| How soon is too soon?
Posted: 9/18/2005 9:12:34 AM | In my alternate careers (of which I have two), I've been seeing some disturbing trends:
A)"We've only known each other for two months...Will you marry me?"
So you think you know everything about this other person in 8 short weeks your mind is made up and you now want to spend the rest of your life with them? I may know them 3x longer than you do and I still wouldn't pop the $64,000 Question™.
Are these people on "The Amazing Race 4: The Race To The Altar"? (I'm surprised CBS hasn't snapped that up.) Unless they are looking for a challenge, this seems risky. In 8 weeks, you will never know their favorite Extra Value Menu item at Burger King. You'll come home with the wrong one and ***BAM***!!!!!!
B)"Here's the engagement ring...and it has keys to my home/condo/apartment on them. Move in with me....tomorrow!"
What does this accomplish? You aren't even married yet and you want to see what little spark it takes to ignite a huge argument capable of blowing the wedding to shreds (that little spark might be a minute as installing a new toilet paper roll incorrectly or not doing it at all)? As a mobile DJ & wedding videographer, I call on brides all the time. I do that because 99% of the grooms don't know d*ck about their own wedding, which is sad. But every time I call and get an answering machine and hear his voice announce their names for the one number, it sends me into seizures.
What? Is your love for each other so strong you can't stay apart for the six months it takes to plan a standard wedding? Or are you the jealous type, afraid if they aren't under the same roof with you during that six month time, they might leave you? If you fall under the latter, you are a pansy. Under the former, you are clearly delirious and must seek professional shock treatment (they use 480 volt, three phase power, not the weak 110 volt household current). What is the explanation for this phenomenon?
And I wonder why I'm still single. I've worked enough weddings in two years to cure me from wanting to be married and that term is just about out of my vocabulary.  | |
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