| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 3:20:49 PM | | i've only been hear a week or so and already have found under some profiles that they don't want a man with kids or baggage..... wouldn't that show you that some men are responsible and actaully admit they have a child!?! | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 3:30:48 PM | hannahsdad
Do you not repect the fact they are honest as you are?
As long as people are honest about what they are looking for that's fine.
It saves everyone time.
We can't go around getting offended by it.
It's just a preference.
It is great that you obviously love your daughter, and are honest about having one, which is wonderful, however, having "hannahsdad" as your dating name is a little much.
I think maybe you need to define youself by something besides your daughter.
Of course she is an important part of your life.
But when you make it your POF name it's saying you are already overly sensitive about it.
And maybe you are not ready until you can define yourself some other way.
And stop being angry at people who are looking for a different type of situation.
just a thought... | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 3:32:35 PM | Just like some guys don't like girls with kids, some girls don't like guys with kids ... just move on and go to the next profile ... not sure why everyone gets hung up on other's preferences ...
PS - just because a guy has a kid it doesn't necessarily mean the guy is responsible (i.e. my sister's ex-boyfriend and father of her kid is FAR FAR from responsible) | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 3:37:09 PM | | no no no, i wanted to actaully post this to get responses, i guess i struck a nerve with you. i can define myself by who i am and what i do and what my values are. i appreciate your thoughts, no hard feelings, just feelings. having my name as hannahsdad to allow women to look at the name and move on, my daughter is my life and i want women on line to know | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 3:51:19 PM | Why cant a woman choose to not date a man with kids. Maybe she recognises the potential problems associated with that and/or just wants to meet someone that when they have a child it will be a 1st child for both
That is her perogative afterall
I have kids and some guys wont date me bcause of that and that is their perogative | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:00:16 PM | hannahsdad....ignore the forum monopolizers...they obviously don't want anyone else to benefit from a little positive advice.
Furthermore.....every child has a father but the ones with custody are the good guys for sure!!!! | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:05:20 PM | I meant no harm.
It's hard to tell on here I know.
Just step outside yourself, now you're a woman on POF.
Great isn't it.
Now look down you have breasts, nice, but you won't be in this body long enough to understand or enjoy it. haa
Now you read 'hannahsdad' as a title.
I'll start of by telling you;
Perception is a whacked up thing and it varies from person to person and no one is ever wrong.
The best we can all do is be self aware of how we may be interpreted.
I'm just offering you one, with hopes you get more repsonses, as it seems this is what has you frustrated.
Ok where were we....
It's great you love your daughter, form the point of any womens view, single, with children without, etc.
Using my eyes, You read ; (hannahsdad),
I see maybe you are trying to prove something by using her name in your title, or maybe you still have an ongoing struggle to prove something in your life with how important you are in her life,(this isn't necessarily bad).
You are making a grand statement about her importance, it just may be overwhelming to someone who doesn't know you yet.
It's a statement of closeness and may also show you have little room for it.
Now, Can I have my body back?
Great, thanks :)
I dunno, I'm whacked, there never was a sane person who ever listened to me....
Best bet to ignore everything I say to be truthful. | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:06:51 PM |
Furthermore.....every child has a father but the ones with custody are the good guys for sure!!!!
This is also not always the case, not to diminsh hannahsdad
But not all the men who get custody are good. | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:14:02 PM | It's pretty funny because I actually find it the opposite...
I have chatted with some really great guys but for the most part the ones I have met in person haven't been married and have no kids.
It is also funny that I get the same line all the time..."I really love kids though..."
Do they really love other peoples kids???..sometimes it just seems a little forced.
I actually signed up on the site hoping to find some single dads with baggage...then we are both coming from the same place... aware and understanding of the responsibilities of being a parent. Outside of here I don't know any single dads (except my ex...lol).
It is also true that it is better for these girls to be upfront and honest about what they are looking for. That way you don't waste their time or your own!!!
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PA!GE®
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Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 14 | |
| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:16:42 PM |
a man can get custody for many reasons
Perhaps he is the better parent but maybe that is just the lesser of 2 evils
or
the judge is a woman hater
or yes maybe he truly is a good parent and she is a bad one
Sometimes a man has custody because she died.
The fact remains the OP doesnt have custody and simply procreating does not make one responsible
Disclaimer- I am not saying the Op is not responsible
And I still say men and women have a right to choose to date someoine without kids and that does not make them a bad person | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:21:02 PM | Signgirl - are you talikg about in my sister's case? good lord no! Are you talking about Hannahsdad? (I have no clue in his case)
I was just stating that just because a guy is a father it does not necessarily mean he is a responsible person ... in Hannahsdad's case I don't know ... he could be a good guy, or he may not be, I don't know him so I won't say either way, I also won't say that beacuse he said he has a daughter he is responsible, again because I don't know him I won't assume things ... is that more clear without being negative?  | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:25:25 PM | Gender and custody don't always make a good parent. A good parent is a good parent. I know both men and women who have custody and shouldn't; I also know both men and women who have custody and are absolutely wonderful parents.
That said, I have a tendency to pass by the profiles that have children or want children, simply because I know I don't want children, and I'm never sure if I can tolerate someone else's children. It completely depends on the child. (That's a subject I'm not going into here, but will discuss privately with anyone who wants more info.)
That doesn't mean I don't like men who have children, it means that I won't make the first contact. | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:39:07 PM | totally relate to people who choose not to have kids....lord knows when you have them, some days you can't understand why. lol
Steve...yes, I was wondering about your sister's ex.
I truly admire a man with the balls (who is a REAL parent) to raise a child on their own. | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/26/2005 4:44:57 PM | | i'm really glad actaully i posted this because if nothing else it openned conversation about people having kids and what the misconceptions are and what effect they have on dating. i guess the end all be all is that i chose my name because i wanted to be upfront with women and if they pass my profile because of it, well it's their loss not mine, good conversations ;) | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/27/2005 8:34:26 AM | | Hi there..this is my first time on the boards..just wanted to say im a single Dad of a great 10 year old boy.Ive raised him since he was 3 months old.Unfortunately at the time his mom was more concerned with partying than her son.So ive had him his whole life ..with no regrets.However i find that most, not all women dont want to be part of that situation.Its too bad really because ive been single for a bit in order to concentrate on my boy;and now im ready to start dating again and am finding it difficult.Reading some of these responses gives me new hope...so thank you :) | |
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PA!GE®
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Joined: 11/9/2005
Msg: 22 | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 12/27/2005 10:23:38 AM | | i've dated guys with kids...no biggie....my only requirement is that they are good fathers and put their children first...and no crazy jealous ex's...big pain in the ass :P But hey, if the guy is worth it, ya can put up with a lot. | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 1/1/2006 9:20:11 PM | I don't think hannahsdad's name sounds like anything other than a guy with a child named hannah
Perhaps because I have a daughter that I don't find it odd.
I definately agree that having custody doesn't mean being the better parent. | |
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| women don't like men with kids...... is this true???
Posted: 1/2/2006 12:09:26 PM | I know what you are saying. I am just naive....wish the system made the decisions for the right reasons.
I have a very close friend who does not have "custody" (for all the term is worth??) and he is definitley the best choice for a full time parent. He has his daughter most of the time and surely has more impact on raising the child.
I just love the REAL dads and their sincerity. | |
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