| | Ladies look but don't reply...Page 1 of 4 (1, 2, 3, 4) | So I have been pleasantly surprised that some of the ladies I have contacted have taken the time to look at my profile, but my problem is they don't seem to reply. It kind of suggests to me that my profile image must be ok, and I don't think i'm coming across as being rude, crude or desperate in my messages, so can someone tell me what it is I am doing wrong...
Could it be simply be that I'm 'punching above my weight', as in the ladies i like are 'out of my league'?
I really would like to know if anyone has any thoughts,
all the best people and good luck with your own searches... | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/29/2012 11:53:13 PM | You say they look at your profile, after you have messaged them, and then they don't reply. So maybe, the ladies you message don't like what they read.
I read it, and I think it sounds fine. Everyone is different, just because some don't reply, doesn't mean someone else won't.
Maybe they think you are too far away, or they don't like smoking. It could be any number of things.
Don't give up. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 12:55:27 AM | I always regard a look with no follow-on as a 'no'.
At least they looked!
When they tried to make viewed me a pay feature, you had no idea if anything was going on, kinda destroyed the site, IMO.
I never, ever, follow up a 'no response look' - it smacks of desperation with overtones of 'stalker' to me...just sayin'
 | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:34:38 AM | The "Wall of Angels", or who's viewed me pages as they are more often refered too, are a productive place to fish. There had to have been 'something' about your photo or profile that appealed to them in the first place to make them look. (That assumes they are not just serial browsers of course). That many of the girls who look do not then go on to message you is only to be expected. Girls are far less likely to write first especially given that many already have any number of men, both suitable and unsuitable ones, sending them contact messages regularly.
If you can write a half decent first contact message you should go ahead and drop them a line, you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Some of the most intesting and enjoyable people I have met on here has been as a result of me sending a message after they appeared on my Angel wall. Good luck OP............GP | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:46:45 AM | OP .. Looking is just that.. we look at lots of things but don't necessarily want them (that slug in my garden for instance). I think you will just have to be patient. Not everyone will fall for your puppy dog eyes (maybe have a photo of you smiling?) .. you smoke (eliminates loads of women and they don't see that til they click on your profile).. or you might live in the wrong area (forgive me, I am a country bumpkin and have no idea about London whatsoever, other than the shops are great and the Queen lives there). I think we all often click on a photo and then realise that there is something that sticks out like a sore thumb that really doesn't suit. Keep looking.
As for "Angel wall".. dear god.. pass me a bucket.. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:49:43 AM |
The "Wall of Angels", or who's viewed me pages as they are more often refered too, are a productive place to fish. There had to have been 'something' about your photo or profile that appealed to them in the first place to make them look. (That assumes they are not just serial browsers of course). That many of the girls who look do not then go on to message you is only to be expected.
Sorry, but I disagree and think that is a bit deluded. If someone looks at your profile, but doesn't follow up by writing to you, then yes..."something about your photo" appealed to them... But it is a small thumbnail photo and clearly - as demonstrated by their lack of follow-up message - the full-size photo and/or profile details did not live up to expectations.
If the woman was very keen, but did not want to send the first message, trust me - she would find a way of letting you know e.g. adding you as a Favourite int the hope you would contact her.
Bit harsh, but we've all experienced it. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 2:58:55 AM | | If you sent a message, then you will tend to look at the profile anyway. And some of us like reading profiles, but it might be something on there that says not to bother, such as too far, has young children or not working or a smoker. You will not attract all people, so no point wondering why they dont reply or even message. I will say, however, that I do look at profiles and think that perhaps they wont be interested in me so wont message, but that doesn't mean to say that I would not like a message. Some people might be my age for instance and they might say something like 'am young looking or am a 20yr old at heart', which tells me that they actually want a younger person. So all sorts of assumptions can be made on a profile. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 3:30:55 AM | It all depends on the message quality.
I had one nice looking bloke offer me his number after 3 messages( all in one day and that being the first day we typed) using an excuse of this site wears my phone battery out.
Another just asked what am i up to and where am i from.
Maybe it's due to not being that interested in online dating these days or the fact i prefer someone to read my profile. Comment on that and we can go from there. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 3:37:59 AM |
As for "Angel wall".. dear god.. pass me a bucket..
Concurred..... Jesus wept that's borderline creepsville. I'm sure the women on here would name theirs the wall of w4nkers.
If they've looked at you they've looked at you, it means nothing else....other than they don't know how to browse hidden. If they're the shy type then maybe there's something in it...but i don't like the shy types anyway. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 3:43:03 AM | I had a quick look because the thumbnail pic isn't all that easy to see.
I operate in stealth mode though.
I'd say they were just having a look and if they don't reply aren't interested for whatever reason. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 3:52:13 AM |
As for "Angel wall".. dear god.. pass me a bucket
Concurred..... Jesus wept that's borderline creepsville
And yet my having that mindset gets superb results so the advice I offered to the OP remains good advice regardless of the attempts to Troll me. Go figure, ha ha ha | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 4:04:04 AM |
And yet my having that mindset gets superb results so the advice I offered to the OP remains good advice
And yet you're still here, let me guess.....you're fussy right? or are you a bit of a player shagging his way through his "wall of angels"? | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 4:07:33 AM | | i look at everyone who "views " me just because i dont send a massage it dosnt mean nothing ,, im lazy or busy ect .. just go with the flow x | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 4:10:58 AM | ha ha ha, crappy guess mate which you could have figured out all by yourself if you had understood what I meant by 'mindset'. I'm here because I love it here, I'm a writer and this place inspires me like no other. The fact that being here brings amazing people, and a few Trolls, into my life is just a bonus, but thanks for your interest in me and my motivations as wrong as they were.......GP
vvv Then we measure success in different ways do we not?, I get just what I need and in the right amounts to consider myself to be successful without having found the right girl for me yet, just sayin'.....
vvvv Of course I do, you are all stars in my eyes.........(and Angels, ha ha ha). And PS, I never said everyone loves poetry, I mearly stated the truth that it can, probably more than anything else, get replies from girls or cause them to message you first.......
I suspect a bloke having a decent body and looking fantastic gets more messages.. just saying.
Is that not the category I also fall into as well as being a good poet and writer? lol | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 4:11:23 AM | "And yet my having that mindset gets superb results"
Yes, of course.. thats why you are still here, saying the same thing about 50% of your emails are replied to.. blah blah.. everyone loves poetry blah blah.. As I've set before.. "results" and "success" mean diddlysquat when you are still on a dating site and haven't actually met anyone who gets you off the treadmill. I will judge my success on being in a happy relationship thanks.
Edit: Oh and now you are here just looking at us all through your writer's eye eh? Jeesh...
Yep, sure, thats as good as an excuse as any for not finding anyone..
"I mearly stated the truth that it can, probably more than anything else, get replies from girls or cause them to message you first......."
How do you know that is the "truth"? Is that like Scientology truth? You have no idea, without conducting a proper survey what gets more replies, etc. I suspect a bloke having a decent body and looking fantastic gets more messages.. just saying. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 5:05:45 AM | It's a heart-rending, but all too common complaint OP.
You will realise this, after you have spent a little more time here.
People decide they would like another/a partner, so they open an account, they write something 'interesting', or perhaps 'revealing', about themselves, how "unique" we all are, and then in a final act of desperation, stick up a few pictures, which show you in your best, and hopefully most attractive pose.
They pout, they smoulder, they skydive and bungee-jump, they stand in front of pyramids, or on top of mountains. They hold fish, they straddle motorbikes, or lounge on sports cars, they dress-up in 'whacky' costumes, they surround themselves with their many friends and well-wishers, pets, children, family, and adoring public.
They "put themselves out there".
Most of all, they unashamedly and publicly declare; "look at me, I'm a great catch, I'm worthy of "love" too, and in return, I too, will give you, "somebody", anybody" my own unconditional love*."
(*Provided you meet my own very strict and exclusive list of requirements, measurements, statistics, credit-checks, screen-tests, blood-tests, genealogy, geography, fashion-sense, financial-viability, fitness, and fvckability. [subject to status. Not a guarantee. Terms and conditions may vary])
Surely such bravery deserves some sort of recognition..?
Surely the mere viewing of of a profile constructed by such a person, followed by an acknowledgment of receipt of said viewing, by the viewee, saying "I know. I saw you look. You want me bad, right..?" should 'seal the deal'. ?
Sadly, no. 
Just as in "real life", people will often glance at you, simply to avoid bumping into you.
It doesn't mean they "want you".
And if someone doesn't answer a message, just 'move-on'.
or give up. 
 | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 5:30:55 AM | | I think I'm slightly in love with Jo Van.. (only slightly, as I don't know height and schlong measurements yet) | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 5:48:54 AM | Lots of approaches to this it seems.
But there are no broad brush absolutes.
If I send a hello that provokes a view of my profile or get what I would call an "unsolicited" profile view I always thank them for coming to look. its nice to have an acknowledgement of your existence on here. An individuals interest may or may not have been piqued. And most of the time my thankyou message is the final communication. Fine. Leave it there. But sometimes it has also provoked a response along the lines of "Nice profile" or "Thanks for messaging again it would be nice to chat" and these have led to further chats.
So, some may see my thankyou message as me being a pest. And some think it is nice. it's down to the individual. I happen to be an individual too. And I think that's the key thing on here OP...just play this game how you want to play it - be an individual. The vast majority on here are likely not to play it your way and won't see you as you want to be seen but that's fine. Jo Van describes the general situation very well. But it doesn't apply to everybody. If your intent is genuine, you're only looking for one special person. Part of that specialness is that they click with you...so whatever approach you decide to take will have worked.
Best of luck :-) | |
|
| |
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 6:12:57 AM | "Wall of Angels? Fcuk me down dead. "Wall of Munters" more like, and if most of them fell off said wall , then all the King's Horses and etc etc etc. Graffiti , it probably works for you, others like myself and Woz I dare say, like to apply the quality not quantity filter.
@ OP , Chap, women approach online dating like shopping for shoes or handbags. Ever been dragged on a shopping expedition by a partner? What do women do, do they buy for the first thing they see? Never . If I met one that did, she'd be Mrs HappyChappie no dramas. What they do, is look, poke, prod, procrastinate, ring a mate, send photo of item to mate for a second opinion, anything but just throw readies over a counter and buy the bloody item. Women like to turn a very simple task into an epic experience. What do they do at the end? Go back and buy the first bloody thing they saw 4 hours later.
That's how they approach online dating. Your hope, is that you're the first item they saw. It makes no difference what your profile says, unless you come across as a punchy tosser. If they like the look of you, they'll buy.
So, think about what attracts women when they shop, and act accordingly. | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 7:12:39 AM | Msg 20, well said
they trade their husband in after 7/8years only to find another one to do exactly what they did with the first husband. (the grass is greener)
till death us do part should be replaced with until i find someone better or there's a sale on. lol | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 7:18:24 AM | Msg 20 is bang on.
Reminds me of confused nightclub experiences as a youth, but I hated nightclubs, but at least I can have my own music in this one... | |
|
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 7:26:00 AM | | I have the same problem, I send a girl a message, she checks out my profile but does nothing. (in most cases) | |
|
| |
| Ladies look but don't reply...
Posted: 6/30/2012 7:47:08 AM |
I mearly stated the truth that it can ........
Is that not the category I also fall into as well as being a good poet and writer? lol
I think the first rule of being a good writer is buy a dictionary.
If someone has looked at my profile and then messaged me I will more often than not look at theirs. If they have blatantly ignored the age criteria and messaged me regardless, I tend to ignore them for that reason.
I treat every message on merit and ignore or respond accordingly.
 | |
|
Home
login 
