|
|
|
|
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 5:54:57 PM | BIGTIME GENERALIZATION...but hey....feel free to comment, add, debate, etc etc etc... on any of these.
From "AskMen" Mags' Andrea Madison.
Have you ever wondered if the way you act makes women cringe? Have you ever worried that your behavior might be making them run in the other direction?
Just as women are attracted to certain archetypal men, there are other types of men that women go out of their way to avoid. And this is especially true during the early stages of a relationship, when a woman is trying to gauge a man's personality. Below are eight types of guys that women consistently stay away from. I have compiled this list from conversations I've had with numerous women regarding the behaviors they dislike in men. But don't worry if you recognize some of the following traits in yourself -- most of them aren't deal-breakers. The idea here is not to change your personality, but rather to keep certain female-unfriendly behaviors in check. Read on to find out what women dislike, so you'll be able to make a better impression next time around.
1. THE NEEDY GUY
He is overly emotional and shares all his feelings with her right away. The Needy Guy also doubts himself and needs constant reassurance about his relationship, work and friendships.
Why he is so unappealing. Most women look for a strong partner they can lean on. So if you are always leaning on her -- especially in the early stages of a relationship -- she might doubt your ability to do this. And since women tend to come into relationships with all sorts of insecurities, she won't want to deal with yours as well as her own.
What to do if you're that guy: Timing is everything, so you just need to keep your feelings in check at the beginning of the relationship. Try to hold off on sharing all your feelings or divulging your insecurities. Once you are far enough along in the relationship, you can share as much as you want. By that point, she'll appreciate knowing what's on your mind.
2.THER PREDICTABLE GUY
Women don't like the Predictable Guy because they know exactly how he'll react to everything. He follows formulas and never wants to do anything differently. For example, he'd never surprise a woman by spontaneously taking her out for the night.
Why he is so unappealing: Women look for a certain amount of unpredictability in a man -- they want a free spirit. This is why some women seem to be drawn to the notorious "bad boy." It's not that they are drawn to his badness exactly, but rather to his unpredictability.
What to do if you're that guy: You don't have to be "bad" or a completely free spirit to win her over. But try to mix things up -- particularly at the beginning of a relationship. Call her and tell her you want to go to the countryside for the day, or for an impromptu meal. After she gets to know you, she won't mind as much if you slip back into your routine a bit. But don't forget to continue to surprise her once in a while -- doing so will keep the relationship fresh.
3.THE ARROGANT GUY
He has a huge ego and he's condescending. He is also rude -- not necessarily to her, but to anyone he perceives as beneath him. And that's just as bad as being rude directly to her.
Why he is so unappealing: A woman often looks at how a man treats other people to assess his personality. So even though you might be nice to her on a date, she'll be paying attention to how you act with other people too.
What to do if you're that guy: No woman wants to be talked down to, so I shouldn't have to tell you to shed the ego when you are dealing with her directly. But in order to really impress her, you need to treat everyone around you with a certain amount of respect -- because she'll be watching.
4.THE BOORISH GUY
The Boorish Guy doesn't try to hide the fact that he's checking out other women while in her presence; he flirts with the waitress and he even goes as far as to brag about his past conquests. Overall, he lacks respect for women.
Why he is so unappealing: Not only is this type of behavior infuriating, it can also be bad for a woman's self-esteem. If you act like this when you are first getting to know a woman, you won't stand a chance.
What to do if you're that guy: If you can't curb this kind of behavior permanently, then you at least have to keep it in check when making a first impression. Keep your flirting and wandering eyes at bay -- and maybe eventually it'll become a habit. Because, truthfully, if you introduce this kind of behavior into a relationship at any point, she won't be pleased.
5.THE CHEAP GUY
He invites a woman to dinner and then subtly suggests they go Dutch. He never splurges to buy her flowers and he always opts for the cheapest wine. He makes her feel like they're on a tight budget from the very first date.
Why he is so unappealing: Your first few dates should always be carefree; the words "saving" and "budget" shouldn't come up. If she spends the first date picturing a lifetime of penny-pinching with you, you're out of luck.
What to do if you're that guy: Loosen up the purse strings a little when you're courting a woman. You don't need to spend a fortune to make a good impression, but you do need to make her feel like she's special. Flowers are a nice touch once in a while.
Don't argue all the time, act holier-than-thou or talk trash about women if you want a second date
6.THE ARGUER
This type of guy turns every conversation into an argument. When he takes a woman out, he makes her feel like she's in debate class rather than on a date. And in doing so, he makes her feel defensive and self-conscious.
Why he is so unappealing: A date should be a pleasant experience, but if she's on the defensive the whole time, she will not be enjoying herself. Remember this: Constant arguing and debating is a stress -- and you certainly don't want her to associate you with a stressful experience.
What to do if you're that guy: Most importantly, relax. If you are this type of guy, you probably revert to debating because you are nervous or unsure of what to say. So before the date, brainstorm conversation topics and questions you can ask her. That way, you won't be as likely to revert to arguing during lulls in the conversation.
7.THE SELF RIGHTEOUS GUY
This guy is very judgmental of others. He probably doesn't drink or smoke, and he doesn't hesitate to tell others to follow suit. From the very first date, he'll preach to a woman, telling her she shouldn't drink wine or get dessert.
Why he is so unappealing: No one wants to be judged, especially on a date. She'll just find it annoying and rude.
What to do if you're that guy: You can preach a little once you are actually in a relationship. But until that point, her drinking, smoking and dessert-eating habits are none of your business.
8. THE MISOGYNIST
This guy makes no secret of his bitterness toward women. On a date, he can't help but exude negativity toward his companion and the entire female gender by making rude and insulting comments.
Why he is so unappealing: This is the only type of behavior on this list that is, in fact, a total deal-breaker. And it's not surprising. What woman do you know that would like to be in a relationship with a man like this?
What to do if you're that guy: You need to reconsider your attitude if you are this type of guy. This type of behavior is not only rude and nasty, it is often the last straw in breaking up a relationship.
BE THE AMAZING GUY
Don't stress out too much if you see yourself on the list above. But do remember this: These are behaviors that women look out for at the beginning of a relationship. So if you want to put your best foot forward and make a good impression, study the list and make sure to keep these female-unfriendly behaviors to a minimum
 IN other words....we're all f*cked.
Comments? | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 6:00:41 PM |  I love this topic... I'll have to comment in a bit. I saw this one too late. Oh well... Off to work. | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 6:01:42 PM | | I plan on being all of these things once she says " I do". lmao...as if. Funny because I think alot of guys already know this stuff but aren't self-critical enough to acknowledge and fix the problems. Maybe I'm wrong of course but one thing for sure is that I am conscious of these behavioural traits in myself and make just as conscious and effort to avoid them all the time. Except on the forums. It's just different here. lol | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 6:44:13 PM | | I'm pretty sure I've dated each and every one of these guys at some point in my life. And I'm still single. Hmmm ... maybe it wasn't me after all ... | |
|
| |
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 6:56:44 PM | I disagree - most of the women I have met never get as far as the depth mentioned above.
From the start most judge a man by his appearance - and even if they are warned he is a
'blue jeans' kinda guy, they still expect a him in a 3 piece suit.
Moving right along, they then stereotype him based upon prior experiences - so frequently,
a guy like myself with a full beard and moustache gets blown off because women seem to
think guys with facial hair MUST be 'dirty bikers' - despite the fact that some (like myself)
actually have cleaner homes and better hygiene than a great many women !
From there, if I haven't been shot all the way down quite yet - most seem to really work at
divining a man's wallet content/bank account/ etc. - once again, many mistakes are made
if a man is self employed - it is assumed he is a freeloader if he doesn't brag of his vast
holdings and retirement.
To sum up:
In the years I have done this, most women SAY they want to be loved and cherished, BUT
what that seems to translate to is that they want a guy with MONEY, a BIG job, fancy
STUFF, a brand new car, and plenty of extra $$$ to take them on world travels.
A guy that admits that he is mostly a homebody who is happy to do the cooking, cleaning
and buy the groceries is way too BORING for these gals - even if he is willing to get home
first and have the dinner started or waiting....
And....I will reply to the inevitable accusation here as well:
No, I am not bitter, merely very, very disappointed.
I seriously doubt there are many women left who sincerely want a GOOD man anymore.
Best Wishes to All !
mark* | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:28:09 PM | Small Hagrid ... you are sooooooo far off the mark ... it's scarey!!!
You say you aren't bitter ... but you certainly come across that way.
Most of us LOVE a man in blue jeans ... have no problem with facial hair (as long as it's clean and neat) ... have NEVER depended on a man's bank account and would expect to pay our own way on the world travels we would like to share with our partners. If a man is happy to do the cooking, cleaning and grocery shopping with me ... I say "marry me".
We all get disappointed and even discouraged sometimes. By the statements you make ... you are definitely NOT ready for a GOOD woman ... because I don't think you would recognize one if she bit you in a$$. | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:28:12 PM | Both viewpoints (smallhagrid and frrosty) give us, will at least me, food for thought.
I suggest keep looking. Your ideal special someone is out there somewhere in the world of pof. Goodluck and happy searching.
 | |
|
| |
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:37:32 PM | smallhagrid, great points you make. But I disagree; I AM looking for a good man. Don't mind a homebody; that doesn't mean he comes home, expects dinner and then falls asleep- with his hands down his pants. Don't mind if he wears jeans: I actually love jeans on a guy, but occasionally a suit is needed, just like I have to wear a dress to some events (shit happens). I have never looked for a guy that makes the big bucks, however, I am not going to support a man. My salary and his should make us both comfortable and able to enjoy the simple pleasures in life without going broke. I'm willing to go "dutch" if we have to--remember I want this man in my life as much as he wants to be in mine---why should he always foot the bill--I work too?
So in response to your disappointment, YES, there are women who are looking for good men. I will not, however, ever compromise feeling loved and cherished, because that's what I want to offer my man in return. And NOPE, I'm not a dreamer. I realize I may be alone for a long time, but I'm willing to miserable alone than be miserable with someone that isn't good to me and with me. For both of our sakes, I hope we find them.  Michelle | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:43:03 PM | Hmmmm. . . interesting article. I'm sure that there's a 8 types of girls men avoid list. I'd love to see that list hoping I wouldn't be on it. I have dated these guys but they usually have redeeming qualities that outweigh this generalization. These are like first date turnoffs. Hey, nobody's perfect and we all need a little work.
I think I would avoid someone with the attitude of hagrid more than any guy on that list.  | |
|
| Funny.
Posted: 2/10/2006 7:55:32 PM | I once watched the movie 'How to lose a guy in 10 days' .
( http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0251127/ ) and it was a horribly enlightening experience for
me - I realized I had seen ALL the behaviours this woman was deliberately inflicting on this
guy - very creepy !
Having always been known as a 'nice guy', it amuses me no end that when I honestly share
my experiences I get flamed and told I have an 'attitude'.
The word for women haters is misogynist (sp?), but I truly don't know the female equivalent
of that word for man haters, and I can tell you I have met them in numbers !
How many times I have been told by women that they think I am a very nice guy and they
wish me well in meeting a nice gal - but it isn't them - they like the barroom brawlers and the
smelly guys that don't bathe - and it's true - scary, but true !
Anyways, thanks for all the replies to my thoughts in this thread - for your further pleasure,
I have posted an honest account of my last several years at:
http://forums.plentyoffish.com/datingPosts3296355.aspx
Do feel free to critique me freely, please !!
Best Wishes to All !
mark* | |
|
| |
| Funny.
Posted: 2/10/2006 8:20:17 PM |
they like the barroom brawlers and the smelly guys that don't bathe - and it's true - scary, but true!
Wow, where do you meet these women??
I think all us women on here have it wrong in our profiles then. Perhaps we need to change it to "looking for smelly guys that don't bathe"
 | |
|
| thanks for the great thoughts !
Posted: 2/10/2006 9:08:16 PM | Auntie - it is interesting to me how folks respond to words alone with their own feelings.
It is difficult to be open and truthful and to NOT have it sound bitter to others.
(I have had women coworkers and buddies say to me: 'And you even LOOK at women
after what you've been through ?')
If anything I am a bit too clean and neat, and I do the things I said, and even more,
and yet I remain single - as I posted before, there was a woman who suggested marriage,
but she dumped me after telling me how perfect I was....strange, but true.
As far as 'readiness' is concerned - I believe both people must be similarly ready, and there
are many less prepared than myself who are also deeply involved....
Alleycat01 and Irishmish thank you for your kind thoughts.
Puppyluv123 - I will just say that people of all types are everywhere - and I have been
on dates with women that had no further interest in my company, but upon further
communication at later times confirmed that they had met a 'great guy' (yes, some of
us guys like to stay friends with as many folks as possible...) and some even marry.
I've met these guys later on - and they vary from simple harmless drunks to really
scary abusers - and the women seem to know they only like the 'bad boys' !
Go figure.
Best Wishes !
mark* | |
|
| |
| thanks for the great thoughts !
Posted: 2/10/2006 10:09:09 PM | Small Hagrid ... I don't doubt that you've had your share of bad experiences in relationships. Haven't we all!! I haven't read your mini biography of the last 7 years of your life (cause I don't particularly think the forums are a good avenue for self promotion).
But when you depict women as gold diggers searching for well-dressed, clean shaven, abusers, you can't help but sound a little ... bitter. And, the fact that you've written a mini biography, posted it and invited everyone to read it, sounds a little self-absorbed to me. I'm sure it was a very cathartic exercise for you. It's the inviting everyone to read it that I don't understand. If you're looking for sympathy, I'm sure you will find it. But since I'm just a woman ... and by your estimation, money-grabbing, shallow and pathetic ... I guess I can't spare any.
I'm sorry you've had a bad past ... time to pull up your boot straps and move on. | |
|
| thanks for the great thoughts !
Posted: 2/10/2006 10:35:43 PM | Auntie,
To the best of my knowledge, forums are here for sharing and exchange.
My posts are here for those purposes - you'd be very surprised if you saw
how I live my life - and catharsis is not needed, because I don't keep my
life a secret; though I know many, many folks who do this as a rule.
I posted my thoughts, got a few ascerbic as well as kind responses, posted
more info, and so on - this is how ideas happen, as simple as that.
What surprises me is how dating/mating for homo sapiens is treated as such
a taboo subject for discussion - so mysterious and so avoided - wow, could
it be true that our species actually also mates like the 'lower' creatures ?
Oh dear.
By comparison - just for example - though they are 'lower', neither horses,
nor dolphins wage war upon their own species - and neither do they play
funny games to hide their needs of companionship as people seem to.
In the other thread you referred to, which contains some of my last -3-
years experiences, there is also a sort of debate with another woman who
has decided that since I am male, I must be bad by default, and no matter
what I could ever say, I am always going to be the bad guy - I would put
forth a suggestion to you here - I suggest you may be projecting your
strong dislike of men upon me, and therefore concluding by default that
I must hate ALL women - when nothing could be further from the truth.
Now-
If you don't hate men, then perhaps you may take some few minutes of
your valuable time and actually read that entire thread, and perhaps then
also vent some more of your caustic thoughts, if you must, just as harmlessly
as you did in this thread.
Best Wishes,
mark | |
|
| |
| thanks for the great thoughts !
Posted: 2/10/2006 11:36:43 PM | I've dated a few men of those sorts, lucky they weren't ever all in the one fella ha
Personally, I avoid the arguing self righteous people like the plague | |
|
| You've truly made my night, and I thank you !
Posted: 2/11/2006 1:15:23 AM | I humbly beg forgiveness from the dieties of cross posting, but I do wish to
place this text here, thereby giving this delightful person not one, but TWO
entire places to debate whther they are the argue-er or the argue-ee......
From the post I started:
" "self righteous arguing sorts"
Hmmmm.....if I understand what you mean by what you wrote, you are trying
to get across that anyone who disagrees with you is, by the direction of your
pointed finger, and 'arguing sort', right ?
Interesting.
I distinctly remember being told over and over again by supposedly older and
wiser folks that it is an important feature of maturity to be able to disagree
peacefully - to agree to disagree as it were.
Now these many folks could have been wrong all along, I grant you.
Further, I vehemently disagree with your smoking (unless you light yourself
on fire for some reason I'll never understand...), but at the same time I do
honor your right as a free willed being to smoke and even to kill yourself in
any manner you choose - but NOT to if you are making the air others breathe
unfit as well - that is NOT ok.
As for the self-righteous label, if my admitted stance on smoking qualifies as
self-righteous, then I stand guilty, guilty, guilty as accused, and PROUD OF IT !!
Be Well, and Happy !
mark " | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/11/2006 7:43:05 AM | i'll be the first to poke holes in this "8 personality" theory by pointing out an internal inconsistency. It notes multiple times how women love "bad guys" and implying "good guys finish last" and completely ignoring the fact that misogynistic behavior actually seduces more women than they like to admit. ALOT more.
Of course, it's a pretty shallow lifestyle being a player. Though i assume casanova had no problems with his conscience.
Instead of making wild assumptions (like i've just been doing) based on hearsay, let me ask a personal question: Do women depend on men for emotional support? I'd always assumed it to be the opposite, for aren't men the one's who're supposed to be good at being "intellectual"?
sorry for sounding naive, but aren't emotions 'irrational'? (ie. "intuitive" "mysterious") and aren't women supposedly mistresses of this field?
Now, if one believes men and women feel and think alike i'd like to point out a pasture of manure that needs tending. | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/11/2006 7:49:55 AM | 
We have liftoff!!
hhmm; you make some VERY intelligent and VERY interesting points sir.
(I may try to answer later on if nobody gets on this and gets things rolling)
In short; I can see myself agreeing with you on most accounts and being able to argue one point rather easily.
Awesome dude;  thanks for shaking up my boat a bit!!
Depending on the mood of some of the girls in here....you may just want to put a helmet on for good measure bro. | |
|
| 8 Types Of Guys Women Avoid
Posted: 2/11/2006 8:05:19 AM | This is a Great List...my critique...
1. THE NEEDY GUY - yup, no girl wants to be a mans mother
2.THE PREDICTABLE GUY - yup. women like variety and surprizes
3.THE ARROGANT GUY - no so sure on this one, I think girls like extreme confidence bordering on arrogance
4.THE BOORISH GUY - the occasional sexual enuendo is productive but clearly boorishness is a turnoff
5.THE CHEAP GUY - oh yea, girls like cash, a lot. Wish I had more!! Better suit + better car + better vacations = better girls
6.THE ARGUER - this is the opposite of the THE AGREEABLE GUY (see below) - Nobody, not man nor women wants someone who will always agree with them just to argree. We all want someone to compliment us and make us better.
7.THE SELF RIGHTEOUS GUY - similar to above, girls like a bit of debate and challenge. They do not want someone who is overly accomodating
8. THE MISOGYNIST - yep, wouldn't want to date a girl who hates men either
I'd add -
9. THE AGREEABLE / ACCOMODATING NICE GUY - The victim of "the nice guy, but..." label - no spark, no excitment. It's a delicate line projecting the exciting, unpredictable and "edgy" part of your personality so that girls are intrigued / interested. Be too honest, predictable, stable, accomodating and you are labelled boring and eliminated before you get to the plate | |
|
| |
|
|
Home
login 
hiya lil pup 
We're talkin about boys the girls don't like. 
