| | We broke up and he threatened to report me stealingPage 1 of 2 (1, 2) | He and I dated for over 3 years. When we broke up 4 months ago he moved his ex wife and 2 kids into his house and rented an apt for himself. Ever since we got back together he still goes over to his house every morning to shower, change clothes etc. he still has majority of his personal items there. he also goes there three evenings a week to hang with his kids and their mom for dinner etc.
I'm very supportive of him seeing his kids, even everyday if he wants. I just don't want he and his ex get too close. Although I know they don't have physical contact(Plz don't question this as I know for the fact). I asked him to move his personal items to the apt he said they don't fit. I asked him to move his clothes to the apt and shower here he said its too uncomfortable(it's not as nice as the shower in his house). He basically told me he is not sure if he can do that bcos he likes the convenience of his house and likes the flexibility to see his kids any time he wants.
For the past 3 or 4 days we have been discussing this and no progress. Sometimes he says he can do it sometimes he says he needs time and not sure sometimes he says he is pushed to the corner. Last night he went to their house again and stayed there until 10pm then asked me to pick him up from near their house bcos he drank and couldn't drive(he was not drunk though). I was upset and I called his ex wife and to find out the truth yesterday. she yelled at me saying I scared her 10 year old son who was beside her when i called. It was intense on the phone. He got really upset saying all I do is to hurt him and cancelled our weekend plan. The next day I found out he is taking her and their son on weekend trip.
Since my car is in another state right now and he was letting me borrow his car for the past 3 days. When we broke up this morning he asked me to return his car immediately. I asked him since I'm kinda far from him today if I can return his car on Monday. He said "are you going to make me report it stolen?" I told him I'm far right now then he said if he doesn't get it by 5pm today he is going to report it stolen.
I'm going to have to cancel my plan and drive 3 hours back to return the car to him today, I'm just very disappointed. What could I have done differently to make the result different? | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:38:34 PM | Drive the car to the nearest police station, tell the guy at the desk that some psycho let you borrow it then is demanding you drive it somewhere else or he will report it stolen, it's just too crazy. Bye.
You are his mistress, nothing more. Accept that or move on. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:39:54 PM | ^^^ why dabble in deceit when the truth is her best defense?
I wouldn’t worry too much about the ‘stolen car’ complaint or a charge arising from that. Do you have a history of emailing this guy at all? Can you send him an email saying thanks for lending you the car, you’d like to return but you’re far away, it’s inconvenient on such very short notice, however he’s welcome to come get it himself?
If he responds to that in any way at all, I think you’ll have a record that you haven’t stolen the car. That’s ridiculous anyway since you've had a domestic relationship and he’d look like a crank to the police and to a judge – if not be open to a charge of some kind of legal mischief himself if he took it that far.
I won’t even get into how you could have avoided the rest of this business. He sounds a bit irrational right now. But I can relate to a guy who will take every minute with his kids that he can, under almost any circumstances. Almost.
This is a messy business. Are you in a position to cut your losses emotionally and move on? I don't see this turning into anything good anytime soon. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:49:18 PM | | This isn't the first post about this guy, from you. It's all negative. Are you going to learn?Get his car back to him[ where there is a will, there is a way] and move on. I sure as heck would not put up with that sh it.Respect yourself...he sure isn't. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:51:37 PM | Wow, look at all of the details you left out of your other threads seeking pity and attention.
It's not your car it is his, return his car or go to jail. It's really that simple! | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:53:56 PM | Well which is it?
we broke up 4 months ago.
3 days ago you said he was your current bf.
On July 11, you wrote
Posted: 7/11/2012 7  54 AM My bf is divorced with 2 kids. He is 41, I'm 32 no kid. We have been together for 3 years. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:57:24 PM | #1- give him the car or go to jail
#2- quit posting about him on a public site
it might just come back to bite you in the azz
#3- get over it already, you wasted enough time
Are you not tired of your own drama yet?
If thats the case find another loser to treat you like crap,
so we can hear all about it once again.
The only person that can help you is YOU. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 12:58:59 PM | Why lament over what you have no control over and this man and his life is one thing that you do not and should not even entertain controlling it. The only real person you can control is yourself, and now it is time to do so.
He wants you part time, his wife part time, and his kids more often, so he is playing the juggling game in order to please himself and all those around him. He is still married and you need to understand that, deal with it, and tell him to let you know when he is free and ready to try to connect and have a relationship. Most of us know that those going through a divorce, need at least a year to get their life in order, and start the healing process for future relationships and a life.
All you have now is a sometimes bed partner, and nothing more, so if you are good with that then continue on, but do it with your own place, your own car, your own life and do not try to tell this man what he should do......do what you should do for yourself......Move on and get a real life!
cd | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:06:44 PM |
He wants you part time, his wife part time, and his kids more often, so he is playing the juggling game in order to please himself and all those around him. He is still married and you need to understand that, deal with it, and tell him to let you know when he is free and ready to try to connect and have a relationship. Most of us know that those going through a divorce, need at least a year to get their life in order, and start the healing process for future relationships and a life.
he is already divorced 2 years. He used to tell me he was just trying to help her. Its just recently that he moved her in about 4 months ago when we broke up. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:10:11 PM |
#1- give him the car or go to jail
#2- quit posting about him on a public site
it might just come back to bite you in the azz
#3- get over it already, you wasted enough time
I already broke up with him. I just wonder what I possibly could have done better. He invited me to his family reuntion on July 4th for a week, I couldn't say he was just playing me. It's difficult after 4 years, I'm sure you guys know that.
Maybe sometimes I wonder if it's my fault, is it really bad to reflect when your long term relationship comes to the end? | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:11:50 PM |
All you have now is a sometimes bed partner, and nothing more, so if you are good with that then continue on, but do it with your own place, your own car, your own life and do not try to tell this man what he should do......do what you should do for yourself......Move on and get a real life!
please don't assume something which you don't know. I have a great job, I have my own car and my own place. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:12:09 PM | From your previous post about him:
Posted: 7/11/2012 6  42 PM My bf and I have been together for over 3 years. He is divorced with kids. I have no kid. 4 months ago, his ex-wife moved in to his house with their kids, because she doesn't work and couldn't afford a house. My bf rented an apt for himself. My bf was actually happy about it, because before that happened he only had every Wednesday and every other weekend, now he can go over there any time he wants to see his kids. My bf and I stay together in the apt, and he goes over to his house every other evening or at least twice a week to see his kids and spend dinner together. He comes home every night. Since majority of his personal items are still in the house, and there is no washer/dryer in this apt, he goes to his house every morning to shower/change clothes.
The story seems to change each time...
he is already divorced 2 years. He used to tell me he was just trying to help her. Its just recently that he moved her in about 4 months ago when we broke up.
Just return his car as soon as you can... | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:19:49 PM | He might be able to have it impounded by the police stolen, or borrowed (depending on local laws).
He can have it towed to any location he wishes so I would get my things out of it.
I speak from experience, because I had to do that myself on two occasions, in two different states.
I had AAA tow MY car to my house from an old boyfriends place of employment.
The ignition switch was easier to replace then getting the keys, or the car. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:23:39 PM | | This relationship simply isn't working for you. It's one drama after another. As you have a car of your own, you don't need his. Hand it back, walk away and don't look back. No one needs this level of stress, uncertainty and upset in their life. Choose to leave it behind. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:26:25 PM |
I have a great job, I have my own car and my own place.
then LOSE this wandering, headgaming weiner...let his ex and kids have him. Find a guy that wants to be with ONLY you, or stay single, even.
Either you have no backbone, you're a drama addict or this is something you are just making up because you really DON'T have a life .
Yup, you are gonna have to change your plans and return this mans' car to him. I know other posters have said that the police will not charge you if you explain the situation-but do you want to take the chance?
Return the guys' car. Go back to your own place. Get your own car out of the shop or wherever. And forget this guy. Don't date him, don't talk to him, don't let him in your door. Yeah, you wasted 4 yrs on a non-starter-don't waste even another 4 minutes on him. Use your newly found spare time to get some counseling/life coaching.
Cindy O | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:26:44 PM |
Posted By: ashleyfor2 on 7/14/2012 3  50 PM Subject: We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing Message: All you have now is a sometimes bed partner, and nothing more, so if you are good with that then continue on, but do it with your own place, your own car, your own life and do not try to tell this man what he should do......do what you should do for yourself......Move on and get a real life! please don't assume something which you don't know. I have a great job, I have my own car and my own place.
What you do not seem to have, however, is any perspective on how messed up your life seems to those who read your posts.
There appears to be basically nothing good for you going on with this guy-he's still attached to his ex, he has no intention of marrying you or fathering a child with you, and he's willing to try to get you into legal trouble. It seems really obvious to readers that he is totally and completely USING YOU! Most people feel guilty about breaking up with some one they care about--he treated you like trash and threatened you.
Please, demand a LOT better from the next man in your life. Read up on healthy relationships--and esp. about setting your OWN boundaries and enforcing them. Simple things like, "I will not date someone who hangs out and drinks with his ex wife on a regular basis," or "I will not date someone who suggests I use a sperm donor." These are starting points. But really, some of us are a bit more protective of ourselves and won't date men who raise their voice in anger, or habitually waste our time by being late, or who call us names or swear at us (just some examples). We insist on being treated respectfully, or we move on. | |
|
| |
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 1:54:32 PM | | OP, you are for sure some kind of drama queen and pot-stirrer. Another thread about your troubles with your so-called boyfriend. Why the hell are you with this guy? And why is he with you? Are both of you addicted to your toxicity, or do you just thrive on negative attention? | |
|
| |
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 2:27:08 PM | Let him report it stolen. Return it as you had planned originally.
There are no charges or consequences that will stick as this guy is your ex-BF.
Tell him if he wants it by 5 to come get it. | |
|
| |
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 2:38:27 PM |
Drive the car to the nearest police station, tell the guy at the desk that some psycho let you borrow it then is demanding you drive it somewhere else or he will report it stolen, it's just too crazy. Bye.
You are his mistress, nothing more. Accept that or move on.
EXCELLENT ADVICE ....LotusTemple
He's been having 2 cakes at the same time and all the sugar has turned him into a psycho, so OP...........best to bow out and drop the car at the nearest police station. You don't want to get picked up by police trying to make the drive back by 5:00 p.m.
If you re-kindle the relationship with this psycho.........then I simply gotta question your sanity as well. Good Luck OP. | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 2:52:44 PM | ^^^^I don't get the impression that the man is a psycho.
I do think that the OP thrives on drama,
and is a 'bunny' short of being in a sequel to fatal attraction.
The advice to return the car to the nearest police station is good advice.
I called his ex wife and to find out the truth yesterday. she yelled at me saying I scared her 10 year old son who was beside her when i called. It was intense on the phone.
Is the next topic by the OP going to be "My EX got a restraining order against me"? | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 2:55:29 PM | if I can return his car on Monday. He said "are you going to make me report it stolen?"
What's new? Your other thread claims he has called the cops on you at least 10 times! 
he is already divorced 2 years.
It's difficult after 4 years, I'm sure you guys know that.
Well, at least you had four years of bliss - two of them, he was even divorced! 
I was upset and I called his ex wife and to find out the truth yesterday. she yelled at me saying I scared her 10 year old son
O.K. Now you have squelched any semblance of sanity. Calling his wife is out of control. You sound crazy. I hope you get out of this mess before you do land in jail! | |
|
| We broke up and he threatened to report me stealing
Posted: 7/14/2012 3:47:43 PM |
What could I have done differently to make the result different?
By not getting back together with him. You broke up the first time for a reason, remember?
For God's sake, bring his car to him, and get this nut completely out of your life forever. Load up any of his stuff that you have in the car, too. He wants to be with his ex-wife, anyway, so let him.
And don't date again until your picker is fixed. | |
|
Home
login 
