| | Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates? Page 1 of 6 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6) | Sorry I had to abbreviate in the title folks...
So reading the over 45, we hear about chemistry, alot, but there's so much less to choose from, & maybe less motivation for people to even enter relationships...
IF YOU REALLY WANT A RELATIONSHIP...wouldn't you consider:
if u r obese, dieting or getting bariatric surgery plus exercise & go to a gym?
If u r a man w/ facial hair, have u considered a clean shaven look?
If u r a man who is balding, would u shave ur head or get a weave etc?
If u r a woman w/ short hair, would u try growing it out or get extensions as to appear more feminine?
Would you cover the gray, or lighten it? Would u wear a push up bra & dress a little more "current"? (throw away those "mommy" jeans!) Use some makeup & polish your nails?
Guys would you cover ur gray?
Dental work, if ur teeth r not that great?
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If ur striking out on POF, maybe u need to update ur appearance?
Do not mean to offend, we all know someone who was in a dating rut until they lost 20 lbs or dyed their hair or shaved off a beard, etc.
Contacts/lasik to be free of glasses? | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:21:48 AM | Exactly, when I realized the extent to which men are visual creatures, I endeavored to make myself more appealing by losing forty pounds, growing my hair from a very short cut to a chin length bob (the longest style really possible for my thin, fine hair), started wearing more form-fitting clothes, and regularly wearing eye make-up and lipstick, as well as getting my nails done on occasion.
I feel that my efforts paid off because I'm with a truly wonderful man now, who does love me for my inner qualities, with or without make-up, nice clothes, or even hair (major hair loss recently), but who, because he is a guy WAS initially attracted because he thought I was absolutely delicious.
It hasn't changed who I am, I'm just happier and more feminine. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:27:56 AM | I would consider improvements that are within my own sense of reason.
(Modern hair and makeup- yes. Gym workout- yes. Plastic surgery- no.)
I like to like what I see in the mirror, and I like the compliments and appreciative looks I get.
If I'm feeling overweight, outdated, or frumpy, I don't feel like me.
I'm out dancing with the 50+ crowd every weekend and see too many women looking much older than their years because they're wearing clothes from 1998, have the same hair style for 20 years, etc. They look dated and old.
It's a shame because these women could look so vibrant, sexy and fit as they're dancing the night away.
But instead they look like faded housewives and schoolmarms. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:31:42 AM | I'm willing to do absolutely nothing for the sole and simple purpose of landing a man.
My ongoing committment to making the most of Who I Am -- with regard to all aspects of my health -- has everything to do with the value I place on whatever precious years lie ahead for me:)
And it is this approach to His own gift of Life beyond 45+ that I seek in My Special Man (where/when he arrives:) | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:38:38 AM | I'm not willing to do anything to land a man.
I did lose weight last year, but only because I
wanted to look nice for my daughter's wedding
and also my 60th birthday this year.
I wouldn't consider surgery, I don't wear a lot
of make up, I do like dressing nice though. My two
girlies keep me up-to-date so I don't look like some
of the frumpies I see that are my age. I do keep my
hair long and it's been the same for decades, but I like
it like that. I keep it colored and nicely trimmed.
I think I'm pretty okei with who I am.
I didn't have a problem meeting guys when I was looking.
I met a lot of really nice guys and I realize I'm single because
I choose to be.
I've gotten lazy about looking and selfish with my time.
I might change my mind later, but right now, life is good.
Oh and PS. I've just recently discovered shellac manicures and
I LOVE LOVE LOVE them.
:68:
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:50:45 AM | The object is to be the best you can be for yourself. If you look in the mirror and see an old, fat person, and it depresses you . . than do something about it. Lose weight. Surgery if grossly obese is a good thing. If a little plastic surgery makes you feel better about yourself, go for it. In the end, not only will you like more who you see in the mirror, but the more you like yourself, the more attractive you are likely to be for the opposite sex. So its not about the opposite sex per se, but that is surely a benefit when you do things for yourself.
For those who say they will not change for a guy . . hey its no skin off our noses. We won't lose any sleep if you are alone on weekends because you refuse to change your appearance just for a guy. Just sayin. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 11:55:33 AM | | Be the best you can be for yourself it so very true! When you feel better I think you present to others in a much more positive frame of mind. I do all the things you mention OP except plastic surgery and don't think I would entertain that. I see way too many folks, male and female let themselves go and they look so much older than they really are! Would I do it to get a man? Nope. I do what I do for myself and how I feel. If that gets me one fine, and if not, well it is what it is! lol | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 12:06:43 PM | From Wonder5750
No, if I can't find someone that likes me for who and what I am, I am not interested. I mean how long can you be what you aren't? People do the best they can, they are fake enough as it is on here (present company excluded of course). So No... I wouldn't change.
DITTO!
I spent most of my 20's doing what blonde angel suggests and yes it got me a man, but ultimately I wasn't 'me' and it all fell apart anyway. I would rather be 'me' and be alone, than be someone that I'm not. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 12:12:10 PM |
dont care what anybody else thinks
This is probably one of the most numerous lies told in the world. The only people who don't care what other people think are Sociopaths and Psychopaths. Granted, nobody should live their life for other people. On the other hand, all normal people feel good when other people like them, or respect them, or even admire them. That's part of being human. That being said, I agree that we should follow our own course in life. Rarely will you catch me in a tie unless necessary as part of my job. Some of my peers would never be caught without a tie. Its just what is important to you. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 12:26:30 PM | For those who say they will not change for a guy . . hey its no skin off our noses. We won't lose any sleep if you are alone on weekends because you refuse to change your appearance just for a guy. Just sayin.
I don't think anyone is losing sleep.
I am following my own course in life, and I do pretty much what I want that pleases me
and doesn't hurt anyone else. The guy I want is the one that wants me. I'm pretty sure
you'd like to be wanted for yourself as well. Unless of course you care what others think and you feel the need to change to attract someone.
If I cared what people thought, I probably wouldn't be on an online dating site.
I probably wouldn't post in forums and I'd probably make my posts more likeable.
I guess that must make me a sociopath or psychopath.
Which must also explain why you don't see me complaining about my lot in life.
But it doesn't explain why I'm well liked in my social circle and the work place.
I'm pretty sure my friends respect and admire me. I'm pretty sure most people in
here don't care either way...I'm neither special nor a particular trouble maker.
Yeppers...life is good. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 12:38:59 PM |
For those who say they will not change for a guy . . hey its no skin off our noses. We won't lose any sleep if you are alone on weekends because you refuse to change your appearance just for a guy. Just sayin.
Huh?
Why would you even think the person saying it would care about skin off others noses 'cos they said it?
Why do you assume the person saying it is alone on weekends?
Why would you think the person would worry about strangers losing sleep over their choices?
Just sayin'. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 1:18:11 PM | OK I admit to starting this thread for a couple of reasons, one is that some of the ladies & I write eachother & we discuss clothes, hair etc.
I've also noticed in the forums that the ones who complain the most about not having a date oftentimes could benefit from a makeover. The ones who do pair up, for instance Landra, Lilli M & another couple I know of who recently connected, all look like they take care of themselves & made themself very dateable appearance wise.
No offense meant to anyone, just food for thought- like Lilli says, men (& women) are visual & they did not change who they are, but tweaked an aspect or 2 of their look :0) Women too! | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 1:36:47 PM | I completely changed everything about physical appearance once I started the divorce process.
Looking back, it was because I was finally happy again. I have energy bursting at the seams now, even my ex- said I was back to my "old" self and he wanted to get back together. (that will never happen)
I do it all know, LOVE shellacked nails, always update my hair style, by form fitting clothes, hit the gym 5x per week. I haven't been happier, I will never go back to feeling as bad as I did when I was married.
I know men love long hair, but I like my hair this length so it's staying....for now :) | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 1:54:30 PM | See, I do not understand: why all this make-up, fake appearances?
What you have on your mind is more important. I have to laugh at ladies whom wear those tight garments to hide a large belly (to be kind): once you lift the skirt, or lower the pants, what do you think we are going to see?
Surprise!
No way we are going to make-out in the dark all the time. | |
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| Would U @ MiddleAge B willing 2 make a change in your appearance 2B more successful w/dates?
Posted: 6/22/2012 2:02:25 PM | I think you're talking about body shapers...I rarely wear them, they're uncomfortable. I invest in a few decent pairs of jeans that I love, much more comfey than body shapers and less restrictive, yet still do the trick.
I would not say that I am fake, I don't wear much make up, my nails are real, just polished and I like to color my hair, if I didn't take care of myself just to make someone like me more, that would be fake to me. | |
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