| | QuestionsPage 1 of 1 | When youre interested in someone do you generally use your first phone conversation to ask them questions about themselves? Their family history? Their jobs etc?
I was speaking to a gentleman and he seems to be not interested in asking anything about me and was somewhat secretive what does that mean?
It was our first conversation, should I even continue trying to have another? | |
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Posted: 7/4/2012 11:36:51 PM | I assume you've communicated in other ways besides on the phone, was he interested in asking anything then?
Its not a good sign (typically), but there could be other reasons, such as being tired, busy, frustrated at other things etc etc.
Talk to him one more time and see if anythings different. If not, move on. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 12:54:36 AM | | obvious player, only wants sex, trolls college bars at closing time for passed-out drunks to roll, the usual. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 1:35:37 AM | Communication styles vary. What you're "used to" and what he's "used to" are obviously different.
Not every guy knows that the trick, is to ask lots of questions and make her do most of the talking.
His social skills may not be as finely tuned. So it's possible that he's just allowing you to offer up what you WANT him to know?!?!?!
If you're not heavily bothered by his style, then ride the wave and see where it leads.
Otherwise, move on. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 1:50:58 AM | | I don't think it's enough to judge yet. Personally I can communicate well online and in person, but am terrible at phone conversations. I'd hate to hear what assumptions 'christ on a cruch' up there would make after one of my phone conversations. lol. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 2:36:02 AM | In the first conversation, he should have asked one or two questions, if he were interested, that is.
If this isn't the case, he's not worth making the effort to initiate another conversation. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 3:43:38 AM | When youre interested in someone do you generally use your first phone conversation to ask them questions about themselves? Their family history? Their jobs etc?
No. I use the first call, just to get a general sense of them, the sound of their voice, how interactive and responsive they are, that sort of thing. No sense asking a batch of probing questions that I could have already learned through messaging, if I met them through here, for example.
he seems to be not interested in asking anything about me and was somewhat secretive what does that mean?
"Somewhat secretive" is your interpretation of how he was. I don't know what that means. I've overheard enough conversations that have later been described in ways that I considered to be woefully off the mark, that I am skeptical about anyone's judgments. If in conversation one, you thought it was appropriate to ask HIM about his parentage, his income, etc, then I can understand why he might have been a little cautious, again, depending on what went on before through other messaging means.
It was our first conversation, should I even continue trying to have another?
Probably not, if this one made you paranoid enough to post a thread about it. Whether he's a S.A.B. with a players agenda or not, you're already down on him, and not in a fun way. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 5:25:42 AM |
was speaking to a gentleman and he seems to be not interested in asking anything about me and was somewhat secretive what does that mean?
Yes, you should trust your gut on this one. He is secretive. He is probably married. Avoid him at all costs. He just wants sex.
should I even continue trying to have another?
No!!!! he is looking for sex!!! avoid him!!!
I have seen your posts before, so you dont over anyalize anything. So make sure you dont on this one either. Just dump him, dont talk to him, he is looking for sex, or married. Very secretive.... | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 6:46:22 AM | | It depends. You feel them out with such questions via email & IM to reach a comfort level, prior to an initial phone conversation, if you met them online. I'd be suspicious & probably move on had I met someone offline & they seemed secretive over the basics of their lives. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 6:49:30 AM | You talk on the phone?
I would only do that if the person lives far away. Otherwise, we can save all that talking for the date | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 6:59:46 AM |
When youre interested in someone do you generally use your first phone conversation to ask them questions about themselves? Their family history? Their jobs etc?
I was speaking to a gentleman and he seems to be not interested in asking anything about me and was somewhat secretive what does that mean?
It was our first conversation, should I even continue trying to have another?
You are over thinking this. Just go with the flow. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 8:31:16 AM | | I hate phone conversations with someone I have never met. I personally would much rather just meet the guy than have to talk on the phone. Agree with above poster, just meet him and see and make your own impressions. If he is still not forthcoming or asking any questions, he is involved already with someone else and just wants sex. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 8:40:01 AM |
IgorFrankensteen
"Somewhat secretive" is your interpretation of how he was. I don't know what that means. I've overheard enough conversations that have later been described in ways that I considered to be woefully off the mark, that I am skeptical about anyone's judgments.
+1 on that. I am sometimes amazed by what people think they heard, versus what was actually said. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 9:13:55 AM |
When youre interested in someone do you generally use your first phone conversation to ask them questions about themselves?
No.
I use the "first phone call" to ask them out on a date.
Where we may talk about family history, jobs, etc.
Or something else entirely.
I was speaking to a gentleman and he seems to be not interested in asking anything about me and was somewhat secretive what does that mean?
That maybe he didn't want to sit there and chat on the phone.
That maybe he was focused more on trying to figure out what things "meant" to you.
Like "OMG! She wants to talk on the phone, is that like more 'serious' than like chatting via email and text? OMG I don't know what's going on! Does that mean she like wants a commitment?"
Or maybe he was thinking "ugh. I hate talking on the phone. But she wants to talk on the phone. But I don't want to get into the habit of sitting here being interviewed on the phone before she deigns to bequeath upon me her presence for an hour on a date so maybe if I act a little aloof she will figure out I don't want to talk on the phone."
Or maybe he lives in bad cell reception area and he was chatting for the entire time, you just couldn't hear him.
It was our first conversation, should I even continue trying to have another?
It was your very first conversation with him?
Does that mean he chose you randomly out of the phone book and called you? | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 9:22:36 AM | | meet in person and take it from there | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 9:38:27 AM | To answer the question.
Most women, even with first meets don't like to be "interrogated". Bottom line, if the conversation flow is good, the information will come with time.
Here is the more important question that should be asked: Do you enjoy his company? | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 9:42:44 AM | I would ask those questions only if I ran out of fun things to discuss.. if I am resorting to those questions early on its not going well.. lots of uncomfortable silences.
Bring up interesting fun topics.. dont make it like an interview.. no one likes those. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 10:10:16 AM | If he is still not forthcoming or asking any questions, he is involved already with someone else and just wants sex.
Where the Hell did THIS come from?!?! If a guy doesn't spill his guts during a conversation or meeting to someone HE DOESN'T KNOW WELL and he's not enough of a nosy son of a _____ for you, HE'S WITH SOMEONE ELSE AND JUST WANTS TO BANG YOU ON THE SIDE?! Astounding. Absolutely astounding. Stupid, but astounding. | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 10:38:22 AM |
When youre interested in someone do you generally use your first phone conversation to ask them questions about themselves? Their family history? Their jobs etc?
It's best to save most those questions for the first date. it will give you more to talk about :)
I was speaking to a gentleman and he seems to be not interested in asking anything about me and was somewhat secretive what does that mean?
He's a married man.
It was our first conversation, should I even continue trying to have another?
If you're interested in him why the hell not? | |
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Posted: 7/5/2012 12:56:33 PM | Stupid, but astounding.
Stupid? Don't think so hon. Stupid is thinking you will actually attract a woman 45 years old and younger, old man. | |
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