| Why is it so hard to go from friends to more
Posted: 4/24/2006 3:42:02 PM | | I have absolutely no trouble becoming friends with guys they all tell me how much they love me and love being around me why is it they all just want to be friends and never more, or you find a guy that you like so you become friends and try for more and all they want is sex. I don't understand what I am doing wrong all of my relationships have been with nice looking guys and they have lasted upwards of 6 months and then it just ends and they want to be friends and tell me about their new girlfriends. | |
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| Why is it so hard to go from friends to more
Posted: 4/24/2006 5:29:23 PM | | I am all too familiar with this. In my own experience if you are looking to date you cannot make friends with someone before hand. It just complicates things. Then again, if you dont make friends you wont know anything about them. I had a huge crush on a girl a while back. I hung out with her all the time, watching movies, just driving around and so forth. Then later I found out she had a crush on me so I went for it and put it all out on the line. She told me no so I asked why. She told me it was because we are way too good friends and she doesnt want to ruin that. I later found someone else by chance and the girl was pissed off and jealous by the fact that I was with someone else. My advice is to try and not be the cool chick friend. Make your intensions known before hand. Doesnt have to be with words but give big hints at it. | |
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| Why is it so hard to go from friends to more
Posted: 4/24/2006 9:41:27 PM | My experiences tell me that the men who just want to be friends but also want sex and then date again in a few months is as follows:
They are not committed- either not over the last one or not ready for a new one. They like the comforts of friendship and the passion of sex, but do not want the committment that goes with having a relationship.
Hold out for something better...and you will truly find what you are seeking. We all seek comfort every now and then but settling for less than what we are wanting and looking for becomes hurtful in the end. | |
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| Why is it so hard to go from friends to more
Posted: 4/24/2006 9:48:43 PM | no commitment...i am labelled friends by them ...then thats all there will be ...seems most men have to be clear as to what they want from us....friends to something possible ?or just friends.?..big difference...
theyre not sure if they want something serious at the time...maybe they do...makes them unsure..so they put us in the friend zone on hold...but up to you what you tolerate. i wont tolerate being second to anyone ..no matter what..so friends it is...no more.
if you have a friend belief then stick to it...dont let them or anyone change it. i myself dont have any type of sexual contacts with my good friends so why would i with them. i dont f**k my friends....lol..so to speak. guys have to understand the minute you label us friend...then thats all you will get....so you get what you ask for.
if two people meet..why does anyone have to label it anyways ? this is a date site yes? lol | |
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| Why is it so hard to go from friends to more
Posted: 5/17/2006 7:38:48 AM | I feel sorry for you but I doubt if thats what you need. Sex and the City the TV show is so much different from the Sex and the Village reality spin-off if you know what I mean. People are so used to dispensing advice from the micro or macrocosm they belong to.
Its good to hear other peoples perspectives but it would be hard to find one that matches a fit to your unique view I think. Small towns are so different.
Maybe you should try and look before you leap (know what youre getting into) and set up some guidelines for what you expect in a relationship.
Sounds maybe like youre having fun while the party lasts but left alone to clean up and wondering why this is so. Good for you. You probably have a lot to offer and bring to a relationship but others dont realize it. Maybe not even your self. We all have blind spots.
Believe it or not. -lol
One road to loneliness
Its always the same
One road it happiness
Its calling your name
Keep looking for changes
PS Sorry about that...just a song that I have been listening to lately. You dont have
to "get it". | |
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| Why is it so hard to go from friends to more
Posted: 5/17/2006 7:55:22 AM | | The problem I think is the guys that you are picking. Believe me I tend to go for the non-committal guys as well. Like someone said above me if you are looking for a relationship then don't start out as friends. Also in there you need to find out if the person you are dating has the same love interests. Find out if their on the same level as you are. Do they have past ex issues they are still struggling with? Are they currently looking for a relationship or just to mess around? These are good questions to find out before you get to know someone. Make it known at the very beginning that you want more out of this relationship than just friends or sex you are actually looking for a real relationship. This makes it clear to your date what you are going to put up with and what you are not. Those just looking for sex/friends will run like hell the minute you mention that to them the "r" word thus helping you to sort through who will be good and bad for you. Good luck! | |
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