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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??      Home login  
 AUTHOR
 -lebanese-lion--
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 1
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??Page 1 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
why is it that men my age get flamed so hard for wanting to date older women? is it a "golden rule" that they wont do it? I have found that in person, older women are just attracted to me. period. but here on the net, seems like alot of older women think 25yo is too immature. is this the case?
 CountrySugar
Joined: 7/15/2005
Msg: 2
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 10:07:38 AM
I don't see anything wrong with younger men datin older women and visa versa..as long as both are adults and that's what they want, why not, i never could see the big deal..but that's just me, i'm rather immature i usually date younger men and most of my friends are between 26 and 36 .. i have very few friends my age and some older but we really don't have all that much in common...
 -lebanese-lion--
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 3
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 10:12:19 AM
THATS funny you say that, cause i really dont have anything in common with my friends my own age, they are all still in partying and sleepin in late mode. I have to work and make my life a success, not waiting on anyone else!
 CountrySugar
Joined: 7/15/2005
Msg: 4
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 10:17:24 AM
well there ya go, go with what makes ya happy darlin, no sense doin what don't make you happy just cause others think it's the right thing to do
 lilkitten
Joined: 8/6/2005
Msg: 5
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 10:25:03 AM
You are a rarity lebanese....most 25 yr olds are still into partying. Perhaps the first thing that crosses the mind of older women online, is that you are looking to be 'kept' and pass judgement before actually talking with you. Don't give up though...there will be someone who is interested in getting to know the real you.
 the good names are taken
Joined: 9/5/2005
Msg: 6
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 11:39:56 AM
Well as one of those older women-I certainly see nothing wrong with it.I find I have very little in common with men my age, who seem to think it is time to settle in on the sofa and wait for retirement.Maybe that is why I'm still single-not willing to settle for that.I still attract attention of younger men so why not go for it.
 iluvmonkeys2
Joined: 8/31/2004
Msg: 7
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 11:41:04 AM
personally i love younger men. i haven't dated anyone older in quite some time. maturity, IMO, has nothing whatever to do with age. i've met some younger men who are much more mature than any older man i know. i think the problem you are experiencing is two fold. first many younger men are only looking for sex when it comes to older women. then again there are some older women happy to oblige. secondly, as a result of #1, some older women have become wary thinking that the only reason a younger man would be interested in them is sex. i think mature younger men, like yourself, have much to offer. besides which, age is nuttin' but a number and completely irrelevant. more important is the relationship between two people and how they interact together.
 Swepea40
Joined: 8/6/2005
Msg: 8
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 11:51:20 AM
Im an older woman that dates younger men..I find I don't really connect with men my own age at times..I guess it depends on the person as well..My last boyfriend was 26 and he was more mature than any 40 year ive dated!! I say if it's what you want to do than do it!!
 -lebanese-lion--
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 9
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 1:51:47 PM
right on... this is all good stuff... likin to hear it all, and know that some women actually can appreciate a younger guy who is a little more mature than the average. I agree with ^ up there. mature women do play nice, and are usually a little more sophisticated, and also more classy, and thats what gets me goin!!!
 vixen669
Joined: 8/19/2005
Msg: 10
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 2:09:28 PM
L.Lion> Here is the deal. It is much harder for an older woman to be accepted for dating younger guys. Why people can't just mind there own business is a good question. I am one of those. I DON'T LIKE OLD PEOPLE! LOL...I am 50, and even though I am always getting asked out by guys in their 20's, it doesn't make it easier for me. I have been out before with a guy who did look much younger and the looks I got....were not pretty! You would have thought I was MaryK out with Billy!!!...It really should be a decision left up to the two people involved. I love younger guys! THEY ARE FUN, OUTRAGEOUS,SEXY AND HAVE A LIBIDO,that matches mine! BUT...I also like a guy who is looking for a relationship not just a good time. This is where I get into trouble.Haven't met a younger guy looking for forever. Flip side> I get NASTY EMAILS ON HERE FROM OLD,BALD,FAT GUYS THAT ARE PISSED AT ME FOR WANTING YOUNGER, SEXY GUYS!!!!.I have to laugh...YOU KNOW THEY WOULD RATHER DATE Brittany Spears than some old woman. But a gal like that won't give them the time...UNLESS THEY HAVE MONEY...And that is another thing...I could be on the side of the road without a bottle of water...and I WILL NOT USE A GUY FOR HIS MONEY!!!! But that is just me. I say if you want an OLDER WOMAN...GO FOR IT! SHE KNOWS WHAT SHE WANTS, AND DOESN'T EXPECT YOU TO SUPPORT HER,AND USUALLY IS MUCH MORE AGGRESSIVE IN BED. Good luck, Vix
 Swepea40
Joined: 8/6/2005
Msg: 11
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 2:26:46 PM
The only problem I find when dating younger men is that im all done having children and so I have to make that clear up front..Also im looking for long term and thats kind of hard to find with the younger men...
 tantalizing
Joined: 7/31/2005
Msg: 12
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 8:23:23 PM
i suppose once i got over the initial shock that someone 25 was hot for me it would be ok..lol
 shore66
Joined: 5/23/2004
Msg: 13
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 9:03:51 PM
^^^^ yes, once over the shock it can be more than ok! LOL
 ChitChat
Joined: 6/1/2005
Msg: 14
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/17/2005 9:49:35 PM
I see that you're asking this Q about 'online' women. Okie..let me answer based on my 'experience' with the younger online group.

Generally, their original *cough* e-mail goes something like this:

'Do you date/dig younger men?'..or...'I like older women, do you have a problem with that?'

OMG!!!! If you're younger than I am...DoN't rub it in my face! lol! That just hurts!!

If you're playing the 'maturity' card, as in being just as mature (Oh God, please don't tell me mature means OlD..I am SoooOO not OlD..and mature?! eeek! I suppose I can wear that skirt in public when required) as I am just go ahead and be mature! Don't try and wear it as a valuable thing! Who's to say I really want mature?

What's mature anyway?

Yes, please don't call me OlDeR. I'm still a GirL (girls can have class too, yes?)

CC

p.s. Then again, if I send the 'Thanks for a wonderful message, but you are too young' please accept gracefully and carry on (soooooooo annoying to get the 'oh, c'mon, I'm not that much younger than you messages).
 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 15
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 9:25:22 AM
Funny, I just got emailed by a very nice looking 25 y/o who lives in my city. I had plans for the weekend, but did say that I have a son 26, blah blah about a romantic relationship. He wrote back a nice email and still wants to meet me. I think after reading this I'll meet him. I don't know if it's the hangup because I have kids his age....the youngest I've ever dated was 10 years younger, he's 23 years younger...that's a bit more of a stretch. What the heck I guess i can go meet him for a drink...I'm with tantalizing though, it's not really shock, but I honestly don't see why all these younger guys and I've had a TON of them, why they're attracted to me. Yeah, I think I look "decent" maybe for my age, but I don't look 25!! hahaha Okay, so I'll just meet him and try to deal with my own hangups.
 shore66
Joined: 5/23/2004
Msg: 16
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 9:56:40 AM
bucsgirl-

I think the right attitude IS to say, "What the heck I guess i can go meet him for a drink."

I will never forget the first younger (20 yrs) man who wanted to go out with me. It was 6 years ago, and I was utterly puzzled by what he could see in me, but I took the "what the heck" attitude and met him, and was I ever glad I did! Not only did he and I have a short but sweet relationship (and we are still friends), but it opened my eyes to the fact that the younger men and I "clicked" in a way that I don't with men my own age.

And the potential for friendship is there as well. One of my best friends is a guy who is 30 years younger than I. We never had any type of dating, sexual or romantic relationship, but for the last 5 years we have found each other amusing company, and confide in each other in a way that we don't with other people.

In the end I think it is best not to pigeon-hole people, including yourself, and to be open to all sorts of new experiences.
 iluvmonkeys2
Joined: 8/31/2004
Msg: 17
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 10:10:29 AM
good for you bucs! great attitude! you just never know what you might find if you open yourself up. like shore, one of the best relationships i have had was with a sweet thing 20 years younger and i learned the same thing about myself. i just seem to get along with younger men better. go figure!
 Sasquatch2
Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 18
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 10:13:38 AM
GO FOR IT BUCS! (Oh,32N,65 in answer to your Q;)

There's nothing wrong with wanting to be with someone you're
attracted to, so long as both parties are honest and available.
I think it's pretty common for a lot of women,regardless of age,
to wonder if a younger (or older!) man is only after that one thing.
The universal problem for us guys is proving our sincerity in a world
where honesty is unfortunately the rarity.

Best of luck to all concerned!
 -lebanese-lion--
Joined: 5/23/2005
Msg: 19
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 11:52:44 AM
chitchat- now when i say mature, i dont mean it in an age manner- am referring to the fact that women over the age of 30 seem to have their ducks in a row. and usually have already had children, and have a decent job, and most have gotten the partying out of their lives.. this is what i want. i want someone that is mature, has their stuff together, no a emotional basket case, and knows what she wants out of life, and is usually more comfortable with their bodies.
and as far as the internet thing goes- well, there arent really any women i am attracted to in the age range i am looking for in my city, so that leaves all my other options open in person, i have absolutely NO PROBLEM going up to someone that interests me and introducing myself to get to know them better. so, its not just for the 'net thing, its for real life action also.
and thanks ladies.. i appreciate all your assistance in helping me be more confident in my approaches to "mature" ladies

and for the record- mature means MATURE. not a number or age-- its just MATURE!!
 Walksalonewoman
Joined: 6/18/2005
Msg: 20
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 12:40:54 PM
The first time I was contacted by my 25 year old 'friend', the first thing he said was... it's about time you recognized me'! I had been avoiding him for quite some time merely because of the age difference. We've been talking, then seeing each other, over a year now. I'm 62 and he likes me just as I am. The age card never comes up anymore. He is an extremely handsome, virile man and it still boggles my mind. But, we relate as man and woman, not younger and older. I always say.. don't question it and if it ain't broke.. don't fix it!
 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 21
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 2:16:31 PM
I know guys and thanks to one of my beautiful ladies I always admire the sexy miss shore, and to my male twin sas...hahaha. I guess I just have it in my head that the only attraction is a more experienced sexual partner. I haven't actually DATED someone that much younger, 10 years younger once, 2 years. Only reason I think that is in chatting with some of these guys to find out their interest, EVERY single one has admitted they wanted to "be with" an older woman. I don't think you need to be a rocket scientist to figure that out, so I assumed they meant sexually. That is so NOT what I want, but I guess I'll go meet this guy and have a drink.
 ksue44
Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 22
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 2:38:55 PM
Leb - perhaps some of the 20 something men are jealous of you. Now, if there's anyone out that wants to come out and say "its so bad to date an older woman", I'll take them across my knee and right now! Okay, let me back pedal just a bit. This goes for either of the sexes, whether you are younger, older, or the same age of your prospective mate, what is the intent? If the intentions are honorable and sincere, then I say "Go For It".

However, if you're looking at being kept and that's not in her game plan, I guarantee, she's older, wiser, and more experienced than you are, and she'll bury you quick!

I say "hooray" that we older dames can go out with the younger guys, its about time!!! Besides, the gripe I have about men, is they croak 7 years earlier than women do, so it almost makes sense for younger man/older woman!
 shore66
Joined: 5/23/2004
Msg: 23
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 2:46:53 PM
bucsgirl -

Yeah, the ever popular "want to be with an older woman."

Let's face it, that IS all a lot of younger guys are looking for - to fulfill a fantasy of sex with an older woman. But there are others, and you will never find them if you let the stereotypes stand in your way.


Good luck!
 bucsgirl
Joined: 3/2/2005
Msg: 24
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 2:52:24 PM
Yeah you guys are right.....I just have a hangup like I'm picturing dating one of my son's friends, some of them still pretend flirt with me and my kids gag...hahaha. But you're right, I should just meet him for a drink and see what's up with him and put my stereotyped opinions aside and just look at him as a man who's shown some interest in meeting me. That's really all it is anyway. Hugs to all, you guys are the best!!
 The Anti-Date
Joined: 8/29/2005
Msg: 25
is it so bad to want an OLDER WOMAN??
Posted: 9/18/2005 4:02:45 PM
Personally I am suspicious of a guy in his 20's who is interested in me. And I just don't think I'd have a whole lot in common with someone that much younger than me. I have two kids, a career and all the responsibilities that go with that.

Why are younger men interested in older women? My first thought is that they want someone sexually experienced, but not for a long term relationship. Just some lessons
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