| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 1:29:14 PM | | I am taking care of my Gramps and he has alzheimers as well as diabetes. He is takin meds to help with the alzheimers but the meds worked for maybe two weeks. Now he is back to being...well....only words I can think of is a pain in the rear! He wakes up from a nightmare but doesnt realize it was nightmare and he basically lives that nightmare. He gets mean, tries leaving in the middle of the night( with no clothes on) Hits and throws things at me when I wont let him outside. Refuses to take his meds and shots for his diabetes, refuses to eat. In addition to careing for him I have my 3 kids to take care of. I want to know if anyone has dealt with someone with alzheimers and what you did to deal with the emotional stresses of it. | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 4:08:29 PM | i can't say i have ever delt with this before^^ but my goodness, here i am thinking that my son can be quite a handful at times...i honestly don't know how you do it.
I hear that alzheimers is quite a dreadful thing to go through...quite frightening from i hear, plus 3 children on top of that? You have your hands full. | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 4:25:24 PM | I have.
With my Great-Uncle who was an ex Navy officer in the second world war.
It's not fun when they have flashbacks.
My best advice to you is if he's becoming a danger to himself, you, or your family the best thing you can do for him is either try to get him a full time care worker, or try to find an extended care hospital for him [in other words, an old folks home]. Despite what people say, most ECHs are very well run and provide excellent service.
After caring for my Great-Uncle we finally had to find him somewhere else. He was leaving his apartment in the middle of the night, urinating on the road, exposing himself uptown, he hitch-hiked into the city once and luckily his part-time careworker drove past him and brought him back, he threatened to kill me when he was having flashbacks, he smacked my father and my younger sister.
You have to decide what is in the best interests of everyone involved.
Hope that helps  | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 6:43:19 PM | | He was in an old folks home.....But he wouldnt cooperate with the people there to help him. They had to keep taking him to the ER because he wouldnt take no meds,food nothing. He was close to going into a diabetic coma. Sometimes he is like a light switch....he will be fine and stuff one second...the next he wants to know where he is, who I am...... and its very unpredictable when they chage will happen. But when he is in a 'good mood' as I call it...I can atleast get him to eat and take meds an shots. At night it is worse. He will urinate on the walls...thinking they are urnals. Somenights he is up EVERY 20 minutes. Then he thinks he is in a hospital and freaks out. There was one night he thought he was in jail and thought I was a jail gaurd (yeah...jail gaurd in a bathrobe??lol) Anyway he told me he didnt do anything wrong and started crying and stuff because he thought he had been arrested. Hell I dont even know what to do when he gets like that. But I do know when he gets confused and thinks he is somewhere other then where he is, I cant let him think that. Even if I have to argue with him or repeat it to him 20million times within 2 hours. Otherwise if i let him think that he will have a 'good mood' and want to know why I lied and then he wont trust me. Its so confusing and very difficult. I cant even leave him alone when he is awake...sometimes when he is sleeping I cant leave him alone. Grrr....I am at a loss. It feels good to actaully vent though lol. | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 7:22:29 PM | Froggy Rose,
I've worked with and cared for a lot of people with Alzheimers' disease. It sounds like your grandfather is in the middle stages. It's good to vent, yes, but you need real help. You will not be able to deal with him at home for much longer without help. One thing you should do as soon as you can is to contact the Alzheimers' association in your community, if there is one. There is also a lot of info on the net and you might be able to find a support group. You need support because things will not get better for him. He needs routine - it will help a little if things always happen at the same time, and constant reminders (not arguments, which won't work, but will cause him to become more agitated). You also need three truck loads of patience and the ability to laugh at yourself.
It's a hard road that you are on. Ideally a good long-term care facility that has the right kind of care and security would be the best choice, if it is possible financially.
You also need to take care of yourself, or you will burn out.
lyrical | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 7:49:14 PM | | well,i`d say you are doing the right thing by taking care of your family...getting some help to do this sounds like a good idea-but please be very carefull with the advice people will give you-there may be a cure and there also may be certain people who don`t want the general public to know about these cures,much less any info on prevention...i was just reading an article last night about how Diabetes is cureable and how some evil people are just lying to everyone and making alot of money off this-almost all doctors say it is uncureable...it makes me wonder if Alzheimers sufferers are needlessly being made to suffer also...the article i read explains it all about the diabetes-how there is a cure for both types and why certain people don`t want you to know aboiut the cure...it is a shame how there is a cure for cancer and other horrible diseases but the medical community is covering this info up...radiation and chemotherapy are just two ways to kill the patient and make lots of money doing so...-i wouldn`t trust my family members to any of these evil corrupt people...allmost every disease is making certain folks alotta money...i would certainly do a google search and start readng and try to find out as much info as possible on this subject-it may be possible to bring about a more stable condition if not a total cure the article i read was at a Nexus website and is in Nexus magazine - a simple google search should turn up the same article on cure for diabetes - before you accept your doctors infinate wisdom,ask your doctor if he studied nutrition ...anyways,well,i hope your Grandfather starts feeling better soon | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2005 8:13:44 PM | I can barely deal with him at home as it is. There is no alzheimers support groups in my area. Which I thought odd because I live where alot of old ppl retire to. We do routine. The only thing that breaks the routine is if he wakes up late....or refuses his meals and meds. As for the arguments...When it comes to lil things I dont argue with him....but when he tries to leave thinking he is going 'home', I keep telling him he is home and there is no where to go, and I tell him its cold and slippery outside...he just tells me I am full of sh*t and nothing but a fu%king liar and so on. It is especially worse when he has strokes. He gets extremely mean. But has a really good day the next day. ( which is when I jump up and down with joy) I can usually tell when one is comming on to prepare for it but its still hard (btw~ strokes of the brain, not heart) The dr said there is nothing we can do for him for the strokes. But when the dr gave him the meds for the alzheimers he said if they werent strong enough then in 4 weeks he will up the dose. Still have a week and a half to go. But I am afraid that when he ups the dose....Gramps will be fine for a couple weeks like before but then go back to the way he is now.
Financially he can afford long term care....but he will go so down hill if we were to put him in one. My mom is his power of attorney and her stress level is about as high as mine. Her and I take care of him together but she cant deal as well with him and ends up yelling at him which I know is not good at all. Makes it worse. And she cant really deal with my kids either because she is so stressed out. So I end up taking care of everyone. I am trying to convince her to put him in a home....but she thinks he will die because he will not let anyone help him there. But the stress is going to kill her. I think if I had the say to put him in one....I would. Weither or not I think he is going to die faster or not. As cold as it sounds.....he has lived a full life. Its our turn to live our life...and as much as we love him and dont want him to go, I think it would be best. Am I selfish? Hell yeah I am. The stress in my life is also in my kids lives. They see him like this and have to deal with it as well as much as I try to sheild them from it I cant always stand in front of them and plug their ears. I want time to be with my kids. I want to just lay on the floor and play airplane and horsey rides and all that fun stuff my kids are missing out on. And I want a date. LOL Its been forever since I have been able to get out!! (Sorry this is so long but venting tonight is helping...hes having a bad night already and its not even 10:3pm yet)
Truck loads of patience? LOL You guys start sending it my way cuz God knows I need it! | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/5/2005 10:28:17 AM | | I work with alzheimers residents, (8 yrs now) It is a very emotional , and stressfull situation and to handle the stress is NOT easy, there are many places available online and in your community to help with this, find a support group and family and friends if available. Also what can help is to learn all you can abt this disease it might help to understand, our work has us do inservices and impair us to give us a idea of what it can be like and its a scary thing. I have been punched at pinched and meds spit back at me, as to how to best deal with it varies with each situation, good luck its a hard thing to cope with and I think it is great to see you take an interest in helping in whatever way you can, In my job the families are longer very active with them and thats a sad thing. | |
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jimi77
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Joined: 7/13/2004
Msg: 10 | |
| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/5/2005 10:40:02 AM | | my grandmother died of it .. it was quite sad.. I was happy to see her go.. she was not the person she was before and suffering. she ended up in a home for alzheimers. i went to see her every chance i got..and she called me her best son.. even though i was her grand son.. my heart goes out to you in this time.. prayers are with you also. | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/5/2005 12:28:45 PM | | my grandmother was recently diagnosed with altzheimers. i can only thank god that she isn't half as bad as most are. she can't remember things which causes arguments that shouldn't happen, she asks tons of questions (most of which you wouldnt begin to believe) about everything, she worries about everything and is very nosey. it's very hard living with her but i'm glad she's here with us instead of in a nursing home where we aren't sure what happens when we're not there. it can be very trying to take care of someone with the disease because you have to be very patient and understanding as well as set your everyday life to a specific routine so they won't get confused. i can understand your troubles and my prayers will be with you all | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 12/24/2007 10:53:46 AM | Just found this thread, and I was wondering if anyone is dealing with an alzheimers patient that isn't related to them? My grandfather had a girl friend before he died and we've always kept in touch with her because all her family is hours away from her. She gave my mother power of attorney and things like that before she got bad, and now we are trying to get her in a long term facility because she is to bad to stay in the assisted living that she is in. We don't really have many problems with Marge herself, because she's gotten quite docile as the disease has progressed, but we are having major problems with her sister. She lives 8 hours away, and is fighting us about everything. The sister doesn't think that the patient should be on any pills perscribed by her doctor, doesn't think that we are doing a good job, and has now informed us that she is going to take us to court in an attempt to get guardianship of Marge... Don't know if anyone has had to deal with this, but thought on it would be nice. I love Marge like she was my own grandmother, and I hate having to constantly be on guard when her sister is around. We have also had people tell us within the community that when Marge was still lucid she had expressed the fact that she didn't like her sister, because she was afraid that she was going to hit her...
My mom has considered giving up the rights that Marge gave her before the disease took hold, but we are afraid that Marge wouldn't be well cared for, and that we wouldn't be able to see her anymore because the sister wants her moved 8 hours away from us. Actually, the sister last night told us that "she didn't care what Marge wanted, she was going to do what was best for her" Because Marge told us a long time ago that she always wanted to stay in this area...
Thanks for reading my vent, please let me know if you have any suggestions!
J9 | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2008 6:17:22 PM | | I cared for my mom when she got that way. I was working and raising four kids and a husband, and it was not easy watching her go downhill. Bit by bit, I had to take over things for her. Checking acct, grocery shopping, house cleaning, showers. She never did drive, so that was a blessing. When she decided to try cooking in a tupperware bowl, I knew it was time to put her where she had more people around her. That lasted two months. She lost weight and I went and got her every weekend so she could visit us. And she cried when I had to take her back. I ended up finding a retired cna who wanted to care for her and was very upset that i hadnt asked her. She did okay there. Had smoked for years, and eventually forgot what a cigarette was and when my daughter took her newborn to see her, mom had even forgotton what a baby was. So sad......... I dont know which would be worse, to lose your mind and have a body that wont let go, or to be paralyzed and have a mind that is quick. | |
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| Anyone had to take care someone with alzheimers?
Posted: 2/1/2008 6:30:45 PM | My Grandfather died of this. I am so sorry you have to see him like this, but kudos to you for taking care. You might not be able to open the yellow pages and find "Alzheimers' support groups", but there are other things you can try. Your Area Agency on Aging may be able to help. You can also try calling a home care agency and see if they can point you in the right direction. You could ask your Grandpa's physician, or some churches also might be able to help you. If all that fails, maybe an online support group would be something to check out also. Best of luck to you and your family. It's a sad, sad disease that takes the best out of the best people we know. 
**edit** I just realized that this is a reborn thread and I was probably responding to the wrong person. lol So to the NEW OP, maybe those same agencies could help you, too. lol Best of luck to you too! | |
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