| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 3:03:07 PM | So everyone has had a bully....
What do you do when you work with 5?
Any tips? | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 5:36:15 PM | My tip would be to not assault anyone in the workplace.
Missmuah, care to share a bit of detail? | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 6:01:05 PM | Find another job, or report them, or sit them up to get caught. 
Are you could do like most of the world, and sue the place you work at for allowing them to harras you. Provideing you reported it. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 6:41:03 PM | buy yourself a book of 'curses' and put a spell on each one of them!
 | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 6:45:17 PM | Bullies are predators. Don't allow yourself to be prey. Watch your body language.
And if they do something against company policy.. don't hesitate to go to your alpha (i.e. the boss)
man I need to get around humans more. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 7:03:48 PM | fear is something you have to allow and accept.. keep in mind i will not fear theses people..
as a man i have had to deal with many.. normaly if you stand up to them the back down.. there making fun of you to keep their own short commings a secret and the joke off of them..
talk to the boss and say i am not going to put up with this.. i am here to work a job not relive high school.. | |
|
Klo
|
Joined: 5/2/2004
Msg: 7 | |
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 7:47:44 PM | | hell, id tell them to f*ck off...or beat them up! I had a bully in 8th grade and she gave me sh*t for no reason, so I solved it by beating her prissy little a$$...needless to say, she(and her friends) never messed with me again. | |
|
Dryad
|
Joined: 7/19/2005
Msg: 8 | |
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 9:17:58 PM | Need to know a bit more; are they co-workers, your boss, people you manage?
It’s a new job? Yes?
With the little bit I know, above all … be professional.
Stand up for yourself, but do it in a firm, respectful way.
Meet them at their intensity level in conversation and nonverbal (watch your body language was good advice), and keep to the higher ground (don’t get into a shouting match though).
Address problems when they are small. Call them on issues right away before they become problems (private is better initially, but it’s work, if you need the manager to get involved do it).
Watch how much personal information you let out, bullies will twist it against you.
Know what your job responsibilities are. You don’t have to like the people you work with, but it does make a better environment if you’re not actively sabotaging each other. If you are always doing favours (pulling more than your share of the load), make the reciprocal favour up front with them (i.e. I’ll take your shift, if you take this one for me).
The best way to loose an enemy is to turn them into a friend. However, friend doesn’t mean doormat. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 9:45:22 PM | ^ Good plan.
Divide and conquer also works.
Anyways..
"mean people suck" | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 9:55:52 PM | yeah frrosty mean ppl do suck, they suck rocks
op looks like everbody is givin you some good advice....i actually like what dragonn said about knowin tha enemy.....when someone treats ya mean and ya aint never give em no call to, theres gotta be somethin twistin thier tail....anger usually has fear a hidin behind it...so i would look to see what these bullies are a fearin and try to address or calm thier fears....in a non threatenin but i aint atakin no crap either kinda way....
as long as you can deal with tha face in tha mirror an sleep calm at night...i wouldnt even wander about what goes on in a bully's head cavity..... | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/23/2005 11:36:40 PM | *shrugs*
Either that or kick er in the box.
what...
? | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/24/2005 12:36:23 AM | When bullies know they bother you they do it more often.
Keep your friends close and your enemies even closer. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/24/2005 4:35:40 AM | Kill one and scare the others..... | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/24/2005 4:47:30 AM | | You know those foam bricks they used to sell to people years ago ? You were supposed to throw these things at whatever to help vent your frustration when you were pissed off or something. Well, get a real brick. It'll be more satisfying. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/25/2005 11:41:00 PM | well as for detail all...
Pretty much Im a outcast. Which I dont really care who likes me or not but this last time it was them (5 of em) asking everyone out for drinks talking about it all week being total cun%s about it and then to make themselves feel better asking me 30 mins before the end of the work day and saying "oh we just didnt realize we hadnt asked you" give me a freaking break. We work in the same room not cubicals but an actual open room. and you forgot? omg I hope their conciences are clear cause of it. Pretty much its rude as hell to have to deal with the talking the backstabbing. As for my manager lets put it this way...if I bi!ch there are 5-7 of them...verses me...lol you think they'll address it...nope, just fire me for being the problem. Since Im the one thats the outcast easier to get ride of one then 7.
Its bulls$it but thats life right? Thanks for all the advice :) has been insightful.
J | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 6:48:35 AM | it's cool to be different than everyone else... lord knows i'm quite a bit different than my co-workers but i try to keep my personal style under wraps while i'm at work. i work in corporate america so i have to be pretty conservative at work. at first i didn't like it but soon came to realize that blending in was the best option for me considering i love the company i work for and would like to retire there in the end. the only thing that stands out about me these days is my hair color but everyone is used to that...
if you can go to work, do your job, go home and be happy... kudos to you but it sounds like you may want to consider a career move. i've found that money doesn't make a job better if you don't want to get up and go to work in the mornin'. ;) you'll find a place to work where you'll fit in perfect! til then... don't let the bullies get to you or they'll just keep peckin' at ya. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 7:21:44 AM | People bully those who don't stand up for themselves. They are lacking in their own life and the only way to get by is to make someone else suffer.
I would assume that the minute you stick up for yourself and let them know that you are not a pushover, they will stop all together. A lot of times they do it out of jelousy, which is fine. You know you are above them anyways. Next time you go to lunch, pull out the ole cell and talk to a friend in front of them. Make a mound into a mountain by discussing something that you guys did in which you had a blast at. Nothing wrong with exgerrating to an extent that it will piss them off even more! HAHA!
Good luck! | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 9:09:40 AM | You know, I can't remember the last time I let somebody bully me. Sure, people have tried but once I weighed everything out, I decided that I really didn't have the energy for stewing in their shit. I actually tell people like that to go and **** themselves once I'm sure that they are mistaking my kindness for weakness. I'll wait for them to do something otherwise trivial and minor in the "offending me" department and then I'll just walk up calmly, look them in the eye and say "Go and **** yourself". They won't do anything for two reasons : 1) Now they realize you aren't going to be their punching bag after all and 2)They know inwardly that they deserved it anyway. They can try to argue I suppose but I've never had it happen yet where they did. Works for me. In fact, that always sets people straight right quick. Even the ones you aren't directing your anger at. Sure, they'll go and tell their little clique all about what a sourpuss you are and they'll warn everybody else within earshot as well but it won't matter in the long run. People already know you anyway so they'll decide for themselves what to think of it. Either way, they won't mess with you again and after a while you'll find them even trying to become friends with you as long as you remain open and friendly otherwise.
It goes like that every time. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 9:19:33 AM | Indifference is FUN, makes people consider things a little more closely too. Try something like "Awww, that totally sucks that I'm gonna miss it, but I have plans with the girls from my last job, they would trip if I didn't come, anyways, you guys will have a blast... hey can I borrow your stapler?"
NEVA EVA show weakness... they are sick to want to see it, BAD GIRLS!
| |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 11:16:13 AM | | I like superdame's advice! Keep 'em confused, project confidence, and by all means...keep your friends close and your enemies closer. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 6:48:55 PM | best advice so far sparklepants... "keep your friends close and your enemies closer." you'd be amazed at how wonderful that works.  | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/26/2005 7:55:06 PM | I'm having bully issues tonight. There's one girl here who's decided that no matter what I do or what I say, it's wrong. Even when I'm doing my job to assist her.
Very difficult when you're tethered to a desk 8 hours a day. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/27/2005 6:15:08 AM | | hand her a shovel norolim. ;) sometimes people learn better from inside the grave they dig for themselves... | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/27/2005 8:33:24 AM | | I dealt with this crap in high school. Don't give them the pleasure of responding, in other words, ignore them COMPLETELY. Unless they have something work related to talk about. Try making friends with all the guys and tell them what ****es they are, and they'll be jealous. OH yes,...they will. You don't have to worry about that crap with guys. | |
|
| Mean Girls
Posted: 9/27/2005 8:34:08 AM | ^^^
She'd probably beat me over the head with it. | |
|
Home
login 