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| WHAT'S YOUR BEST ONE LINER JOKE...AND BE RUDE AND CRUDE?
Posted: 2/5/2005 7:57:40 PM | Was dating Lynda...back in the days before seat-belts were manditory. She was sitting next to me as we were on our date. For some reason, she said to "kiss my ass"...so I gave her a kiss on her lips, and asked what else I could do for her:
Another night, we were watching TV at her folks house.....she told me I must be the dumbest person in the world.
Yes,I replied,I keep dating YOU don't I? Her folks were rolling on the floor.
Hope that you can use these.... | |
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| WHAT'S YOUR BEST ONE LINER JOKE...AND BE RUDE AND CRUDE?
Posted: 2/5/2005 10:08:32 PM | here you go.
There was this man drivin' down an outer road. There was nothing ten miles back and he kept going. His truck all of the sudden broke dowb. he gets out, looks at the engine and he started walking foward since he knew that there wasn't anything ten miles behind him. He finds this farm house a mile ahead. He then walks to the door and knocks. This farmer walks out the door and sais, "Can I help you?" the man sais,"yea, umm.. my truck broke down back there so I was wondering if I could stay the night here and use your tools in the morning." the farmer sais, "Yes. You can sleep in the barn. It's not much but its got a heater." the man sais, "okay, thank you. well i think i'll go ahead and go to bed." the farmer sais, " okay i need to go to bed anyway. but, I'm warning you, do not touch my pink gorilla." The man confused sais," pink gorilla?" the farmer sais, " here, I'll show you.'' The farmer leads the man to the back where the barn is. he opens this hatch and gos down about fifty feet. opens a 2nd hatch that takes 2 men to open. gos down another fifty feet. The 3rd hatch takes a crane to open. so they get in a crane, open it and went down another fifty feet. then gos to this door and opens it. flicks on a light and sais you cannot touch that pink gorilla. they get back out and they both head to bed. about 2 o'clock in the morning the man wakes up and lays there. he thinks,"what would happen if I touched that pink gorilla. he gets up and sais"farmers wake up early cause' they're farmers, so im gonna touch that pink gorilla. he gos down there opens the door and walks to the pink gorilla and taps it. that ink gorilla sweels up, it's eyes all red, and that ma climbs up the ladder as fast as he can closes the last hatch, climbs up the 2nd ladder and coses the 2nd hatcxh as fast as he could, climbs up that last ladder as fast as he could and closes the first hatch as fast as he could. he runs inside the house, grabs the tools runs down the street to his truck, fixes it, and jumps inside and drives off. I mean he was flooring it. and he watched out his mirror and sees that pink gorrila running behind him. his truck breaks down again and he panicks trying to start his truck. the pink gorilla runs beside his truck and rips the door off, taps the man on the shoulde rand sais, ........."you're it."
here you go it may be long but hope you like it dawg. | |
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~Jim~
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Joined: 11/10/2004
Msg: 15 | |
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| WHAT'S YOUR BEST ONE LINER JOKE...AND BE RUDE AND CRUDE?
Posted: 2/6/2005 8:00:51 PM | Why is air alot like sex?
You don't miss it unless your not gettin' any.
What makes men chase women that they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
What does it mean when the post-office has it's flag at half-mast?
They are hiring.
What's the difference between a northern fairytale and a southern fairytale?
A northern fairytale starts out..."Once upon a time..."
A southern fairytale starts out..."ya'll aint gonna believe this sh*t..."
What did the blond say when she found out she was pregnant?
Are you sure it's mine?
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA | |
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