| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 10:52:55 AM | | My ex left me when I was pregnant and I just had my baby 6 weeks ago. Hardly any men seem to want to get involved with me now, atleast not seriously. I can't say I blame them but what the hell? Am I never going to be able to have a boyfriend because I have a baby? | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 10:55:07 AM | I think "most" men are afraid of women with children of almost any age... period!!!
Yes you will be able to have that special someone in your life.. one day.
Don't be in such a rush. Your baby is the most important person in your life right now. You don't need any man to determine your worth.
And don't ever ever feel guilty or let anyone make you feel guilty for having your baby. | |
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*Em*
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Joined: 6/29/2005
Msg: 3 | |
| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 12:17:59 PM | ive met a few guys that dont mind my older ones but are slightly more freaked out by my 15 month old, i think some guys think that if your single with a baby, you cant be fully over the childs father yet. they also think the father will play an active role and that may be a threat.
(thats only a FEW men..not all)
on the most part ive been lucky. i have 4 kids and have spoken to alot of great guys who really dont have a problem with them (if they did then no loss)
trust me..there are some fab guys out there that will love you for the person you are. a baby is a gift from god and you are so lucky! concentrate on your wonderful baby and give yourself time, "your" man will come along sooner or later  | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 12:30:50 PM | | I think it is because men can be selfish. They know that they are not going to get the attention they need or want. They are loosing out in most cases. I’ll take a good mother any day over someone who is single. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 2:34:46 PM | | There are many of us out there that aren't afraid of children of any age. I dare say it will be a bit more difficult to find someone under thirty that feels that way simply because most at that age are still enjoying the party life, and the freedom of no responsibilities. Give it time there's someone for everyone in the end. And whatever you do don't think you have to settle for anything less, just because you have a child. I think that seems to be the most common misconception those with children subject themselves to. I have 2 great kids and I wouldn't just settle for anything. I wish you the best of luck in your fishing. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 6:54:53 PM | Well said lyny!
As for the original question, there are more and more men out there that are not intimidated by the fact that you have children. Don't try and include anyone in your child's life too quickly, take the time to get to know them minus the kids. That can be hard because you have to split your time but in the end it lets the man know that you aren't looking for a substitute daddy, and be proud of being a single parent...that goes for the men too. It's a tough job but very rewarding and others will see that in you and respect you for it. As lyny said don't settle! (why have a minnow when you can have the minnow's daddy) | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 8:55:43 PM | Dont worry you will meet the one when you are ready.My daughter is 2 yrs now and I still have not met any decent guy as soon as they read I am a single mom they run. But I am confident that he is out there and in due time i will know who he is. Right now just enjoy your little angel and that is all you have to worry about. My daughters father has never been there when I told him I was pregnant he told me he was cheating on me for two weeks and then I moved when I was pregnant to a different town and province so it is really hard without anyone here but family but she keeps me going and that all that matters good luck  | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 9:34:58 PM | | Hi All..... Well, I am a man..... and in my experience from years ago, as a single father (my first wife died suddenly when our son was 2 1/2 Y O), I asked the same question about men with babies and if women are terrified of men in that situation. I raised that boy alone for 10 years before I found someone who would accept me.... and .... well.... here I am looking again. You women are not in this one alone and I empathize with you.... I know that there are good people out there from and for both genders and probably the internet may be the greatest thing to come along for finding that good person who is right for you. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/2/2005 9:37:38 PM | | I seem to have that same problem with Woman they don't like the whole daddy daycare thing either. My boy is going on 10 next month and i've had him since he was 6 months old and I was with 2 woman in this time frame, many of the other woman ran as soon as I told them I had kids.. So don't feel too bad my love as I tell myself time after time "someday" they'll find me..! | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 7:40:40 AM | | Well it gives me a little bit of sick satisfaction that men go through it too....except not many men stand up and take the kids, so bravo to you. As to everyone else, I know I shouldn't rush and I would never bring someone into my daughter's life I didn't think would stay around, I'm just saying this sucks. I'm tired of being lonely. Also I'm just plain tired. My family helps as much as they can but they have their own lives. Oh well, my daughter is completely worth it. I'm sure I'll meet that "someone" someday. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 8:38:46 AM | | I happen to know what you're going through. I'm 25 weeks along now and the father is nowhere to be found. I'm not sweating it because my main concern right now is the health and welfare of the little life growing inside me. I also feel for the single dads out there... I've dated a couple and been fine with it because I love kids. So if there are any single dads who wouldn't mind another one, let me know. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 8:44:43 AM | | Men aren't sure how to deal with the fact that someone that just had a baby is instantly looking soon after. Perhaps it is a fear that she's only looking for someone to help take care of the kid or that they don't know if the real father will come back one day and say "What the hell are you doing with my wife and child?" | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 1:59:19 PM | Perhaps it is because you are 21 and men that are around that age are busy having fun and not wanting to settle down with the responsibility going into a relationship with a built in family. It is a little overwhelming for them. Heck, at 21 they cant even remember to change their underwear everyday, LOL. But hang in there. You are a beautiful girl, and if you dont find someone sooner, by the time you hit your mid 20's men will be beating down your door for a date.
Ozzie | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 3:54:32 PM | | I have to say I thought this was going to be alot of girls talking about how men are pigs and such. I was wrong but i'm glad I was. I find no problem with dating a girl with a child. I almost married one. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 4:32:13 PM | Likewise here. I think it is very likely that the next person I marry will have children as well and we will have to blend the families. It is just a given when you hit your 30's, most other single 30's have a kid or two. But I dont mind.
Ozzie | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 4:43:48 PM | I would say most are. They dont get the attention that they need from us and we cant do anything at the drop of a hat.
They also have a problem with the whole father issue.. they dont like the fact we still have to talk and see them.
I dont understand it but i havnt had a real relationship since my sons father and it has always been because they cant handle my son. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 4:50:53 PM | | Hey guys ... nice that some others of you share the concept.... and my response to missq4ever is this.... the guy is nowhere to be found.... that really sucks.... i know what my life was like when my first wife was pregnant and it was great- the most erotic episode of my life... she said she was giving me the love of two people.... (after all these years, I still miss her terribly when I think about this)! The guy is missing one of the most wonderful times in a couple's life.... | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 4:50:56 PM | That for the same reason as Sugar High. You are 19, and at that age, the young men just are not willing to settle down yet (for the most part). But also, like Sugar High, you are quite attractive, and it is just a matter of time before things come full circle and men will be constantly asking you for dates. Not only because of your physical appearance, but also because by the time you get into your mid or high twenties, your children will be a little older. It is easier for a guy to date a woman with a 6 or 7 year old compared to one with a baby. Hang in there ladies. There is someone out there for you but it may take some patience to find him.
Ozzie | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/3/2005 4:53:46 PM | My ex left me when I was pregnant and I just had my baby 6 weeks ago. Hardly any men seem to want to get involved with me now, atleast not seriously. I can't say I blame them but what the hell? Am I never going to be able to have a boyfriend because I have a baby?
Ummm... it's only been 6 weeks! I'd figure you would have spent the first couple.. umm... you know recovering from the birth. Why not enjoy this time with the baby before trying to complicate it with the addition of a man (or in some cases another child heh). As well, you should be looking for a certain type of man (one who is good with kids) and this restricts the number of men available for dating. It's a whole new dating scene when you have a child. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/4/2005 7:46:56 AM | I think in some cases that woman/men just put there standards too high. What Im saying is that people were burned to bad the last time they were with someone, so in the back of there mind there saying to themselfs are "Ill never do that again... " But the funny thing is maybe the someone is right next to most of us and were to blind too see that someone because we all got our standards too HIGH.. Im not saying let your gaurd down but keep an open mind and watch the people around you see how they act around you..... Or if you have kids look for someone that has kids too so that would pervent that scaryness of someone running away!!!
 BUT KEEP AND OPEN MIND AND OPEN YOUR EYES | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/4/2005 10:00:59 AM | | hangingout69 look at it this way i was pregnant and alone for nine and 1/2 months and now its been a month since she was born. thats 10 and 1/2 months i've been on my own and lonely after being with someone for 5 years. plus i don't know how you interpretted my statement but trust me the last thing i am looking for is sex. i'm not really in a rush to meet that "one" guy right now but i would like to. the thread was pretty much me venting about some of my loneliness. that paticular day i was having a rough day and the fear of being alone forever popped into my mind. anyway, i appreciate everyones kind words. thank you all. misq4ever i'm sorry cause i know what you are going through, but just wait till you have that little baby, it'll all be worth it. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/4/2005 11:07:01 AM | I know... I can't wait. but you know 15 weeks can be a long time when you're looking forward to something but when you're not, it just flies. Lately it seems like just yesterday I was peeing on that stick and waiting the interminable 3 minutes for the result.  Now, just the two weeks between OB appointments has me tearing my hair out. All I can say right now about the jackass father is this: He'd better get his head on straight or he won't have any rights to his child. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/4/2005 11:28:07 AM | the child will always look for his/her dad, and love him dearly when he is 18 and leaves the house. any man who played the step dad during his formative years is left in the cold and unappreciated. so why even go through all the sacrifice. I tried it once and it was a thankless venture. my advice to all men, is if they go in, they should see as thankless job and should not expect anything back from the child, mother and the run-away dad. but should only say it's God's work and expect the reward from God.
men should not let the beauty of the mother fool them either. the mothers become ****es later on when they feel you have saved them and don't need your services or help any more.
I will not touch any woman with a baby with a 100-foot pole. | |
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| is it just me or are men terified of women with babies?
Posted: 9/4/2005 11:42:29 AM | You just havn't meet the right man. There are plenty of us willing to date single moms. The one's that don't aproch you are not ready for children. Just take your time. As someone stated earlier your babys more importent. I know for me I'm more attracted to a woman that can put her baby's needs above her own or mine. A goof man will understand that. Don't worry he's out there and Im sur you'll find himor hell find you. Good Luck and remember your baby comes first.  | |
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