| | What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ? Page 1 of 2 (1, 2) | | I will be honest I find very boring & non romantic , it should never have to do with cost each one assume cost but why not go for breakfast , lunch on a terrasse , or dinner ... see alot of people go and meet people just too quickly without getting to know the person in here first so of course there would lots of so called bad dates ,no? If people took the time alittle to know the other you would not be wasting your time running every where meeting people you know absolutly nothing about , and if you took the time to know them a little then may be you would not even go and meet them in the first place . Comments??? | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 7/26/2012 5:37:24 PM | | I tend to agree. I've decided to insist on going Dutch for the first meet (hope I don't offend any Danes). I've also thought about making an agreement that we don't decide about a second meet at the first meet. You're really on the spot & I need some time to emotionally digest things. I tend to feel bad and agree to meet again when I'm not really feeling it. We can agree to contact via POF if either one decides to continue on. | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 7/26/2012 5:45:05 PM | | I would think though if one cannot say it right there if they want to meet again than that should say it right there , usually 2 people who click together they do want to meet again , but may be people are different . | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 7/26/2012 7:19:33 PM | just my opinion ok.
but guys don't like the breakfast of lunch or dinner thing as a first date, because it cost money even if its just their own meal there paying for........ going to met a gal(S) in one week gets expensive is what the guy will tell you... | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 7/26/2012 7:30:37 PM | | LOL, well it's a gonner than LOL but usually though if there is mature mutual interest and the guy is a guy of values he will want to meet and eat out , hey why wouldn t he , if he eats out anyways ,no ? if he doesn t want to meet you this way then he is not that into you so not worth it ,no? I am saying here that he would even pay just for his own meal . | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 7/26/2012 8:30:34 PM | | lol if he is meeting you for lunch on monday and another for breakfast of weds, and yet another on friday for supper..........see my point.....guys just won't spend even that amount of money on themselves to eat out...... | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 7/27/2012 5:31:34 AM | Well my pointy was fisrt of all I would have nothing to do with that kind of non serious guy , i am talking here about a real romantic prospect where both have taken the time in here to get to know each other and find they are very compatible and are somewhat attracted to each other and now they are ready to meet for the first time ,so no a coffee is just too stiff for this kind of rendez vous ... as for me the kind of guy you mention is not the kind i am searchung for not the kind i am talking about....
and I am not that kind either I am not into serial dating dont believe in it whatsoever ! | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/4/2012 6:47:11 AM | I seem to be late to this discussion, but I'd like to offer a male perspective.
MY ANSWER: I've done coffee dates and they are a profound waste of time. The problem is that if you don't know someone well, then simple chit chat seems to go nowhere. And yes, coffee dates are boring. Certainly coffee dates seem to lack any sort of fun or excitement or sexuality. It's just sitting and talking. Contrast with going to a town fair for a first date where you get your blood flowing and physical contact just by the ride throwing you around and you can still talk between rides. You can talk about the rides! I guess my point is this: a first date needs to establish mutual attraction and must be enjoyable. The goal is to get to know someone and to get a second date. Coffee dates never accomplish that.
If at the end of the first date you are unsure about seeing them again and feel no sexual attraction to them, the date was a failure. Coffee dates are always such a failure. It's the fault of the date planner, the guy, for that failure.
Also, I hate messaging online a bit first for the exact same reason. Sending emails establishes no sexual attraction or body language or anything. It's just sending an email and waiting for a response. Too often it ends with never meeting. The strategy of emailing and maybe a coffee date guarantees that you will never get to know the person and will never have a relationship with them. Sorry, not interested.
IN RESPONSE TO CONVERSATION (sorry this is already tl;dr): I am not a serial dater. I want a relationship. I'm lucky to get one date a month. There are decent guys out there. I think of every date as a serious romantic prospect, as they should leave the date with some feelings for me and wanting to see me again. And I am willing to pay a lot of money to accomplish that (so cost of a meal and/or activity). As I said, email and coffee fails to accomplish that. I don't ask out women I don't want a relationship with.
To be honest, I get the feeling that most women on here aren't serious about dating or relationships and lots of women on here don't trust any men on here. There are genuine men on this site. But we want to date women, not just message and buy drinks (coffee) for girls. | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/5/2012 12:20:45 PM | | hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm. and I disagree, coffee dates are far from boring, I've been known to meet for coffee and sit and talk for 3 hrs. thats not boring its fun interesting and one of the best ways to learn about each other .......yup I'm one of those cautious people that wouldn't stray to far away from my home base on a first date......... | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/10/2012 9:25:14 AM | | Also totally disagree. I met this girl last month, we had a coffee and talked for hours until they closed the place and kicked us out. I asked her out to dinner and she said yes and we had a great time. Still seeing her. Coffee works wonderfully if it's the right person. | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/19/2012 4:48:57 AM |
Coffee works wonderfully if it's the right person.
Bingo.
It being boring, is likely due to the person you're with than the coffee itself. Personally, I prefer things that are a little different--I.E going for a rollerblade, or long walk and having a pure conversation.
I find for a long walk, you'll get the person at their rawest form, as they'll typically dress down, and wear no makeup and show you the true them straight off the bat. Shows you their confidence level from the get-go.
Kind of what I'm after, anyways. | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/23/2012 6:49:14 AM | | Honestly, breakfast expensive, first time I hear this, and believe me just going for a coffee is ackward, I prefer going out to a restaurant and enjoy each others company over a great meal, and if it doesn`t work out well at least we had a great time. No matter if it works or not at least there was human interaction. | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/23/2012 1:06:42 PM | I think it's fine if you both feel like it. It's simple, not time and energy consuming. And you don't have to drink coffee either! lol
If you've already been talking to the person online, on the phone, etc, you already know that person a bit, it's not like starting from nothing.
But I personally prefer a walk, it seems to encourage conversation and going into things much more deeply. | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 8/24/2012 3:44:53 PM | | One can start off over coffee/tea/softdrink/what ever type/then continue by a walk. but you see a resturant/cafe your surrounded by the public so its a safe starting point........ | |
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| What do you all think of Coffee for a first date ?
Posted: 10/3/2012 9:00:44 AM | | I totally agree with Biker ... what is the big deal about going for breakfast or brunch or whatever ....i find it more civilised than checking out the chemistry ..theory .... i know i am blunt and direct well life brought me there ..i had to wake up and realise not every one is rightly motivated ...learned it the hard way ,so now i dont waste time on useless dead end streets so to speak ! | |
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