| | Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?Page 1 of 2 (1, 2) | A news report and a few links got me thinking. They perceived Vancouver men as pussies and Vancouver women to be reserved and unapproachable. Yes, I have done some travelling in my life but it's hard for me personally to tell. Once you spend much of your life in a place, you think it's gonna be the same everywhere else. Now with all these stories, I'm all like "What????? So women are easier in Spain or wherever? The reason why I can't get a girlfriend is because I live in a bad city for it? Is it worth it to travel in pursuit of love?" I am indeed nervous about initiating, but I think if women would smile, make eye contact and maybe even say "hi" more and more often, it would be easier to treat one to the gift of chivalry that she dreamed of when she first watched Cinderella as a little girl.
There are more links based on this subject than what I've listed:
http://www.vanmag.com/News_and_Features/Do_Vancouver_Women_Suck_A_Readers_Response
http://www.vanmag.com/News_and_Features/Do_Vancouver_Men_Suck
(haven't finished reading this yet)
http://www.spain-holiday.com/blog/spanish-women-are-the-worlds-flirtiest.php | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 7/29/2012 9:37:52 AM | Hey, I read both articles and I think the comments after the articles will give you a bit of insight, probably better than you will find here.
I will say this, the only reason I read this is because my daughter, who was born and raised in Colorado, has said much of the same things. Here in Colorado she always has a date but in Vancouver she has told me that men her age (27) are so unambitious and well, not all courteous. She is warm and approachable and would love to date a man that doesn't comes off as a slacker. And here I thought she was exaggerating, maybe not.
As to your question as where to move or not, well after reading these two articles I would certainly give it some serious thought if you are becoming too nervous to date, BTW how are your manners?
A Mom | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 7/29/2012 6:46:32 PM | Personally, I can only comment on my short stint in Vancouver, and that was back in 2004 (before I moved to the US).
The whole "man up and make the first move", I think counts for any city. Most women like the man to make the move. Once again, just based on my experiences. You know, the whole take charge and the like. But I used to hear a lot of complaints from women up there, about the mama's boy syndrome. Then again, my independence used to scare women off also :o(
But is dating in Vancouver that bad now? I never used to have problem meeting girls there. The only reason why I never let it go any further (than just dating), is that I never planned to stay there very long and felt it would be unfair of me to string someone along. I always told whomever I met that I wasn't planning in staying in Vancouver for too long, because of the job situation there. Most girls seemed fine about it.
Try and take this approach (your choice of course). If you see a girl you like, go over and say hello. Make sure you have something to talk about. If she gives you the cold shoulder, who cares, you're never going to see her again. If she responds, that can only be a good thing right? You can but try my friend and hope it works.
I need to read those articles now.
PS, I used to get many phone numbers when on the sky train. Oh, those were the days. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 7/31/2012 11:12:26 AM |
As to your question as where to move or not
I was actually contemplating travel, not permanently moving. Of course, the problem with spending a month in a country with flirty women is where the woman I find and I would set up our home base, in my hometown or hers.
how are your manners?
My grandma's voice haunts me. She was the only one in my family who instilled habits in me like manners at the dinner table and to say "Yes, please" and "No, thank you". She tried to teach me chivalry too. I'm not all against that but sometimes become a bit rebellious over that. I pay for a entire dinner date if it were my treat but I only tend to hold doors for elderly, physically disabled and people who have there hands full of objects. I've been a gentleman and given hot women the right of way, but that's only one step towards them. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/2/2012 10:35:08 AM | Interesting, because I recently came across a similar article, discussing singles & dating in Vancouver, & also comparing it with other cultures. There`s pages of insightful comments posted after. Here`s the link. It`s worth a read!
www.straight.com/article-200825/terminally-single-heres-whats-wrong-you | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/2/2012 7:37:19 PM | Many of us kind of discussed this in a previous thread not long ago. There are some good links to possible reasons throughout the post especially on 4th page.
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts7000999.aspx
I just got back to Florida after being in BC for 6 months and it's a pleasant surprize to see much friendlier people while out and about. Meeting polite and friendly people seemed to be everywhere while just plain ole shopping here and I have only been back 4 days. Nice conversations at the airport, friendly help, conversation in public and more politeness than I saw in BC in 6 months...
Don't get me wrong, I really did try when I was in BC and being from the south even more so than the average person. It was rarely returned whether I was holding a door open for someone or just saying hello.
At what point does selfishness, snobbery and such make you realize your going to be spending a lot of time either alone or only with other shallow people. Life is so much more fun when you have true caring and friendly people around you... | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/3/2012 4:48:04 PM | I think it's just the lack of culture and history. I not only find Vancouverites hard to approach but also very, very plain. Not a whole lot of Vancouverite / Canadian (And even American) women are very interesting. I was on a date with a lovely redhead a few months ago who just could not carry a conversation. And this is very typical of my dates with Canadian-borns. (I am excluding Quebecoises, who are very warm)
Almost all of my girlfriends have all been Europeans, from Europe. (I myself am Chinese, raised in HongKong) Having a long culture and history means the understanding of the intricacies of human relations, thus encouraging more open-mindedness and flirtatious behavior.
Canadian women are also sexually repressed here; Women are almost afraid of expressing themselves sexually. My last girlfriend, a Hungarian girl, was very communicative in the bedroom, where as my last Canadian girlfriend was not. It's almost as if women here are afraid of sex or being labeled as a slut.
Also - Women here care too much about things that don't matter and too little about things that do.
I was in Venice on a Sunday some time ago and waltzed into a coffee shop. I saw a beautiful Italian woman in her mid twenties and spoke with her. We spent the day on a yacht touring the city and the evening dining by the canals. It was lovely. I couldn't even fathom doing that in Vancouver (Not in the least to the part that we haven't any canals)
The best place to meet beautiful women is New York City. On any given day, there are 250K more women in Manhattan than men. It's heaven. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/4/2012 8:35:00 PM | Try living in Parksville/qualicum beach where the recent surverys say 65% of our population is seniors!!! Help, no wonder I can't meet anybody. THough have to say, I am new to POF and a bit leery of it, though giving it my best most positive shot bcuz this seems to be how the world has evolved. EWWW but I must and do accept it. Sorry for the rant. I was wishing I lived in the big city today so I could meet someone who isn't bald, drooling or suffering memory loss. No insult to residents, just sayin....I'm not ready, AT ALL to be a senior.
What you say though, I do believe to be true. But from the female standpoint, if we smile and make eye contact, alot of guys just laugh. As if I was some sleezebag. I don't know.
Would I travel for love. Not likely, I have and ended up having an amazing life but not with that guy that I travelled around the globe for. If I had met someone online had alot of messaging, then phone calls and hopefully skype, a couple of or at least one meet in person where ever. Then, instead of moving forward, go home and feel your feelings. I think you will know by then, but crap, that's all you hear about is online dating and how bad it can be (ie serial killers, serious, and bad people). It's hard to know and I hope my intuition doesn't fail me now and I wish you the best of success in meeting that special person. She is out there. You wouldn't be any better off in spain, except that you are a canadian and that can carry you only so far. The thing is people are the same whereever you go, spain, uk, australia,
hope this isn't seeming like a rant, it's meant to be a reminder that the grass is always, always greener on the other side and hope springs eternal. Keep the hope and look at your world around you with fresh eyes.
Love to all, and I hope true love comes to all
P | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/8/2012 10:29:23 AM | I'm very slow to stereotype or generalize, but - people (men and women) don't dress well, or dress up, here in Vancouver as much as in Eastern big cities I've lived in. Scraggly shorts, T-shirts, sweat-shirts, jeans and the "Surrey Tuxedo" are shockingly common. In other major cites I've lived in and visited, those looks are enough to get people to Move Away From You On The Group "W" Bench.
ED BEAR | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/8/2012 11:16:02 PM | I gotta say that you are right!... Although, I don't think that BC people are bad, I can rescue a lot of people that I know as nice persons and approachable. But it took me around 1 whole year to make friends (just friends) and to get into a relationship, it is almost impossible. And is even worse when you are not a Canadian, or you are a foreigner. I'm making a note that this is NOT RACIST act, it is just that maybe a lot of foreigners are looking for a Canadian partner to get sponsor, which is not my case.
I don't know if my specific case has something to do with this. But yeah, women here are unapproachable... even if you smile at them, they will never smile back. And as a funny fact, all my female friends, are not from BC, and most of them are not even from Canada.
Back in my home country, approach to a girl isn't the hardest thing, if you smile, they'll smile back!... maybe just as a nice gesture. Here, you smile a girl on the Skytrain she'll call the cops or move to another seat/train.
I'm agree with one of the articles down there, "the dating game is a dance of two" and if women want to be approached, you need to take the risk to meet someone that may be a douche-bag, but if you don't run the risk, then you don't want to play this game at all. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/12/2012 5:37:55 PM | | If you think Vancouver sucks for dating you have not tried Kamloops, Williams Lake, Ft. McMurray etc etc.. IME the Vancouver area is probably a better bet for dating than a good many places in Canada. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/30/2012 4:10:45 PM | | I am fortunate that I am able to travel in my sport and have visited cities across Canada, the US and Europe. Without question, the women here are more 'snobby' and I used that term in the most non offending manner. Case in point: Some women will have written on their profile something like this: '...if you expect a response, put some time into your message...' Okay fine, how many guys have spent the time to write a nice intro after reading that, looked at the 'viewed me' list and seen that she has looked at your profile but didn't respond. One, she just looks at who messages her and looks at the profile pic before reading the message and chooses not to respond. Two, read the message, looked at your profile, and still chose not to respond. Really sucks doesn't it? Women demand alot but are not willing to even do something so simple and considerate as a message that simply says - thank you but no thanks - or at the very least, write a generic one that they can cut and paste. Now before all the women start hating on me, I'm sure that men are guilty of it too. But it never ceases to amaze me how friendly the people I have met are when I'm not in Vancouver. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/31/2012 8:57:45 AM | Women demand alot but are not willing to even do something so simple and considerate as a message that simply says - thank you but no thanks
. Some women will be very picky and demanding just because they have been lead to believe that they have something most men want and it seems ingrained in our culture that men should jump through hoops to woo a woman. I can't blame them for not sending no thank you messages as so often they are not recieved well.
You may get a better response rate if you posted better pictures | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/31/2012 11:32:52 AM |
You may get a better response rate if you posted better pictures
You must work with POF for that statement.
So essentially there's no point in even having a profile as you're getting judged on your photo alone. Rubbish - That kind of remark only fuels that that sort of behavior is acceptable.
Maybe you put women on pedestals but I demand that they be cordial at the very least. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/31/2012 11:39:01 AM | I suppose you do not place any emphasis on what a woman looks like and freely message women with bad pictures or no pictures at all as long as they have a well written profile. I see that your profile states that someone must have a picture to contact you.... what does that say?
You may also find that demanding things from women is not going to get you very far in North America maybe someplace where women accept a more subservient role would suit you better.
I don't put women on a pedastal unless I feel they have earned it but I also don't think they owe me anything. If they don't respond well or don't respond at all to my approach then I just see that a a lack of interest. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 8/31/2012 11:45:03 AM |
I suppose you do not place any emphasis on what a woman looks like and freely message women with bad pictures or no pictures at all.
You may also find that demanding things from women is not going to get you very far.
Question for you - And I don't want to actually know your answer as this conversation isn't worth my time...If you were walking down the street and an 'unattractive' woman walked by and said hi - would you ignore her?
Also, as far as what I 'demand' you may not want to be so literal in your understanding of the definition. I also demand they have a pulse. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 9/1/2012 4:29:25 PM | I've heard that said about Vancouver and Victoria as well. Try living here in the capital! They are right when they call it the place for the Newly Wed and Nearly Dead...there is nothing in between.
Might be time for me to move.
What I don't get is that there are a lot of people from elsewhere who live here. It's quite rare to meet a local Victorian. Do the men who move here from elsewhere completely forget how to be men just because they live in Victoria? I know that women are quite snobby here but the men are as well. I'm not sure what it is really.... a culture of self-important, self-absorbed, self-entitled is alive and well here for sure. Sadly so... | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 9/10/2012 12:01:14 PM | it's because Vancouver is full of superficial, materialistic people who think they're better than everyone else. Simply put, everyone is trying to keep up with the joneses. Looking for a lifestyle that projects a certain image, status and the more fashionable it is, the better
Though with that being said, I've dated lots of nice gals over the years, it's really a numbers game. For every female there are five males. Which is why women are extremely picky and have huge shopping lists of requirements just to date them, and why men are so hesitant to approach them. Because most men get tired of constant rejection and end up giving up, and women cry about not being approached.
Rule #6: Men's ego's grow by the amount of numbers they get in a day
Women's ego grows by the number of guys she rejects in a day | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 9/13/2012 5:53:06 PM | t's because Vancouver is full of superficial, materialistic people who think they're better than everyone else. Simply put, everyone is trying to keep up with the joneses. Looking for a lifestyle that projects a certain image, status and the more fashionable it is, the better
agreed with this.
I find guys from Van are snooty and pickier than sh1t. Unapproachable type people.Uptight,stuck up, act and look more and more like a woman.It's aweful..total he shes.
What happened to a man looking like a man and acting like one.
I just don't like Van guys at all...obviously lol | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 9/13/2012 11:25:26 PM | everybody in vancouver wants attention.
But this creates a negative feedback loop where nobody gives any attention to anyone because they are so focused on getting their own, so no one gets attention, and thus they spend more time on themselves to get attention! I think secretly every guy here at least is deprived, no one wants to give attention to the hot girls because they appear to be full of themselves and have no time for anyone else
More and more guys are just ending up gay, and I fear its because of this evil cycle. Girls can be affected the same way unfortunately, although its more like a rich girl poor girl system. Where there are those knockout gorgeous girls who know they have it all and get all the guys going after them, but they are just in it for the ego boost. The kinds of girls you want are the ones on the sidelines, patiently waiting and hoping somebody will notice them and not the chick with the perfect boobs and ass. | |
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| Vancouver sucks for dating? What are your thoughts?
Posted: 9/14/2012 10:29:34 AM |
Two, read the message, looked at your profile, and still chose not to respond. Really sucks doesn't it? Women demand alot but are not willing to even do something so simple and considerate as a message that simply says - thank you but no thanks - or at the very least, write a generic one that they can cut and paste.
That's because many men get upset when they are turned down and get out right nasty. Can you really blame them? If men had some balls and dealt with rejection in adult manner maybe women would respond with thanks for no thanks.
The real problem is feminism, if this goes to other countries same thing will eventually happen. These kind of women want to put little or no effort to get things. My advice date women from other countries or old fashioned values, not the so called to be old fashioned out of convenience. | |
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