| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/27/2005 7:24:06 AM | Hey, whats up all. Here's the deal: I finally start talking to a few guys that obviously liked what I had to say in my profile, liked my picture, and were interested in getting to know me. All of a sudden, I might have said something wrong, but they stop responding! We exchanged a few e-mails and then the e-mails stop. Why is it, that the last e-mail I sent, is read, and just sits in their inbox and rots?? I see these people online sometimes...and they don't even bother writing back!! Why don't they just delete the e-mail,or say they aren't interested anymore? Have they found "something better"? Also, how about when I first e-mail someone, they will read it and not reply?? Whats up with this? Is it just me, or is this just cruel?? I know there is nothing wrong with me, but a few guys did this to me that I was interested in getting to know. It has now been 5 days since I heard a response from them and they have been online these past 5 days. What should I do? Why are they treating me like that??  | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/27/2005 7:44:29 AM | | It's easier to blow someone off buy not e-mailing someone back. It's cruel but that is the trend with online/chatting. Ever have someone just close their chat window without saying bye? It's the online way. Or you think things are good and poof they 'disappear' but you see them chatting or notice that they still check their mail. Some people just don't have common decency or the courage to say hey sorry but I'm going to discontinue chatting or hey it's been great chatting with you but I have found someone. And on the up side, there are people who are honest and will respond back. Just think that they filtered themselves out and you didn't have to get your hands dirty. Just take it for what it is-chatting with strangers. You never know what you're going to get/find and that is the attraction/apeal to this fetish of typing into cyberspace. Have fun with it. If someone doesn't respond back, it's their loss. Good luck! Happy typing! | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/27/2005 8:21:49 AM | Happened to me also, Paw. You're not alone. We all go through it. It's some people's way of telling you they're no longer interested in you. Perhaps they saw themselves as being incompatible with you. Perhaps they met a mate in that short span of time. Perhaps they finally read your profile.
Sometimes it's about courtesy. Sometimes it's about fear, a very strong motivator in our lives.
Michael | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/29/2005 10:32:53 AM | | well I guess I am stupid to all this but how do you even know that he read your emails and they are sitting in his inbox?? That makes me worry since I rarely respond to the emails I get after reading them. I find that most men don't take the time to read my profile and write to me when they are too far away or too young or married even though I specified in my profile what I am looking for. So, how do you check it out?? | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/29/2005 2:00:09 PM | "Ever have someone read your e-mails and not delete them, and they don't reply??" Absolutely, and to be honest it does bother me sometimes. If I am taking the time to write the e-mail I think that they should at least say something. But I'm not gonna go any further because sometimes I work myself into a frenzy with my rants. Do you let a bad date ruin your life? Usually not, so dust yourself off and keep looking and writin' those e-mails and in due time it'll pay off.  | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/29/2005 8:05:30 PM | | Internet 'ettiquette' is different from the real world 'ettiquete'. Why do we always assume everyone is hooked to their pc 24\7? and owes us a response. You are meeting masses and masses more people than you would in real life situation. You arent face to face like the real world where most people will say see you later to be polite. Acutally event hen what would a person do in the real world?... He/she might do the "Ill call you" thing so in a way its the same thing. I agree it would be nice BUT sometimes due to volumes and time frames and yes lets say it non-interest, people dont get a chance or just dont wnat to get back to you. If anything I think I am the one who is intruding on their space. That is seriously how I view it. So if I message someone and they dont message back I simply respect their wish not to correspond and MOVE ON. Its ok. | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/29/2005 8:52:09 PM | Courtesy is fresh... and the time some people take, and the originality they convey... make a great impression.
I would rather someone flaked early on then find out about it later. I would think for most that would make it easier. You have to understand that for some, being organized and compassionate is hard work.
Personally I like to write back those who take the time to get a hold of me, even with my busy schedule. A brief reply I can offer, even when I am uninterested. I enjoy being positive as it carries over into what I am working on.
When you look at it as a filter it will give you the positive energy to meet those special people. | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 10/29/2005 11:18:47 PM | I'm willing to bet that most people don't reply to the people that are uninteresting to them. In my experience I have sent loads of messages to people, some longer and more creative than others but for the most part they are read and then sit and rot or just deleted with no responce. Maybe it's just me but that doesn't strike me as too out of the normal on this site unless your one of the "pretty people".  LOL | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 3/28/2008 2:55:57 PM | It's happened to me several times. Don't get rattled by it, as redamber once said it's a lot easier to not reply than it is to reply and have the other person reply back and start a conversation you honestly don't want no part of.
It may suck, but that's how things are on these sites. Comes with the territory. | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 3/28/2008 3:58:37 PM | I've had the same happen.
I lost interest, it's cool with me, if they find no reason to further speak with me, then I have found one of my own to not speak with them either.
Or, they may have forgot or... like me, I was flooding with messages one time, that it became more than a page, I didn't notice that fact for awhile. Perhaps your message could be sitting on another page? I'm not sure what to say. It's one thing if you contact them 2 x and are ignored, but once... maybe the message just got lost from their view? | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 3/28/2008 4:47:11 PM | This could happen for one, of or many, reasons which are nothing to do with you:-
1. They are married and their wife is on the prowl of their internet sites so they have to destroy the 'evidence' - this in my experience has been the more likely than I had previously thought and some men who at first appear really keen can disappear like the Titanic!
2. They have found someone else and are too loved up to tell you
3. They are fantasists and getting to know them better might blow their cover
4. For some reason they cant get internet access, maybe due to illness or redundancy
(I would imagine that if they are surreptitiously using their POF email at work then it would make sense to destroy the 'evidence'.)
5. They just forgot maybe because they have been snowed under with lots of emails.
From my experience people rarely do something knowingly cruel or mean especially to someone they hardly know, and I would guess that these people you have been in contact with are just at the acquaintance stage.
I would suggest that if you make the first contact to make it light and flirty, inviting a short reply, it might take longer to get to know someone, but if you let your playful side show through, they might stick around ... All things being equal!! | |
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| Ever have someone read your e-mails and don't delete them, but don't reply either??
Posted: 3/28/2008 5:08:22 PM |
Why is it, that the last e-mail I sent, is read, and just sits in their inbox and rots??
Uh, because they got..."distracted".
I see these people online sometimes...and they don't even bother writing back!! Why don't they just delete the e-mail,or say they aren't interested anymore?
They are saying that they aren't interested, by default. Not responding is valid and efficient form of communication just like any other.
Have they found "something better"?
Maybe. Perhaps, they actually found someone. Or maybe they're just shooting emoticons at someone else's collection of pixels. Possibly, they're engaged in an online game of checkers, pong or solitaire. Or, if he's a goodie...maybe he's at the beach or gone skiing.
Also, how about when I first e-mail someone, they will read it and not reply?? Whats up with this?
Yep. They will. Again, no response is effectively a response in itself.
Is it just me, or is this just cruel??
Nope it's not cruel. I certainly don't feel that I owe any old stranger in the public domain an in depth analysis of why I'm not interested and I certainly don't expect one either. If I have perceived some fault or flaws that need to be acknowledged, I'd rather hear about them from someone who actually knows me and therefore, their opinion has some credibility.
I know there is nothing wrong with me, but a few guys did this to me that I was interested in getting to know. It has now been 5 days since I heard a response from them and they have been online these past 5 days. What should I do? Why are they treating me like that??
If you know truly know that there's nothing "wrong" with you, just laugh, shake your head and think to yourself "What a schmuck for passing me by!" There's really nothing else you can do and I don't see the point in getting all worked up about how some strange guy on the internet behaves. Why bother waiting around for someone who treats you in a way you dislike? | |
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