| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 1:47:14 PM | | Shaking your head yet? I would have been right there beside you a month ago. We both have been in long term relationships and now we know what we want. We both agree that its crazy how well we get along and how connected we are in such a short period of time The chemistry,communication and connection is there. For me I feel he is who I am meant to be with ...and everything else that has happened in our life before this..has happened for a reason and brought us together. Rolling your eyes yet?? I guess my question is... are there any believers out there that this truely does happen and if your not a believer ..tell me why? | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 1:50:07 PM | I'm skeptical, but not pessimistic about your situation. And it's just a part of my emotional survival toolkit. I think you might be missing that tool, but that doesn't mean that your relationship won't be wonderful.
I wish you the best. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 1:50:22 PM | Yes - I believe it happens...I am in this situation right now. Be VERY careful....once the newness wears off and reality sets in, you might be surprised what comes out in the wash.
Squeak | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 1:53:38 PM | | Yes, I believe that things truly do happen. Because that's what things do. That's what life does. It happens. I do not believe in providence, if that is what you were more accurately asking, for that would suggest a greater scheme or grand design to which we all are preordained. | |
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Xavi
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Joined: 1/6/2006
Msg: 5 | |
| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 1:56:59 PM | Limerence is great -- it's what people feel when they think they are in love at first site.
True love is when you have met each other's relatives, been through flu season together and divvied up the household chores, and you still want to cuddle at the end of the day. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 1:58:10 PM | Yes I do believe it happens. I had strong feelings for my sweetie nearly from the beginning. We still took our time getting to know each other. Since we are long distance, it wasn't like we could jump in the car and go meet. It worked out fine for us.
Noone can tell you what you feel and the rush is intoxicating. Enjoy the feelings, just don't rush anything. It's a joy to take your time and get to know someone in a relaxed, non-pressure way. Discovering all the aspects of what makes them unique. You can't skip or hurry the getting acquainted part, invest time in that. If you take the time to TRULY know them well, then you can avoid numerous situations or potential problems. If you can truly know him thoroughly, understand and accept him 100% and vice versa then you have a solid base for a happy and long lasting relationship.
I can feel your excitement, I am happy for both of you and hope for you the very best! | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 2:08:09 PM | I believe that infatuation happens often at first sight but real love NO.
You ask why: because there is no possible way that anyone can know another human being that well in just three weeks. It's difficult enough even after many years to know how someone will react to things like serious illness or the death of a child, etc.....big important things that can erase love very quickly..... or conversely draw a couple closer together according to the reaction displayed. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 2:29:53 PM | I believe that you don't need to know a person for a long time to know you love them. Love happens, sometimes quickly and sometimes slowly. I met a girl on line and then we met in person. We clicked together fast. It was like we had always known each other. Six months later we were engaged. 18 months later we broke up. We lost that feeling that was there in the begining. Who knows where it went. Were still friends.
My brother and his wife when first meeting each other in college went out for a date, no impression. They went their ways. A year later they met again and it was like love at first sight. Four grown kids later and a home of their own and they are still going strong.
Love is strange. Always test it for a long while before making long term commitments. Yol'll be glad you did.
I do believe that love can happen fast but the success stoies are so few I won't go there. The odds are against your relationship making it if you don't give what your feeling a chance to grow and mature to see if it'll stay strong or begin to fade away. I would go for a two year minimum to test it.
I hope it does work out for you. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 2:48:50 PM | I like the person who said "skeptical but not pessimistic".
I can say I am less skeptical now than I might have been in the past, but overal - I like to believe in love and true connections and fate, so good luck!  | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 2:53:43 PM | | Sure, it can happen. Now take your time over many months to really be sure and see each other under all kinds of circumstances and stresses. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 3:07:56 PM |
For me I feel he is who I am meant to be with ...and everything else that has happened in our life before this..has happened for a reason and brought us together.
If he is the only visible thing in your eyes, no matter what anyone else says, you are NOT listening anyway. Why bother asking ? | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 3:58:06 PM | I've got to believe in it. I however think Zentral's common sense is the most important thing you've gotten here. If he truly is the one he will be in a year, 2 whatever. There is no test like time, and 3 weeks is not time, it is but the opening breath of relationship IMHO. Enjoy yourself, you have any sane person's greatest wishes. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 5:00:15 PM | amy,
Happened to me. I had no interest in even meeting anyone, just got out of a stifling relationship.
Met this girl, had sex a few hours later, spent the weekend together, called her monday to let her know I was going to call and we talked for 7 hours.
She moved in 4 months later, it will be 3 years next week and we are engaged.
We had a few bumps, but we just clicked. It can happen. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 6:53:29 PM | (OP) are there any believers out there that this truely does happen
Of course it can happen. I believe that's the way it's supposed to happen.
I met my partner and we started staying at each other's place almost immediately. Within six months we had bought a home and moved in together. I was 43 and my partner was 34.
Did we have differences? HA! Different languages although my partner is bilingual. Different religion. Different politics. Different levels of education. (My partner is well educated.) In fact many members of our families and friends were surprised we ever got together, let alone stayed together! Actually, we were surprised, as well. 
Every once in a while we joke about what we thought were the possibilities we would be together for any length of time when we first started out. Nada. Zero. Zilch. We were both completely independent so we made a rule. If something bothered us we would tell the other. If nothing changed we would mention it again and then drop it. Nobody is going to change. Nobody is going to make the other change. It's as simple as that.
Now, some folks can't understand how a relationship like that works but it works beautifully. We were independent before we met and we stay independent after we meet. No big mystery.
The recipe for a great relationship is not complicated. The first day two people meet they do not care what the person did yesterday or what they're going to do tomorrow. They are happy at the moment. Just look at every day as the first day.
I hear people say they change or grow and their partner doesn't. People can change and grow all they want but they can not expect their partner to do so. If both change/grow who follows whom? The whole idea is absurd. One can change and still remain in a relationship if they love the person. Again, always think back to the first day/week/month. One was happy just spending time with the person and that's what it's all about.
IMO it has absolutely nothing to do with friendship in the sense two people are doing things together all the time. A romantic partner is not a buddy or a sidekick. They are a romantic partner. They are the person one goes to bed with, makes love with and wakes up with. If that's what was important when they first met, which it should have been, and they recognize that importance throughout the relationship then the relationship will last.
My partner and I will have been together ten (10) years this May. Who would have thunk it? 
Yes, more than once I've seen her slightly shake her head. Are we different? Of course we are different. We are lovers, not friends, not buddies but lovers.
Your post is a breath of fresh air! Congratulations to you and yours. It's nice to know love is alive and well. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 7:05:31 PM | If I had a nickel for everytime I've read something similar, I'd be rich. Of course things seem too good to be true and "perfect" in the very beginning - but see how you both feel after 3 months, how strong and perfect your relationship is then, then give us an update.
Is this one of those situations where you've only just chatted/emailed/talked on the phone but haven't yet met in person? | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 7:17:12 PM | amy xo
I see no reason why a relationship can not last with only knowing a person for a few minutes. I have seen it happen ,and it does. Remember also though, that even though you clicked right away,that there is alot of work ahead. | |
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ksue44
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Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 18 | |
| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 7:23:20 PM | Anything is possible! Congratulations, but like the other posts have mentioned, do take it easy and slow.. Think of your relationship as a wonderful wine, sip it slowly, and enjoy it... When I was in college, I saw this guy in the library.. I don't know why, there's no way humanly possible that I can explain it, but I knew he was the "one" I wanted to spend the rest of my life with! He was dating some other gal at the time, but eventually they broke up.. We introduced ourselves, we dated for a year, got engaged, and got married a year & half after our engagement. We did come close to breaking up once (before our marriage)... I had a wonderful 10 years with this fella..
There are just things in life that for whatever reason, its just best not to question, and it really comes down to something inside of you just clicks, and I think it is a combination of the head, heart, soul and gut... The gut will speak loudly and if after some face to face time with this fella (good times & bad times - take a vacation with him), things still seem right, then you can be doubly sure he is the one.. Prayfully, he will feel the same about you too. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 7:33:11 PM | You know, anything is possible, and if it works out for you, then all the better. I felt this way about one of the guys that I was dating, and we were even talking about the future and what not after only a month. He told me that I was everything that he was looking for. 2 weeks later he broke up with me and told me the complete opposite. I've been having a heck of a time getting over it.
I guess the only thing that I can say is be careful, and really know what you are getting yourself into. Sometimes guys don't know what they are getting themselves into and end up getting scared off. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 8:36:56 PM | | The One. Hmmm...Quite possibly he is the "one" whom you have an amazing connection with at this moment in time, it's also possible that someone else just as amazing in a different way may come along and take your breath away, or his for that matter. Yes the feelings are there, yes they are real and true and cause a euphoric state like nothing else. If you are feeling this way, then he must be as well right? That's what I believe. But like Chickitta posted above, you do have to be careful... be in the moment, enjoy the experiences and conversations you are having, try not to get too much into future time. Because sometimes, even when the energies being exchanged are stunningly transcendental, something could occur that will stop the momentum of the new relationship in its tracks, and when this happens it ****ing hurts. So- guard your heart a bit, this does not mean becoming bitter, you are just looking out for yourself. Also, don't give your trust away too easily. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/23/2006 8:57:11 PM | Boy, there are alot of cynics on here. My parents met and were married within 6 months. And they have been married 46 years. I truly believe it can happen, after doubting it, and contemplating it.I never believed things happen for a reason, or fate, or some kind of preordained or master plan.It happened to me after a few weeks with someone. Do we have still have to get to know one another? Sure.
Is there going to be rough spots? Probably. Are we moving to fast? Don't know, and nobody else can judge because they are not in that situation. All I can say is that we are moving at a pace that is comfortable for us. Am I afraid of getting hurt again? Yes, especially so soon out of a relationship. Do I think I'll get hurt? Honestly, no. We have both come out of similar situations, we both have a child that lives with us, my daughter with me, her son with her. Our ex's both have exactly the same job, albeit with different companies and in different towns.We connected on so many levels. All I know is something guided me to her, she answered my ad on another site, but I couldn't answer her back. I joined here and checked out the local girls and there she was, I figured it was too weird a coincidence so I decided to give it a shot. I can't predict the future, I don't know what is going to happen. But I do see a future with her, and she has met my parents and daughter already, and everyone thinks she's awesome.She is everything I want and need. Find it hard to believe, after only a short time? Sure you do. But I know what I feel, I'm not a 15 year old kid, with his first crush. I happen to agree with Amy's post 100%. BTW, I'm the guy she's talking about. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/24/2006 12:06:05 AM | The recipe for a great relationship is not complicated. The first day two people meet they do not care what the person did yesterday or what they're going to do tomorrow. They are happy at the moment. Just look at every day as the first day.
I agree wholeheartedly, its the only way, appreciate what you have at that moment. Now try telling that to a woman who thinks the future is more important than the present. Which would be every woman I've ever dated, just about. | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/24/2006 12:14:32 AM | | believers, yes...BUT:delay it for your own good. trust me. things that are not too elating might surface then you wouldn't really know what to do!are you willing to risk that all up? | |
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| He is the one....only after 3 weeks
Posted: 2/24/2006 12:17:01 AM | | Met a fella once and four days later started a journey with him that lasted twenty years - anything is possible. | |
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