| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 1:18:46 PM | I have this friend I have known for 16 years she has a profile here on POF, she met this guy she really liked from POF. I her profile she states she is just looking for sex and nothing more. I talk to this guy once in awhile and he seems nice. She has a man in her life she calls her husband and he is a great father to her illegitimate child. Two days after she met this guy she started talking about leaving him and if things work out and so on. The only problem in her relationship other than her is it is a sexless relationship. She was just looking for sex. It was the understanding between the her and the guy she met from here. She starts calling him 20 times a day and it drove him crazy she would be demanding and whiney. She tried to get me to drive her down to where he lives and stalk him. He finally had enough when she called 7 times in 20 minutes and he told her they were done. When I talked to her she said she felt like being a vengeful Bytch, and was going to call his work and tell them he did drugs so he would get in trouble. He has a high profile job. And then she was going to come here and leave something about him in feedback. I love my friend but she has gone off the deep end. Should I try and step in and calm the situation down? This guy dosn't deserve any trouble just 'cause she has a bruised ego.
Any Ideas? | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 1:34:06 PM | I had a pyscho bytch like that in my life a couple years ago.
I told her the blunt truth. If she wanted to contact me, do it through lawyers. If she wanted to see me, bring along the cops. Either way, any more attempts would prompt a restraining order.
Just tell her the long term implications of what she's doing are not worth the short-term aggrevation she's causing everyone (no matter how 'fun' it seems).
Don't even bother being around her as long as she's in her state of mind...it'll cause you problems you shouldn't have to worry about. A real friend wouldn't do what she's doing to you. It's not like she's been placed in that situation against her will...she's the one who wants to start/continue the crap. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 1:37:28 PM | | Im sure he dosent want to get police involved and I am a little wierded out that she is like this although the signs were there she did a good job of hiding it. There was an incedent involving another guys Jeep and I only got her version, but she ended up going on probation. And her story dosent seem to fit what she told me. So is it my place to tell this guy watch your back? | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 2:13:08 PM | eeeeeeeew!
i probably wouldn't tell him anything. he needs to learn a lesson about picking up women on the internet for sex.
personally, i'd grab the popcorn and enjoy the drama | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 2:26:05 PM | Your friends sounds like a real winner....come on now, she is married and having an affair? Get real! The fact that you know so much about the story and you, yourself have also talked to this man, leads me to believe you have alterior ideas?
IMO- Stay out of it.....pick better friends and find your own man | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 2:32:02 PM | She's a psycho. Sorry, your friend is the definition of the word. Why do you hang out with this lunatic ? This is a guarantee so pay attention ! : She'll do this to you someday if she hasn't already.
SICutie, if the sexes were reversed would you still have this opinion ? I'll give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you'd say yes. Either way, if two people want to only make the beast with two backs, that's their business. If that were the case, there's nothing wrong with it usually. In this case I think she's a lunatic and he's a selfish prick for trying to screw a "married" woman. Mind you, he's probably doing the unknowing guy a favour in this case if that guy ever finds out about this little escapade of his common-law wife's. It's messed up, no doubt. Still, the bottom line is that she is going to pull this crap with the wrong guy one of these days and he ain't gonna bother calling the cops. She'll meet one just like her. I doubt she'll come out on top in that case. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/25/2005 2:38:06 PM | | LOL SIcutie that was a good one! No I wouldn't tell her internet lover anything. He already knows that she has gone super psycho. But I think you need to put your friend into serious check! If she won't listen to then it's time to get the h*ll out of dodge for awhile. Where is her husband or live in lover during this? | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 12:02:32 AM | People do strange things when rejected,Woman scorned,yada,yada,yada.If you're a friend of his then maybee.If not don't worrie about it.It's not you're problem.I don't know what he could really do about it any way.Seems like from people I've talked to that that restraining order crap doesn't work.Maybee he could warn his job ahead of time what she planned but then they might start wondering if he really did do drugs and was just covering.The real crime is that you can get in trouble at work for being a drug user.  It's a dangerous world out there and people just have to take their lumps when dealing with sex(stalkers,babies,VD,ex's)And to the girl who said he should learn his lesson for haveing sex with a girl from the internet.Would it be different if he met her at a bar or church. I personally try to have sex with girls no matter where I meet them. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 7:06:30 AM | ok never mind picking better friends I mean we were 16 when we met and she wasnt like that.. just because a person is doing something worng dosnt mean you bail on them. I dont agree with her action AND NO I DONT HAVE AN ALTERIOR MOTIVE. Just because I have talked to the guy? Get real yourself. I know so much about the story because she tells me everything and he wrote and asked if he had to worry and told me what was going on.
He can look for sex all he wants it was a mutual agreement that it was a no strings attached sexual thing. it what they wanted. I am here for the forums. A person should not be judged by another persons actions.
Part of me wants to let it play out, but they care taker in me wants to say hey cut the crap or your gonna get yourself in trouble again.
Anyway Thanks for all the feedback everyone, im going to let it play out.. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 7:47:42 AM | totally agree with you gotapulse.
the reason i said anything about picking up women ont he internet for sex is because, reallynow, it's just creepy and not to mention dangerous. goes both ways | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 8:03:38 AM | I tried talking to her and told her she was being immature she made it clear that she wasnt looking for a relationship and if she wasnt happy at home she should end it with him and move on. Hurting this guy was foolish she knew from the beginning he was only out for one thing. Therefor she let it happen to herself she cant blame him he didnt lie to her or give her false hope he was going to wisk her away on his white horse to his castle and they were going to live happily ever after.
Looking for sex on the internet everyone has thier opinion of it and to each their own. I agree with everyone when they say She should end the first relationship before looking for a new one and state that she is looking for a new relationship and not just sex. I think confuses sex with love. He current bf isnt having sex with her therefor she thinks he dosnt love her. Not the case. She would rather put up with someone treating her like dirt and getting sex than having the real thing she has. I hope she does read this and I hope she learned something from her experience. It hasnt stopped her form giving out her number and meeting people from online and i feel sorry for the next guy. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 8:46:19 AM |
And her story dosent seem to fit what she told me. So is it my place to tell this guy watch your back?
As a guy who has gone through this in the past (different reasons), I have a sense of what it's like to have to deal with the situation.
I'd say give the guy a head's up. You can make one quick phone call as a warning.
The implications of not doing anything are far worse. Even though you don't know what she will do (if anything), isn't it just better not to have to worry about this in the long run? I mean, she's already had to deal with the cops in the past. A good friend would definately step in.
This is not an episode of the Cosby show. This is real life. We're adults, and as such, have to act this way. Saying this isn't your situation is just an easy cop-out. True, your friend is acting unlike herself: what would you rather have-a situation where she resents you for doing nothing/letting things happen, or have her be around in a couple months as a great friend because you helped her out?
As someone who has been there, please help out. If you do, and nothing happens, it's still the mature (and right) thing to do. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 1:38:45 PM | | Be a freind and show some integrity. I applaud you for even thinking this was wrong, now you MUST intervene as a good person that you ar. I mean at least for the dude who doesnt deserve this crap. AND for your FRIEND | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 8/26/2005 2:49:40 PM | she sounds like she needs the men in the white coats!!
OT: offering advice what every friend should do but be careful not to tread where your not invited. It's another matter when you take it upon yourself to alter effects of her love life or lack there off. | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 9/6/2005 12:54:05 PM | | Thanx for everyones advise. I did talk to her and told her I thought she went nutz! She mentions this guy everytime I talk to her and I tell her to just move on. I think she did. Just wondered how everyone else felt | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 9/6/2005 3:20:08 PM | Sounds like she could have used a really good friend to strongly advise her NOT to CHEAT in the 1st place  Karma is a BIOTCH!
She deserves the misery she feels and more.
Now,instead of calling his job she should just call Jerry! Jery! Jerry! Jerry Springer!
I can't feel sorry for the guy because he KNEW he was messing with a woman without character nor integrety from jump......they played with live wire,why be surprised at getting shocks? | |
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| she got burned should he pay if she was wrong?
Posted: 9/6/2005 7:31:35 PM | I think you are being too hard on the girl...pyschos need love too  . Well they both deserve something, she deserved getting burnt for meeting a guy over the net just for sex, and he deserves something for burning her like that but her profile said she only wanted sex so she got what she wanted...now leave the pyscho alone and let her go chop up some innocent virgins or something. | |
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