| | 200ish emails...no datesPage 1 of 1 | Lay it on me...serious. I've I've sent about two hundred emails and been on no dates lol. I've probably only had ten responses?
I have no idea what I'm doing wrong. I've got the serious face looking away from the camera, pics of doing interesting things, and the dog picture. Clearly I'm not as funny as I think I am in my profile or I'm just damn ugly and lurpy. To be brutally honest I thought I was at least a 6 or 7 and could attract at least that. This is rediculous lol.
Help me out! | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 7/15/2012 10:22:23 AM | I didnt think the profile was that bad honestly. You have decent pics. Your not bad looking. Your 28 so figure there are probably 7 to 10 guys per female in your age range. 90 percent of them are all messaging the hot looking women. Are you messaging mostly the hotties or also the "cute" ones. You described yourself as a 6 or 7. Is that your target audience also?
Are you messages personalized? Not stupid "How are u?" or "Would you like 2 chat?" messages. You say you sent 200 msgs and you have been a member only like 7 days. Hoping you are actually crafting personal msgs here not spamming copy and paste generic msgs. If the same message can be sent to multiple women its Spam.
Cowboy | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 7/15/2012 10:42:10 AM | Better pics would help. Eye contact and a smile would help. Pics 2-6 all have issues with them.
<-- click my History for my pic guidelines.
Most women prefer men who are clean shaven, they have more tolerance for full thick beards than short stubble or goatees.
The Headline is kind of negative.
Not completing your Interests or First Date shows a lack of effort or seriousness. Also doesn't make you look very interesting.
Can you post an example of some messages?
Keep Fishing!  | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 7/15/2012 10:42:12 AM | A few easy fixes and you’ll be off to the races. Delete the self image of you in the bathroom mirror; many women will stop and move on to the next profile right there (now you’ll get 1 in 100 to respond). The dog picture only benefits those who have a dog, get a dog or get rid of the picture (now you’ll get one in 80 to respond).
I also make a killer shrimp scampi? That's right! Shrimp scampi!! lol. Are you impressed yet? No? Wait I'm not done yet..
But then you are done… or at least you quit writing about it. This is confusing (a fix and you’ll get 1 in 75 to respond)
let's just get some coffee already.
Sounds like you’re rushing and will push for a first date before she’s ready. (delete and you’ll get 1 in 65 to respond)
Add a first date which shows you are creative and will tailor the date to the lady (just don’t say it directly using those words). Now you’re at 1 in 50 responses. Like I said – off to the races! | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 7/15/2012 12:54:22 PM | I think maybe it should be "run long AND prosper", no?
The first line of the shrimp scampi paragraph shouldn't be a question.
A sexy smile looking directly into the camera is more effective than the "I'm so bored, yet pensive" pose you have now. Girls want to see eyes and teeth. I couldn't care less about the dog, but it's good you're also in the picture with it for those that do care.
You completely missed the Interests field. This should be at least 8-12 one or two word items that describe your favourites. ie: Music group, genre or artist, food or cuisine, holiday spot, place you want to go or have been, movie type or Director, tv show, comedian, weekend activity... clues!
The profile body itself was OK.
I'm going to cut-and-paste some notes I made from another thread on sending first messages. The guy had "Fishing" as an Interest:
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Try this template which may help you get over the 'writer's block' for first messages:
Message: 3-4 sentence at most, light humoured, including 1 question only so she has an easy way to respond. Sign only your first name.
Do not say:
- Hi, Hey, Hello or How are you (wastes time)
- I read your profile (should be obvious)
- you're cute/pretty/beautiful (creepy in a first message)
- let's meet up for .... (again, creepy/pushy in a first message)
- check me out and email me back ( they know what to do already)
- hope to hear from you soon (sounds like begging/desperate)
Don't blather on about yourself - your profile is supposed to give information about you.
If I were writing to you, I'd use the specific interest of Fishing. Actually, that is the exact interest I used when I first wrote to my (now) husband.
Message: I just learned how to fly fish, but haven't actually caught anything yet. I much prefer spincast river fishing - fewer casualties! Have you been out yet this season? YGF
See? No pressure, obviously I read your profile, open a conversation, easy way to respond if you choose. | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 7/15/2012 3:04:05 PM | | The breast cancer fundraiser pic is your best. Use that as your profile photo. | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 7/15/2012 7:07:26 PM | Your profile isn't poor. I generally comment only on the tragic - but they never change anything in their profiles, so okay..
Photos help. They should be shot with the intent of creating a decent photo. Good light, outside, some neutral background, clothing that fits, a few different looks, inclusive situations, local places, captions for all, short into stories, use the editor, get someone who knows cameras or get LOTs of photos.
About me isn't rocking with "I exercise mainly by climbing. I go the front at least 2-3 times a week to climb and lift weights. I also like to run. Trail running preferably. I can't wait to do some real world climbing at some point"
Strengths are just as strong through anecdotes, stories about them, short bits that show how it works. The schedule of climb and lift weights.. aggh.
The profile needs something to lure women in, Be clear. Try to showcase what's going on while leaving a trail of breadcrumbs that those who are compatible will follow.
The work stuff is marginal. Maybe not spice it, but shorter - retirement plans/?
I never thought I'd be in a position to try lecturing on contact notes but I can inform what doesn't work: Weird, long, questions, persueing people that stopped answering, longer, weirder, cranky, asking for things, mean-ness (news gets around). What seems to work is a specific short and key observation, even if its wrong. One line, or only a sentence - but addressed to that person clearly and particularly - If there are local things happening it can work to reference them or discuss hitting those events.
There's not a lot bad with your profile, at least that any two people would agree on - so that makes it mostly good. Searching for the right people can be part of it. Do the chemistry test, and the needs. Look for specific people, save their names and send a note when you've something to say. Only look for first contact- that one tendril of two or three notes exchanged. That's what POF sells- but that it does well. | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 10/23/2012 5:20:35 AM | | Hi Cheeky. First off, I think you probably scare them with your profession, to be honest. Leaving it that you are in government would be fine. The rest? Tell them on your date, when they ask. In your pics, too many of guys, only one of you. That's my only suggestions. Leave the in's about your job out, and more pics with just you in them. Other than that, you have a great profile, lead an interesting life, any man should be glad to have you on his arm. Hope this helps. Good luck. | |
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| 200ish emails...no dates
Posted: 10/23/2012 6:10:41 AM | Anything happen? I like the next to the last photo the best as a main one. I think I'd take out the whole first paragraph about your job. Other than that it looks good.
Firefly | |
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