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| | Girlfriends names.... lolPage 1 of 4 (1, 2, 3, 4) | Hey ladies, sorry, I had this emailed to me and thought it would be funny. No offense, and by all means feel free to post the guys names! Anyways... lets see if this sheds any light on basically nothing...
Girlfriend Name Analysis
Ada – Blue-haired, smells of wee.
Aileen - Laughs like a demented dog. Likes Tic-Tacs.
Alison - Bra and pants are the same garment. Looks better with the light off.
Amanda - I.Q. tends to be smaller than bra size. Probably a good shag though.
Amy - Devious, likes being on top, never stays the night - not to be trusted.
Andrea - Small breasts, drinks pints.
Angela - Vain, hairstyle more important than oxygen. Usually found hanging around toilets.
Annabelle - Doesn`t wear knickers.
Anne - Looks like a horse, can`t drive.
Annette - She`s BIG.
Barbara - Shags like a rabbit, not fussy about appearance.
Becky - Repressed alcoholic.
Belinda - Pleasing on the eye, usually has a couple of good points.
Beverley - Trapped in an Eighties time-warp.
Bianca – Blonde on top, ginger below.
Bridget - Eats pizzas all day, smokes cigars.
Britney - Falsely improved, no use to society.
Camilla - Replaces the word “yes” with “ya”.
Caroline - Lard a***, shaves her ears.
Carrie - Looks like the back of a bus, doesn`t go down.
Catherine - Attracted to older women, needs ironing.
Celine - Emits hideous noises, waste of DNA.
Charlotte - Enjoys tea and cake, farts the national anthem.
Cheryl - Can fit hand in mouth, eats glass.
Christine - Likes women in uniform, cold hands.
Claire - Usually neurotic, gives good head, can have bisexual tendencies.
Daisy - Virgin.
Danielle - Should make nice threesome with sibling.
Davina - Drug-induced mental damage, should shave her neck.
Dawn - Gets up early, smells of chips.
Deborah - Bites the pillow, uses both hands.
Dee - Cannot understand why no one else masturbates in Ikea.
Denise - Sits on cats, wears too much make up.
Diane - Enjoys company of animals. Deep as a puddle. Adds nothing to society.
Donna - Seventies throw-back, likes cabbage.
Doris - Purple-haired, stinks of wee.
Dorothy - Big, tall woman who talks shite all day.
Elaine - Rides side saddle, drinks meths.
Elizabeth - Born to perform, hates chickens.
Ellie - Far too attractive for the filthy language that come out of her mouth.
Emily - Wears odd socks, likes gravy.
Emma - Gullible and easily swayed by a good-looker.
Estelle - Likes Wombles, eats grass.
Esther - Plump with sagging breasts, normally heavily tattooed.
Faith - Legs meet at knees, can`t shag standing up.
Faye - Wears wellies, can`t swim.
Felicity - She`ll stab you with her nipples, plays darts.
Fiona - Female mud wrestler, likes going down on her lovers.
Gail - Farts a lot, drinks Guinness.
Gaynor - Lesbian, but doesn’t know it.
Gemma - Does anal, wears too much eye make-up.
Georgina - Wants to be a man.
Geraldine - Too posh for her own good, likes flying.
Gillian - Dyes her hair green, likes clubbing.
Gina - Eternal mother, eats nappies.
Glenda - Eats children, hates smoking.
Gwen - Blubs a lot, wees in the bath.
Hannah - Needs to be naked at all times, eats kebabs.
Heather - Shags like a freight train, a screamer.
Heidi - The hills are alive with the sound of music, likes gherkins.
Helen - Hangs around with the wrong crowd, kinky in bed, loves porn.
Hilary - Frigid.
Holly - Prickly to the touch, seasonal shagmeister.
Imogen - Drinks tequila from the bottle, wets the bed.
Ingrid - Nazi tendencies, never smiles.
Jackie - Heroin addict, sold her child.
Jane - Babe, I`d drink her bath water.
Janet - Massive overbite, no neck.
Jennifer - Huge breasts, should shave her legs more often.
Jessica – Virgin and always will be.
Joanne - Moans in her sleep, can’t cook.
Judith - Big eyes, small tits.
Judy - Huge tits, girlfriend is on the LPGA tour!!!
Julia - Innocent face, don`t trust her, she`ll steal your wallet in five minutes.
Julie - Jabba the Hutt`s sister, constantly pregnant.
Justine - Comedy tits, likes hanging around women`s toilets.
Karen - Good tits, shags like a rabbit.
Kate - See Catherine.
Kathleen - Smells of sewers, eats the heads off rats.
Kay - Hated by her parents, accidental pregnancy.
Kelly - Smells of cheese, slobbers when kissing.
Kimberley - Wants to be a bloke, drinks like a bloke, farts like a bloke, wears a wig.
Kirsty - Eats live moles, can`t dance.
Kylie - Can`t sing but who cares.
Lara - Action-packed, never seen naked.
Laura – Always wears a dildo, can`t drive.
Lauren – Nasal hair, seldom ventures out at night.
Leah - Likes outdoor sex, wees standing up.
Lena - Eats food then throws up, rapidly shrinking.
Leslie - Likes bondage, hates men.
Lily - Teenage slag, can swallow oranges whole.
Lindsey - Likes doggy-style, doesn`t do housework.
Lisa - Will take all your money and run, gets turned on by porn.
Liz - Long legged and brainy.
Lorraine - Constantly whinges, will strip for a packet of Jellybabies.
Louise - Likes to get around, saggy tits.
Lucy - Strange dancer, wants to shag her mum.
Madeline - Drives like a bloke, likes tractors.
Maggie - Train-spotter, likes tartan.
Marcia - Big bum, small brain.
Margaret – Rides a moped, very generous.
Maria – Eats like a horse, outstays her welcome.
Marie – Wife-swapping dominatrix. Likes men to do DIY.
Marina - No get up and go, rusty underwear.
Martine - Can`t act, can`t sing, nice tits.
Maryanne – Mean, vicious.
Matilda - Likes dancing, mainly the waltz.
Meg - Cheesy smell, should be spelt with an S.
Melanie – Shaved off her eyebrows.
Melissa - Eats dogs, been in prison six times for burglary.
Mercedes - Dances like an ape, doesn`t realise.
Michaela - Likes animals, should make a video with them.
Michelle - Wears white stilettos, dances round her handbag.
Monica - Doesn`t swallow, should have.
Nancy - White hair, pimples.
Naomi - Wannabe diva, more of a diver.
Natalie - Eats with her mouth open, farts the Nokia phone tune.
Natasha - Had seven kids before she was 17, needs ironing.
Nicola - Hasn`t realised WWII has ended, lives in Kent.
Nicole - Slapper, alcoholic in denial.
Nina - Stuffs her bra with tissues, been single for years.
Olivia - Neutron bomb.
Pamela - Gives amazing head, made of plastic.
Pat – Wishes she was a police officer.
Paula - Transvestite merchant banker from Basildon.
Penelope - Pitstop queen, likes women to be moist.
Phillippa - Forest forager, likes wild boar.
Priscilla - Likes painting with oils, Duckhams mainly.
Rachel - Amazing gravity-defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her a*** cheeks.
Rebecca - Hairy armpits, orgasms without contact.
Rosie - Can be prickly, bit of a ****.
Rula - She measures up well.
Ruth - Can swallow a Curly Whirly whole, likes bananas.
Sadie – Wears big pants, shags like a chimp.
Sally - Drives a truck, fights in pubs.
Samantha - Loves her brother, has four deformed children.
Sandra - Shags donkeys for fun, bow legged.
Sara - Likes pressed flowers and writes bad poetry.
Selina - Doesn`t wear pants, heavy laundry bills.
Sharon - Shags like a locomotive, yo-yo knickers.
Sian - Does mean sheep impression, hates mint sauce.
Simone - Used to be a shot-putter from Cardiff.
Sonia – Prostitute, wears aftershave.
Sophie - Brothel madam, wears a wrinkly corset.
Stacey - Likes cut-off jeans and a***-less Speedos.
Steffi - Closet lesbian, maintains heterosexual relationship for effect.
Stephanie - Eats microwave chips, wears brogues.
Sue/Suzanne - Should shave more often.
Tallulah - Easily swayed by alcohol. Mostly seen without underwear. Loves kittens.
Tamsin - You can park a bike in her a*** crack, excessive facial hair.
Tanya - Hot minx, too short.
Tara - Upper-class slapper, needs extra chemicals.
Tina - Face like a smacked a***, should eat more.
Tori - Lives in a hedge, can`t water-ski.
Tracey – Dyke who can’t pass.
Ursula - Likes puppies (in curry).
Vicky - Likes Yoga, does loud fanny farts.
Wendy - Possibly a man.
Yvonne – Easy-going, problem with facial hair.
Zoe - Talentless rock chick. Prepared to use sex as a weapon | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:28:38 PM | hehe... I took yours out.. I will tell you later what yours means babe!!!  | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:34:00 PM |
Melissa - Eats dogs, been in prison six times for burglary
I HATE dogs!!! And I only went to prison twice!!  | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:38:06 PM |
Rachel - Amazing gravity-defying breasts, can grip a tenner in her a*** cheeks.
I guess I'm the only one who'll ever know............LOL | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:38:36 PM |
Angela - Vain, hairstyle more important than oxygen. Usually found hanging around toilets.
I actually like oxygen. And I try not to hang around toilets too much. | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:40:47 PM | My name is not on there either.....
Well not spelt as my name is anywayz | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:42:37 PM | No bloody way melly......
If they cannot put my name in there with the correct spelling...sod em.....   | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:43:12 PM | Maryanne – Mean, vicious.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
(still laughing!)
i can see the potential, don't make me have to use it!!! | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:48:59 PM | | My ex wifes name isnt in there either... but I have a pretty good one for that particular name.... but Im sure there are some.... maybe one fairly decent Crystals in the world. I will never buy into it... but I have been known to be wrong before... | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:49:11 PM | think i'm a wanna-be Bridget.........and a whole lot of Matilda...and a lil bit of Sarah.....
good lord....who am i...??????
lol...cute...i like it....where's the male version though?...
edit: ok....just saw the Siam and Ursala.........forget it.....tendancies to be all of the above at some point in the space-time continuum... | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:49:40 PM | Becky - Repressed alcoholic.
yah ok, thats another reason why i dont drink and only 
once i start drinking i just cant stop seriously
edit: thanks mel, and yes he is LATE woohoooo, face riding for me tonight. lol | |
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YX32
| | Joined: 7/10/2005
Msg: 15 | |
| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:51:10 PM | Okay now I've got a complex, only half of my name is in there and I don't like what half of my name means...booohoooo!
Hmph! I'm going to just take my toys and go home and play with myself! Hmph!!!!! | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:51:58 PM | BBawwwahhhaa! Becky, i was waiting for you to come in here!!! hahahahahaaha
Ah geeze.
Too funny.
I have to leave.
Puff puff pass becky
*grins* | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 7:59:25 PM |
think i'm a wanna-be Bridget.........and a whole lot of Matilda...and a lil bit of Sarah.....
good lord....who am i...??????
HAHAHA... thats hillarious!!! | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 8:06:09 PM | @OP
Here are a few I've learned in my travels.
Wendy - Likes to give oral sex.
Shelly - Likes sex on the beach.
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 9:29:18 PM | Joanne - Moans in her sleep, can’t cook
so true.
I masterbate in my sleep. | |
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| Girlfriends names.... lol
Posted: 2/27/2006 9:32:22 PM | | I am glad my name is not on there...and I can think of at least one name that should NOT be on there, eric lol! | |
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