mytoy
| | Joined: 11/14/2004
Msg: 1 | |
| | can men accept someone with bipolar?Page 1 of 5 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5) | | i have bipolar and not many people understand that. i know this makes realtionships difficult. i want to be happy and sometimes i am but then somethimes not. any advise? | |
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DKD15
| | Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 2 | |
| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 2/14/2006 2:36:14 PM | | Not much you can really do, i mean it not like you woke up one morning and thought "hey i want to have bipolar" if someone cant accept you for who you are then screw em. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 2/15/2006 9:48:24 AM | | You'll have the most luck from soneone who either has had some form of depression in the past, or who has known someone who has. The less explaining you have to do, the easier it will be to get used to someone. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 2/24/2006 5:43:03 AM | Mytoy,
I read your question and wondered, does she take medication and take it on schedule and without a miss. If so, is it working for you now? Not yesterday or the day before, but today, as today is the day that counts. When your in a relationship, do you trust your partner to advise you that perhaps your medication may need to be revised? Mytoy, if you do these things and work at trying to manage you life, many a partner would not have a problem with your condition. I feel your method of management is the key here, passive or aggressive. Aggressive management is the only way, and with that, you can find a partner that truely loves you and will help you when needed. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 2/25/2006 7:26:51 PM | mytoy~~
i went thru almost 4-5 yrs being told i was bipolar----
i ook all kinds of *drug****ails* u name it..ive been on it....
come to find out---i have P.M.D.D..... kinda the same---kinda diff----i hope uve gotten more than 2 dr's opinions...
if it is bipolar for sure---stay on ur meds..ya they do suck---sometimes u feel like a zombie--sometimes...u wanna crawl into a ball and drop off the face of the world----
but if a guy really cares bout u---hes in it for u---the long run....regardless of ur condition...
--------would u not date or be w/ a guy...if he had a few lil probs??......
email me--for more info---- gilr i got some stories for u--im tellin ya!!
good luck
~~~stangy | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 2/26/2006 8:00:21 AM | Men can accept someone with bipolar, if they are not so self-centered and self-pleasing. it is obvious that men and women are truly different, for the most part. men do not appear to be equipped to handle this type of situation. they will give it a try, but they tend to give up too easily and walk away. the problem is that they do not know how to use the "proper tools" to achieve a successful relationship, even when there are other strenuous factors present. I am not saying there are no men out there that can handle stressful relationships - there are! I am just speaking in generalities.
girlfriend, do not lose the faith or hope! someone is out there who will want to be with you and will do anything it takes to be able to handle your medical condition....you just have to be patient and remain positive!! a positive individual will be able to attract more people than one who is down and negative....just keep that in mind. I am not saying that the burden is all on you, but you have to show the men that you are a great individual and your medical condition can be controlled and maintained properly!
good luck to you!!! | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/6/2006 9:48:55 PM | I went out with someone for 2 years who had this condition. When I first met her she was in the process of attempting suicide, I stayed with her in hospital and entering into a relationship with her was the last thing I had on my mind. But It happened anyway because she was good looking and I got on well with her.
I only worked a few hours a day then so I had loads of free time, she was unemployed so we spent most of our time out and about doing stuff together.
Whenever she felt depressed i'd make sure we did something, basically we were always busy, this suited me because I can't sit around the house doing nothing or i'll get bored.
After about 10 months she stopped taking her medication and apart from the odd boubht she was ok. Really it was my fault she stopped taking her meds cos i constantly kept pushing her too, I feel guilty for this because i am by no means an expert on the subject.
I still speak to her occasionally but she has gone back to how she was before which is a shame, I guess i'd like to think that our relationship was good for her and that in some way I helped her. In case your wondering the reason we split up was because of family disputes there was no problems with the relationship itself, we were very very happy together.
So to answer your question in order to accept someone you need to be open minded and try to understand them. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/7/2006 8:50:17 PM | | If you can stay on your meds a relationship is possible. But if you are like most bipolar and don't think there is something wrong with them, or the meds make them sick so they avoid them. Then no you can't have a normal relationship with a man. You would drive him nuts, especially if he doesn't know about your mania and your depressive moods. There are a lot of homeless people on the streets that suffer from bipolar or scitzaphrenia because they don't like the way the meds make them feel. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/7/2006 9:53:14 PM | | yes. I speak from experience on this matter. again though, staying on your meds may indeed be required, as it might be more likely that if you stop your meds, ... YOU may leave him | |
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mytoy
| | Joined: 11/14/2004
Msg: 10 | |
| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/8/2006 7:28:23 AM | | i do take meds. i take them everyday as prescribed but i sometimes feel as if i'm being used as a "lab rat" i don't leave people in the dark.. i tell whoever i'm with so if they are going to run i don't get hurt. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/10/2006 2:21:47 AM | whether it bipolar or Clinic depression people should learn more about mental illness and they would understand that people with mental illness can lead very productive lives. they can be senitive compasionate, loving, caring and above all probalby more understanding about being senitive to all kind of baggage we all carry.
if you really love someone; the old fashion statements that says you should accept the person for who they are??? I think it takes a special person to be able accept someone with mental illness because there is still a stigma attached to the illness. With proper medication most people do recover and can lead lives that also include participating in a very lovely relationship.
just something to think about!!!! | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/12/2006 10:26:20 AM | | jericho, there is a hell of a difference between clinical depression and bipolar. People with clinical depression know that is something off with them and seek help usually in the form of a antidepressant drug. Bi Polar people off meds are just plain crazy. They don't seek out a cure and if someone makes them take it (family members) As soon as they are old enough to go off them They drop the drugs because in their mind the drugs are controlling them and they don't want to be controlled. They would rather be crazy then controlled. Plus many bipolar people think there is nothing wrong with them at all. I just watched a man go through 8 years of sheer hell with a biploar wife. Before he got a divorce. I told him he should consider himself damn lucky that the courts gave him a divorce. Because a wife off her meds in mentally incompetent. And these days you cannot divorce a mental incompetent spouse. Its called deminished capacity. Unless of course you have a damn good lawyer.He said I don't understand , she wasn't like that when i married her. I said was she on meds then? He said yes, But the minute I told her she acted so much better when she was on the meds. She totally stop taking the meds. BiPolar is a very scary mental illness when not treated. Like she said I know I have a monster in me. But she just couldn't stay on the meds. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/12/2006 11:12:25 AM |
Bi Polar people off meds are just plain crazy.
Listen to the psychologist, she's always right. I have a friend with Bipolar and she chooses not to take her meds. She is one of the sweetest people you will ever meet but of course she has her bad days. She knows when she is having a bad day and tries to limit being in contact with anyone during that time. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/12/2006 6:45:36 PM | you seem to know everything about this illness; you ought to be a doctor; not all manic depressive patients stop taking there medicine. do you have clinical depression; Don't make light of clinical depression; or any other mental illness. Until you've walked the walk don't be so judgemental about mental illness.
Are you going to judge a serious condition as bipolar disorder; on one persons actions. you not very educated on the subject. | |
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Ligs
| | Joined: 8/14/2005
Msg: 15 | |
| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/12/2006 7:37:21 PM | I work with children who have been diagnosed as bipolar as well as teenagers who are in a depressed state and to hear someone call another diagnosed with either of these illness as "crazy" is not only ignorant, but unfounded, shame on you. As mentioned previously each person has a different experience and each diagnoses is treated differently.
To the OP, good for you for remaining on your meds. Be honest with whomever you date and the "right one" will understand, and love you for you. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/12/2006 9:45:22 PM |
Are you going to judge a serious condition as bipolar disorder; on one persons actions. you not very educated on the subject.
Thank you jericho! My point exactly!! | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 3/12/2006 10:27:26 PM | I am sure we can all think of a time in our life when we have
been around a person who is on the "Upside" of bipolar_ness.
Most men will agree : manic women can be extremely fun. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 4/1/2006 1:15:31 AM | "Most men will agree : manic women can be extremely fun."
I chuckled at this because it is pretty true. I am bipolar and when I get manic (or at least hypo-manic) men seem to come out of the woodwork to be around me. I am lively... witty... sexually charged... and out to conquer the world. I got engaged to someone while in this state once. Didn't work so well when I crashed. He said and did some extremely hurtful things once he discovered that I wasn't like that 24/7. Having someone in your life that is not understanding, supportive... and even gets abusive with you because of your instability is a recipe for disaster.
Bipolar women (men too) need to protect themselves from being with mates who will drive them to deep dark places where suicide seems the best solution out.
"Can men accept someone with bipolar?"
Yes. But sweetie... don't be so grateful someone is willing to "put up" with your struggles that you overlook anything about them that can harm you or make your struggles more difficult. A good partner will be willing to learn everything about your illness... and help you to manage life daily. They will point you towards things that will benefit you... as ultimately it will benefit the relationship too.
Let potential mates know your story. Be honest. You might be surprised at how many men are eager to take on that challenge. Keep in mind though... that you have a huge impact on making the relationship work from then on by being faithful to taking care of yourself... and doing everything in your power to stay balanced. Being with someone who is bipolar and is not taking care of themselves is a very scary and trying thing. Even the best of relationships cannot easily survive that. If you love them... you will do everything you can to stay healthy.
I thought of a little analogy to what I am looking for myself in a man... what I will not settle for anything less than... perhaps this will help you too?
Most men really get into or at least appreciate high performance vehicles. These cars are fantastic... however they need extra special care to keep them in tiptop shape. Those that own them pour quite a bit of money into regular maintenance and tune ups to keep these babies purring. A bipolar mind is a high performance mind. Its capabilities far exceed those of a more average mind... when cared for and properly balanced it is amazing to see what it can do. Symphonies are written overnight... artistic masterpieces come to life on canvas... complex mathematical proofs never before solved are suddenly clear. Minds like these need care... but the payoff of a mind cared for is a beautiful thing to behold. I tell people that I want a man to love me FOR my mind. Not in spite of it. That the maintenance required is not thought of as a burden... but as part of the complex package that contains a thing of beauty. With the right care and support I can accomplish great things in my lifetime. I hope to find someone someday who will want to go on that journey with me.
Make sure that you only get involved with men who do not see you as "ill" or "needing to be fixed"... these men will only get frustrated as you continue to cycle. They will not have the patience and understanding you will need to help you stay balanced. Yes you have a disorder that needs some special care... but not unlike someone with diabetes who has to take insulin... or an asthmatic that needs to carry an inhaler... you just need to take care of yourself and you can lead a very fulfilling... "normal" life!
He'll find you sweetie... you just keep taking care of yourself... | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 4/2/2006 3:13:12 PM | We are all bipolar. get into marathons and yoga etc. most importantly, get off the chemicals shrinks prescribe.
I don't think you really know what you are talking about. Sure, we all have our "ups" and "downs", but people who are bipolar have much more extreme ups and downs. They also exhibit what I call "Target Fixation" or "Goal Focused" behaviour, brought about by a linear thinking pattern.
It's a complex and trying illness that can produce very distinguished accomplishments. However, simply running marathons and practising yoga will not cure the problem. I used to run 5km every second day after work (construction) and I would do it in under 20mins (17mins on average). I also took extremely good care of my "mental health" back then aswell but that is not something I can easily type out.
Anyways what happened to me (which I didn't understand at the time) was I became "maniac". I literally felt like I knew God personally. People where drawn to me, it was like I had a gift (I would love to be like that again, but it is a very tough road to walk). I cannot describe it to you much better than that, but the point is running and yoga will not fix the problem. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 4/27/2006 6:55:23 PM | I hope I am doing this correctly.What are your feelings on BPD? It is ver similiar to Bi-Polar? I found out I have this in 1998.Yes these Extreme ups and downs it is so hard for my relationships to work out...Even with my female friends how do you explain this to new found friends? I go into either anxiety attacks or depression.The linear thinking pattern is similiar to BPD.A Marsha Linehan's Book is a tool to assist with behaviour and thinking patterns.
You Literally Felt Like You Knew GOD PersonallY !!!! Great FOR You .....
I cant even imagine this, I know when I go for a walk within nature.I feel so at Peace though. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 4/29/2006 12:50:09 AM | Your guy should know you.Your cycle,meds,and all I missed.
I've never disqualified honest people who do all they can to manage whatever.
Progress is a result-not my call-I'm to support my sig.other.
If I criticise,condemn...it gets worse only if I give advise.
I know,not the third degree,my lady-friends.
As if a thief steals-no suprise-if a lady gets witchy,I know by the calendar if it's time for that
;or if Her complaint may be my job to fix.
Bi-Polar can,treatment notw/standing,be too much-on rare occassions.Concurrent w/drug-abuse,childhood abuse,or other condition makes it harder.
You owe a prospective guyfriend the truth.
When someone is making themselves vulnerable,I wanna help-a common reaction!
The right guy will accept you.If he acquires a book on the subject&asks too many questions-hang on to him. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 4/30/2006 3:12:41 AM | Short answer: Yes.
Long answer: Many men can accept someone with BPD. The fact is you gotta be straight up with them. If you try and hide the fact that you may suffer a depressive or manic episodes, when it happens, you're risking the relationship. Moreover, if you let them know and they can't accept it at that point, you'll know it the relationship wasn't worth the investment of your time. I've lived with a parent who is BP and it's certainly not a walk in the park, but it is something that can be looked past. BPD does not define who you are, you do. Don't be afraid to be upfront about it. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 5/1/2006 6:13:32 PM | | Everyone has their ups and downs in life, it just so happens that ours are a bit more extreme for the most part. Most people who fear it either had a bad experience or have had no experience at all. All you can do is be open and honest, keep up with your meds and practice your coping skills. So many people out there function and make it very far in life, eventhough they suffer with this disorder. It is possible to have a healthy relationship and life. | |
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| can men accept someone with bipolar?
Posted: 5/2/2006 5:22:27 AM | You know, I can empathize with you. Some people fear what they do not understand, as simple as that. Sometimes people hear a label and refer to what they heard rather than wanting to learn about what it really is. Everyone deserves to be happy and recieve love and companionship and yes relationships can be difficult, but it takes work like everything else in life.
Refering to kismet66's post... not all men are "not equipped" to handle a situation with a lady who has bi-polar. There are some that are very understanding and patient of bi-polar people, especially if they have bi-polar themselves or something similar to it.
I have faith in you, mytoy in your search for someone. Bi-polar or not, nothing can be any better than good sincere heart like yours. =) | |
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