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 Ljj5911
Joined: 3/1/2012
Msg: 1
Men Wanting sex right away??Page 1 of 1    
So I am on another dating sight and seem to do ok with the initial interest. I do have 3 young children and this I know lessens the number of responses. However, when I do get emails, I notice a trend. THey start off very interesting, discussing our interests, dating experience family, etc. (this over a few days, I'm not a fan of drawn out emailing). Then all of a sudden things take a turn to sex. The last guy I was emailing seemed bright, interesting, had a noteworthy carrer, the emails flowed. And his last one said " how about we have 3 dates in one night instead of 3 one night dates, get that 3 date rule out of the way". I know what he's looking for now. He was more upfront than others but this seems to happen a lot. Agauin I'm more active on another site, so I don't count emails I get on POF...

My question is, do men discount single moms as relationship material and go after the sex instead?
 InMyOwnTime25
Joined: 4/16/2012
Msg: 2
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 8:08:58 PM
Tons of men on here just want sex. It has nothing to do with if you're a single mom, a nurse or a teacher, overweight or thin, tall or short, white, black, or even PURPLE.. they want sex and they want it now!

Noteworthy careers don't seem to mean anything, either. The guys with these careers can be just as sleazy as ones who work at McDonald's.
 Stray__Cat
Joined: 7/12/2006
Msg: 3
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Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 8:12:08 PM
No. They hit on all the ladies.
Just ignore em and keep at it.

And you know...most guys are more respectful.
You just haven't been emailing em.
 _TALL_IQ2_
Joined: 2/10/2010
Msg: 4
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 8:22:16 PM
My question is, do men discount single moms as relationship material and go after the sex instead?

Ok let's discuss world events, go for a run, ride our bikes, play some tennis, and then play doctor...

IF you want an email buddy or a penpal, there are some guys who will pretend that's all they want, for a reverse psychology challenge to you, or just for a short while..
Plenty of gamers out there waiting to capture your ephemeral attention..

Then there actually ARE some men open to dating/relating with an attractive single mom, who has enough time for them when her kids are busy or with their father..

 MikScott
Joined: 5/7/2010
Msg: 5
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 8:42:26 PM
Wow, so i guess most guys that work at McDonalds are sleazy as compared to the guy who puts on a tie and carries a briefcase. Go figure. Its a shame to think he must be low life and sleazy cause he works at McDonalds. Geez, this could lead to a new thread altogether so i will just stop now.
 JustDeserts
Joined: 5/11/2012
Msg: 6
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 8:46:16 PM
Ha ha ha... I got that same message from a guy last week. I bet you it's the same guy. I'm from Mass. too. LOL
OMG that is just too f&cken funny!!!
 DeerTaint
Joined: 4/3/2012
Msg: 7
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 8:47:11 PM
Well that's shocking. Men wanting sex. It's not against the law. Look you have had sex at least 3 times since you have 3 kids. If you don't want to talk about anything sexual, put that in your profile.
 coyotefeller
Joined: 11/12/2011
Msg: 8
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Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 9:09:39 PM

My question is, do men discount single moms as
relationship material and go after the sex instead?

I think a lot of men want a relationship with lots of sex too !
 Ljj5911
Joined: 3/1/2012
Msg: 9
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 9:14:56 PM
Well sure we all want sex with dating, I was just surprised at the directness in his email. But then I guess at least he's being upfront about it. I figure you start with a drink and then go from there. But then with only 8 free days a month, he's thinking it will take forever to get to the 3 date point.
 The_Standard_Model
Joined: 7/14/2007
Msg: 10
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Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 9:26:50 PM
To be honest, I am always a little confused when women do this. Imagine a man is really, Really, REALLY interested in having sex. Whodathunkit?

Look, most mens primary motivator in dating is to have sex with women. We want relationships too, but we are going out often looking to score. Why would you act surprised when this comes up?

You answer it however you want to, but I would suggest that you say something along the lines of "Three dates in one night? I am not sure that you would want to pay for three dinner bills!" and laugh it off. Men will often gauge you to see if you are actually interested in having a sexual relationship. Sometimes they are just being playful. If the guy was as decent and great as you said, then I am not sure what the problem was here. He made a sexual joke. Big deal.
 Landra2
Joined: 6/4/2009
Msg: 11
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Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 9:34:32 PM
I don't know why women are so surprised that men want sex. Enough women are willing to enjoy it fairly quickly and easily with them that they figure they have a pretty good chance if they ask.

In fact, some women might be thrilled to find a man who was seemed bright, interesting, had a noteworthy career-- and was sexually hot for "her". A meeting, some drinks, some fun and getting laid. Who knows what could happen from there!?

If that's not you, no need to get in a huff about it.
 Ljj5911
Joined: 3/1/2012
Msg: 12
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 9:37:30 PM
canam miles- point taken. I guess my lesson here is to lighten up. I like your response suggestion...might just use that!
 justlookingvt
Joined: 5/8/2010
Msg: 13
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Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 9:54:51 PM
canam_miles reply is pretty good. If I were you, I'd be a little more devious and careful simultaneously and reply with something like "we wouldn't have enough time in one night for 3 dates because I like it slow".

You turn him down on his offer, you don't give him the chance to mention he can easily pay for the 3 meals and 2 of the meals could be had in bed. Instead, you may be suggesting that you like sex slow or may be suggesting that you like to take it slow. He'll have to figure that out.

I am betraying my gender!! :-))
 MaximumPower
Joined: 4/5/2012
Msg: 14
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 10:04:24 PM
If the guy doesn't pressure hard for sex the woman will call him g__. So it's the women's double standard.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 15
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 10:15:10 PM
My question is, do men discount single moms as relationship material and go after the sex instead?

No, but I'd discount any woman as relationship material if sex wasn't on the table early on.
 fillyphilly
Joined: 5/12/2012
Msg: 16
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 10:19:25 PM
I'm guessing it's your first date section, "dinner, drinks and then who knows?" If you're serious about this question I'd go to the profile review.
 Lovelyladyuno
Joined: 3/26/2012
Msg: 17
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 10:37:58 PM
Wow what did men do when women weren't having premarital sex??? Did they just die of misery? Men feel too entitled these days. It's disgusting! This lawless immoral society that we have, while more "free", creates constant confusion. What would happen if all unmarried women stopped having sex. What would single men do??? Would men have to "act like gentlemen" "not be sex crazed idiots". I know a guy, while he probably would like to have sex with me, I know deep down inside that he sees me as more than that and would like to know me as a person. How wonderful to know that all men aren't retards.
 christ on a crutch
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 18
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Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 11:33:15 PM
What would happen if all unmarried women stopped having sex. What would single men do???

continue banging the wives who cheat.
 abelian
Joined: 1/12/2008
Msg: 19
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/16/2012 11:37:24 PM
Wow what did men do when women weren't having premarital sex??? Did they just die of misery?

I dunno. I didn't grow up in that era.

Men feel too entitled these days.

Entitled? Hardly, unless you mean that I feel entitled to not date women who won't sleep with me quickly, in which I do feel entitled the same way everyone else is entitled to date whomever they wish. I'm sorry if that means those of you who wish to exercise your right to wait have fewer guys to choose from, but it's your choice. You are only entitled to wait if you're willing to accept the smaller dating pool you get as a result.

What would happen if all unmarried women stopped having sex.

Wishing the sisterhood would organize and accomodate your idea of making men wait for sex just isn't realistic.

What would single men do??? Would men have to "act like gentlemen" "not be sex crazed idiots".

I'd just hire escorts so I didn't have to put up with that crap.

I know a guy, while he probably would like to have sex with me, I know deep down inside that he sees me as more than that and would like to know me as a person.

If all you have to hold a guy is the promise of sex, then you really don't have anything else to offer. I get into relationships with women because they do have sex with me and I still find them interesting after having sex because of all of those other things they have. There's nothing interesting about a woman who thinks her only way to interest me is to hold out on sex. That just tells me she has nothing but sex to offer me and I wouldn't be interested in anyone who only has sex to offer me.
 mrblue0311
Joined: 9/17/2011
Msg: 20
Men Wanting sex right away??
Posted: 5/17/2012 1:48:45 AM
Part of it is your profile, Ljj5911. I mean, honestly, could you come up with anything shorter and that insinuates sex less? "Attractive fit woman" is how you describe yourself if you want guys to desire just your body. A sex ad says "Attractive fit woman". A dating profile says a bit more about one's personality! "Drinks, dinner and then who knows?" could be interpreted as "Drink, dinner, and then maybe we go back to my place and shag." Regardless, your profile is so short and substanceless that you give a guy no reason to be interested in dating you beyond sex. Not to mention decent guys who put effort in writing nice messages would be clueless as to what to write about you. As has been indicated, men like sex. Every woman regardless who she is and how she presents herself in your profile gets unwanted sexual propositions from some guys. Even the guys wanting relationships want sex as part of the deal. Now lots of guys out there are willing to try to build towards a relationship and not proposition you right away. But... when your profile is suggestive of just wanting something physical and does not advertise yourself as something more, you are basically advertising yourself as someone who wants sex and guys will message you as such. Get a profile with more substance if you want a relationship with more substance than mere shagging.
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