| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 5:45:49 AM | So many times we hear women and men, although mostly women, say they were used for sex. The only conclusion I can draw is that the woman doesn't like sex. Here's my thinking.
If a man takes a woman out for dinner and doesn't call her the next day or dumps her we never hear the woman say, "He used me for dinner." Or if the man takes the woman to a movie and doesn't continue the relationship the woman doesn't say, "He used me for a movie."
Being used is usually when one does something for a friend that they wouldn't normally like doing. For example, we say a friend just uses us if they ask us to do something for them that is not enjoyable. "She just flirted with me so I'd help her move." or "He just pretended to like me so I'd give him a ride to work every day." One person is getting something they like and the other person is not benefitting.
When it comes to sex and a woman says she was used does that mean she never enjoyed the sex? Does that mean she never, ever enjoys sex? If she enjoyed the sex why would she say she was used? | |
|
7times
|
Joined: 10/27/2005
Msg: 2 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 5:49:23 AM | I do have to say that I've heard woman complain about dinner.. the cheap **stard took me to a fast food place or he refused to pay and such.
as for the whole other part about being used for sex, there is no such thing.. Its something people say to try and make a decision they made on their own credible to them and nothing else. | |
|
marol
|
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 3 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:01:34 AM | | 7times is tootan his own horn about sex here i think but the basterd is also admitting to taking women to fast food joints and doesn't even pay at times..maybe even 7times?..lol | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:02:02 AM | This really needs explaining?
I'll try my best, even though I'm a "woman".
I wouldn't have sex if I didn't want to have sex. If I have sex with someone and I never hear from them again, what am I to determine?
A.) Said sex was apparently not even memorable.
B.) Said sex MAY have been good enough for "the moment", but no need for another moment.
C.) Said sex was mind blowing, d i c k throbbing, loin exploding spectacular, exquisite sex! So much so, my poor body can't bear to have it with you again...
??????
That's one side of the coin. The other is when you do hear from them again. In that case, if you do the deed a second (or more) times, you can't even begin to feel "used", any more than you yourself are "using".
I tried. | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:04:59 AM | Again, I find myself asking exactly what century this is >? I get so confused at times~  | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:19:23 AM | good analogy but I don't think women say "used for sex" because they don't like it.
But if a man took a woman out to dinner
they went home and had sex
It was great
He never called again
What would you call that? | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:19:45 AM | Again, I find myself asking exactly what century this is >? I get so confused at times
****************
When you figure that one out,Livewire,please let me know too. | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:23:51 AM | No woman has done such a thing to a man, I'm sure~~~You're crackin me up taurus~~ | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:23:58 AM | One way to not get "used" for sex.. is to not have sex till your damn good and ready..
usually the guy dumps me before that happens.. cause he's can't stand the wait.. oh well.. at least I wasn't used for sex right..  | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:24:17 AM | a lot ...not all..but a lot of women tie their emotions to having sex .....and some men (not all) realise this and will tell a woman anything they want to hear to get them to sleep with them including the dreaded "L" word. So when that happens and then the woman never hears from the man again....thats when the woman will say ..she was used for sex.
Now this could happen with a man too but its not as common because of the whole women and investing emotions thing. | |
|
7times
|
Joined: 10/27/2005
Msg: 11 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:25:21 AM | @marol... I also use coupons.
ot...
no matter how you word it or try to ask, it all still boils down to the fact you agreed to have sex | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:29:39 AM | Then there are men who get used for love so to speak.The woman gets the guy's interest,he dates her a few times, he starts to have feelings for her,he never even gets the sex and then she dumps him because at the time she didn't really know what she wanted.
The woman figures she has done no wrong because they never slept together. | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:34:34 AM | Hmmmmm....
Now I have to say I understand where you are comming form to some point but in my annology of the way Human nature gose I think sex is a rittural for mating and insticts for the animal side that no on wants to admit to.
He needs it you need as a female but soc. has schooled woman to say no and men to be preditors so that our spices continues ...
Best yet I can exsplain.... | |
|
marol
|
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 14 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:41:21 AM | coupons are great....if indeed you do use them.....cough..lol
women more so than men internalize sex, as mentioned | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:41:28 AM | I want some of those coupons 7~~ 
I think society has just sexually "respressed" most women. There's a lot they may have to say and want to do, but are taught it's not "acceptable"....
Gotta take a walk on the wild side once in a while, or where's the excitement and fun in life>?
I guess I'll never be June Cleaver ((which of course, was my parents greatest dream)) | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:42:06 AM | | Maybe the the guys dump you because....THEY TIRED OF WAITING!!!....I speak for all men when I say THANKS FOR NOTHING | |
|
marol
|
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 17 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:45:54 AM | | and women reply........it probally would of been | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 6:53:47 AM | as a french guy, all of this thread seems to me very strange - almost like hearing conversations between aliens... seems to be special with US society, or what ? I have never heard a french woman saying she has been used for sex...
- but saying how poor lover was the guy, yes !!! (not speeking for me,  - but you may consider that i'm a liar, this, you can only check by yourself  )
- or complaining that he never called back, what a shalme, he was so a great lover ! (not speeking for me too, i only hope this is just because she would have never told me that in front of me ) | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:02:22 AM | Rhino,I've often said Europeans have a more sensible attitude about sex than Americans.I think it's because Americans tend to attach a monetary or material value on EVERYTHING.The attitude about never getting it for free is typically American.The whole business of dating,courting,marriage and the breakups all support peripheral businesses that thrive on this absurd cycle.Is it any wonder western women,particularly Americans attach the value system to the sex drive.A woman who sleeps with a man is said to have "given herself to him" as if somehow her t wat was the center of her soul.
So the man who tagged and ran is seen to have gotten away with a terrible deed.He got the sex without having to sacrifice anything.Something considered anathema in American society,having the audacity to get something without sacrificing something,i.e,money,time, commitment.
It's business any way you look at it. | |
|
kmhstx
|
Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 20 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:03:21 AM | | I would feel used for sex if I was wined and dined, and dated a guy for alittle while, waiting to get to know him, start to have feelings for him, he says he has feelings for me..and then we finally have sex..and enjoy it..then he dissappears off the face of the planet...if that happened I would feel used for sex. He got what he worked for and then bye bye... | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:04:53 AM | I think society has just sexually "respressed" most women.
Your ABSOLUTELY RIGHT! Society has sexually repressed us
A lot of women.. not only feel that they cannot "have" sex.. but they also feel that they cannot say "no" and many men think they are entittled to it simply because they take the woman out to dinner..
Sexual repression has damaged our society.. The US prides itself on being a sexually "Free" society..lets face it.. we are free to have sex.. but told we shouldn't .. then told we shouldn't say no.. then called whores if we do.. and fridged if we don't.. | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:05:20 AM | Never been used...I was disappointed once..yuck phewy ewww | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:06:19 AM | | I've dated several Hispanic men ((please, no offense to any Hispanic people on this forum)), and they seem to have this "Madonna" thing going on. It seems that once you have their children they view you as the mother of their children, and many of them ((no, not all of them)), take a mistress/lover. It's just a certain mindset, I imagine >? I was dating a guy many years ago who actually took me to meet his family for a BBQ.. I eventually found out he was married and had a 12 yo daughter, yet he took me to meet his family and they thought nothing of it~~ I got out of that one real quick, didn't want any part of it~~ | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:08:25 AM | | hmmm, did they ever call you mamasita? | |
|
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/11/2006 7:09:19 AM | He got what he worked for and then bye bye...
***************
This just proves my point.Notice the wording here,"He got what he WORKED for"..He went to all of the trouble of pretending to want a relationship,no small task too.He had to wine,dine and play the ridiculous game,never intending to reap the real reward.It's like buying a 747 to get free peanuts.
Only in America or any other place where western value systems are so linked with reward/payoff schemes,would such a charade exist and thrive. | |
|
Home
login 
