues but I am not certain if they are due to any of the meds. I also take procardia which gives me hot flashes ( oh what fun that is, I had gotten past the "flash stage" when I started taking it) I will continue to take it as the theraputic advantages far and away outweigh the side effect.
Every one reacts differently to medication, either otc or prescription. Everyone's partner also reacts and tolerates the different side effects in their individual manner. For me, I would expect a partner to deal with it as best they could. If that included bowing out of the relationship, then ok. It would be a difficult transition but lets be fair, if they cannot tolerate a side effect, then they are actually doing the other person a favor by exiting.
Seriously, if they cannot deal with a little side effect then they are probably not capable of being a good supportive partner in the event of a serious or catastrophic illness.
Sometimes its just best to cut y0ur losses and move on.
 Giggles10000
Joined: 2/17/2013
Msg: 25
meds when u r older & side effects
Posted: 4/7/2013 4:33:06 PM
I took chemo, I dont recommend it cause I lost my hair!!! But hey I'm alive now --

The doctors seems to want to treat things with a pill and I dont like that at all, I think finding out what is wrong and fixing it is a better solution. I know lots of people who end up taking one medication to counter the side effects of another medication and before long you are taking a ton of medicine all with side effects.

So basically I threw most of my medications away and I google about what they say I have and then I find a way to fix it--one point I had issues with my feet and they put me on all kinds of things and ends up not wearing flats but something with a bit of a heel corrected it; I also took a water bottle and froze it and would roll in under my foot back and forth until there wasn't any pain--I went from not being able to walk in the mornings (felt like someone was sticking pins in my feet) to not having a problem. It pays to be proactive about your own health.
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