| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/23/2005 9:43:24 PM | Whats wrong with me??
I am 24 yrs old, I'm not to bad looking.. average I guess.. its not as if I think I look like a gremlin or anything... I have my moments when I dont think I look to hot or wished somethings looked a little different.. but every women goes through moments like those... so why have I never been on a real date in my life.. once I went out with a friend but he was my friend thats all so I dont consider it a date... in the last couple years I have become more outgoing and more self assured but still guys seem to keep there distance.. its as if i have a disease only they can see and are afraid of being infected if they approach.. my friends and family keep asking me why I'm still single.. "your a beautiful girl, a guy would be lucky to have you" but I have a feeling they are not seeing the same thing... I want to know why I cant seem to find a guy who is interested in dating.. not just a one night stand... having a guy was never a big deal for me but I always thought it would be nice to have someone to love and hold or be loved and held.. and just have someone to talk to when things got tough of when things went great... but I now feel like there maybe something wrong with me cause when I look around everyone even those most would make fun of, have someone and I am alone.. maybe its because I am not like the average girl.. i am not perky I dont bounce off the walls and flirt with every guy.. i am more of the down to earth person.. I sit and watch people and talk to those around me.. but mostly I am quiet and speak only when I have something to say... some say i am scary because I just sit there and am not loud or as talkative as everyone else.. others say i am easy to talk to but of course most of these people are women... am I putting out the wrong vibe or something????? | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/23/2005 10:03:03 PM | | hmm maybe you answered your own question by saying that your not easy to talk to. Perhaps your people watching and lack of speech make u seem unapproachable. I dont see anything physically wrong with your appearance you look like a beautiful woman so it has to be somewhat personality related at least in my opinion | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/23/2005 10:14:55 PM | I say just be who you are... No need to change for anyone... If men cant see what you have to offer, then why even bother with them you know? Men will be men when it comes to sex, so that shouldnt surprise you the least bit... The one for you is out there, just have to be patient, and in the meantime, enjoy yourself, rather it be hanging out with friends and being goofy or you doing something by yourself... Im also 24, and is in no rush to do anything... Were both still young and have all the time in the world...
Good luck to you in your search hon... | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 8:55:16 AM | | I thought only guys had this problem. You look pretty normal so it must be your personality. I suggest asking guys out instead of waiting for them to ask you. You have to create your own destiny, not leave it up to fate. Flirt more and ask guys out, the worst thing they can say is no and who cares its their lose anyways. It is much easier for girls to attract guys than vice versa. Just flirt more and ask guys out, I guarantee you will have success. Best wishes, Hill Valley Hick | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 12:34:21 PM | Nothing is wrong with you, I kind of have the same problem. Alought I have had had long term relationships, I can't seem to atract men to me. I think the trick is to love your self and be 100% happy with who you are, and then when you walk into the bar or wherever, they will pick up on that confindiece that you have.  Thats what I am trying to work on, myself 
Merry Christmas, Michelle | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 12:52:26 PM | | Nothing is wrong with you, everyone is special in their own way. Noone is ugly, or fat or thin or stupid or smart. Just be yourself and if anyone gives you a hard time sit back and smile and think owell its their loss. People are so hooked on looks and money and everything to me its kind of pathetic. Some men are wanting women with Busty and sexy bodies as well as women wanting this gq type of male ( NOT saying all so no flaming) . Onenight stands and f*** friends seem popular. Its not just looks its everyone , people just have a preferance. People just have had better chances in life doesnt make you less then them. Not everyone is made a supermodel or a high payed executive. Be yourself and screw what others think. Being alone is hard but just think oneday the right guy and girl will come. I hope you have a great xmas:) New year just be you:) | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 3:29:47 PM | | its not as if I am unapproachable.. I am friendly, when I am with my friends just hanging out of having a few beer.. we joke and laugh.. its not as if i looked pissed and wish to be left alone.. I dont have a ****y personality.. I am just reserved it was the way I was brought up.. I'm not load unless I have to be... it seems that the only guys who approach me have one thing on their mind. and even those are few and far between.. I am happy with myself and have surprised many an old friend of how out going I have become.. I do have fun and flirt from time to time but I know it isnt going anywhere cause.. well I dont know why I just do.. what really gets to me though is some people I know who have a bad personallity, I mean ****y and cruel.. are getting the attention.. not nessessarily because of their looks, but because of how they treat people.. i dont understand.. are nice girls no longer wanted by men??? | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 3:31:53 PM | | I didnt say I was not easy to talk to.. I just dont ramble on about nothing and look like an idiot doing so.. i speak when I have something to say or when someone is speaking to me.. | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 3:45:55 PM | | for whats its worth u dont or sound like a idiot everyone has a view who is nice or not ask santa:P huge hugs | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 5:14:58 PM | | lots of nice girls are wanted by men the problem is we dont have a little nice o meter to walk around trying to figure out who's who. Maybe some guys dont want to approach you while your in a group? it is slightly intimidating being put on the spot like that other then that i dont know what else i can say that might help | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/24/2005 6:52:09 PM | | I agree with Torkidon we don't have nice metres. Like i said before most men want the most attractive woman they can have its like a trophy. (not saying all men so no flaming) They see someone with extra pounds they smile and walk away then gossip with friends and laugh and when they see a skinny woman wearing a miniskirt and showing cleavage they are her like wild wolves. Women hate to say are quite the same (not all so no flaming once again) . They want someone who is hot , has a great paying job etc. If people went by whats inside and see how the person is then there wouldnt be a stand on nice guys or nice women finish last etc or forums of why am i not wanted. | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/28/2005 1:56:31 PM | 1st, stop posting pictures with your mother. Second, if you see someone that interests YOU, start a conversation. Most of the GOOD guys appreciate a little help breaking the ice.
Find some interests that gusy share like football, hockey, or politics. Nothing is more fun or easy to build upon then a genuine common interest instead of a need to be pursued. If you are a girl that a guy likes to talk to or share an interest with, there will be plenty of "real" dates. | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 1:44:26 PM | for one thing I dont see a problem with my pic.. secondly the only pics I have on my computer is from my brothers wedding and pub night with friends.. and those pics are not something that I want to post.. they are not very appropriate and the guys they would attract are not the ones I wish to speak to..so the pic I used is the only one that I though was decent..
Also I do have similar interest as some guys but that is all they see and it turns into a friendship then a relationship.. they see a women interested in sports (playing and watching)and they become buddy buddy.. so shared interestes is not a problem... | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 3:42:37 PM | Nothing wrong with you YellowEyes, damn you're not average, you're hot. Woohoo.
If you can get to Vancouver Island in the next couple hours, I'll take you on a real date. I'll even pay.. hahahaha
Seriously, though, there is *nothing* wrong with you. You just haven't met the right guy yet. He'll come along, you just have to be patient. It could be an age thing - the guys you've met haven't been ready to "settle down", so to speak. | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 4:22:42 PM | I remember a relative of a friend who I'll call Maria. Maria was a lovely woman in her twenties but to look at her she was so unapproachable! I'm sure she didn't realize that her expression and body language were broadcasting incredibly negative vibes.
I agree with the suggestion made here. Try making the approach and asking guys out yourself. If thats what you have to do to get what you want in life, then just do it. Yes it can be very difficult and even painful to be rejected - just ask any guy!
Once you get more experience you will then be able to pick and choose. | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 4:26:15 PM | Why wait for them to ask you out, why not ask them out yourself?
If I had a pretty gal like you approach me and ask me for a date I'd probably faint...then when I came to I'd say "YES!".
Just don't be traditional and have the guys ask you out. You never know, your Mr. Right may be too shy to ask you out himself! | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 4:52:23 PM | | Nothing wrong from my perspective except for the distance. I would love to date you myself if it wasn't for the distance. It could very well be the image you put out to people when you go out. Do you protray/dress provocatively? Maybe they way you interact with your friends in a care free way may indicate to others that you are a short term affair. The best I can offer though is to be patient, be and do the very best tht you can in life. The right MAN will come along and when you least expect it, sweep you off your feet. Happens all the time | |
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jimb77
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Joined: 8/30/2005
Msg: 19 | |
| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 5:06:01 PM | You are very analytical, you are over analyzing the situation. I am the same, stop doing that and relax. Join a gym, get a dog and walk it in the park, join some type of groups, get involved. You won't have any problems but don't settle for anyone. And 24 is very young, it will happen Those that ask why you are still single say it cause it is a common saying to say to young women but there is nothing wrong with being free at 24.
As for your looks, that definitely is not the problem, there is no problem. | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 5:06:58 PM | Not a darn thing.
But, learn to maximize your odds for meeting someone.
People watching and chillin' on the sideline is ok, but not if you really want to meet more prospective fellers.
I had the same tendencies, frankly it got me nowhere in any social situation.
You have to learn to smile, be a bit more approachable, keep up with current events so you have that handy bit of conversation ready to go.
If you're a people watcher then you'd have a good idea of how folks act, that will help in social situations.
Remember, it's about meeting your mate but the foundation for that is meeting new friends.
And don't sweat the small stuff, you got a little time, k?
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 6:04:54 PM | | hmmm nothing is wrong with you... I know you must hear that alot too..... but so do I... I either get my messages deleted or my IM ignored. and even at that I have taken the first step. me... never dated...never been really kissed, but until that time comes I can wait. The right kiss will come along and so will my prince. I desire to be held and just loved for who I am!!! so please be patient. I have. maybe some guys don't see the real thing anymore... | |
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| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 6:11:43 PM | I don't think think there is nothing wrong with your picture.....maybe you don't smile enough? If I guy looks your way, do you sorta give him a certain look you may not be aware of? Remember to make eye contact, keep it, and put an inviting smile on your face. I see girls at clubs or bars standing by themselves, and they are good looking, but no guy gives them attention..why? They look angry. You look at them, and they give you this bewildered look. So you just stay away!
Anyway, again, you're not unattractive, so that is not what the problem is.
Oh...as for the profile, I did an edit on it..I am NO EXPERT, but, changed it a bit so that it may attract more attention..(either that, or I am just a weirdo)
I'm a down to earth girl who loves to have fun and go out with friends or just stay in and chat. I am quiet but speaks when I have something to say. I love the outdoors and am making a career being out there in the elements. I love playing sports particularly baseball and rugby but will play anything and have fun doing so. I'm looking for a guy who can put up with me and my friends odd sence of humour, and who doesnt get scared away by strong women. I am quiet and reserved and not much of a flirt which scares people alittle but once you get to know me you will see that I am just easy going.
Ohh and just be clear I am the one in purple
Revised:
I am a down to earth who loves going out with my friends or staying inside to chat (over a drink??, watching TV??) just the same. I love the outdoors and I have a lot of fun playing sports, especially baseball. I have a great sense of humour, as do my friends, so I will never bore you. I have a great personality, I'm very easy going, but I can be quiet at times but also outspoken when need be.
not much of a flirt which scares people alittle <--- Okay, this is where we highlight your all so awesome quality---> I am a very loyal girlfriend when I am in a committed relationship.
Okay..I'm done with you..good luck.
PS. I am such a tard when it comes to spellng and grammar, so you will have to correct any mistakes if you wish to take my advice...if not, I will not be offended in the least..however, I will lay in bed a cry 3 and a half cups of tears do to the intense rejection. Hmm, well, at least I won't wake up at 4am in the morning needing to take a piss..so, please, do reject. | |
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dee693
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Joined: 10/8/2005
Msg: 24 | |
| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 6:35:12 PM | | I don't think there is anything wrong with you. You are who you are a lot of guys have a problem with approching pretty women they are scared you will say no to them | |
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Nithog
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Joined: 12/22/2004
Msg: 25 | |
| whats wrong with me?
Posted: 12/29/2005 6:35:32 PM | There is nothing wrong with you. There is something wrong with the whole dating scene in general.
"It's not easy being green" ~ Kermit the Frog.
I think everyone has felt as you do when you wrote this, I have. And if someone says they haven’t felt like that at some point, I think they are full of it. lol.
It will just take time, work, and a bit of luck. That's how I see it.
You'll find him.
5 billion people on this planet, how can you not find him!
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), so you have plenty of time to discover your inner diva and get yourself out there. If I wind up at this POF New Year's party I'll be sure to keep an eye out for you and we can discuss the woes of the dating world... I pretty much have the same problem you do: I bump into plenty of women who usually spout the same thing: "You're a great guy and good looking, I can't believe you're not taken". Then when I turn around and say "you want to go out?", their answer is "Sorry but you're not MY type" 
I guess I'm easy enough on the eyes to boink when somebody's bored, but am often too quiet in the presence of someone I truly like to maintain their interest.
