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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them! [Closed due to the cognatively challenged]
Posted: 11/27/2005 3:32:04 PM | Okay seriously.. every other time I look at this forum I see "why dont nice guys get the girl" ? or something related to that.
Look ... for all you guys who think you're so nice and caring. Let me inform you that half the time girls have been completely burnt by guys just like you who think they're all nice and then go and totally back stab us. We dont trust you. Plus, you're usually too damn shy. You dont show interest. It bores us.
Stop complaining!
If you're interested in a girl LET THEM KNOW!! And don't try this "Im super nice" crap! Just be upfont and say "we like you... wanna get coffee?"
See if that changes anything. | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 4:03:21 PM | Easy to say from the lofty position of being fmale (LOL!). What you say here pretty well sums it up in a nutshell:
"Plus, you're usually too damn shy. You dont show interest. It bores us. "
Yes, you heard it here for the first tiem folks... the women don't have to lift a finger, the guy has to do all the work, the guy has to put on the proper "masculine display", and then, if he's lucky enough, the girl will go through the trouble of gracing him with her presence!
Look- some guys are too insecure, definitely. Some guys are also ***holes (just like soem women are psycho bicthes!). But there's also a lot of good guys out there that have to work pretty hard for whatever female attention they can get, and meanwhile watch women, who frankly have nothing more to offer than he does, sit on their a$$es and do nothing to indicate interest in the guys (or even complain about how all the guys she's getting attention from are "losers"; some of them may be, but chances are she's ignoring a lot of decent guys simply because they aren't a combination of the nicest guy she ever dated, sexiest guy she ever dated, most adventurous guy she ever dated, most funny guy she ever dated, etc. all in one package!).
Bottom line girls: it's easy to **** about the guys who don't like the game -when you're the one setting the rules and ref'ing the game!!!
If it was women who had to meet men's standards, make all the first moves, provide all the excitment, and constantly feel like they're auditioning for the role of "girlfriend", I'm sure you women would have PLENTY to complain about! Of course you're all above doing anything to level the dating and mating game playing field, but sometimes gusy do need to let the truth be known. | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 4:20:39 PM | fightersbreath - You are correct in saying the shy guys do have to step up and let girls know how they feel. In addition, yes it can be bothersome to see the same post of guys asking why they haven't got the girl over and over....
However, Redviking that was I think quiet possibly the best response I've read on these forums. You really hit the bullseye on that one, pat yourself on the back, way to tell it how it is! | |
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Le Roi
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Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 7 | |
| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 4:39:32 PM | tellin a gal I'm interested doesn't work for me.......And that's only because I am a Conservative with Christian values. And if not that then it's cause I ain't good lookin enough for them.
I mean, would you get caught dating a guy that's bald, 5'2" and 154 pounds and is not a looker? I wouldn't even date me!! | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 5:00:34 PM | | I went out on 2 dates with a guy. He told me how genuine he was and how my life will change, how he would enhance my life. He pulled a no show for the 3rd date, haven't heard from him since. The only reason I went out him was because he was a "nice guy". u know try something different. The nice guys r the ones that r married happily. The ones that r bad boys to the public but down rite sweeties to their families. | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 5:46:54 PM | | I agree with this post. I am largely disgusted with members of my gender when I enter this broken hearts forum and see these posts too. If you were to quit whining and employ a different tactic, since the one you are using is a miserable failure, maybe there would be no cause to complain. Women like men that are self confident, secure, self sufficient and able to adapt. Perhaps the problem exists because most of the guys whining about the nice guy finishing last repeatedly demonstrate that they lack these qualities. Hell, their posts are mired with evidence that they do not possess traits that are important to most women. Is it any wonder they are not having any luck? | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 6:03:29 PM |
I agree with this post. I am largely disgusted with members of my gender when I enter this broken hearts forum and see these posts too. If you were to quit whining and employ a different tactic, since the one you are using is a miserable failure, maybe there would be no cause to complain. Women like men that are self confident, secure, self sufficient and able to adapt. Perhaps the problem exists because most of the guys whining about the nice guy finishing last repeatedly demonstrate that they lack these qualities. Hell, their posts are mired with evidence that they do not possess traits that are important to most women. Is it any wonder they are not having any luck?
Well CSU guy if you know women so well...why are you still here..looking for a date?
I have sent emails to women just telling them I found their profiles were done well and presented nicely..then I would add..you have a wonderful day...(just saying hello..not asking for a date or anything close to that)...
And out of the few I have sent..maybe 1 in 8 will reply with a thank you..
Now how hard is it to say thank you.... | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 6:19:40 PM | Hey Wats up Dudes, why argue with the girls, showing that men are weak, men are not weak their just tired of getting beat up, by the girls but there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Stand strong men, girls are just looking for men,that can complement their life and encourage them with their goals in life.
Take life with a hint of humor, lets make the girls enjoy and laugh a little. Start reading the girls profile they are alway looking for someone to make them laugh.
Ignore the nice guy in their profile they don't want that but be a great and funny guy. Be a real man.yeah the players are good for a one night stand but the real men. Will Stand Firm ! | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 6:30:25 PM | | Okay, for the guys who think that the whining men need to get over it and find a new way...GOOD FOR YOU...shows you have a brain and got this whole dating thing good to go...you couldn't be more right...For you men who think we are screwed and need to listen to how dam nice you are...get the frick over yourself. Every guy I have ever dated has been one of those 'I'm so dam nice' guys. Well here I am on plentyoffish...tell me, just how nice do you think they were. Guys who go on and on about how nice they are, are usually the most screwed up men you will find and they have to announce over and over how nice they are because they are trying to convince themselves while trying to convince us. | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 6:41:38 PM | CSU GUY, big mick, and 2hot4this, I love what you had to say and I suggest that all these nice guys read what you have posted.
As for Redviking, maybe you should read your post again and realize how much anger you are portraying, if that is suppose to show what a real man and a nice guy you are, it's no wonder you can't find a girl.
Let's face it people, there are a whole lot of psycho b*tches out there and just as many possessive psychotic men and in between hopefully there's a few good ones left. All anyone can do is sit back and hope that one day they are lucky enough to land a good one.
Sitting there thinking about how nice you are is only going to make you feel sorry for yourself, wasted energy that could be put towards positive thoughts. If you don't think positively you will not exude the vibrant ray women are looking for. And for that matter, the same goes for women. The thing I hear most from men is how beautiful my smile is and it is the one thing that leads them to beleive that I am well adjusted, happy, positive, caring and all the other good stuff. Look inside yourself, figure out who you really are and start showing it off to the world. Hold your head high, be proud of who you are, and smile dam it.... | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 8:13:51 PM | Funny how girls can say whatever they want and evrybody's like "oh the poor whiddle deary, look how she was wronged" but as soon as a guy calls "BULLSH*T" , people try to shame him for it. Actually, I think a "real man" is the someone who has the balls to call it like it is, not go with the flow because rockin' the boat might not be popular with the ladies... but that's just my opinion. I guess you can't be nice AND recognize a problem at the same time? I bet nobody'd compalin if I said " some guys rape woman and that's wrong and I'm mad as hell about it"- they'd probably say I'm a nice guy for caring about women like that. But if I say "lots of women act like tehy're all that when they're not, hold men to higher standards than they do themselves, have most of the power in dating, etc. - and that kind of sucks for us men" now I'm a "not nice angry guy who can't find a girl*." (FYI I CAN find girls, I just haven't found the right one yet; big difference)
Sorry, women these days are "equal" last I checked, so quit the "p*ssy power" trip and step up to the plate! Oh yeah, I forgot... women only want "equal" when it's something they don't already have... having to work harder or give something up in the name of "equal" isn't what they mean. So it's really "men and women are equal, but women are more equal." Got it.
Sorry, I've met plenty of women who couldn't carry on a conversation about anything bt themselves if their lives depended on it, or just bored me to tears talking about -nothng- for an hour, but they ditched me first for being too "dry" or not being "exciting enough" or whatever. Sorry babe, it's not just up to us guys to provide the fun, interest, excitment, romance, money, brains, blah blah blah- it's supposed to be a 50/50 thing.
I should add that it's not just a nice guy thing either- the cards are stacked in women's favor one way or the other. But if you're a guy who's not 6'6, beefcake, a "10" on looks, rich, into something "exciting" like bikes or flying helicopters or being an arrogant **stard... you have to work at it. I'm pretty sure the women realize this, and just keep things "status quo" because it's easier and gives them more control. And of course, they maintain status quo by shaming men (like me!) who don't play along by their rules.
Oh, and here's a smile for ya-
What was that about backlash now?! | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 8:16:50 PM | "Women like men that are self confident, secure, self sufficient and able to adapt."
True enough. But they seem only to respond to these qualities when a guy is a**** and arrogant braggart about it...
Better to date a confident ***hole than a confident decent guy, I guess... and just HOW confident are you if you ahve to be an ***hole about it anyway? | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 8:46:15 PM | After reading all your answers I have but one thing to say.
I never said women werent horrible beings. We're minipulative and miserable half the time. But if we have interest in you we show it. We do work as well. Not just you guys. So stop blaming us.. if ANYTHING. Both sexes are to blame. Im just sick of guys doing NOTHING complaining about why nothing happens in return. Karma in a way, ne? | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 9:32:30 PM | Well CSU guy if you know women so well...why are you still here..looking for a date?
Don't try and paint me as a pathetic fool that couldn't muster up a date if my life depended on it. I am here mainly for the forums, at this point. If I get a date here, that's cool too. But don't assume that this is my last resort or something. Don't assume that I don't still have ex-girlfriends on the hook in case times are hard. I got plenty of nuts for the winter, how about you? Unlike some people, I am not a social retard with the inability to go up and talk to females. Perhaps that attitude may have been excusable in the 6th grade, but it just doesn't fly these days. An adult should be comfortable enough with themselves and use to rejection by now. Who cares? Some girl doesn't want me, there are plenty of others that will have me. It's a matter of marketing really, hence one of the reasons I use the internet. What better way to target your key demographic in such large numbers? That's why I am here, I don't know about you. I didn't come to whine and complain that my e-mails for the day have dealt me a bad hand. I came to get the word out that I am on the market. Better get some quick, because I am selling like hotcakes. I do have a tendency to be a bit overcritical and thus I have not settled for anything less than I deserve. I guess you might call that pathetic, but I call that knowing exactly what I want and doing everything in my power to get it. That's the attitude of a winner. Perhaps you should aqcuaint yourself with it. It may do you some good. People here are always asking for advice wanting someone to blow smoke up their tail feathers. I am not that guy. I'll tell it to you like I know it, and not like I think you want to hear it. I tell these things to you because it might be of some benefit. | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 9:33:59 PM |
I have sent emails to women just telling them I found their profiles were done well and presented nicely..then I would add..you have a wonderful day...(just saying hello..not asking for a date or anything close to that)...
And out of the few I have sent..maybe 1 in 8 will reply with a thank you..
Now how hard is it to say thank you....
1 in 8? Those are good odds. What are you complaining about again? | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 9:42:58 PM | I agree, there are incredible ****es out there in the world. And there are ***holes in the world. And there are really nice guys in the world that after about a month or so of dating turn out to be the shy ***holes. yes. there is such a thing. They tell you then want you to be their gf and they're gonna make you their gf. And then they make dates with you, tell you they'll hang out with you tomorrow and that they'll call u tomorrow to say at what time because they miss you oh so much and then you don't hear from them for another 2 weeks.
so yes, dear audiance, there are even shy sweet guys that are ***holes too. This world is totally ****ed up. From both sexes. women and men.
And there are women who do make the first move. I do. I see a guy I might like, I go make the move. Because many times i will find the shy guys very cute and i know they'll be too shy to come up....so i'll go and talk to him. I've made awesome friends that way. :)
So there are girls that do make the first move. That do tell guys that "hey. i like you. there. i said it. now it's your choice of what to do".
But then again. Right now, i'm not looking. i do flirt though. *lol* | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 9:43:15 PM | | Short Note To Nice Guys: Stop being Nice ! ! ! Instead, Be Sweet & Kind, Put a picture up with a great big smile, Make them laugh & If something is not working in the beginning MOVE ON ! Point Blank ! .... The nicer you are to these ladies.....HOWEVER, Leaves more for ME !Now that was funny...I Don't care who you are...that right there was funny ! Git-er-done ! Have A Great Day .... I know I WILL ! | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 9:55:56 PM | | Again everybody has preferences..so don't get discourage if you are a nice guy and a women dos'nt appreciate it...find someone who will appreciate it they're are plenty of ladies out there that will. To the Op...people can write about whatever concerns them...next time you have a question concerning men...remember that | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 10:49:33 PM | CSU Guy I would cut and paste what I am responding to but it's too long. I couldn't agree with you more. I felt like it was me writing when I read what you had to say.
Redviking, you should hope you had the chance to read it. Yes you sound very angry and obviously not over whatever crappy things that have happened in your life. Never let the past interfere with your ability to have a happy future. Always Look Forward in life. I don't see why you can't the troubles in your writing. Everything you have to say about women in there is exactly why you're having problems with women. You have put all women into one category and if you think you haven't you should probably re-examine things. All you talk about is how awful women are and you say nothing positive. If you can't say anything positive, just how is it you think you will interest a women to take the time to see that you're a nice guy that deserves her attention long enough to get to know one another.
Get over it. How you feel you have been treated, the women can say the exact same thing in reverse. Both sexes can, most of us get that and have gotten over it which is why we can move on peacefully. You clearly can't.... | |
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| Will all the nice guys stop asking why we dont want them!
Posted: 11/27/2005 11:30:42 PM |
Don't try and paint me as a pathetic fool that couldn't muster up a date if my life depended on it.
I didn't say that you did...
And I agree with some issues redviking had.
The guys here who are telling other men to stop their whining ...If you were in a group with your buddies you would be saying something different.
As I tried to point out ..I am tired of the generalizations of people period...why do men do this, why do women do this?
Should I post men agree with womens posts because they think they will get more responses?
And another thing this is a forum..hint..and when asked an opinion...one will be given whether you like it or not...and if you don't like it...that someone disagrees with you...Oh well, as human beings we are born with minds to understand and rationalize, and when you classify(All the nice guys)...well that is a form of stereotyping.
Which could of just as easily been said..."Why do some nice guys..."
Just rememeber when you ask question..be prepared for an answer. | |
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