| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:26:57 AM | | Well are ya?? I was just thinkin that there are so many awesome folks here on POF, just wonderin if shyness is something someone can overcome on their own? What do you do to find courage in a situation where you feel a little shy? | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:29:21 AM | Well they just need to go to an event put on with POF'ers
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:32:34 AM | I am very shy.. *quit looking at me*
I believe shyness to be a result of low self esteem...not believing in yourself...no matter how deep seated that can be. Shyness can be overcome with a couple of simple steps...first of all the desire...second of all just doing it...and not worrying about the consequences.
Granted I am putting this into the social aspect...but..IE: asking a girl/guy you have never met for a dance...What is the worst that can happen?? They say no...move on...Oh well. But until we learn that rejection is a part of life...shyness will prevail.
The song "cowboy up" sums it all up. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:33:52 AM | | I'm still working on this one. It is a big reason I haven't gone to any of the PoF events. I'm fine at work, fine talking to someone in a person to person situation but groups make me nervous and I get extremely shy. I'm trying but ohh boy, it is hard. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:34:35 AM | Ehhhhhhhh......... mah name is nutha.....
I used to be soooo shy 
but then I joined POF and started partying 
lol | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:38:51 AM | Far from shy!
I should probably attempt a little reserve at times... | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 11:39:37 AM | Well when Im feelin shy, I just get a few of my POF friends to gather around me and...take my shirt off ......Sheeeeeeesh what was I thinkin? BTW.. I was just changin my shirt dont be gettin the wrong ideas about the HL!! | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 12:38:41 PM | only shy when attracted to someone, otherwise I'm not.............anymore;) hehe...... | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 12:46:38 PM | Sometimes on a coffee-date, I just tell the woman right up front that I’m feeling shy or nervous. If that doesn’t help, I tell her I’m imagining her naked. I think it’s a ToastMasters technique. Maybe Dale Carnegie?
od | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 1:44:05 PM | I had been mercilessly teased by my colleagues in my 20s, so I didn't really have a choice but to deal pretty fast with my shyness and blushing.
But the hardest work to overcome my shyness was to talk in foreign language. That was really hard. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 2:22:53 PM | I used to be so shy, it was crazy. Then I decided shyness was boring (I guess the pain of not talking to people was greater than the pain of over coming it), and opened up a lot. I can easily look someone in the eye and all that good stuff, but I'm still shy in some areas.
For example, if I really care about someone, I start freezing up a bit when it comes to sexual issues unless I'm given a green light... I think this is because of how I was raised, and the last thing I want to do is disrespect a woman who I like.
How to find courage? Commit/start a process which must be carried out to completion.
Examples:
I'm terrified of heights, so I jump off bridges. How did I do the first jump? I sat there for two hours on the edge of the railing, then pushed myself off as far as I could. I hadn't let go, but I knew the only way for me to get back onto the bridge was to fall into the water (a good 35ft drop).
Calling people: Whether clients, or girls: Hitting the send button... commits to talking. I'd be rude to just hang up... | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 2:28:24 PM | shy?
ME?
very!!
k.w.
then who's wang is it? | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 2:41:39 PM | | I'm so shy when its one on one its not funny - I clam up big time..total opposite to who I am in a group..that's why I like the Get Togethers so much | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 2:52:31 PM | | i'm way too shy for my own good....working on it though...sometimes u just have to force yourself...but i do agree that getting out with the pof group helps alot and maybe a couple | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 3:04:33 PM | I can be shy but am getting over it by hanging out with POF.  Basically I've tried to stop worrying what other people think of me...which is a big part of shyness. I know I have friends that like me just the way I am and that helps. And I've realised some guys are even shyer then I am! That helps too:) | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 3:14:49 PM | | are we not all shy to a point till we find that comfort zone to be around ppl | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 5:28:56 PM | When I was growing up, I was very shy. I'm not shy anymore, but I can be quiet. People mistake it for shyness, but I just prefer to keep to myself.
On the other hand, when I drink...you cannot shut me up. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 5:43:37 PM | Yes, me too. Fine at work, but in a group, and meeting new people, I'm very quiet.
Did manage to gather the courage to meet another POF member for coffee last week.
Was I nervous, but I made that first step, what a feeling, nothing can compare, well, maybe some good chocolate. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 5:54:47 PM | | I'm told I'm one of those quite types, which is always mistaken for shyness. When I have something to say, I'll say it. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 6:13:31 PM | | I'm shy at first but it also depends on who I'm talking with. My friends laugh when they hear me say I'm shy. On the other hand, if I'm really interested in someone I'll be shy in the beginning - until our first kiss, then I'm fine after that. lol Not sure why really. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 6:14:59 PM | I'm shy until the first cuervo shot. :D.
Foxx | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 6:16:18 PM | He was a quiet man... paid his rent on time...
But seriously... I can be shy... depends on how much interaction I've had with the person prior to meeting them... the more interaction, the less shy I am... I suppose its the same with most people. | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 6:17:43 PM | | I'm very shy too...Until I get to know a person, I am usually shy..even in group settings I am shy until I get to know some of the people. But,once I know ya, look out...shyness set aside, I am good ole down to earth gal... | |
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 8:46:05 PM | I have definately got the shyness - I played on the same softball team for 10 years and they all thought I was a stuck up **** - but the truth was I was too shy to speak up in a crowd. Made for some really tough seasons, especially throughout the teen years. As for at a party, I often do what my friends refer to as "the turtle"...the more I see other people having a good time talking to each other, the more I feel like I would be intruding if I were to join in.
A poster at the beginning summed it up pretty well - self confidence has a lot to do with being shy: I know I'm not the prettiest, funniest, or smartest person in a room, so why would someone want to talk to me anyway? It definately has a lot to do with why I've never been to a POF get together...
By the way, before someone tells me to cut it out and stop looking for sympathy, trust me, I don't want your pity, I don't want you to tell me that I'm a wonderful special person (I know I'm not and I'm ok with that - I'm very realistic) - I just know that there are many people like me out there and I wanted to share...
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| Are you shy?
Posted: 4/2/2006 9:28:09 PM | I am the polar opposite of shy. I have attempted shyness at certain times in my life because being extroverted has gotten me into seriously hot water more than I wish to admit...but I would with examples if asked, lol.
Nope, not shy at all.  | |
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