| | no communication,why?Page 1 of 2 (1, 2) | Ok, I've been dateing this girl for nearly over a year and she proposed to me, we got engaged, she wanted me to be in his sons life and such, so when I went to take pictures with him she moved so I was out of the photo, and when I asked her about it her response: I dont want to regret something I took" I was very hurt by that, the next day she dumps me because we hit a brick wall in our relationship and it wasnt going anywhere so she decided to end it, then she said she wanted to be friends via text, so we stay friends then all of a sudden she blows up on me when I ask how everything is going and wants me to stop contacting her, why?
ps- a few months before all this she had mixed feelings for her best friends ex husband, they started texting and such, she decided to stay with me, then a few weeks before all this mess he emails her wanting to buy her stuff? | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/11/2012 10:01:38 PM | Sounds like she did you a favor.
She's done with you, and is doing the new guy. She doesn't know what she wants. But.. you don't need to be around for her drama either. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 8:04:34 AM | | Why? Because she doesn't want contact with you. I think she's made that abundantly clear. It doesn't matter what the precise reasons are, only that this is what she wants. So you need to accept it and move on now. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 10:17:52 AM | | yea, its just hard, she had a personality about her I loved to find in a woman for years, she kept on my butt about stuff if I was lacking in something, and she wanted me to SAVE money, those are hard to find. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 3:10:31 PM | she had a personality about her I loved to find in a woman for years, she kept on my butt about stuff if I was lacking in something, and she wanted me to SAVE money, those are hard to find.
I'm not sure whether you're describing a nag or a saint.
Why don't you adopt those qualities in yourself so that you don't have to seek them in others?
Be your own nag and your own best support system--you sound a bit irresponsible and unmotivated.
She probably grew to resent you because she felt those were things you should be responsible for in the first place. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 6:03:44 PM | | So it seems for the past four months shes been wanting to date that guy she had mixed feelings for...so why play with me like that? | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 6:46:48 PM | | Because she was waiting to see how it worked out with the other guy? She was stringing you along meanwhile, so you could be the back-up guy if it fell through? | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 6:57:24 PM | | she claimed she didnt talk to him and didnt want to why she was with me....I hate being played...I've lost faith in women | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 7:04:37 PM | she claimed she didnt talk to him and didnt want to why she was with me....I hate being played...I've lost faith in women
Oh brother.
YOU stood there and watched the building burn around you.
YOU stayed and waited.
You chose all of this--it has nothing to do with all women being like this.
YOU stayed in touch instead of walking away and getting on with your life.
You are young, inexperienced, immature, and hurt.
Of course you want to blame women for the loss and hurt you feel.
Instead, why don't you look at this as the learning opportunity that it is.
Figure out what role YOU played in "being played." You are NOT the innocent bystander that you think you are.
Take responsibility for the people you allow in your life. Learn how to make better choices.
Or you are doomed to repeat this scenario again. Same scenario, different woman.
\/\/
:-) | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/12/2012 7:37:25 PM | | ouch, a little harsh, but maybe I am the better person in all this, and yes I did have my faults but I was working on fixing them. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/16/2012 4:52:54 PM | | well it seems in just three weeks after the relationship she is back to dateing ): | |
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knt3
| | Joined: 6/8/2012
Msg: 14 | |
| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/20/2012 5:41:26 AM | sounds like she found someone else better to take advantage of.
in time, you'll be happy that it's over between the two of you.
she was using you until something better came along and she'll do the same to him too.
she sounds like an opportunist.
be glad she's gone, she just wants someone to foot the bill and take care of her and her kid.
don't be surprised if somewhere down the line soon she texts you only to want you back, she will claim she made a mistake. lol... typical b*tch. | |
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knt3
| | Joined: 6/8/2012
Msg: 15 | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/26/2012 9:26:02 AM | Dont be sad...everything is gonna be ok...
Something like that happened to me, Im sad now but I'll try forget him...I know is hurt, but you have to do it
Good luck | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/26/2012 9:34:52 AM | All I know for sure is that "leftofnormal" is great counsel. I'd listen to her completely!
Life can be confusing for all of us, and in spite of our best or purest efforts, sometimes we are victimized by the hidden agendas of the truly troubled. Pretty girls can get away with more than any other genre of society. I have been in this same position, and her beauty was enough to make me stupid in wise pursuits. But there are very nice, loving, kind, beautiful, honest, amazing women ready to steady us.....and they truly are easy to find if you have something to offer them in return. What are your gifts! What are you trying to give to them? How do you relate with them? Are you happy with who you are? The good and bad news are the same.....this will happen again, you will love her, and she will leave....enjoy the ride, kid! It's all worth it, I promise! | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/26/2012 11:38:50 AM | | If it makes you feel any better, anyone who would date their "best friends" ex anything makes her a mega looser, not only as a girl friend, but as a friend period. Why waste time stewing over someone who aint thinking about anyone but herself. She is living rent free between your ears, just sayin..... | |
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hmmm15
| | Joined: 6/20/2012
Msg: 20 | |
| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/30/2012 1:55:18 PM | Unfortunately, as painful as this is, the truth is, she didn't want you. You're not the first to experience something like this, or the last. Women have this nurturing instinct to help people but in the end, we don't want to be a mom to someone, we want/need a partner. Someone we feel safe with, not someone we have to protect.
Let's focus on the positives here, shall we? : )
Your biggest asset here is time. You are so young. So you learned to save money, she didn't take that away when she left you. Stay on that positive track, finish your education and become the best you that you can be, then you'll have a lot more to offer in your next relationship. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 6/30/2012 9:59:23 PM | | Who knows why another person does anything. Just understand that she's not right for you. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 7/11/2012 9:16:55 PM | | Well it seems like she is dateing this guy now, she said we could be friends as long as I dont talk about what we are now, our past and who she is with or not with....thoughts anyone? her sister sees to think she wants to go out and mess around before settling down with me, its hard to understand since she proposed to me. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 7/11/2012 10:35:10 PM | Sometimes it's difficult to see our own situations because we're too emotionally embroiled.
When this happens to me, I try to look at my situation as if it's not my own.
I'll strip it down to the basic behaviors and look at it unemotionally.
So pretend this isn't happening to you.
What would you think of a random person who tells an ex,
"We can be friends as long as you keep quiet about our past."?
Does this sound right to you?
Is it a reasonable thing to request of someone?
Would YOU ever make that request of someone?
Would you respect or trust a random person who made that request?
What would you think of a random person who agreed to those terms?
I hope that helps.
My opinion: I don't think this is the right girl for you.
I think you deserve someone who enthusiastically, publicly, pridefully and lovingly declares her association with you.
Why would she have to hide anything about you?
Do you think she's embarrassed?
Or selfishly trying to keep you on the side without upsetting her current BF?
In any case, it's awful behavior. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 7/12/2012 7:59:33 AM | | LeftofNormal hit the nail on the head guy. Life can be harsh but you'll survive it. The next time you should see it coming. | |
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| no communication,why?
Posted: 7/13/2012 11:34:44 AM | | She played you, maybe not intentionally from the get go but it sounds like she was trolling for the next best or exciting thing. Been there, done that. My first wife let a good friend of mine move in after we were separated. Half of our arguements were because of his presence. My internal filter has been adjusted because of this. Let this be your learning experience. Good luck. | |
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