| | Rules for cancelling a datePage 1 of 1 | Can anyone please advise me on this?
Twice I have had guys cancel on me last minute, when I have texted them before a date to confirm. If I hadn't texted, would they have just stood me up and said nothing?
The first guy I had arranged to meet for coffee. We hadn't met before. I texted about an hour before the time to confirm and he replied by text, saying he forgot about it, despite us having been on the phone two nights previously for over an hour talking about it. I ignored his text and didn't contact him again as I was hurt and surprised at his attitude. A month later, he contacted me via the site saying 'What happened to us staying in touch' as if nothing had happened, but I told him I did not want to meet him.
The second guy I met twice, was not sure about, but decided to meet again and see. We spoke on the phone, agreed to meet for lunch in a few days. Again, just to be sure I texted late the night before to confirm and he sent back a short text saying he was too busy at work to meet up. Again, I got the feeling if I hadn't made any contact he would have just left me hanging.
Is it ok to do this? There have been several times I lost interest in meeting someone for whatever reason or wasn't feeling the best, but because they had gone to some effort to organise a date and it was already arranged, I still showed up. I am starting to feel like some people on this site have a very rude and disrespectful attitude and it makes me really reluctant to meet anyone else in case they do the same thing to me again. Why do people do this?
If this second guy wants to meet up again, should I just say no? I suppose a lot of people are dating more than one person at a time, so this feels like being Plan B, D, or Z, definitely not a first choice, when you get stood up at the last minute. | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 5/3/2012 7:04:16 AM | | Move on, takes 2 seconds to pick up the phone or send a simple message, if you cant make a date or appointment for whatever reason it's common courtesy to inform people a bit in advance. | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 5/3/2012 8:07:53 AM | | there due to the internet men+ women multi-date espescially younger gen. some damaged/sick peeps just get kick outta this. ethier way they not worth your time, move on your better than them.prob had gfs/wives something come up at last min.no they prob would not informed you.thier loss im sure | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 5/3/2012 10:12:14 AM | | Ok thanks for your feedback. I thought that but just wanted to check if my standards are too high and everyone else just accepts this nonsense! | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 5/3/2012 11:27:39 AM | Hello Miss, I have had this happen on numerous occasions!
I think, as bad and rude as it is, it is something we have to accept from people these days. I too would never do that, like you I always text to confirm the date is till on and I would never NOT turn up for a date that had been organised. I think that you and me, miss, have similar high integrity, something sadly lacking in todays internet society.
Don't give up though because there are a few guys out there who will have similar standards to your own. | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 5/16/2012 10:28:44 AM | This happened to me 4 times with one of those being the guy just didn't bother to reply to my txt confirming the date.
It is really really annoying | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 5/19/2012 4:28:33 AM | | Would you really want to date someone if they hadn' he manners to cancel. Lucky escape I would say !! | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 6/21/2012 8:58:10 AM | | u mgt want to make sure they are 'really interested' b4 u set up a plan w'them. If they are just so so, that prob means they are not really into it because they've got other pokers in the fire. | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 6/23/2012 3:59:42 PM | I think a lot of the time if a person does agree to a date but later changes their mind, they rather do nothing and let it slide than do something and let you know.
I don't think it's necessarily malicious, and I don't think these people are trying to be mean (I mean obviously it is mean not to let someone know you're cancelling, but it is a meanness of inaction rather than action.) A guy who does not cancel properly, but still thinks they can chat away with you are definitely messing you about by not being honest and up front. From the examples you've given, when you contact a guy before a date and he says he can't make it, he probably would not have contacted you on his own initiative, because that'd require a little back bone, which a lot of people don't have. It seems like some people will avoid the simple, yet necessary confrontation involved in telling someone a date is off. It's like filing accounts or clearing out the attic, people know they really, really need to do it, but will put it off so long that in the end it's too late. | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 6/23/2012 4:50:09 PM | | Probably just got cold feet, It can be fairly nerve wrecking also if the chemistry ist really there i suppose its best to just to give it a quick end. I only ever met two people of here though so i cant really say much about the whole internet dating thing. | |
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| Rules for cancelling a date
Posted: 8/10/2012 4:12:57 AM | I've been in the second guys situation before. I was supposed to meeting this girl 2hours after my work, I never have my phone on in work, cause i know it will distract me. But I did tet her before work and tellher I'm going to turn off my phone. I was supposed to be finished at 6, yet I didn't until 9 due to last minute logisitic problems. I did however inititate the cancellation, saying I'm over my head in work, But I was sincere. I actually did want to meet up with her and I Apologised and offered to meet her some other time.
Its not just Men who are" very rude and disrespectful attitude". Because The amount of mails I have sent and got no reply, yet I see they are online, Frustrates me to the letter. Some women think they are high and mighty which is a massive turn off. | |
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