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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/24/2005 7:58:22 PM | Most likely no.... unless it was due to a injury
and not a diesease. I have buried enough friends.....
and family... I wish to know someone healthy.
That does not make me shallow... that makes me
unable to handle any more death.....
rainbow | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/24/2005 8:23:01 PM | LOL...quite the loaded question.
I'll admit to being what you deemed as being handicapped....although this chair has not been with me from birth. It is the result of an auto accident where I lost far more than the use of my legs. I am what would be called the "lucky one"....go figure?
As a "handicapped" person (FRICKING HELL....I HATE that term) I would like to think that able bodied persons would think that they are capable of dating someone who is in a position such as I am - however, the truth is that it is very hard to deal with. The truth is that I come with baggage, as well as the perks (think GREAT parking spots! LOL) and for the majority of the men that I have met, that is just too much for them to handle.
It is a fact of my life, and although I have met some outstanding men....I have also met some men, who upon realizing that the chair is permanently glued to my ass.,....have run in the opposite direction. Not all men are that way - and I know that. I honestly, honestly don;t think that I have any more troubles meeting the Mr. Right than what able bodied women do. But that is only my 2 cents worth. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/24/2005 9:57:52 PM | Hooray for the parking! ;)
I partially agree with AbH about the chances to meet the right person. I don't see mine as any less than before, as the kind of person I want to be with hasn't changed. Even without this challenge, I didn't want to date someone who couldn't see past one. I do think that does narrow down the field, though. There are a number of people who aren't up to it.
I have to say, I like your profile. You sound like a vivacious and caring person. The guy you chose to be with is going to be a lucky dude. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/24/2005 11:47:55 PM | | I don't have a problem with a handicap per say. But already caring for two children with disabilities would make me leary of anybody that required a lot of personal care or medical issues, I have enough to contend with already. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 8:39:47 AM |
This probably is the right place to complain but it is annoying to see all those empty handicpped spaces. I don;t think it would hurt the handicapped to wheel a few extra yards. It is good exercise. None of us get enough exercise. i've been seeing the doctor for bad nerves but they declined to provide me with a handicapped sticker which really really pissed me off.
Oi! I don't want to sidetrack this thread any more, so...
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts2544892.aspx | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 9:00:19 AM | Yes I would.... If I was mentally stimulated and attracted to the man.... his handicap wouldn't bother me.
There are plenty of men withought physical handicaps.... that um..... hmmm I better stop as I don't want to sound like a man hatter!!! :-) | |
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c7t1
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Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 10 | |
| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 9:39:19 AM |
This probably is the right place to complain but it is annoying to see all those empty handicpped spaces. I don;t think it would hurt the handicapped to wheel a few extra yards. It is good exercise. None of us get enough exercise. i've been seeing the doctor for bad nerves but they declined to provide me with a handicapped sticker which really really pissed me off.
burroughs try wheeling through snow and slush with your hands freezing from the wet and cold. Or the extra time it takes to get in and out of your vehicle. I have a van with a lift; I get wet enough in the time it takes to get in or out of it and I don't need to get any wetter wheeling the extra yards. Further try going those extra yards carrying your purchases. A lot of people with disabilities pride themselves on their independence and Handicapped parking is just on of the few thinks that make our lives a little easier.
Not to mention a few years ago I was hit by a car in a mall parking lot because the driver didn’t see me over the other parked cars. You have no Idea how many times I have circled the parking lot like a vulture looking for an empty spot. Not to mention the able bodies who arte just running in for a minute or so they say. Try living in a chair for a week and then come back and talk about handicap parking. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 10:15:27 AM | A very good question...
Yes I would, if it was THE person, and as one poster noted he is to shy to date someone with a physical defeciency...Handicapped is bias...most persons with handicaps detest that term intensley...I do as well...
People are People are People... it doesn't matter if they are in a wheelchair, walk with a limp are blind etc...It is all about who and what they are. No one's opinion matters but your own in any way shape or form...let em stare if your partner is what you want...Flip the people staring the bird and be done with it...
I tried to date a lady confined to a wheelchair...She was an absolute doll...but she wasn't over feeling sorry for herself..She thought I wanted to date her out of pity...Oh so wrong, she was a wonderful person..but hadn't reached the stage where her self confidence overpowered her self pity.
Next time you see a person male or female in a wheelchair ...realize how powerful they really are to sustain all the problems that we all take for granted... determined is an understatement..
NoNo | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 10:18:11 AM | Well, yes I have and did for many years. He has M.S. and it was not his actual disease that broke us up. He vented too often, too loudly and really only at me. I know it was because I was the one he could count on, but believe me, even with the patience of Jobe, it became too difficult to handle. He is still a good friend and I still make sure he is taken care of. It's just not me doing it.
I'd have to say though, having gone through years of hospital emergencies, illness too graphic to write about, not being able to get to many places, or having to cancel at last minute, my back that is still sore from the many times I had to pick him up, I don't think I'd do it again. I lost a lot of my life giving, and I'm really not resentful, I understand the gift is in the giving. I just feel like I've given enough and it's time for me. From my perspective, and only my perspective, some handicapped people become angry, bitter and resentful and I don't want to be in the path of that oncoming vehicle again. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 10:48:38 AM | physically or mentally?
i have a physically handicapped sister
i couldn't do it
i know what it entails and i couldn't
it takes a very special kind of person
and i am not that person.
perhaps that makes me terrible
but at least i can be honest with myself | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 11:12:28 AM | I think the only way I could decide was if I could reach the person behind the chair or the prosthesis, or look beyond the absence of a limb or specific ability, to the person within.
I am also not the type to feel an instant attraction to somebody. I know many good-looking people who do absolutely nothing for me, and many others who I may have initially dismissed as "date" material who turn out to be very attractive to me...once I get to know the whole person.
Someone mentioned that people with a disability are often bitter. I have worked with adults with disabilties for many years, and yes this can be true. However, I know many more able-bodied people who are just as bitter, with less reason. Then there are others who have worked to overcome insurmountable odds, and live happy, fulfilled lives.
BTW -- I had a professor who lost a limb as a young adult, and it was he who told me where the term "handicap" comes from. It stands for "cap-in-hand" from the days when people with a disability were thought to be useless, and couldn't find a job...so they were forced to stand with "cap-in-hand" and beg for handouts. It's no wonder it is a distasteful term. People still use it, but I'm sure out of ignorance of it's founding, and not malicious intent.
Thankfully, employment and equity laws now allow people to demonstrate Abilities. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 6:29:40 PM | | To get back to the thread subject and ignore the just way too stupid! yes i would date someone who has a disability, but I only think I would do so now that i have gotten a bit older and more mature. I think when we are younger we tend to be way more concerned about our "image" and not about what really is important in life. Now it's way more simple a person who is beautiful inside and out is just beautiful period! | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/25/2005 8:24:07 PM | Absolutely ....I did date a young woan , whe I was yoiung also,...who was one of the children in this country that recieved live polio imunization and subsequently developed polio ...she ended up with one leg useless and about three quarters as long as the other....Sure made it easy to catch her when......(please guys I kid ) .. she always cuaght me with fake "
do you see this"?" requests and begging for neck massages...If anything , it was Her dating somebody with a mental defiency...I really miss her... | |
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Phresh
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Joined: 7/28/2005
Msg: 19 | |
| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/26/2005 8:18:25 AM | | i know one of the coolest chicks ive met has been in a wheelchair because of a wreck she was in. i've argued with myself plenty of times because i'd like to date her but theres just something about it that i personally couldnt live with. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/26/2005 9:12:03 AM | | Sure, I have no problem dating some that has a physical disability. I had one girlfriend who was deaf and it was great because I got to learn how to communicate on a whole new level. It also gave me a new prespective on my life and the challenges she went through on a daily basis. | |
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Phresh
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Joined: 7/28/2005
Msg: 22 | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/26/2005 10:20:04 AM | I would date a man with a handicap.. as long as he is the type of person who is independent and doesn't lay at home lamenting something he can't change. And by independent I don't mean that he has to be living alone..fine if he lives with family but I would have a problem if he sees himself as limited by his limitations.. if that makes sense?
I sometimes have to walk with a cane due to a hip problem.. but I don't limit myself..heck I go dancing, walking, etc.. no problem.. | |
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| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/26/2005 11:08:54 AM | I actually wanted to date a girl I met when I was about 20 years old. I didn't actually get a chance to get to know her though. Long story ... short for.
I used to go to a roller rink locally and there was this girl that used to go there and she was hearing impaired. I didn't know it untill the third time I had seen her there and I tried to talk to her. At first I thought she was ignoring me because her back was to me when I tried to introduce myself. One of her friends noticed I was talking to her and came over to me afterwards and asked me if I knew her. I told her I was trying to introduce myself and I thought that he was very pretty and i wanted to get to know her. She told the girl and a little later on I saw the girl again and she looked mad at me and I never saw her again. I was told by someone that was with her she thinks the group of people I was with put me up to this as a joke. I never felt as terrible as that for the way she felt.
I would date a girl with a handicap as long as I had that chemistry. I felt it then even when I knew her disability.
Alonebuthappy , you are an absolute gorgeous woman and I would thing a guy should be lucky to have you with him. You exude a confidence not seen in many able bodied people and that is a quality to be prized. | |
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c7t1
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Joined: 9/17/2005
Msg: 25 | |
| would you date someone who is handicaped?
Posted: 11/26/2005 1:17:32 PM | Believe me I know dating some one with a disability has its challenges, but what relationship doesn’t. I could spend my time ****ing and complaining but what good would it do. I look at it this way I can be miserable and make those around me miserable or I can be happy and make those around me happy. I chose to be happy. I been in a wheelchair for 22 yrs. My daughter was 2 and my son 4 when I got hurt. I have traveled, played in sports for the disabled, went back to university got a degree, and like most over time got more than a few grey hairs. I have also brought my son to father son banquets, base ball banquets, and drove to Toronto at 1 A.M. when he needed me. I have seen every one of my daughter school play, moved her to college then home then back to college again. I have sat (wish I could say stood) in line at 4A.M. to get my daughter a cabbage patch doll for Christmas when they first came out. Come to think of it there isn’t much I haven’t done that most able body people do.
I guess sometimes I just wish ladies would treat me the same as the bank does; because when the bank wants it payment they could care less if I have a disability or not they just want their payment. Oh and another thing when we went to Universal studios in Florida we got into the rides first, didn’t have to wait in line lol.
As for the disabled people who are angry and resentful, well all that I can say is if you’re a @sshole you’re a @sshole and being disabled is no excuse. Just don’t paint us all with the same brush. | |
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