| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 7:25:18 PM | An almost dating experience:
Been emailing and chatting with a guy for a few weeks... daily messages and pages of conversations about life, dating and relationships. Thought everything was going well... have talked about meeting, what it will be like etc. etc. All of a sudden, nothing... no emails, no messages, no nothing... I don't get it! Do people come here to have email marathons, or do they actually want to meet in person???? Do ya think I should be reading "He's Just Not That Into You?" | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 7:53:24 PM | | The dude fits under the chapter 'Tools I Don't Need in My Life.' | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 7:54:29 PM | So true! I was starting to think it was me!
Thanks for the reply! | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:01:22 PM | No, what I think you should read into it is that he was lying about something like appearance or success and he was just having a little fantasy time with your emails. Knew if you met the cover would be revealed.
He probably liked you and thats why he kept emailing. I say it is more compliment than insult. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:04:17 PM | | maybe or maybe....in the course of the conversations ..he figured you weren't really a match for him. Don't take it personally....there's lots of other fishies out there. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:06:14 PM | | I think I like that one better... thanks ekko. | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 10 | |
| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:16:20 PM | | Let it go! "He's Just Not That Into You" has some good advice. The best advice, is not to have someone validate your life or your self worth. Make sure that your life is full, and that it's not an urgent need to find that special one. Don't go crazy analyzing why someone hasn't written or called, it's a waste of energy. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:16:40 PM | | How long has it been with no contact from him? Have you tried contacting him again and asking what's up? If it hasn't been very long, then it's not something to worry so much about. Also, he may have had something come up like a family emergency, he had to go out of town for work, his computer isn't working...or maybe he got spooked about meeting for some reason...if he thinks you're moving too fast or that he is, he may have backed away a little...he may have also met someone and doesn't feel a need to tell you (some people are like that). | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:22:41 PM | | Good advice... I'm not necessarily obsessing about it (well, maybe I am a little)... it's more that I have to be in the know, ya know? | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:28:52 PM | | ksue44 pretty summed up the best advice anyone can give you. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 8:54:12 PM | Dayum.. adventure girl.. that sux.. I'm sorry that happened to you...
he must be married or really scary looking.......
Don't invest soooo much time...getting to know someone via E-mail!!!!
Do E-mail or IMing... then it needs to move to phone pretty quickly... or your not gonna meet!!!
Usually ... ya talk.... and the 1st conversation or 2nd .... ya'll decide if you're interested in meeting and set something up!
I've met 3 great people from this site so far..... (in person!) | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 9:06:04 PM | | What was his profile like? What did it say he was looking for? | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 9:17:17 PM | People not looking like their picture, that's a whole other story!
I agree with the fact that things should not progress too much over email... this was my first mistake. I'm thinking he's married... it's easier then thinking he's scary looking lol! I'm not about to waste my time emailing for the rest of my life... I want to date, otherwise I wouldn't be here...
To answer questions... his profile is cute... nothing weird or sexual etc... his emails are personal (but not too personal) and well spoken... he has never said or done anything to make me think that he's a freak... he sounds great on the telephone (eventhough we have only spoken twice)... has anyone had this same experience?
GUYS? How are we supposed to know you're interested?
I have met some great people too, and I'm not going to let this ruin my experience...
Cheers everyone! | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 9:43:14 PM |
Good advice... I'm not necessarily obsessing about it (well, maybe I am a little)... it's more that I have to be in the know, ya know?
Yep, I know...been there too ;) And not knowing is the worst...I'd much rather they just said "Hey, I'm not interested" if they're not. it's hard not to over analyze about it when one is left hanging...just don't think it's YOUR fault, because it's NOT. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 9:56:17 PM | | Thank GOD we get wiser as we get older (about most things, anyway)! Would have been much easier to hear that then nothing at all. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 10:40:26 PM | I have a little input.
Did he ever offer you, or give you his phone number? Did you ever call him if you have his number? If he didn't give you his number then he's probably hiding something...like being married or seeing someone already, and looking for a little on the side. Red flag a guy that won't give you his number and tell you to call "any time" and leave a message if he isn't home. Ask if it's his home or cel #. If it's a cel, ask for his home #. If he won't give it out...run and don't look back, he's not honest! Call his home # when you know he's not there. Don't leave a message, just listen for flags like "You've reached the Smith's." I always give a gal my home # , but explain my answering machine that says: Hi, you've reached Steve and Amanda... but I explain Amanda is my 16 YO daughter that visits on some weekends. I also offer to email a PIC of my daughter to them. If a guy you are talking to on the phone abruptly says : "I gotta go now" and hangs up immediatly, his wife/girlfriend probably just showed up.
Did you exchange pictures? If so, was it early in email exchanges? I have emailed women w/o pics and got along great until you exchange pics. Let's face it... a picture is worth a thousand words. I'm attracted to brunettes, and I prefer soft brown eyes. Only some blondes do anything for me. Even if they were supermodels, blondes w/blue eyes just don't do much for me, but a dirty blonde w/brown eyes can be very attractive to me. I could read a thousand ads that intrigue me, but only choose 1 to respond to because the pictures didn't do anything for me. Some guys are also intimidated by beautiful women and think "I'd never have a chance with her."
The defination of "average" build is a gray area. What gals think of an average build, and what guys think can be two entirely different interpretations. I have met gals that said they were average, but have met a couple in person that I considered to be BBW's, or at least 30 #'s overweight. I don't consider that to be average. Average to me is height/weight proportionate.
The words "wild side" in your ad could be interpreted as "kinky" and intrigued him. He could have had a low self esteem, or been shy, having a fantasy in his mind that when push comes to shove, scared him, so his "fight or flight syndrome" in his sympathetic nervous system chose flight ( I describe my "kinky" side as "erotic", which tones it down and leaves much more to the imagination LOL).
Pisces women (the greatest women in the world) are also pretty emotional, but emotions scare some guys away. Look for a water sign other than a Pisces guy, like a Cancer or Scorpio (hey... I'm a Scorpio and my chart says my soulmate is a Pisces). Too bad we live in different countries.
Finally in conclusion, either put a pic in your ad, or a sentence in your ad that says you can email a pic upon request. That will eliminate a lot of needless emails. People are attracted to what they find physically attractive. Mental attraction is good, but mental and physical attraction is the icing on the cake! | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 10:52:33 PM | Maybe you can go to his work place and stew up a rabbit in their breakroom. j/k
There are many nice guys out there for you to meet. | |
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| I am so frustrated!
Posted: 10/19/2005 11:04:40 PM | | I thought of that... then thought better of it LOL! Thanks though, for the support deicer! | |
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| A little less frustrated...
Posted: 10/19/2005 11:20:55 PM | RN, thanks for your honest input and your kind gestures... it's all appreciated.
I gotta get some guts and post my picture I KNOW... my small town anxieties are getting the best of me.
We did happen to exchange pics right away... and he seemed more interested then not once he saw what I looked like. The cell phone thing is true though... I guess my question to that would be WHY would he bother telling me all that he did if it was all bullshit?
This is a great discussion, by the way, as it has become more of an enquiry about this subject in general then about this man.
As he did not find me on this site, the wild side thing is not applicable, however, will keep that in mind when I do some changes... "kinky" is definitely not the impression I was trying to make when I was busy writing about me!
Gonna look up some info on Scorpios now, that's for sure LOL! How do you know so much about Pisces women?
Cheers! | |
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| A little less frustrated...
Posted: 10/20/2005 12:17:51 AM | That's happened to me too - and this guy did give me his number.
They must have a wee hair up their ass. | |
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