| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 5:52:46 AM | As I looked at profiles in my area just now, I found the opportunities to be quite limited. My match criteria is not that restrictive (44-52, 50 mile radius, basic stuff) and I got 52 hits, which is about the daily average I see depending on who quits and who joins on a given day.
Of the 52 I got today, only 21 had photos. Of those 21, 3 were stupid photos of toys and such. Immediately I am down to 18. Of those 18, 2 looked like mug shots taken at a woman's prison. I am down to 16. 3 were SO BIG they didn't fit into the frame of the camera's lens. That brings me down to 13. Of those 13, 2 were photos of the woman seated, and in both cases her butt hung 1 foot of the seat on both sides. I am now at 11. Of those 11, 5 of the profiles were either angry, showed incredible lack of intelligence, or just plain scary. That brings me to 6.
6 women in a 50 mile radius? That's what I have available to me? 6 women?
I am not trying to find a woman who is the perfect conception of what my mind says a woman is supposed to be. I would like to meet someone within maybe 10 years of my age that doesn't smoke, can string at least 3 sentences together, has enough common sense to post a photo that is flattering rather than scary, and isn't too big to fit in my jeep.
That really isn't a lot, is it?
Do the women think they have the same problem? I see SO MANY women on here who are SO PRETTY I would assume they have to chase men away with a baseball bat, and they are on here looking just like all of us are. I don't get it. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:07:35 AM | | Hi, Well you are very honest, at least you get hits! I may get one a day, I dont answer if they don't have a photo. Iv'e found men my age run out & buy a Harley & think they are cool..Most of them, even in their profile mention they like to kiss & hug & touch, well who doesn't?, but not the first time you meet!!!Not for me anyway, It turns me off when thats all they are thinking about..maybe thats why I'm still by myself, but I don't mind, I'd rather be with my pets than settle for less, good luck, Sorrall | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:30:45 AM | YOUR GETTING 52 HITS A DAY! wow,...That should keep ya busy no doubt,...and its no snub on ur ol ego either there dude!...cripes the 20 yr olds i bet dont get that many hits!...personally i get alot less than that !,...surely you must be able to find someone with all those emails...if only everyman on here had the same problem...lol.. ...guess you still got it dude,...good for you!..52 HITS!!!!!!,..sorry im still stuck on the number of hits you get,..lol..cheers.. ..EBA | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:45:39 AM | No no no no no!!! Not 52 hits a day. When I did the search function I got 52 matches!
Nobody writes to my crabby ass.....  | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:50:02 AM | Don't automatically rule out the profiles with no photo. There are some legitimate reasons why people don't put their photos in their profile. It may not have anything to do with being married and hiding.
Some people hate to be judged just on physical appearance.
Some have high profile jobs and don't need to be part of the office gossip.
Some may not have access to digital cameras.
I have found some really great friends on here. Most of them did not have pictures in their profile. After a rapport is established, and confidence is inspired, photos have been exchanged. By that time, you actually have a personality to match to the face. Makes them more than just a picture.
Also, most men put in their profile what they think women want to hear. Give them a chance and sift through the advertising. Some of them are genuine, just don't know how to sell themselves. If they come on too strong, be specific about what you are looking for. If they want something different, move on.
Be strong, confident and try to maintain your sense of humor. The most important thing is attitude. Even bad experiences allow us to learn and grow. Don't allow the process to make you bitter.
You may not meet the man of your dreams, but you could gather some great friends. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:52:00 AM | Well, in my lighthearted way I will reply that *I* am the man of my dreams, but I will apply your response to the female gender and heed it...
Thanks. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:55:30 AM | What are you whining about? My criteria is more open than that and I am looking at the entire state of Montana and I end up with less than that. Count your blessings that with such restrictive criteria you get that many possibilites.
Sheesh! | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:58:28 AM | Sorrall, your response was well said. I couldn't have said it better.
I can relate to the, shall we say, mature gentlemen with Harley's and wanting sex before even getting to know someone. I've been on this site for about 9 months now and I've decided that while I have met some interesting characters with some unique and bizarre ideas, I think I will just come in for the forums. I don't need someone in my life so deparately that I will settle for less or sell myself short in the process. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:02:11 AM | Due to my work environment I prefer not to post photos. It brings unwanted attention from coworkers.
On topic: I have become extremely picky because of the things I read and witness. It appears that it's a free-for-all in the dating world and I certainly have no interest in being a part of that. I have two daughters to set an example for.
The trend (for both genders) seems to be to date younger... I'm not into that so it gets a little discouraging knowing that the woman you have an interest in is busy with the younger ones, so I won't waste her time or mine. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:05:19 AM | | My experience has been that there are plenty of suitable ladies out there, just they all come with so much 'baggage' - kids, grandkids, ex's etc etc. Hard to see the wood for the trees. I've no gripes about the number of matches I get on here - just with most of them its their situation that is the killer. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:16:19 AM | Restrictive? An age range and 50 miles distance is restrictive? My point is only that in my age group the opportunities seem to be few and far between.
How many users would you estimate are in Montana to begin with? And how restrictive is your search? This statistical kind of stuff actually interests me on the geek level. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:21:08 AM | I don't know how many are in Montana but my age range is younger then 45 and well Lets Just say Montana takes a couple days to drive across at 75 mph. Distance wise I usualy go with 200 miles though...even though 200 miles depending on which way you go and you might still be in Montana.
So yes I would say your grouping is restrictive comparitively. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:31:04 AM | Sorrall, my mid-life crisis placebo was a jeep....
St Paul Girl, I know there are many reasons that people don't post photos. I have met a few of them, and the few I met were in the group that don't post it for the obvious reason.
Shadow, I was in Montana once for 5 days. I didn't see ONE CAR go as slow as 75! One guy went past me in a Ford truck that I think crossed Montana in maybe 45 minutes!
The geographic area I cover in northeast Ohio with a radius of 50 miles probably means a population base of 1.5 million, as it includes both Akron and Cleveland. Obviously not all 1.5 million are on POF, and stripping out the married people (who don't care to cheat), the men (not my style), and the young 'uns, I would still expect to have a fairly large pool of available women.
Then when you factor out the women who think I'm a total and complete waste of space, the number gets even smaller... | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:41:31 AM | *chuckles
Well that may be the population of Montana. well 75 is the posted speed limit...lol. We do usually drive more like 85. Besides when you have so far to travel to see anyone you tend to drive faster...
But as far as the number who seem to think I am a waste of space when it comes to dating so far that seems to be 100% so far......based on the number of responses I get to initial e-mails to the few women in the area. Kinda funny since they are usually whining about the lack of a dating scene in Montana too... | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:48:38 AM | | Given your location eastsideeddie, I suspect the problem is that this site doesn't have many members in your area. You may need a dating site with a larger membership - unfortunately, most are pay sites. However, it could be worth it if the match numbers are much higher. Try a search on match.com and see who turns up - you can do that much without joining and it may help you decide if it may be worth it for you. I had great success there in the past, but other people have not - partly, I think it has a lot to do with how you use these sites. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:59:52 AM | Zentral, that is probably a very accurate statement. Given that this is a free system it's probably full of people who are as tight fisted as I am!
I once went to eHarmony and went through their little screening thing, and they rejected me! Yahoo is a waste of time as well.
The part that bothers me is the sensitivity. As soon as you disagree with someone, the name calling starts, they go and rate your photo with a 1 as if that is in some childish way getting even with you....
Man, if you don't like what I say, don't talk to me and I won't bother you either. Simple as that. Part of the angry society we have to live in, I guess....
Someone went off on me BIG TIME because I once put up a post about how AOL is responsible for "dumbing down" the computer community with their "You can be online in 5 minutes" campaign. Well, yeah, you can be connected and they can start charging you in 5 minutes, but that doesn't mean that suddenly you know everything there is to know about a computer and the web. Geeze, I went to college for this and have a degree and several certifications but I don't think I know it all.
Yet they take it out on me because they can't figure out how to follow a menu and upload a frickin' photo....
Maybe I'll go for one month on match.com and see how it goes.
Or maybe not. You're born alone, you die alone, you may as well spend the time between alone too..... | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 9:20:21 AM | Eastsideeddie, I'm just wondering if your changed your perspective if that might help a little. Instead of being intent on meeting someone for keeps, how about meeting someone to make a new friend. No that person may not be someone you want as a significant other, but you never know who that someone might know that you might meet through having a friendship with that person. It's amazing who you could possiblly meet by changing your focus and just broadening your social circle but be upfront with these people about looking for new friendships.
Tunnel visions gives you just that - a tunnel. Maybe some of those ladies that you discounted in your original post may have a lot more to offer than you give them credit for. Maybe you could take a second look with a different perspective? Just a thought but I think it's one worthy of further thought. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 9:30:38 AM | | I'd love to answer that off forum because it will be a bit long and introspective, but I can't because of your restriction for Canadians only. If you email me I can reply however, so if you would like to hear a response to your very good post, I'd love to share it with you. | |
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| Slimmer pickin's when you get older?
Posted: 4/14/2006 11:27:55 AM | Aaaaah so thats where they all are!
No-one seems to know about this site over here in this part of the world.....
Never mind Eddie, there's always chocolate and potato crisps... yee haaa  | |
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