| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:05:03 PM | How can I put this delicately? Well I guess I really can’t. It’s obvious you don’t want to tell me exactly why we broke up..you left something out. I am not sure what it was but I wish you would have been a little more honest. Was dating me so brutal that you had to hurt me and say (your words) “I don’t want to date you again” that was rude. I don’t know why you are being such an ***hole excuse my language but I thought you were different. I was not just a friend I was your girlfriend... I was the one that was by your side..telling/showing you that I cared, loved you. I wish that I never introduced you to my parents because you “knew” why I introduced you. I thought we had a future and would have adjusted to it…no matter what. You should have not told me you loved me…”I love you” means something in my book…if not in yours. Words are not just words…they mean something. Yes…I know I backed out of plans on you…that was not nice…but it happened. That was no reason to give up on us…the missing you part (while you were at training), backing out of plans and what my parents said or didn’t say. For Pete’s sake they only met you once..they don’t tell me who to bring home or not. None of these were good enough reasons to break up..very petty stuff. If you really loved me as you said you would’ve fought for my parents…sisters approval. Obviously, I was naïve to see what you were about. You knew how much it meant for you to meet my family…especially my parents.
I was going to make up for that weekend..thinking you were just upset and that we just had a little spat…but I didn’t know this is why we broke up. Read this:
When I met him, I liked him
When I liked him, I loved him
When I loved him, I lost him
Hmmm…interesting isn’t it. I’m being very blunt and brutally honest…****y but this has to be said. You had my heart and you broke it for reasons I don’t know about or which you won’t tell me. I truly did love you and meant it every time I said it which is often as you know. Maybe you fell in love or thought you were in love…doesn’t really matter right now. I think you gave up too easily on us or every girl you dated. Love is worth fighting for but I guess I wasn’t.
Good or bad...great...tell me what you think | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:09:13 PM | To write it for your own benefit ? Good thing.
To send it ? Probably not.
I sent one that pretty much just said ' Please never contact me again, unless there is a specific legal reason to."
That says enough.
Once they are gone, they are gone. | |
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JWA
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Joined: 5/21/2005
Msg: 3 | |
| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:21:30 PM | Not sure what you're really asking but I'll give an old guys opinion.......................
It shows you've been terrifically hurt by this person as it contains many pointed "accusations" about what you did and how he reacted not to your liking about the issues you raise. I can tell you're very disappointed in him and now have many regrets about trusting them and if had a chance to relive that time together you'd not allow it.
In all the best ways this is a female-originated letter and I think it's hoping or seeking some sort of closure or "last shot" at someone to either let them know how you have been hurt by their actions OR make them feel bad for hurting you. If they are as uncaring or callous as your writing suggests then this will be seen as humorous and as a "desparate" attempt wound them. I've written similar letters and the only time I ever sent one (I was 16 at the time) my "true love" took it to school and showed it around to everyone she knew---I never did send the others! Instead, write one pouring out your heart and every feeling you have and don't hold the emotions back---let 'em have both barrels!! Just DON'T actually send or deliver it----not for two or three days anyway. Re-read it when you're in a better state of mind and decided then if you want it read.
I'm really sorry you've been hurt----sounds like it meant a great deal to you----I honestly feel for you Princess! Better days are ahead----be prepared for them!
J W | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:23:39 PM | "To write it for your own benefit ? Good thing."
My view is the same... sometime things happen for a good reason even though at the time, it doesn't seems like it...
although you may want the "real reason" behind the break up, sometime its better to leave it as it... if he tell you the true and absolute reason, would it make things better?? | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:24:53 PM | 9 times out of ten they will share it with there friends and even your friends and try to make a A$$ out of ya.. trust me on this one.. every one will see it..
sucks... but its the truth..
the only way i would do something like that now is if i let her read it in front of me and not take it with her.. It will still get around though i belive.. the sad truth.. sorry you got hurt ... | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:28:01 PM | As I have said previously, having any feelings for someone that is out of your life just delays the healing process. They are still exerting a control over you, because you let them.
In my mind, they are dead to me.
That may sound really cruel and heartless, but it is based on experience.
If I left someone on good terms, I could be a friend of theirs forever. | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:37:00 PM | cuteathleticman
I'm not a mean person...I don't do this stuff but we talked about marriage..future etc...I met almost his entire family. I shouldn't feel bad...because I've held off my feelings a long time. | |
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jimi77
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Joined: 7/13/2004
Msg: 11 | |
| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 6:43:56 PM | hon.. your emotions are talking here... i understand your pain and wanting closure.. I feel bad for ya.. but i hold nothing against someone that speaks in pain and out of love..
my advice is move on and let your self heal your only going to get hurt more by this and open back up the wounds.. I know it sucks to hear that.. I have had the same deep scare accross my heart.. i say this not to be mean but out of carring.. Good luck to you | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/8/2005 7:14:59 PM | the guy wont' care ...he'll probably show this to his buddies and make fun of you...reverse roles, you'd probably do the same thing, I would...once it's over it's over...no phone calls, letters or emails are going to change the persons mind
sorry sweetie, you'll be fine though and karma will let you have your turn someday | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/9/2005 1:38:05 AM | Wow Princess....you've been broken up for 2 months and you're still this hurt. I feel for you, I feel your pain...been there, done that....but even after kicking my ex-husband out of the house for cheating (married 8 years)...well hon, it didn't take me 2 months to start dating again. Yes, I was still hurt..but ask yourself this question "am I hurt more because I love him or because he betrayed me and my trust in him"? If it's the latter then you're getting ready to get him out of your head and move on....let the letter be the end of it...close this chapter in your life. It obviously wasn't meant to be...better to be hurt now than way down the road cuz now you can start over.
Montreal guy made a good point...if a relationship ends with no explanation, then it's like they are dead to you.
good luck | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/13/2005 1:26:40 PM | I agree with Montreal....if has some cathartic benefit...do it...
but sending it....what kind of reply are you looking for....i can imagine what you will get....
Something along the lines like " get over it "
it sucks....we all go through it....but letting go is the best thing but hardest thing to do | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/13/2005 2:05:19 PM | | I am certainly feeling your pain right now. In fact I am still working on mending my own broken heart, as I was basically suddenly "dumped" by a person I loved and lived together with for 5 years, and your letter sounds like one I could have written. I know you just want him to understand your hurt and "feel" something about what he meant to you...and you want to hear that you meant something to him too...But the best thing to do is let it go. Someone else here said it just right...no amount of letters, calls, or emails will make any difference. Don't get me wrong....I have not been "miss calm" throughout my ordeal, but give yourself time and it will gradually get better. If you have already sent that letter, do not expect anything...he might not even finish reading it, and even if he does, then what? Nothing...he will not suddenly see the "errors of his ways" and change his mind about the break-up, and it's not likely that he will say something to you that's gonna make you feel any better. So, just hang in there. I know it is unpleasant right now, but you will be just fine. Know that your heart was in the right place, and that if this guy had been "Mr. Right" he would still be there. | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/13/2005 3:53:52 PM | I'm responding before reading others posts~
Ok. We, women are much more emotional them men are. You writing this hopefully made you feel better... DON't send it... It's just lashing out to him.
Start writing a daily online journel about your feelings and about your relationship. Be honest with yourself. You will eventually feel better and be open to moving on.
Look Who KNOWS why men or women end relationships the way they do... and some people are just very immature. Sure he should have explained what was going through his head.. there obviously were some communication gaps.
MEN do NOT like to do something hard! They don't like to break up and hear us cry.. blah blah blah.. that's why we have to call our girlfriends! :-)
Best of luck to you! | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/13/2005 3:56:40 PM | Princess~ I had an ex-boyfriend break up with a gal and she sent me a 2 page E-mail thanking me for the demise of her relationship!
He's in Texas I'm in San Diego! Now that E-mail was to make her feel better. Plus she was in denial.
Do you feel better that you sent it? Was part of you hoping he would come back to you and say he didn't realize? | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?
Posted: 8/13/2005 4:04:01 PM | clevergiggles8
the guy wont' care ...he'll probably show this to his buddies and make fun of you...reverse roles, you'd probably do the same thing, I would...once it's over it's over...no phone calls, letters or emails are going to change the persons mind
sorry sweetie, you'll be fine though and karma will let you have your turn someday
your pretty cynical , is that how you deal with a lover of yours to show his letters to your girlfriends as the butt of a joke ? and you tgell her she will get her revenge someday on him or someother guy
get some help lady | |
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jimi77
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Joined: 7/13/2004
Msg: 22 | |
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| Letter sent to ex...What are your thoughts on this?@princessofcanadia
Posted: 8/14/2005 10:22:57 AM | I think if you have anything healing that might help him/her...then I would let them know that part but otherwise I would work on my own closure , unsent letters can sometimes be a good way to approach that.
Some things are best left unsaid. If it will add more injury to the mix, I wouldn't send anything. | |
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