| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 9:07:11 AM | Ok, here is the situation.
I work at a trendy little restaurant that gets pretty busy with a youngish crowd on Thrursday nights. Its usually the same bunch of people that come down for a tasty beverage at a reduced "Thursday Night Price", and many of them are servers in other restaurants as well.
Last week, one of the guys came over and decided it was time to introduce himself. So after the "hi, I'm Joe" the conversation went something like this...
(him) "so, I think we should date"
(me) "oh really?"
(him) "yup, you and me, we'd make beautiful babies together.... sleep on it"
I kid you not, thats really what he said. I was speechless... which is uncommon for me!
So my question here is, why do guys decide that they should try to pick up their server/bartender.... the most sober girl there, that know's how many drinks you've consumed?
Would you hit on the bank teller?
I've worked as many different things, but it seems to only happen to me when I am a server. Any ideas? | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 9:12:35 AM | not that i do it..but i think its because there has already been an initial contact made already ..either through ordering drinks or exchange of smiles , so if the server/ bar girl smiles at the guy ..this could be misinterpreted as "she must like me" ...so makes it easier for the guy to approach you.
also bar girls have a bit of a reputation maybe thats the real reason!.. but what do i know ? | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 9:13:38 AM | | You hit the nail on the head, it's the alcohol. Plus it's your job to be friendly towards them. Although it has worked for me, if the guy was someone you found attractive and interesting would you automatically say no just because he asked you while you were working? | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 9:56:08 AM | | When you deal with the public you meet a lot more people than those that work in offices and such. Therefore, it only stands to reason that you would be hit on more than other people. I know a couple of bank tellers as well as a girl who works in a dry cleaners and they also get hit on a lot so I don't think alcohol is the only factor. | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 10:03:31 AM | The interesting thing to think about is what if she did like you and maybe would have wanted you to ask her out, and you didn't because of the perception that they are so used to being hit on or asked out by drunken patrons or simply because they are the female there etc.
I have often felt the same turmoil inside where you think that perhaps there might have been something there but there's the always the fact that yes shes being nice because she is paid to be that way and you don't want to come off as simply hitting on the waitress because i guess it can be a cliche for them.
Although I am normally shy and probably wouldn't do this but life only happens once and you never know you might meat the most awesome girl ever if your pro-active and this is just one circumstance :)
Have a great day | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 10:36:09 AM | Having worked as a server myself for two years through grad school I've seen that side of the coin. As a male server though the number of times I was hit on was far less than my female co-workers, but it still happens.
So long as the pick-up attempt is respectable (what that guy said to the OP was BS and he should be slapped fo it), I see nothing wrong with the attempt. At the worst, it's a compliment, albeit occasionally an unwelcome one. You have to try and think of it this way: where else would they have met you? Maybe a guy/girl you're serving sees you and thinks you are the most lovely creature he/she has ever seen, and simply could not pass up the attempt in good conscience for fear of never seeing you again...
In the case of regular patrons, then it's a little more weird because they know you to a certain extent, and should respect the client/server relationship unless they have genuine feelings/interest (above the "Hey you're hot, let's f*#k" level  )
It is also possible some of the fault lies with the server/bartender, the service industry is based on tips, and that means giving good service and trying to build a quick repore with the client that is quickly forgotten once the cheque has been paid and tip left behind. It's a delicate balance because you want to be friendly and make them like you, so that they treat you better when they ask for things and when they tip, but some servers take it up a notch and only see their clients as walking tip machines, and start flirting to try and sway the client into tipping better (hence the half-naked female bartender phenomenon you see at a lot of clubs)... This is a dangerous game because some men will have the good sense to realize you're just flirting your way into their wallet, and will tip just for the compliment, but some are going to misconstrue this for genuine interest and then you've just dug your tip its own grave when you reject them.
Food for thought 
P.S.: Yes I would hit on my bank teller if I thought she was hot... I'd also hit on my female doctor, her receptionist, grocery cashier, and just about any woman I found attractive and approachable if I was genuinely interested  | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 10:57:47 AM | Flirting with or being nice to servers is not the same as "picking them up"
I'm friendly by nature and cant help bein freindly to a nice woman whos bein friendly to me.
The question may be, if you are with a date, when have u crossed the line? | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 11:08:08 AM |
Because servers are lighter than mainframes.
You know you've been around computers to long, when that's the first thought that crossed your mind.
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 11:10:21 AM |
Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Because servers are lighter than mainframes.
LMFAO, that's the best answer possible! lol
Servers tend to be cute/sexy youngish women who if they are doing their job correctly are making the customer feel good and important, if anyone can't see why a guy would find that attractive, they need to seriously hit the books or talk to a dating/relationship expert. lol | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 11:27:30 AM | What a stupid question. "Why not!?!" is my answer And you are basing this on one guy? Same reason guys try to pick up any woman: because they find her attractive.
Picking up a server is no different than picking up anyone at a bar/restaurant and those same guys that put the lines on a server will put the lines on any woman they see they wanna aproach. What's the biggie? | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 11:33:44 AM | | actually I flirt with my bank teller on a regular basis. one of my prerequisits for dating is a woman having a job, shows their stable at least! | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 11:38:58 AM |
@magickman
Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Message: Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Because servers are lighter than mainframes.
OMG THATS SO FUNNY hmmm I wonder how many people would actually get that joke?
OT: well the only reason why I would try to pick them up if I was attracted to them but then again thats just me | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 11:53:25 AM | | .....yea I know...I'm trying to but anywho like I said earlier I have tried to pickup the server if I find her attractive unfortunately they ALL tend to be taken!! that just to much of a coincedence don ya think? | |
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*Tee*
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Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 18 | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 12:37:07 PM | No, I'm not saying that at all. It was really just a cheap stab at humor, I'm in one of those effortless moods and just didn't want to get into depth into the real reason men try to pick up their servers.
Truth is, men will try to pick up anyone they find they are attracted enough to. It's not just servers. | |
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*Tee*
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Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 23 | |
| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 12:41:35 PM |
Truth is, men will try to pick up anyone they find they are attracted enough to. It's not just servers.
exactly! Servers, bank tellers, hairstylists, heck I used to teach and some of my male students would hit on me.. and yes they were all over 18, not that I ever considered it | |
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| Why Do Guys Try To Pick Up Their Servers???
Posted: 3/21/2006 12:45:39 PM | Ever,
I was going to say that since servers were trained to bring food and beer when asked they were half trained. If would give us sex when asked they would be fully trained.
Just kinding ladies.
Tee,
All guys hit on their teacher. It's a right of passage. | |
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*Tee*
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Joined: 9/4/2005
Msg: 25 | |
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