| | I need some honest opinions...seriously...Page 1 of 2 (1, 2) | OK... I've been doing this online thing for a while now and have had pretty dismal results. The problem is not with the quality of the women that I've been in contact with, it's the quantity.
I would like to get some truly honest input so I can adjust my expectations if necessary. I do not expect a deluge of women contacting me but it seems like I would have had more than 6 women show interest (through contacting me 1st or replying to my e-mail) in a years time.
So tell me folks, be brutally honest. Why do you think I have had such a lack of interest? Is it my location? Interests? Looks? Is it just that the odds are against me (too high ratio of men to women)? What do you think.
I'm especially interested in feedback from women, but guys feel free to chime in. | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 8:15:08 AM | I searched around and didn't find "tons" - I found a few and the advise is really generic and Dr. Phil/pop-psyche stuff. I'm looking for specific input concerning my own situation. I want some honest commentary on me personally.
So if not here, where do I go for this sort of input? We are taught from a young age not to be rude. Don't tell someone if they act or look unattractive. We aren't completely honest with people because we don't want to hurt someone's feelings. I'm looking for someone to tell me the truth and not worry about feelings. I'm a big boy and I can take it. I want to know! | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 8:16:56 AM | lady..
I posted in the profiles review section and got a couple of responses. They were nice and I have no complaint about that. I was, however, hoping for more of a critical eye. Since you are limited to one post there I am trying a different approach.
Thx | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 8:24:01 AM | | I checked out your profile. I'm a guy so you know.... But I wouldn't trust too many womens opinions either casue lots of them have axes to grind. I guess my first question would be who do you have in mind as a potential mate. We have lots in common especially taste in music, I too used to play in a heavy metal band and had hair down to my waist (gee where'd it all go?). You couldn't tell that from looking at my profile though. It sucks but women who are into heavy metal music nowadays are a rarity and just a simple tick like that in your threads is sadly enough to get you passed by on this site. As for the looks, I can't see that you are much different than anyone else in our bracket. | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 9:08:49 AM | You're a reasonably attractive guy. Even though the 'About Me' bit is supposed to beabout you - we still need to know about the type of woman you are looking for. Your 'About Me' be makes you sound quite self centred for some strange reason.
You've got the type of woman you're looking for in the first date bit. My advice is to cut out some of the stuff about you and move some 'about her' into it.
Too much info about your job (interests me because I'm in Learning & Development) - just what you're doing now is sufficient.
I'd prefer the colour photo - you look better in it.
I don't get a lot of bites either - I just sit here patiently waiting, reading the forums etc.
I know this should be in the Profile Review bit but I'm feeling rebellious  | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 11:02:54 AM | Needless to say, here's another guy chiming in......but I actually think your profile is pretty dam good. I don't see any major holes. I would say, though, that you might be somewhat intimidating to some women because you list so many jobs, interests, hobbies, that some people might feel they would bore you, thus they don't respond. But frankly, I wouldn't change my profile a whole lot to accomodate those people.....
I do agree, though, describing more about what you're looking for might be a good idea. | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 3:14:41 PM | He's had six in a year, that's once every 2 months, I've been on here for about 6 months and had one genuine woman contact me which simply didn't work out...
Mind you I look like the back end of a bus, so that maybe why! lol...
I've only ever had 1 instant message too if were getting into this...
Any major flaws in my profile, please conact me and tell me where - as I don't view the forums much, and I'll see if it's fit to change if necessary...
Rich | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 5:38:50 PM | Maybe you're not logging on enough. Also, you could try contacting ladies that spark your interest as well. Personally, I wouldn't IM a guy first. I'm sure that there are other women that feel the same way. Hope this helps :)
OP  | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 5:58:05 PM | Here's my 2 cents!
I totally agree with a couple of the previous posters re: listing just your current job, and I totally agree that by listing so many interests women might think they'll bore you. It is, though, really well written which we totally appreciate :)
What struck me personally when i read your list of careers was that perhaps you're not settled? too much a free spirit for most women? Maybe many of us like stability and shy away from too much change? Sounds boring as I type it, but i think it's pretty characteristic of most people. Also, you strike me as exceptionally unique...having varied interests and I got a sense that you lean to the alternative versus the mainstream. Maybe there are more mainstream fish in the sea and youre just not getting the hits because of the odds?
I agree that you should describe what kind of woman you're looking for. If I'm reading a profile, I'm more apt to send an email if what he describes fits who I am....even if we have different interests.
Good luck! | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 6:38:17 PM | I wouldn't change a thing, your profile is fleshed out and well-rounded...anyone who responds is bound to be a complete human being and not someone looking to project their fantasy onto a few vague words and a pic.
I think it's simply a numbers game here, and a lot of the women aren't really honestly looking, they are just here to draw attention to themselves and feed their egos.
With all the stuff in your life, and all the things you've done and places you've been and so forth, it's amazing to me you're even on POF. Seriously.
-Greg | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 7:10:50 PM | | Ya know it just goes to show that a good Majority of the people on here are so full of "doo doo". ( I'm not referring to present Company) But I read your profile and the one thing I think that might intimidate the women is they have no Life or Intelligence. You appear to have a great passion for current events and read something beyond The National Enquier-urrrrrr. Its not like you're Globe hopping and jett setting all over the place ....I agree with whats his name that a good majority of women on here are just attention Whores and that sad....My advice forget the Internet dating scene and meet a nice girl at the Library,Barnes and Noble or any thing beyond Dr Suess and I think you would have a better chance.....these are just my opinions but what do I know. | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 7:13:49 PM | Greg I am not here to feed my ego you silly guy I might be drawing attention to myself in hopes that I might turn a smile....and hopefully a challenge from the opposite sex that might perk my interest
Well ok, I might be tripping   tis' fun isnt' it | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 7:30:46 PM | Walden your profile is fine, your smile is genuine...great smile. Extremely handsome...... Your profile says a lot about you, quite diverse. You would be a great date for an adventurous spirit. .... You don’t need to change a thing.  I do think you need to initiate some contacts in here if you want to establish some foundation for meeting ladies.
PS...make the contacts personal...use their name when messaging....drop in some questions....your sure to get responses. Make it real personal constantly use their name in the message.... I think men have used this medium for too long....they have forgotten how to converse or create dialogue...
Empty that list that says how many have you on their fav list. Its' obviously doing nothing for you.... | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 9:46:50 PM | I really appreciate everyone's input. It has been a lot of help. I'm definitely going to make a couple of changes on my profile based on some patterns I see in the comments.
I think this posting and the replies have mostly affirmed what I have already been doing. It seems like "online dating/searching" calls for a healthy balance between understanding just how many people are on these sites and how unique each of us are. Each of us brings all of the good we have to offer along with our preconcieved notions and misconceptions. So there are so many variables that have to come together for a "spark" to fly between two people. It's really amazing we find anyone at all...but we do.
Greg Giraldo once said, "I used to not believe there was someone for everyone till I saw Sigfreid and Roy. How is it that a gay liontamer finds another gay liontamer - what are the odds?"
In statistics, there is a concept that essentially says if you poll a sample group of 1000 people out of a population of 1,000,000 you get basically the same results as if you polled 10,000 people out of that 1,000,000. I think we sometimes think that since we are "polling" more people we will get more positive results. Percentage-wise that may be true, but we will still be confronted with that same percentage of people we are not interested in...just like out in the offline world.
Thanks again for the replies. Everybody say hi sometime!
M | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 3/23/2006 10:42:53 PM | | Well..I have been here for two weeks..in total I have had over 700 emails ..why..its not my pics .. I take terrible pics ..its not my interests..as I have no interests down there..definately not my personality as I have written nothing about that..its not about my passion on who I seek...its about reading mens emails and every dumb question that filled up my own profile...and still evry man got one more question..but then again thats not what gets them back..I think its one thing for the ladies and the gents..I have a full and long profile and you may think its an open book but...ask me one thing..I will answer in three words or less..dont go into depth on the one to one save it trust me | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 6/24/2006 2:47:40 AM | | my personal opinion is this....regardless of people admit it or not(females)Physical Looks are also important,and your pictures could be why you dont get much interest shown in you,lack of head hair?i personally favour the tall dark hair handsome man,your post did ask for HONEST opinions,...amy! | |
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| I need some honest opinions...seriously...
Posted: 6/24/2006 2:59:06 AM | | Just So Funny.(not)Greg And co dear oh dear oh dear,,cant get or attract us stylish-wonderfull-creative-beautifull women..so you resort to saying(females on here are LQQking for attention lol)what you really mean is...you cant hook a fish so you stamp your feet and cry awwwwwwwwww lol,...amy in search of sexi man:-) | |
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