| | Toning it down?Page 1 of 1 | | I am very sarcastic and love joking around. Sometimes this makes me come off as either weird or a slut. I don't joke about sexual things... first. I just like having light hearted conversations. I just try to make the person comfortable and use humor. So my question is do men find outgoing humorous women to be weird and scary? | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 12:28:07 PM | | I like a girl with a good sense of humor. I can understand your plight though cause I tend to have a dry sarcastic sense of humor around people and I think they take me seriously. Its funny sometimes cause people get so offended sometimes. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 12:35:07 PM | | You want someone who is going to like you for the real you. So who are you doing a favor for by toning down your sense of humor? You'll make yourself miserable by stunting your personality. And you'll be in essence lying to the guy by being someone other than yourself. Just be you, and hold out for the guy that accepts and embraces it. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 1:05:08 PM |
So my question is do men find outgoing humorous women to be weird and scary?
Some do, some don't.
Just like how some men find introverted stone faced women to be weird and scary, and some men don't.
There aren't going to be many female qualities that are going to be universally loved or universally loathed by dudes, unfortunately.
If you are naturally outgoing and humorous, why worry about the guys that are weirded out by it? | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 1:08:19 PM |
So my question is do men find outgoing humorous women to be weird and scary?
yes, men hate humor and all think alike. you'll never find love. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 1:10:07 PM | My sense of humor is extremely offensive at times not to mention the fact that I have zero problem making jokes about other peoples' personal lives or difficulties. You know how everyone will be hushed when a certain someone comes in the room because that someone's marriage is going downhill only to have some idiot at the party make a loud joke about it? I'm that idiot.
My advice? Draw a few lines for yourself about the sort of things you say and don't say, at least until you get a feel for whomever you're talking to.
A wacky sense of humor and a talent for wisecracking is an asset but only when used at the right time.
edit: also like others have said you won't win over everyone no matter how hard you try so no matter what you do don't get discouraged if somehow, somewhere, someone just doesn't like you... | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 1:16:23 PM | | There's a difference between being humorous and being sarcastic, some men might take sarcasm as offensive. I also have a sarcastic sense of humor but I only use it on friends that know me, when I'm with strangers or people I meet at work I'm usually low key. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 1:29:40 PM | | i personly like outgoing people butr i can see how people can be scared of this. i say just be you if the person youre with seems frightened then asses the situation. you cant controll people or how thaty react to you . if you spend time thinking how people think about you then you cant work on how you are uneque. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 1:54:12 PM | | Sarcasm is a little over-used. After a while, everyone sounds like know-it-all complainers if they give you a steady diet of sarcasm. It's also an excellent disguise for passive-aggressive behavior. Overall, it's over-done. So much sarcasm on TV shows, etc. If it's your "go-to" kind of humor, consider expanding the repertoire. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 2:03:26 PM | There's a fine line between sounding like a witty, funny person and just a sarcastic, caustic bwitch.
Being bombarded with sarcasm and jokes can be tiresome. People might wonder if there's a real person inside the Joan Rivers impersonator, or if you just have nothing of substance to say. | |
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DjKGB
| | Joined: 7/21/2012
Msg: 11 | |
| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 2:12:27 PM | So my question is do men find outgoing humorous women to be weird and scary?
no. i think everyone is just different and its great to meet new people if we were all the same then that would just be boring. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 2:22:44 PM | | I find no problems about weird personalities, but if you add loud and rude to the equation it's game over. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 2:47:15 PM | | OP, funny is great just as long you are not the only person that thinks you are funny! | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 3:33:11 PM | I'm thinking back to my twenties, and though I hung around with and experienced a lot of varied and different peoples, I don't recall ever even hearing of an instance where a woman was found to be "scary" due to her outgoing personality and/or sense of humor.
I recall many situations wherein she (or he) was considered to be egotistical and overbearing, because she (or he) thought that they were cheerfully trying to steer people into having a good time, while completely ignoring or failing to appreciate their sensibilities.
I've known lots of gregarious people, and many who put in an effort to be "the life of the party." The ones who were bad at it, often faced a lot of uncomfortable people who would turn away from them stone-faced, and even avoid them. That might appear to the people who thought they were "lightening the mood" with their humor, as though people were afraid of them, or thought they were weird.
If you are having problems related to this, I would suggest, as a way of toning it down, to increase the amount of time and effort you put into feeling out everyone else's emotional state. Perhaps try something as simple maintaining your sense of humor entirely as it is, just at a lower volume level, so that you don't overwhelm others with the power of your voice. Sometimes a joke told at normal conversational level, comes across as a crass insult if it is spoken very loudly, or even shouted. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 3:43:39 PM | Being humorous and outgoing are positive traits.
Guys your age may not be able to keep up with your mental witticisms,
or maybe they are slightly intimidated by your good looks.
If either....they are not for you.
So don't sweat that.
However..... if you do like a guy....
Learn to flirt more and joke less.
Tis how us guys do it when we are trying to pull in a girl's interest.
good luck. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 4:37:57 PM |
I am very sarcastic and love joking around. Sometimes this makes me come off as either weird or a slut. I don't joke about sexual things... first. I just like having light hearted conversations. I just try to make the person comfortable and use humor. So my question is do men find outgoing humorous women to be weird and scary?
I enjoy... to some extent... a woman who is more outgoing than I am, certainly where opening a conversation is concerned. I don't like flirtatious women, though... and I don't appreciate sarcasm; if it's so regular a person would describe herself as "very sarcastic," I'm probably going to feel pretty insulted around her and want to throw her through a plate-glass window. That's just me, though. I'm sure other guys enjoy it and keep right up with you... but I prefer sincere, honest, open conversations about meaningful things. If I want jokes, I'll go to a comedy club. I don't find "outgoing, humorous women to be weird and scary"... but I do find them incredibly irritating. If the overwhelming majority of what a woman says is "very sarcastic" and "joking around"... I'd want to get away from her as quickly as possible. I don't see where the "slut" part comes in, with regard to sarcasm or jokes... but if you're constantly, though "not at first," throwing risque or suggestive comments around after you think you've gotten to know someone well enough (?), I'd again get very irritated.
I don't think there's anything wrong with you, so please don't get that idea. It's just that I prefer someone... "more serious." I'm sure there are a gazillion guys who would love to joke around with you and could/would give you a run for your money in the sarcasm department. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 4:46:03 PM | | Humor's good. The problem with sarcasm is, it's usually deriding something or someone, and that can go south. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 7:04:12 PM | I would rather have a conversation with someone at least trying to give you a chance, then someone who just wants to find something wrong with you. So, being light hearted is a great way to just have fun and relax when getting to know someone over the phone or for that matter on a date or in a relationship.
After all life is not as serious as alot of people take it. You eventually die. Have fun and relax and enjoy it while you are still here. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 7:08:56 PM | | I completely understand I just dislike awkward silences so I usually fill in the gap with a one liner. I usually am very sweet when it comes to it though, not obnoxious or rude. I just have been told by friends that I am way too out there for dates but I think I handle them well. There's a time and a place for it but sometimes I wonder if I wasn't so quick with the jokes would men actually take me seriously. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 8:06:41 PM |
I just dislike awkward silences so I usually fill in the gap with a one liner.
yet others like the idea of letting everyone get involved with conversation rather than having you as the social event mascot. You seem to control the environment - many people don't like being controlled. Not to mention it's also a rather arrogant position for you to take - it's unappealling except to those guys who live vicariously through your behaviour. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 9:49:52 PM | I see where your coming from. I think you know what they can do if they can't take a joke right?
Be yourself, the right people will love a quirky sense of humor. I've busted out the redneck jokes in the limo on the way to the cemetery, so screw it. It's what you think that counts. | |
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| Toning it down?
Posted: 7/31/2012 9:50:41 PM | | I agree with that long haired guy on a crutch. I think he has the right idea which applies to me also. lol | |
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